In alt.flame.jesus.christ, purpurroterwald said...

> St. Jackanapes > wrote in
> :
>
> >
> > In alt.flame.jesus.christ, Father Haskell said...
> >
> >> On May 22, 11:45 pm, St. Jackanapes >
> >> wrote:
> >> > In alt.flame.jesus.christ, Father Haskell said...
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> > > On May 21, 10:09 am, "Andrew B. Chung, MD/PhD"
> >> > > > wrote:
> >> > > > Behold in manifold wonder and stunning amazement:
> >> >
> >> > > > (1) The miracle of the parting of the Red Sea:
> >> >
> >> > > >http://TruthRUS.org/RedSea
> >> >
> >> > > Never happened.
> >> >
> >> > > > (2) The miracle of the USS Texas surviving both World Wars with
> >> > > > only one casualty:
> >> >
> >> > > >http://TruthRUS.org/DreadNought
> >> >
> >> > > Not a miracle.
> >> >
> >> > Oh, I don't know. Maybe God was so tied up protecting the USS Texas
> >> > that he forgot to keep an eye on the USS Indianapolis after it
> >> > delivered the Fat Boy to Tinian Island. I guess those guys on the
> >> > Texas must have been much more powerful prayers than those on the
> >> > Indy, don't you think? In fact, those Texas crewmen must have even
> >> > drowned out the prayers of the Indy's sailor's as they were
> >> > screaming at God to save them from the sharks. The USS Texas had
> >> > some damn powerful prayer makers! It was that or God just liked the
> >> > USS Texas more than the did the USS Indianapolis.
> >>
> >> He was laughing when the ore carrier Edmund Fitzgerald went down.
> >
> > That nautical *******! I've often wondered what distracted God when
> > the Titanic slowly sunk. Now I think that he may have been having a
> > bit of intentional fun. The iceberg that the Titanic struck was
> > unusual because it was not white like most bergs, but had a clear look
> > caused by continuous melting. I think that God blew his hot breath on
> > that iceberg, let it refreeze, and then blew on it some more, until it
> > was clear and impossible to see from a speeding ship.
> >
> > God is one sick and devious diety!
>
> Jesus gets a hardon watching babies drown.

He picked that up from Dad running His old home movies of the Flood
story over and over. All powerful God drowns the entire population of
earth, except for one righteous alcoholic and family. Millions die
horribly by drowning, especially babies who cannot swim. Drunk's family
survives ordeal. Dad celebrates by getting schnockered with some monkeys
and by getting butt naked. Monkeys head home when drunk passes out. Sons
see naked butt and naturally help themselves to dad's bung. What Son of
an Omnipotent Deity wouldn't have some sexual maladjustments after
seeing that all His eternal life?

--
St. Jackanapes ~ Bearer of The One True Liver ~
Ordained Minister & Holy Saint of The Universal Life Church
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WEBSITE: http://www.jackanapes.ws | FORUM: http://www.voy.com/20630
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"The ejaculate from satan has the consistency and smell of emesis."
- Andrew B. Chung, MD/PhD