On 3/2/2016 9:01 PM, wrote:
> So far, very few comments.
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> https://www.bostonglobe.com/magazine....html#comments
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> We are close to a couple who live about two hours away. When we visit them, we never eat in (maybe breakfast). The restaurants are nice but expensive, and after driving a couple of hours, I am not thrilled about getting back in our car. It seems a little rude. Am I being too sensitive? We love them but wish we could get them to just stay home and cook a meal once in a while. They have a great kitchen.
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> M.A. / Methuen
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> Houseguests cant demand that their hosts cook for them. Thats way out of line. You can, however, mention that the driving and expense of restaurants gets old. (Dont feel as if youre poor-mouthing if you do. It doesnt matter if you can afford the restaurants; the point is that youd rather not spend your money that way.) Then you propose alternatives. The most obvious one€‰€”€‰given your admiration of that kitchen€‰€”€‰is that youll bring some food and do a bit of cooking yourself. €œInstead of going to Chez Fancypants, how about I make a pot of chili when we get there?€� you say, the advantage of something like chili or soup being that youll also have leftovers for lunch the next day or two. Breakfast and lunch are meals that dont need to be cooked, merely €œfixed,€� so you can also suggest bringing cold cuts and fruit and so on. In short, €œLets not eat out so much€� is a reasonable request. €œFix dinner for us€� is not.
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> When you make these suggestions, your friends may very well volunteer to cook dinner at home or stock up on Lunchables before your visit. Thats great, if they do, but that isnt your goal. Your goal is to drive and spend less for meals, because thats achievable. Making your friends version of hospitality match up perfectly with your own€‰€”€‰not so much.
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> (end)
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> Lenona.
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Are you sure that your hosts enjoy cooking? They may have a "great
kitchen," but some people are embarrassed about cooking for guests while
others enjoy it. I also have some friends who do not want to cook when
they have guests because they prefer spending the time visiting. I do
think it would be appropriate to suggest that you opt for less expensive
restaurants.

MaryL