Hi,
It's me the ocassional poster, mostly lurker, vegetarian with a
junk-food/fast-food addict husband who was recently diagnosed with high
blood pressure. He's only 47, it runs in his family and it's going to
be the death of me, trying to find and cook foods that emulate junk
food. Argghhhh; I need a place to vent and I'm not sure if it's the
marriage newsgroup I need of this food group. You're less
argumentative here, so I'm posting here.

Does anyone know if the roasted chickens at costco are laden with salt?


Okay, here is what he likes (don't worry, it's a short list)
Chicken ( I'd like to buy it cooked since I don't like even touching
raw chicken...gives me the gag reflex :-)
Salad: lettuce, carrots, garbanzo beans/red kidney beans and ranch or
blue cheese dressing (vinagrette is his 2nd choice
Asparagus as long as they are not over cooked
Chili as long as there are no tomatoes
Broccoli as long as it's raw and not too much
He buys his fruit (thank god, or I'd probably buy the wrong sized
apple!!!)

Honestly, I've been at it with him for two weeks, trying to cook for
him, shop for him and help him "get it" that he cannot go out to eat
every day and avoid the salt that he so desperately needs to stop
eating.

Intellectually, I know that I need to let go of how he eats and just
let it be. BUT...and it's a big but, here's the deal. As some of you
know, I was diagnosed with thyroid cancer 11 months ago. If that
wasn't enough, my son, 28 years old, was recently diagnosed with
friggin Bladder Cancer. He was raised on the healthiest diet and all
of my adult years were spent eating very healthily. Yet in 11 months,
both my son and I were dx'd with two different forms of cancer. What
is frustrating me is how healthily we ate and our cancers have NOTHING
to do with diet. My husband's dx, on the other hand, CAN be controlled
with diet. It's infuriating me that something that he CAN control is
being taken so lightly by him.

OKay, end of rant.

If anyone here has this problem (either with a spouse) or has it
yourself, please share any websites with recipes or any of your own
recipes that have any of the above listed things that Mr. Picky will
eat. If I could emulate Taco Bell, Kentucky Fried Chicken or Burger
King; his dream would come true. From where I stand, he is damn lucky
that he got this wake up call before a heart attack and is being given
a golden opportunity to avoid meds.

Help please. Any attacks on how I feel will only make me cry. I mean
it. I ready to burst into tears right now :-(

Thanks in advance; you guys have always been such a great group the few
times that I've posted here.

Bless all of you (well, the nice ones :-)
At least I still have a sense of humor even with tears coming out of my
eyes.

tofuqueen wrote:
......snip

> Does anyone know if the roasted chickens at costco are laden with
> salt?

The skin will most certainly be. If the chickens are the ones they stock in
their meat case, then the meat will be fine. However, they may use chicken
that has been prepared with injection solutions to keep the meat moist,
which would contain sodium.

........snip

> Help please. Any attacks on how I feel will only make me cry. I mean
> it. I ready to burst into tears right now :-(

Dealing with obstinate personalities, especially when they're attached to
someone you love, is horribly frustrating. You can't be blamed for how upset
you are feeling. Here's a virtual hankie :-)

At this point, your husband is dealing with a 'potential' medical harm.....
as far as his thinking goes. He knows that he has high blood pressure, but
he doesn't *feel* any different, which means that he's still not completely
convinced that bad things are actually going to happen to him. Without the
anxieties of an in-your-face, symptomatic, I-feel-ill sickness, there is
little motivation to change something that is very comforting to him: his
food habits.

This is a common phenomenon to those diagnosed early with degenerative
conditions like high blood pressure, high triglycerides, high cholesterol,
early diabetes, etc..

Your husband has habits, and may even be considered addicted (in the
politically correct use of the term), to the fast foods, junk foods, and
other foods that he regularly consumes. In a sense, he has to not only deal
with his medical condition, but also these 'addictions'. THESE ARE SEPERATE
ISSUES TO YOUR HUSBAND. Both issues are interconnected, but he has to come
to terms with each issue as distinct changes to his life.

You are obviously a caring wife. He is not willing to give in to your
concerns. The fact that he is reluctant to change his life is not a direct
reflection about how much he cares for you. But you don't see it that way;
in your mind, he should be willing to change his behavior RIGHT NOW if he
really cared about you and your family.

