Getting Ready For Dinner

From: "Neil" >
alt.religion.christian.adventist,alt.dear.whitehou se,alt.teens.advice
Subject: Krista Marie McLean - November 18th 1981
Date: Sun, 16 Jun 2002 16:36:15 +0100

> > Maybe thats because we dont believe a word you
> > say perhaps if after 14 years of work you have
> > no believers its time to call it a day? And
> > something tells me insulting those who you wish
> > to convince probably isnt doing you any favours.
> > If anyone is worthless its you your the one
> > whose wasted 14 years of your life on this weird
> > crusade of yours whilst everyone else has been
> > getting on with and enjoying theirs perhaps its
> > time you did the same.

Similarly my parents never thought I had anything to say that was worth
while either, mom wanted me to be a doctor like uncle Peter Elloway. Uncle
Peter Elloway practiced family medicine in Los Angeles to blacks and hated
blacks, he drove his new Cadillac up to Saskatoon each summer and freeloaded
off of Sam, ate Sam's food and drank Sam's booze, and told us all stories
about dirty black people. I quickly determined that I did not want to be a
doctor, like uncle Peter. Ruby did not like my U of S anthropology and
sociology texts and eventually she got them to be stored in a box in the
garage. I wanted an old car, I was 17 years old in 1974 and had saved enough
to buy one, I saw a 1937 or 1938 Buick or Oldsmobile coupe being offered for
sale for around $700 on 7th Street (near Preston) and Sam took the
initiative to take me there and see it. While looking at it together, Sam
said in a gruff voice "You will never get king pins for it!!!" and basically
ordered me not to buy it (Sam only took me there to prevent me from
purchasing it). Then one of the neighbors of Sam's parent's (near Kinley)
said to me "Oh, you are Annie's grandson!!!" and with that she sold me a
1940 Chev sedan, the engine was seized, but the body wasn't rusted and the
interior was nearly mint (I remember the dash looking factory new and the
upholstery to be without tears). The neighbor charged me $50 for the car, I
towed it into Sam's backyard at 202 Ave U North. Less than a week later and
in my absence, Sam sold the car for the $50, I came home and it was gone.
Sam said that he did not want junk cluttering up his back yard and never
gave me an opportunity to store the car elsewhere. I brought home a 1952
Studebaker coupe, and again rather than encourage me to complete a project,
Sam announced that it was in need of a water pump, said that I would never
be able to get a water pump for it, and he ordered me to sell it. And they
order me to stay at home in the evenings to answer phone calls from people
responding to the ads in the paper, I would be forced to have to listen to
Sam and Ruby bark at me and at one another, I would be forced to sell
whatever it was they ordered me to sell, and I would sell at a loss in order
to get out of the house.

At about the same time that Sam sold my 1940 Chev, Sam sold his coin
collection for scrap silver. I had my own coin collection that I was trying
to build, and Sam sold his many old Canadian coins for scrap without giving
me the opportunity to aquire his coins so I could build upon my own
collection. Sam had Canadian coins dating back to the 1880's and 1890's, he
allowed me to see these coins a handful of times while I was growing up,
then he sold them for scrap. A few years before that I wanted some model
rockets, Sam refused to sign the document allowing me to buy the engines, so
the rockets were useless. And before that I wanted a toy train, so Sam gets
me a toy train for a Christmas (use of God's name in vain) present, but Sam
riveted the train tracks onto a large heavy board and into a permanent
figure eight, thereby taking away my freedom to arrange the tracks into
different configurations. Sam and Ruby together condemned most of my
interests. My brother Randal was lucky, he was allowed to learn music (the
parents ordered him to play an accordion and he absolutely hated it).

I tried to hold onto other old cars and whatever other projects or
interests in my life, but together my parents condemned my interests and
ordered me to sell valuables (to sell things that were precious to me). They
would not respect me as an individual, Ruby for example ordered me
repeatedly to sell my bus (while Sam would never raise a finger to help me
with it in any way), I tried to stand my ground and had to listen to Ruby
harp on and on about that bus nearly every day for years, saying "Sell the
bus!!! Sell the bus!!! Sell the bus!!!" Eventually I got full time
employment in Whitecourt Alberta, and in my absence Sam sold the bus for
$1000, but the Cummins V6 diesel engine was worth more than that. It is hard
to proceed with and develop interests when the people around you continually
shoot down your interests. I bet that Sam sold my 1940 Chev to one of his
alcoholic friends, perhaps to a fellow alcoholic police officer.

Eventually Sam's and Ruby's friends were irritated by my criticisms of
their churches, they did not like to hear me say that the Egyptian obelisks
on the roofs of their churches were representations of penises, they did not
like to hear me say that their churches were censoring Scriptural references
to cannibalism, and Ruby or both of my parents signed orders to bring even
more horrors into my life.

