On Saturday, August 12, 2017 at 1:39:50 PM UTC-5, Dave Smith wrote:
>
> On 2017-08-12 12:51 PM, wrote:
>

> > I would have had to speak up and say "STOP! You're not going to eat
> > e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g before the guests arrive." I truly would have
> > said that to her.
>
> Sounds good, but you really should not have to say that to a guest,
> especially an uninvited one.
>
True.
>
> I got into enough trouble with her when she
> was a teen and especially sensitive.
>
That sounds like the root of the problem. She was sensitive and then
was catered to by her mom.
>
> I leave it to her mother to deal
> with it. She knows her daughter has a problem. She knows that I have a
> problem with her daughter, and she is sympathetic. I simply try to avoid
> having anything deal with her.
>
Well, if she's 58 it safe to bet mom won't be around another 30 years
to make excuses for her as that's what her mom is doing. She's trying
to soothe you as well as obnoxious daughter.
>
> Considering how much she eats, I am surprised that she is not a hell of
> a lot bigger than she is. It is not her size that is the issue. It is
> her obsession with eating. It is a pain in the ass to have to invite her
> to family functions and then to have to go to the work and expense to
> provide twice as much food for a gathering when one person eats enough
> for 6 or more. And it annoying as hell to go onto the kitchen for
> something and find her opening a box of crackers of cookies in the
> pantry when there is all sorts of food out. Who, in their right mind,
> attends a social function in someone's home and sneaks away from the
> food service to root around for more food?
>
She does this because she feels 'entitled' because she's family. I
simply would have to lay down the lay to her and not be in the least
bit timid about calling her out for her behavior. But she's your
relative and you have to deal with her selfish, self-centered behavior.