Pennyaline wrote:
> Omelet wrote:
>> In article >,
>> Pennyaline > wrote:
>>
>>> Chemiker wrote:
>>>> On Sun, 24 May 2009 05:24:17 GMT, Wayne Boatwright
>>>> > wrote:
>>>>
>>>>> On Sat 23 May 2009 04:33:46p, Chemiker told us...
>>>> Understood, and with sympathy.
>>>>
>>>> There is no way that one can prepare for a
>>>> death, no matter what they say.
>>> How ironic. I started reading this thread yesterday, but
>>> interrupted it to go visit my mother in the hospital.
>>>
>>> She was supposed to be fine. She was supposed to have surgery,
>>> recover and come home. I went to visit her yesterday morning
>>> anticipating nothing untoward. It would be a short visit, then I
>>> had to go to the store, then swing by post office to drop some
>>> envelopes into the boxes, go home, feed the animals, have a little
>>> lunch myself, get some housework done before the holiday, then go
>>> back to see her again in the late afternoon.
>>>
>>> She was in respiratory failure when I arrived at 10:00 AM. They
>>> figure she threw a clot, unavoidable after her surgeries earlier
>>> this year and her diminished mobility. After the clot lodged in
>>> her
>>> lungs, her age and overall weakened condition took it from there.
>>> She didn't respond to any medical interventions.
>>>
>>> She failed so fast. We, her children, knew her wishes. We withdrew
>>> bipap, stopped all meds except Versed and Morphine, and let her
>>> go.
>>> She died at 6:10 PM. I'll never see her again. I still can't
>>> believe it.
>>
>> Geezus Penny. I'm so sorry!
>> I really do know how that feels. :-(
>>
>> HUGS!!!
>>
>> How old was she?
>
> My thanks to all for your responses. She was 83, but it was still a
> huge surprise. Events since January took a lot out of her. She had
> spent only six weeks at home this year. Too many complications to
> knee replacement surgery, too long spent in rehabilitation centers.
> It was startling how deconditioned she was when she finally came
> home
> in late April after the second attempt at joint replacement in
> February. At home, she started bleeding from the large intestine,
> brought on by weeks of antibiotic treatment and decades of NSAID use
> for pain control, but her prospects immediately after the
> exploratory
> lap and partial bowel resection were actually quite good and she was
> doing remarkably well for her age and overall condition. She was
> awake and oriented times three, talking a blue streak per her norm
> and wondering when they were going to let her eat again. Then with
> the next beat, it was all over.
> I am very lucky that we left nothing unsaid and very little not
> done.
> My greatest desire, since my daughter and I moved into this new
> place
> in December of 2008 was to have my mother come for a meal and sit in
> front of my fireplace. The houses I lived in before this one had
> stairways in the entrances, and by the middle of last year she had
> become unable to climb stairs even with help. This house has only
> two
> steps up to the front porch, and the rest is clear and level
> sailing,
> but her mobility was so bad in December that she couldn't even
> negotiate those. So we talked at length about having her come over
> for dinner once she got the knee done, which should have been all
> done and dusted by the end of February after surgery in January. But
> after January's surgery, the tibia cracked. The surgery was repeated
> in February with a new prosthetic joint and revision and repair of
> the tibia, but rehab for that surgery was slow and seemed to go
> nowhere. In March she was still in a rehab center barely able to
> bend
> the knee and scarcely able to put weight on her foot, and spent most
> of her time sitting in her room sleeping in a chair. But coming for
> dinner remained a popular topic for discussion between us during
> in-person visits and phone calls during that long period, and she
> loved deciding what we would have to eat. She was finally discharged
> home with home care and physical therapy in late April, and after
> months away was home for the birth of her first great grandchild.
> She
> still couldn't do stairs and didn't really feel like eating, but for
> three weeks we continued to talk about having her over as soon as
> she
> felt better, and she ultimately decided on roast chicken and peas.
> After her abdominal surgery, she told me again that the plan was
> still on. At this moment, it is the only thing that didn't get done
> that I would like the chance to complete.

I'm so sorry - my heart goes out to you and wishes you comfort.

Dora