In article >,
"cshenk" > wrote:

> "maxine in ri" wrote
>
> > My husband's church has "small group dinners" where the host supplies
> > the main course and assigns the guests the appetizer, salads, sides,
> > and desserts.
>
> I dislike being 'assigned' a dish, but do not at all mind a sign up list, or
> a conglom while we all offer what we wanna bring and settle it out.
>
> > Dh and i were assigned salad and bread,
> >
> > the hostess
> > said "Oh, we don't need a salad. This other person brought ..
> > She also brought (which I wasn't told) a basket of artisan bread, so
>
> > If I had been the hostess, I probably would have told her, as the
> > guests who were assigned those courses arrived, that while her
> > offerings were lovely, it would be kind of her to let the other people
> > share theirs rather than have the other guests shoved aside for her
> > ego.
>
> I too would be angry. It isnt polite to start with the 'assign' a dish, but
> if one must, then you *never* dump the assigned person's gift in favor of
> some other person who rudely brought a competing one.
>
> We had one like that many years ago at our simple neighbor gathers. She'd
> try to 'one up' other folks dishes so we would 'ooh and ahh' over what a
> great cook she thought she was. She was 'de-invited'. Afterall, if Amy was
> bringing a simple green bean cassarole, she didnt need to sit there turning
> beet red while 'The Ass' tried to trump it all with her version. We wanted
> Amy's version and her conversation.

As hostess, it'd behoove her to simply let both people put out their
offerings, then let the other guests decide what they want to eat.

Same as any other potluck!

We have potlucks all the time at work and a signup list is put up. If
someone brings their signed up offering and other stuff, it's ALL put
out! No harm, no foul. :-)
--
Peace! Om

"Human nature seems to be to control other people until they put their foot down."
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