You and your husband need three things to deal with his condition:

1. A counselor. A third party can help open the lines of communication in a
healthy fashion. It can help your husband understand the realities of the
situation regarding his health and long term goals. It can help him
understand just how hurt and scared you are. It can help you understand his
thinking. It can also give you tools needed to keep you healthy with regard
to the stress you are experiencing.

2. A registered dietician. A consultation here is almost mandatory, given
the situation you've described. This will help you and your husband. You
need a plan, resources, specific knowledge about foods and their effects on
his blood pressure, what the real concerns are vs. what you think the
concerns are regarding foods, and inspiration on tasty food prep.

3. Acceptance and adherence to blood pressure medication protocols.
Regardless of how negative you feel about medicines and long-term use, they
can prolong your husband's life. It ain't ideal, but thank God medicine
exists. If you are negative about your husband needing medication, then it
will rub off on him. Don't make the mistake of looking at his medicine as a
compounded negative on top of his high blood pressure. Taking medication is
not a failure of a person to live a healthy life; it is not a black mark of
sinful eating. Medication, when used judiciously, is meant to keep
degenerative effects of blood pressure at bay, or to minimize any damage
that it can cause. Medication is an ally.

Your husband will come around. He has time. Please enjoy him for who he is
right now and let go of your disapproval and disappointment.

You have no control of his habits, TQ. You don't need to take on the stress
about his bad eating habits. If you have any obligation, it is to offer
palatable wholesome choices away from the foods that he is hooked on. Once
you get the real scoop on foods from the dietician, you can let your husband
know that you will no longer enable his bad choices. You will fix good and
tasty foods, but you are not going to stress out trying to mimic fast food.
Through your counselor, you can work out the means to let him know,
lovingly, that you are not his mommy. That he is a big boy. That you will
not try to mimic the thing that he is 'hooked' on... that you ain't going to
develop the fast food version of Near Beer. Alcoholics can't have booze, and
he can't look to you to cure his fast food addiction. All of that can be
done in a positive and pleasant and non-judgemental way.

Be good to yourself, TQ; I do hope things will work out well. Don't go for
perfection, it's too stressful.

--
Dave
www.davebbq.com

Dave Bugg wrote:
> tofuqueen wrote:
> .....snip


Thanks for your post; all of your ideas were good ones. For what it's
worth; I"m not the one against meds, he is. He won't go see his GP
until he loses weight and has had a month to wean himself off of icky
foods because he's afraid that GP will put him on meds. I have NOTHING
against the meds. I can think of one reason why he'd be against
them....I've heard of one "male" side effect and I"m guessing he's not
ready for that one. It's not top on my list of priorities at this
point so I don't care.

Thanks again for responding Dave.

TQ

tofuqueen wrote:

> ..... I can think of one reason why he'd be
> against them....I've heard of one "male" side effect and I"m guessing
> he's not ready for that one. It's not top on my list of priorities
> at this point so I don't care.

That can be disconcerting for any guy. However, that is not very frequent
side effect, and is seen mostly within specific categories of BP meds, not
all of them. I used Cozaar (50mg) for quite a while, and had no side effects
whatsoever.

> Thanks again for responding Dave.

You're welcome. I'm sorry if I mistook some of the specifics of your
concerns. I don't know anything about this website, but it has some online
chat groups and other info. that may be useful. As with all things internet,
YMMV.
http://www.healthcentral.com/high-bl...rt-groups.html

--
Dave
www.davebbq.com

On 15 Jan 2007 12:10:34 -0800, "tofuqueen" > wrote:

>
>Dave Bugg wrote:
>> tofuqueen wrote:
>> .....snip
>
>
>Thanks for your post; all of your ideas were good ones. For what it's
>worth; I"m not the one against meds, he is. He won't go see his GP
>until he loses weight and has had a month to wean himself off of icky
>foods because he's afraid that GP will put him on meds. I have NOTHING
>against the meds. I can think of one reason why he'd be against
>them....I've heard of one "male" side effect and I"m guessing he's not
>ready for that one. It's not top on my list of priorities at this
>point so I don't care.
>
>Thanks again for responding Dave.
>
>TQ

Dave gave you a lot of good information, but I would like to add,
uncontrolled hyper tension leads to E.D.
If he will not take care of him self he will no longer get it up.
That scare was enough for me to take my meds.

