My wife and I went to Mardi Gras so we could experience some wonderful
diversity. I danced in the streets with a few wonderfully diverse
people, both men and women, while my wife had sex with a line of
strange men in a portable washroom, several at a time.

She dosen't like to dance much anyway.

One person I was dancing with asked for some change but I had none.

Another person said I should be nice to him and buy him a beer,
instead I was kind enough to let him finish a half cup of beer I had
purchased earlier in the day that had grown luke warm while we danced.
I hope he enjoyed it since he didn't return the cup when he had
finished but thats ok as I purchased another and returned to dancing
with other people.

I was getting hungry and set off to find some wonderfully divers food
like Gumbo, Gritts or chicken, something ethnic like that, when I came
upon a tall fat woman streched out across the sidewalk and vomiting in
the gutter. When she finished heaving and grunting she wiped the
spital from around her mouth, smeared it on her shirt and asked if I
wanted to buy some " Meths".

I gave her some money but she never returned with it or them.

In the garbage strewn gutter, right next to where she had originally
thrown up, I found some decorative beads. I asked around for the
original owner but got little response from my fellow party goers so I
took them to the lost and found at a nearby bar, the same one I
purchased the beer from as a matter of fact.

Inside the bar, a strange woman pulled her top up to expose her
breasts but didn't take her bra off, so what was the point of that?
When I asked her why she didn't expose her breasts she said she wanted
a beer so I bought her one but she still never exposed her breasts.

As I left the bar I noticed my wallet was gone so I went back inside
to inquire as to its where abouts but got little response from the
patrons.The diverse bartender said it might show up in a few days so
I'll have to go back and get it.

On the way out I noticed the woman with the breasts decide to expose
them to some other guys in the back area of the bar.

When I finally found my wife we decided to leave because we were about
out of money and our house is about to be foreclosed on.

When we got back to our car we noticed someone had broken in and
deficated on the driver seat. It looed as tho they were trying to
spell something but it's somewhat unclear at this point as to what it
was, so we cleaned it up as best as we could but you can still smell
it and there is also a huge stain on the seat. Needless to say we had
to drive back to Des Peres with our windows partially rolled down.

Someone also stole the windshield wiper blades off our vehicle but we
have now replaced them.

Now that I think of it, those beads probably belonged to that tall,
fat woman who was puking in the gutter.