"kilikini" > wrote in message
...
>
> Anyone have any ideas on what to cook for an old, toothless, tired, picky,
> crotchety, retired hillbilly?
> kili

Sounds familiar.

How bout pinto beans and simmered with big smoked ham hocks?
I get the best ham hocks from a German deli (have them cut in half).

When finished cooking, strip the meat from the hocks and add to the beans.