In article . com>,
"tofuqueen" > wrote:


> a golden opportunity to avoid meds.
>
> Help please. Any attacks on how I feel will only make me cry. I mean
> it. I ready to burst into tears right now :-(

Sorry for your pain. I've been on meds for decades. They have few side
effects. For some people, reducing the sodium will reduce the blood
pressure. For others, it doesn't help. It is sure worth trying, though.

High blood pressure is a killer. He needs to do whatever is needed to
get it down.

How high is his pressure? What does his doctor advise?

Pan Ohco wrote:

> Dave gave you a lot of good information, but I would like to add,
> uncontrolled hyper tension leads to E.D.
> If he will not take care of him self he will no longer get it up.
> That scare was enough for me to take my meds.

Glad you made that point, Pan. And unlike medications, which can be changed
or adjusted should ED be an issue, blood-pressure caused ED is often
permanent due to damage to the blood vessels.

--
Dave
www.davebbq.com

tofuqueen wrote:
>
> Hi,
> It's me the ocassional poster, mostly lurker, vegetarian with a
> junk-food/fast-food addict husband who was recently diagnosed with high
> blood pressure. He's only 47, it runs in his family and it's going to
> be the death of me, trying to find and cook foods that emulate junk
> food. Argghhhh; I need a place to vent and I'm not sure if it's the
> marriage newsgroup I need of this food group. You're less
> argumentative here, so I'm posting here.

The problem is quite simple. You two need to split up. You have
incompatible diets. My brother in law when through the same think when he
was married to a health food nazi which drove him to fast food restaurants
and junk food where he could enjoy some peace and quiet.

- you get a gag reflex touching raw chicken
- he likes only a half dozen things, one of them being a tomato based dish
but he doesn't like tomatoes
- he has to buy his own fruit because you might buy the wrong size.


Hold it. Ignore the suggestion to split up. You are perfect for each
other.

tofuqueen wrote:

> Hi,
> It's me the ocassional poster, mostly lurker, vegetarian with a
> junk-food/fast-food addict husband who was recently diagnosed with
> high blood pressure. He's only 47, it runs in his family and it's
> going to be the death of me, trying to find and cook foods that
> emulate junk food. Argghhhh; I need a place to vent and I'm not sure
> if it's the marriage newsgroup I need of this food group. You're less
> argumentative here, so I'm posting here.
>
> Does anyone know if the roasted chickens at costco are laden with
> salt?
>
Check the label. But they probably are.



--
Dan Goodman
All political parties die at last of swallowing their own lies.
John Arbuthnot (1667-1735), Scottish writer, physician.
Journal http://dsgood.livejournal.com
Links http://del.icio.us/dsgood
Political http://www.dailykos.com/user/dsgood

On 15 Jan 2007 10:19:49 -0800, "tofuqueen" > wrote:

>Help please. Any attacks on how I feel will only make me cry. I mean
>it. I ready to burst into tears right now :-(

Oh, man.... my sympathy to you! It's one thing to have cancer
yourself, but watching a loved one go through it is even worse. I
think you should talk to your doctor about some mild medication to
help get back on track. This is one of those times when it's awfully
hard to just suck it in and soldier on.

I completely understand your frustration with your husband. I'm
fighting that battle only with the purines that cause gout. "NO, you
can't even have a bite of that, Honey. Yes, it's been 3 days since
you've eaten something bad for you and you still feel good, but you
need to wait!"

For Junk food recipes try http://www.copykat.com/ You'll have to
figure out the salt content yourself though.

As far as your hubby is concerned.... take the salt shaker off the
table and *you* control the salt contents. There are lots of
different things you can put on the table now to enrich flavor which
includes flavored peppers. Since he's a salt addict, I wouldn't cut
him off all at once... cut back gradually and before he knows it -
he'll be off salt.

