On May 30, 2:57*pm, §ñühw¤£f > wrote:
> In message >,
>
> wrote:
> > Date: 05-30-2009
>
> > Time: 07:00 AM
>
> > Weight: 1.5 pounds
>
> > Number of turds: 13 rabbit turd styled feces
>
> > Consistency: Like Play-Doh
>
> How do you determine this?
> Waitaminute...I dont wanna know

I put on latex gloves and examine the feces very closely. I do it for
scientific purposes and post the results here in my "Diabetic Bowel
Movement" logs as a service to the diabetic community.

> > Color: *Brown with orange and yellow speckles
>
> > Odor: *Very little
>
> > Previous day's intake: *Several blocks of extra sharp cheddar cheese,
> > peanut butter sandwiches, boiled eggs, bacon, baked potatoes, several
> > loaves of white and brown bread, several boxes of cheese and crackers,
> > and carrot cake.
>
> Holy Schnikes!!!!!!1111!!!!!!!!

I'm a big man, I have a big appetite!

> > Comments: *Barely mustered the meager bowel movement noted above, took
> > several enemas to try and pass more but enjoyed no additional
> > success. *Will megadose some laxatives to try and force a better bowel
> > movement for tomorrow's report.
>
> A hit of 500mg vitamin C daily should loosen you right up, mate.
> If thats not enough, increase it to twice a day.

A package of exlax and a pint of caster oil will purge anything, even
10 pounds of cheddar cheese ;-)