Well, this has been highly informative! My big mistake, apparently, was using a
plastic bowl, which wasn't even chilled properly. I will try to find cream that
is at least 40% butterfat next time, and try to get something that isn't
ultra-pasteurized.

I don't see myself buying the canned stuff- I'm cutting out the sugar by making
it at home. I likewise do not see myself buying a whipped cream charger, as
suggested, because that would just be asking for trouble!

Thanks to everyone,
-Jen
Half the people you know are below average. -Steven Wright