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/dash-diet/HI00020
http://www.nhlbi.nih.gov/health/publ...roduction.html
http://www.wegmans.com/eatwelllivewe...ealth/dash.asp
http://www.cnn.com/HEALTH/library/NU/00585.html

I think your hubby needs to learn how to cook. Does your local Y
offer cooking classes? If you look on the web, various popular diets
include the sodium content for each recipe. It might be easier to
just use those recipes.
http://diet.ivillage.com/plans/topics/0,,4s3z,00.html
http://seniorhealth.about.com/cs/nut...beachrev_2.htm
http://findarticles.com/p/articles/m...3/ai_114749463
http://webcenters.netscape.compuserv...asydietdinners

Hugz

--
See return address to reply by email

Please join my team in the fight against cancer.
http://www.grid.org/services/teams/t...3-AEB0DD18A6CE
"Dave Bugg" > wrote in message
...
> tofuqueen wrote:
> .....snip
>
>> Does anyone know if the roasted chickens at costco are laden with
>> salt?
>
> The skin will most certainly be. If the chickens are the ones they stock
> in their meat case, then the meat will be fine. However, they may use
> chicken that has been prepared with injection solutions to keep the meat
> moist, which would contain sodium.
>
> .......snip
>
>> Help please. Any attacks on how I feel will only make me cry. I mean
>> it. I ready to burst into tears right now :-(
>
> Dealing with obstinate personalities, especially when they're attached to
> someone you love, is horribly frustrating. You can't be blamed for how
> upset you are feeling. Here's a virtual hankie :-)
>
> At this point, your husband is dealing with a 'potential' medical
> harm..... as far as his thinking goes. He knows that he has high blood
> pressure, but he doesn't *feel* any different, which means that he's still
> not completely convinced that bad things are actually going to happen to
> him. Without the anxieties of an in-your-face, symptomatic, I-feel-ill
> sickness, there is little motivation to change something that is very
> comforting to him: his food habits.
>
> This is a common phenomenon to those diagnosed early with degenerative
> conditions like high blood pressure, high triglycerides, high cholesterol,
> early diabetes, etc..
>
> Your husband has habits, and may even be considered addicted (in the
> politically correct use of the term), to the fast foods, junk foods, and
> other foods that he regularly consumes. In a sense, he has to not only
> deal with his medical condition, but also these 'addictions'. THESE ARE
> SEPERATE ISSUES TO YOUR HUSBAND. Both issues are interconnected, but he
> has to come to terms with each issue as distinct changes to his life.
>
> You are obviously a caring wife. He is not willing to give in to your
> concerns. The fact that he is reluctant to change his life is not a direct
> reflection about how much he cares for you. But you don't see it that way;
> in your mind, he should be willing to change his behavior RIGHT NOW if he
> really cared about you and your family.
>
> You and your husband need three things to deal with his condition:
>
> 1. A counselor. A third party can help open the lines of communication in
> a healthy fashion. It can help your husband understand the realities of
> the situation regarding his health and long term goals. It can help him
> understand just how hurt and scared you are. It can help you understand
> his thinking. It can also give you tools needed to keep you healthy with
> regard to the stress you are experiencing.
>
> 2. A registered dietician. A consultation here is almost mandatory,
> given the situation you've described. This will help you and your husband.
> You need a plan, resources, specific knowledge about foods and their
> effects on his blood pressure, what the real concerns are vs. what you
> think the concerns are regarding foods, and inspiration on tasty food
> prep.
>
> 3. Acceptance and adherence to blood pressure medication protocols.
> Regardless of how negative you feel about medicines and long-term use,
> they can prolong your husband's life. It ain't ideal, but thank God
> medicine exists. If you are negative about your husband needing
> medication, then it will rub off on him. Don't make the mistake of looking
> at his medicine as a compounded negative on top of his high blood
> pressure. Taking medication is not a failure of a person to live a healthy
> life; it is not a black mark of sinful eating. Medication, when used
> judiciously, is meant to keep degenerative effects of blood pressure at
> bay, or to minimize any damage that it can cause. Medication is an ally.
>
> Your husband will come around. He has time. Please enjoy him for who he is
> right now and let go of your disapproval and disappointment.
>
> You have no control of his habits, TQ. You don't need to take on the
> stress about his bad eating habits. If you have any obligation, it is to
> offer palatable wholesome choices away from the foods that he is hooked
> on. Once you get the real scoop on foods from the dietician, you can let
> your husband know that you will no longer enable his bad choices. You will
> fix good and tasty foods, but you are not going to stress out trying to
> mimic fast food. Through your counselor, you can work out the means to let
> him know, lovingly, that you are not his mommy. That he is a big boy. That
> you will not try to mimic the thing that he is 'hooked' on... that you
> ain't going to develop the fast food version of Near Beer. Alcoholics
> can't have booze, and he can't look to you to cure his fast food
> addiction. All of that can be done in a positive and pleasant and
> non-judgemental way.
>
> Be good to yourself, TQ; I do hope things will work out well. Don't go
> for perfection, it's too stressful.
>
> --
> Dave
> www.davebbq.com
Wow Dave!
That has to be the most informative and helpful post I have seen here for
many a moon.
Well done.

