In article
>,
Lynn from Fargo Ografmorffig > wrote:

> Excuse me, friends. As a former mental health worker, I feel bound to
> tell you that most of you are doing just what Andy wants and needs.
>
> This is a manifestation of a severe and persistent mental illness
> known as "Addictive Verbal Masochist/Sadist VIctim Syndrome". His
> brain chemistry is disturbed.
>
> Andy feeds on your negative feedback (that's why they call it
> feedback). You can respond in either of two ways:
>
> 1. Respond in the same way and feed his pathetic addiction. This is
> the fuel which keeps the vitriolic rants coming and provides him joy
> in the only tragic way he can experience it:
> " . . . I'll have you know, I don't miss you either! You're nothing
> special. Sorry
> to break the bad news old man. You'll read this! It's in your bullshit
> nature."
>
> 2. Ignore him and eventually there will be no thread to provide the
> "drug" he so desperately desires. This will only frustrate him to the
> point where he gets no pleasure and eventually gives up.
>
> I know it's difficult for good, kind folks to hear the bigotry and
> homophobia he spews. Responding in-kind, however, is a knee jerk
> reaction. Better to understand that ignoring him is the very
> effective therapy that only we can provide.

3. Respond to his reasonable posts only. This will give him the
feedback that we value him, at least sometimes. There are significant
periods of time when Andy's posts are just fine.

[Note that I am *not* a therapist, or anyone who knows much about
treating people for psychological problems. However, I have three adult
children, and they have mostly turned out well. This is just SOP.
Ignore them, or if they can't be ignored, give them a Time Out. We can
ignore Andy sometimes, and we can killfile him (a time out).]

--
Dan Abel
Petaluma, California USA