1. I worked at an Apple-Friday-Benne-Houli-Outback place for a while and
the company mandated that the FIRST thing we said to anyone who came in the
door was "What brings you in here today?" I worked at the bar and saw some
of the same customers 6 days a week and I still had to say it.

2. I have a store rebate card from about 10 years ago when I used to buy
for my college fraternity house. I still get amused when the checker says,
"Thank you Mr. Pi." I usually just tell them to call me "Alpha."

3. As far as calls for reservations? I used to say my name was
"communist" - as in "table for 4 ready for the communist party." Oh well, I
am warped.