Dave Bugg wrote:
> tofuqueen wrote:
>
>> ..... I can think of one reason why he'd be
>> against them....I've heard of one "male" side effect and I"m guessing
>> he's not ready for that one. It's not top on my list of priorities
>> at this point so I don't care.
>
> That can be disconcerting for any guy. However, that is not very frequent
> side effect, and is seen mostly within specific categories of BP meds, not
> all of them. I used Cozaar (50mg) for quite a while, and had no side effects
> whatsoever.

Not uncommon with beta blockers at all, and many men are non compliant
with their prescribed meds for just this reason.

Pan Ohco wrote:

> Dave gave you a lot of good information, but I would like to add,
> uncontrolled hyper tension leads to E.D.
> If he will not take care of him self he will no longer get it up.
> That scare was enough for me to take my meds.
>
....and strokes! The image of a patient after a debilitating stroke in
diapers and drooling could be a bit of shock therapy and inducement to
take the meds regularly, I think? Renal failure from untreated
hypertension is another ugly risk....

Ken Davey wrote:

> Wow Dave!
> That has to be the most informative and helpful post I have seen here
> for many a moon.
> Well done.

Thanks, Ken. There havebeen some other great posts as well. Hopefully this
will give TQ some things to help.

--
Dave
www.davebbq.com

Dave Smith wrote:
> tofuqueen wrote:
> >
> > Hi,
> > It's me the ocassional poster, mostly lurker, vegetarian with a
> > junk-food/fast-food addict husband who was recently diagnosed with high
> > blood pressure. He's only 47, it runs in his family and it's going to
> > be the death of me, trying to find and cook foods that emulate junk
> > food. Argghhhh; I need a place to vent and I'm not sure if it's the
> > marriage newsgroup I need of this food group. You're less
> > argumentative here, so I'm posting here.
>
> The problem is quite simple. You two need to split up.

That's always an option however we do have a child who needs to be
considered into the equation.

You have
> incompatible diets.

Oh really? Honestly Dave, if our only issue was that he eats meat and
I don't; we'd be in great shape. Vegetarianism is not the issue. It's
the junk food addiction that is the issue.

My brother in law when through the same think when he
> was married to a health food nazi which drove him to fast food restaurants
> and junk food where he could enjoy some peace and quiet.
>

I won't take the rap for this; it's his momma who guided him in that
direction. Eating out with his family is quite the treat, let me tell
you. I avoid it like the plague.

> - you get a gag reflex touching raw chicken
> - he likes only a half dozen things, one of them being a tomato based dish
> but he doesn't like tomatoes

LOL! Put that way, it really is funny :-)

> - he has to buy his own fruit because you might buy the wrong size.

Yep, I've been told that I picked bananas that were too small (and so
were the apples). As I understand it, very large peices of fruit are
considered to be at least two servings, so my attempt was to find the
ones that were one serving. Silly me.
>
> Hold it. Ignore the suggestion to split up. You are perfect for each
> other.

Thanks! Have you ever thought about becoming a marriage counselor?
Please don't! But you did give me a laugh, thanks, I needed one today.

To the rest of your who posted extremely helpful information; bless
your hearts. I really and truly appreciate it. He found out about his
blood pressure from one of those checkyourhealth places that was
required through his job. They told him that his BP was 170/100
(while he was lying down). They told him to go to his GP to get
medicine, which he has not done as of yet. He said that he'll change
his diet first. I'm impatient and want him to change it all
immediately. He said that it won't "stick" if he does it all at once.
We just think differently. If someone told me today that I'd get rid
of this thyroid cancer if I ate a peice of meat each day; you can bet
your life, I'd switch over and eat a peice of meat each day. I just
have to keep reminding myself that he responds to things intellectually
and I respond to things emotionally. There are pros and cons in both
responses.

