Last weekend I was sitting near the underside of the Canyon Ridge
Bridge like a good little troll and .. uh-oh... here down the paved
path comes somebodies wet dog that's going to want to get friendly
with me. Sorry, dog. The sign clearly says, "No Wet Dogs Allowed
Near Steve". I look away for a second, but out of the corner of my
eye I see it's still coming and I don't see anything human behind
it...

Wait, that's an odd looking dog. It's not a dog at all, it's a
big-ass ferret. Hmm, maybe not. Too big to be a ferret or even a
weasel. It looks like a cross between a wiener dog and a seal. Is
that.... a platypus?! Hmm, no, that would be a wiener dog and a
duck. Oh my god, it's a god-damned swamp rat! Holy shit, I thought
those were urban legends! Are they dangerous? Because this one is
almost on me and staring at me like I'm his lunch... But there's
something almost comic about this...

He passes in front of my feet about 18 inches away, still staring at
me as if to say, "Have you figured it out yet?". I thought and said
it at the same time: "You're an otter, aren't you?". He passed by
and slipped into the water as all four of his outboard engines
kicked in and he was gone, but not before I could have sworn he
said, "Swamp rats don't swim like *this*, you dumbass!"

I haven't seen an otter since... watching Grizzly Adams when I was
10 years old. Apparently they've just recently started invading
Austin.

<http://www.wfaa.com/news/entertainment/pets/Rarely-seen-Texas-otter-may-be-making-a-comeback-84233467.html>

Last year I was one of the few and the first to report hearing a
Giant Cicada return to Texas, and this year it's the platypus. Err,
otter. Whatever. You folks need to get out to nature more :-)

Oh, back to the story line...

I smelled onions at Canyon Ridge right before the otter incident.
In fact, I've probably smelled onions 15 times along smaller
waterways in Austin but never really gave it a second thought. Why
- I don't know. It's food after all.

Later on that same day I went through Mearns Meadow Park which
carries part of Little Walnut Creek. Some Mexicans had just
finished kicking around a black and white ball and a few of them
headed for the swampy part of the creek. Maybe they took a ****,
too, but they each came up with a few handfuls of weeds and crossed
to the other side of the park.

I thought that was strange, too. Why stop at a few handfuls when
there's still a half an acre of weeds over there?

Later as I went through the other side of the park, there were the
ball-kicking weed-pullers grilling some stuff. I smelled some
burgers, but mostly what I smelled were onions. Lots of onions.

Finally, my superior IQ kicked in and I deduced that....

There must be a grilled otter and onion taco stand somewhere in
Austin that's open on Mother's day. Any suggestions?

-sw