On Thu 20 Jan 2005 12:34:50p, Virginia Tadrzynski tittered and giggled,
and giggled and tittered, and finally blurted out...

>
> "Wayne Boatwright" > wrote in message
> ...
>> On Thu 20 Jan 2005 11:48:59a, Denise~* tittered and giggled, and
>> giggled and tittered, and finally blurted out...
>>
>> >
>> >> No sillier than your assuming your child is "entertainment" for
>> >> everybody in public. Not everyone wants to be entertained by
>> >> someone elses kids. I'd rather pay for my entertainment and choose
>> >> its venue. Silly and giddy, possibly loud and boisterous, underfoot
>> >> and in the way, are not characteristics that I find appealing when
>> >> I'm trying to shop or eat in a rewtaurant. AFAIC, it's an
>> >> unpleasant distraction.
>> >
>> > Actually, it wasn't an assumption. Just about every time we go out I
>> > get a compliment and/or a smiles toward my kid. the compliment is
>> > typically about how cute/well behaved he is. It's nice to hear, and
>> > also reinforces my belief that I must have a special child, because I
>> > don't think this is all learned behavior. I think my boy's
>> > personality is very different than the average child. I think the
>> > noisiest he gets is typically a boisterous giggle, because we would
>> > be probably making faces to each other or doing something silly while
>> > shopping or standing in line.
>>
>> Denise, I hope you didn't take this personally. It wasn't meant so.
>> Given your description of your son's behavior, you are to be
>> congratulated on your attentiveness and your child-rearing skills. You
>> and your son are probably ones who I would compliment.
>>
>> > One thing I never do is let him run around aimlessly either. He
>> > always sits in the cart, and if he ever got too old to do that, he
>> > would be taught to walk by my side & behave.
>>
>> From my experience, this is not usually what I see.
>>
>> > I think a lot that might have to do with this is that I am a work at
>> > home mom & he has never had to spend any time in daycare. We also
>> > "talk" to him and treat him with a level of respect that I don't
>> > believe some parents do. We also hold the belief that most "popular"
>> > and PC child rearing practices are bull.
>>
>> You are probably right about the popular and PC child rearing
>> techniques.
>>
>> >> You are absolutely correct. When a parent IS a good mentor, then a
>> >> child should certainly be with them in public. All too often,
>> >> however, parents act as though their child isn't even there and
>> >> exert absolutely no authority over them in controlling their
>> >> behaviour. What really ****es me off are the parents that think
>> >> their child's misbehavior is "cute". It clearly is not. Just last
>> >> week I encountered a couple in the supermarket with three children
>> >> who were probably under the age of five. They were near the end of
>> >> an aisle I was trying to exit, noisily running back and forth,
>> >> rolling around on the floor, and blocking the aisle. I had to turn
>> >> around and traverse the entire aisle to get away from them. There
>> >> is no excuse for such behavior.
>> >>
>> >> When I see well-behaved children, I make it a point to comment on
>> >> this to the parent. Unfortunately, this is all too seldom.
>> >
>> > So why would you assume the opposite just because it's seldom that
>> > you see it?
>>
>> I'm not assuming anything. Mostly I see ill-behaved children with
>> parents who either don't care or don't recognize it themselves.
>> Possibly the parents are just as ill-behaved in their own way in other
>> venues. What see least are well-behaved children with attentive
>> parents.
>>
>> > As a matter of fact, about 6 months ago we were at home depot & my
>> > boy was acting just a little too hyper. he was sitting in the cart,
>> > but was driving ME nuts even. On the way home I called DH and asked
>> > him to meet me at a park & ride. We exchanged cars & then I went
>> > grocery shopping.
>> > That is the only time we have ever had to do that.
>>
>> Obviously, your love and diligence in raising your son has paid big
>> dividends. I understand that children's behavior can be unpredictable,
>> and this instance you clearly did the right thing. I wish more parents
>> would do the same.
>>
>> Cheers,
>> Wayne
>>
> What really ****es me off royally is the intervener who tells me I
> should 'lighten up, they're just kids' when I try to reprimand my kids.
> I took the three remaining trolls to a diner one night when my husband
> had a late meeting. (Oldest in the Navy, let Uncle Sam deal with his
> manners) The 13 year old and the 11 year old were at each other from
> the start. The 8 year old not to be left out jumped in. I told them
> that we were in a public place and to behave. It didn't work.......I
> asked the waitress, who had brought them drinks but hadn't taken our
> order yet to give me a check for the drinks, we were leaving. They
> looked at me like I had three heads and started whining 'why'. I told
> them that if they misbehave in public there are consequences....like
> going home to a pbj. Which is exactly what they got for dinner when
> they got home. They weren't happy, but I told them the old adage...íf
> mom ain't happy, ain't no body happy ....I refuse to be made look bad in
> public by misbehaving children. On the way out, an older woman stopped
> me and told me to 'lighten up, they were just children'....I told her
> when should I step in? When they threw chairs at each other? She
> looked at me in horror, but I then turned around and asked her did her
> children behave that way in public when they were younger and would she
> have put up with it....? I left, children in tow, public seeing I took
> charge, and one older lady with her mouth open.
> -Ginny

APPLAUSE!!!

Wayne