I bought him RAW chicken breasts today and they're baking with garlic
and other seasonings. I'm baking tofu and veggies at the same time
WITH soy sauce for DD and I. I hope I did it right today :-) And
thanks for being such a sweet group; I mean it.

I found this quote a few minutes ago and thought I'd sha

"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole
staircase."
~ Martin Luther King, Jr.

"tofuqueen" > wrote

>> - he has to buy his own fruit because you might buy the wrong size.
>
> Yep, I've been told that I picked bananas that were too small (and so
> were the apples). As I understand it, very large peices of fruit are
> considered to be at least two servings, so my attempt was to find the
> ones that were one serving. Silly me.

They keep bugging us to have more servings of fruit, I don't think
the big banana will harm him.

> medicine, which he has not done as of yet. He said that he'll change
> his diet first.

I don't blame him. You know, that Prevention Magazine seemed
to be about healthful eating/etc to get people off medication. That
seemed like an overriding theme, though I haven't read that magazine
in a long time. Maybe check out an issue.

> I'm impatient and want him to change it all
> immediately. He said that it won't "stick" if he does it all at once.

Yeah, I could see it's bad enough it's scary news, he might just want
to absorb it before being bombarded about it.

> I bought him RAW chicken breasts today and they're baking with garlic
> and other seasonings. I'm baking tofu and veggies at the same time
> WITH soy sauce for DD and I. I hope I did it right today :-) And
> thanks for being such a sweet group; I mean it.
>
> I found this quote a few minutes ago and thought I'd sha
>
> "Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole
> staircase."

Wait, I think I saw that in one of those Raider's movies ...

(smile) You really have a lot to deal with. I wish you nothing but
the best, don't go crazy trying to watch everything he eats, it's not
helping you get better. He needs to step it up, but give him some
room, I think. Just my opinion. Let him take charge of what he
eats, maybe he'll get into making his own good choices.

nancy

On 15 Jan 2007 10:19:49 -0800, "tofuqueen" > wrote:

>Hi,
>It's me the ocassional poster, mostly lurker, vegetarian with a
>junk-food/fast-food addict husband who was recently diagnosed with high
>blood pressure. He's only 47, it runs in his family and it's going to
>be the death of me, trying to find and cook foods that emulate junk
>food. Argghhhh; I need a place to vent and I'm not sure if it's the
>marriage newsgroup I need of this food group. You're less
>argumentative here, so I'm posting here.

Hee. Less argumentative, huh? Now I'm wondering if I should check out
that group or not.

>Honestly, I've been at it with him for two weeks, trying to cook for
>him, shop for him and help him "get it" that he cannot go out to eat
>every day and avoid the salt that he so desperately needs to stop
>eating.

Do you usually do most of the cooking?

>Intellectually, I know that I need to let go of how he eats and just
>let it be. BUT...and it's a big but, here's the deal. As some of you
>know, I was diagnosed with thyroid cancer 11 months ago. If that
>wasn't enough, my son, 28 years old, was recently diagnosed with
>friggin Bladder Cancer. He was raised on the healthiest diet and all
>of my adult years were spent eating very healthily. Yet in 11 months,
>both my son and I were dx'd with two different forms of cancer. What
>is frustrating me is how healthily we ate and our cancers have NOTHING
>to do with diet. My husband's dx, on the other hand, CAN be controlled
>with diet. It's infuriating me that something that he CAN control is
>being taken so lightly by him.

But the flipside of "he CAN control it" is that it's in his power to
choose not to. Sad, but true. You can't make him care about his
health. You can do your best to cook things that will promote his
health, but you can't make him care, or make him change his ways.
Would he consider going to a nutrition class? Most insurance will
cover it if there's been what's considered a diet-related diagnosis.
My ex really got a lot out of her diabetes class, and took a lot of
responsibility for her own health after taking the class.