I was working in Whitecourt in 1987 (I had full time employment as a
Social Worker). I would have to endure long distance phone calls from Ruby,
telling me to sell my bus. Finally in 1987, while working in Whitecourt, Sam
sold the bus for $1000 (less than the engine was worth), to recoup the $1000
he sent me when I was attending school in Montreal, it was good to be in
Montreal and away from the family. And Sam and Ruby visited me in
Whitecourt, they argued and ordered and Sam assaulted me, after which my job
performance suffered. I lost my job and returned to Saskatoon in 1988 and my
parents had me arrested under the mental health act. Ruby would then come to
the psychiatric ward and bring me some new clothes, and exclaim how much
better I was now (now that my head was pounding in pain). My parents often
gamble away amounts of money approaching or exceeding $1000, an amount like
$1000 is not a big issue to them. After repeatedly ordering me to sell
vehicles, Ruby gambled her savings and her own car away, now she is left
without wheels of her own. Sam always promised to help me get established in
life, he frequently told me to forget about any car I owned or wanted to
purchase and saying that he would get me a nice car some day. Eventually
Sam's mother Annie sold her Dodge Rampage (a newer and economical vehicle)
to strangers on monthly installments, and 80-year-old Annie had to go
repeatedly to the people's home and try to collect her monthly payment (no
relative of mine ever offered me such a deal). Grandpa Bill Kabatoff was
like his son Sam, and did not want me parking a vehicle at the farm.

I was living on my own and was told to get rid of my cat, year after year
Ruby pressured me to get rid of my cat, and then cats. Once after a 6 week
torture session at the U of S, Sam picked me up, and soon after picked my
last remaining cat up, and delivered her to the SPCA to be put down. So much
for Namur, a true friend in my life.

Ruby would not allow me to go out in the evenings and associate with
people in high school, people who phoned for me would be given an
interrogation over the phone and were unlikely to attempt to contact me
again. She was angry that I would get a passport and a post office box, she
tried in vain for me to cancel my post office box, and would never tell
people looking for me what my post office box number is so they could
contact me. Ruby would let me pick the weeds in her garden, stir the meals
and wash the dishes, but would never allow me to sow any seeds of my own nor
teach me how to prepare a meal. Ruby hung pictures of herself in my bedroom
and would not allow me to put my own pictures on the wall, she is such an
ignorant God-damned shit (and continues to be so). And Ruby has a small
amount of farm land that she rents out. Over the years Ruby would tell me
and my brother how this land would always stay in the family, but I don't
exactly know where the precious little plot of land is, for once when I was
very young it was pointed out to me while I was seated in the back seat of
the family car and have never been allowed to step foot on it. Graham Taylor
now farms Ruby's land, and she treats him like her true son.

I renewed contact with my parents in 2001. Sam got a hip replacement in
2001 and traded in his late 1990's Ford Crown Victoria towards a van, so it
is easier for him to get in and out of the vehicle. Sam (who often ordered
me not to buy whatever vehicle and who repeatedly told me that he would some
day help me get a nice car), told me that he really got nothing in trade for
the Crown Victoria. My bicycle was stolen 3 years ago and now Sam keeps
offering me his mountain bike hanging in the garage. As a matter of
principle, I let his bike continue to hang. On December 14th 2001 Ruby said,
"You don't like Christmas so I will give this to you now," and she reached
under her decorated tree (pagan fertility symbol) and gave me a box to open.
There was a sweater inside (how I hate wearing sweaters) and I declined it.
Also at that time Ruby said that she was always giving things to my cousins
(Graham Taylor married one of them) and it was time that she gave something
to her own children, and she showed me two tiny silver chains and said one
was for me and one was for my brother. I took one of the chains (there is
perhaps more silver in a 25 cent piece), and I don't wear it as I don't wear
silver, and I don't want anything from my mother hanging around my neck. I
am so sorry I renewed contact with my parents in 2001.

Then on December 24th 2001 I was visiting with my brother and his wife at
Sam's and Ruby's house, it was late and I ended up spending the night with
them. Then in the morning of December 25th Ruby presents me with two boxes,
each containing sweaters, and one was the sweater that I refused 11 days
earlier. She suggested and suggested and then strongly suggested that I wear
the brown one as we were goink out for dinner to the McCrea's. I should have
taken scissors to it right then and there, but instead I put on Ruby's
sweater and off we went to see the McCrea and Taylor kids get their
presents. Most every Christmas my parents would take me to Struan where I
would see my first cousins get nice presents from their parents, now I was
to be taken (while wearing another one of Ruby's sweaters) to see these
first cousins of mine give nice and thoughtful presents to their kids. While
having dinner at The McCrea's, I sat next to Graham Taylor and showed him
the sweater Ruby gave me, and he just smirked.

Daryl Shawn Kabatoff
Box 7134
Saskatoon Saskatchewan
Canada
S7K 4J1