On Mon, 25 Aug 2008 16:18:05 -0700, Paul M. Cook > wrote:
> OK Irish jokes are my favorite.
>
> An old man in Dublin calls his son in New York right before Christmas and
> says, "Son, I 'm sorry, but I have to tell you that after 45 years of
> misery, your mother and I are busting up. " "Da, what are you talking
> about?" the son yells in disbelief. "We can't stand the sight of each other
> any longer," the father says. "We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of
> talking about this, so you call your sister in Chicago and tell her."
> Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. "No way
> they're leaving each other!" she shouts, "I'll take care of this." She
> calls Dublin immediately and screams at her father, "You are not splitting
> up. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back,
> and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a thing, DO YOU HEAR
> ME?" and hangs up. The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife.
> "Well then," he says, "they're coming home for Christmas and paying their
> own way!"
Mostly I lurk, but as long as we're telling groaners....
An old prospector walks his tired old mule into a western town one day. Hed
been out in the desert for about six months without a drop of whiskey. He walked
up to the first saloon he came to and tied his old mule to the hitch rail. As
he stood there brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young
gunslinger walked out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of
whiskey in the other. The young gunslinger looked at the old man and laughed,
saying, Hey old man, have you ever danced? The old man looked up at the
gunslinger and said, No, I never did dance. I just never wanted to. A
crowd had gathered by then and the gunslinger said, Well, you old fool,
youre gonna dance now, and started shooting at the old mans feet. The old
prospector was hopping around and everybody was laughing.
When the gunslinger fired his last bullet, he holstered his gun and turned
around to go back into the saloon. The old man reached up on the mule, drew
his shotgun, and pulled both hammers back making a double clicking sound.
The gunslinger heard the sound and everything got quiet. The crowd watched
as the gunslinger slowly turned around looking down both barrels of the
shotgun. The old man asked, Did you ever kiss a mule square on the ass?
The gunslinger swallowed hard and said, No. But Ive always wanted to.
The lessons from this story a
1. Dont waste ammunition.
2. Dont mess with old guys.
--
Jerry Gaiser in North Plains, Oregon USA - 45.6933N 123.0418W
http://www.gaiser.org/knitblog/ -- When Knitting Was a Manly Art
"...Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving
safely in one pretty and well-preserved piece, but to slide across the
finish line broadside, thoroughly used up, worn out, leaking oil, and
shouting GERONIMO!!!" -- Bill McKenna