>If anyone here has this problem (either with a spouse) or has it
>yourself, please share any websites with recipes or any of your own
>recipes that have any of the above listed things that Mr. Picky will
>eat. If I could emulate Taco Bell, Kentucky Fried Chicken or Burger
>King; his dream would come true.

:-) Anything you make -- tacos, fried chicken, burgers -- that's like those
places is bound to be lower in salt and additive, which is already a
good start. My taco seasoning is dead easy (1 teaspoon each chili
powder and cumin) and yet people always crave my tacos. Also, you can
make your own, for example, mayonnaise without added salt, and then
make his Thousand Island dressing with that. Buy salt-free canned
goods in place of the ones you already use. Make sure your chicken
hasn't been injected with "flavor solution". Buy the leanest ground
beef you can get away with. Stuff like that. I'd be happy to
brainstorm with you. I have had two partners in succession who've had
diabetes diagnoses, and I'm happy to say that both of them were able
to control it with diet and exercise, and James's diabetes has been
virtually reversed.

>Help please. Any attacks on how I feel will only make me cry. I mean
>it. I ready to burst into tears right now :-(

Of course you are. You're having a really truly rough year, you poor
thing.

serene
--
"I can't decide if I feel more like four ten-year-olds or ten four-year-olds." Laurie Anderson , on turning 40.

http://serenejournal.livejournal.com

In article . com>,
"tofuqueen" > wrote:


> required through his job. They told him that his BP was 170/100
> (while he was lying down). They told him to go to his GP to get
> medicine, which he has not done as of yet. He said that he'll change

Blood pressure varies. One reading isn't enough. Get a machine. They
are a few bucks at the drugstore. Get him in to the doctor. A reading
of 170/100 is a health hazard. Your daughter needs a father. He is at
risk.

In article . com>,
"tofuqueen" > wrote:

> Hi,
> It's me the ocassional poster, mostly lurker, vegetarian with a
> junk-food/fast-food addict husband who was recently diagnosed with high
> blood pressure. He's only 47, it runs in his family and it's going to
> be the death of me,

More likely the death of him.

> trying to find and cook foods that emulate junk
> food. Argghhhh; I need a place to vent and I'm not sure if it's the
> marriage newsgroup I need of this food group. You're less
> argumentative here, so I'm posting here.
>
> Does anyone know if the roasted chickens at costco are laden with salt?

Ever taste one? If they're anything like the ones at the local super,
I'd say yes. Whoops, you're a vegetarian. Guess not. Yeah, they're
nasty salty.
>
>
> Okay, here is what he likes (don't worry, it's a short list)
> Chicken ( I'd like to buy it cooked since I don't like even touching
> raw chicken...gives me the gag reflex :-)
> Salad: lettuce, carrots, garbanzo beans/red kidney beans and ranch or
> blue cheese dressing (vinagrette is his 2nd choice
> Asparagus as long as they are not over cooked
> Chili as long as there are no tomatoes
> Broccoli as long as it's raw and not too much
> He buys his fruit (thank god, or I'd probably buy the wrong sized
> apple!!!)

Jesus H. Sounds like my son-in-law, except he (SIL) is fussier.
>
> Honestly, I've been at it with him for two weeks, trying to cook for
> him, shop for him and help him "get it" that he cannot go out to eat
> every day and avoid the salt that he so desperately needs to stop
> eating.
>
> Intellectually, I know that I need to let go of how he eats and just
> let it be. BUT...and it's a big but, here's the deal. As some of you
> know, I was diagnosed with thyroid cancer 11 months ago. If that
> wasn't enough, my son, 28 years old, was recently diagnosed with
> friggin Bladder Cancer. He was raised on the healthiest diet and all
> of my adult years were spent eating very healthily. Yet in 11 months,
> both my son and I were dx'd with two different forms of cancer. What
> is frustrating me is how healthily we ate and our cancers have NOTHING
> to do with diet. My husband's dx, on the other hand, CAN be controlled
> with diet. It's infuriating me that something that he CAN control is
> being taken so lightly by him.
>
> OKay, end of rant.
>
> If anyone here has this problem (either with a spouse) or has it
> yourself, please share any websites with recipes or any of your own
> recipes that have any of the above listed things that Mr. Picky will
> eat. If I could emulate Taco Bell, Kentucky Fried Chicken or Burger
> King; his dream would come true. From where I stand, he is damn lucky
> that he got this wake up call before a heart attack and is being given
> a golden opportunity to avoid meds.
>
> Help please. Any attacks on how I feel will only make me cry. I mean
> it. I ready to burst into tears right now :-(

Has his doc sent him to a dietitian or a class? If not, look for one.
My medical clinic's education department offers all kinds of classes.
The one I took was $40 for two sessions. Well worth the money, I
thought.
>
> Thanks in advance; you guys have always been such a great group the few
> times that I've posted here.
>
> Bless all of you (well, the nice ones :-)
> At least I still have a sense of humor even with tears coming out of my
> eyes.

Come here. I'll give you a back, neck, and shoulder rub that will make
you feel better. You need to figure out how to keep your sanity while
your world is rocking. My services are highly sought. I'm sorry for
your plight; I hope you find a way to some peace.
--
-Barb, Mother Superior, HOSSSPoJ
http://web.mac.com/barbschaller - blahblahblog -
1/11/2007,Pork Tenderloin and Oven Roasted Potatoes
http://jamlady.eboard.com
http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/amytaylor

In article . com>,
"tofuqueen" > wrote:

> Dave Smith wrote:
> > tofuqueen wrote:
> > >
> > > Hi,
> > > It's me the ocassional poster, mostly lurker, vegetarian with a
> > > junk-food/fast-food addict husband who was recently diagnosed with high
> > > blood pressure.

And Mr. Smith had the grace to say:
> > The problem is quite simple. You two need to split up.

That's a really horseshit thing to say.

> > - you get a gag reflex touching raw chicken - he likes only a half
> > dozen things, one of them being a tomato based dish but he doesn't
> > like tomatoes

> LOL! Put that way, it really is funny :-)

I understand it completely. Rob will eat a lot of tomato-based things
-- but he doesn't eat tomatoes in recognizable form. Means more for me.
--
-Barb, Mother Superior, HOSSSPoJ
http://web.mac.com/barbschaller - blahblahblog -
1/11/2007,Pork Tenderloin and Oven Roasted Potatoes
http://jamlady.eboard.com
http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/amytaylor

On 15 Jan 2007 10:19:49 -0800, "tofuqueen" > wrote:

>Hi,
>It's me the ocassional poster, mostly lurker, vegetarian with a
>junk-food/fast-food addict husband who was recently diagnosed with high
>blood pressure. He's only 47, it runs in his family and it's going to
>be the death of me, trying to find and cook foods that emulate junk
>food. Argghhhh; I need a place to vent and I'm not sure if it's the
>marriage newsgroup I need of this food group. You're less
>argumentative here, so I'm posting here.
>
>Does anyone know if the roasted chickens at costco are laden with salt?
>
>
>Okay, here is what he likes (don't worry, it's a short list)
>Chicken ( I'd like to buy it cooked since I don't like even touching
>raw chicken...gives me the gag reflex :-)
>Salad: lettuce, carrots, garbanzo beans/red kidney beans and ranch or
>blue cheese dressing (vinagrette is his 2nd choice
>Asparagus as long as they are not over cooked
>Chili as long as there are no tomatoes
>Broccoli as long as it's raw and not too much
>He buys his fruit (thank god, or I'd probably buy the wrong sized
>apple!!!)
>
>Honestly, I've been at it with him for two weeks, trying to cook for
>him, shop for him and help him "get it" that he cannot go out to eat
>every day and avoid the salt that he so desperately needs to stop
>eating.
>
>Intellectually, I know that I need to let go of how he eats and just
>let it be. BUT...and it's a big but, here's the deal. As some of you
>know, I was diagnosed with thyroid cancer 11 months ago. If that
>wasn't enough, my son, 28 years old, was recently diagnosed with
>friggin Bladder Cancer. He was raised on the healthiest diet and all
>of my adult years were spent eating very healthily. Yet in 11 months,
>both my son and I were dx'd with two different forms of cancer. What
>is frustrating me is how healthily we ate and our cancers have NOTHING
>to do with diet. My husband's dx, on the other hand, CAN be controlled
>with diet. It's infuriating me that something that he CAN control is
>being taken so lightly by him.
>
>OKay, end of rant.
>
>If anyone here has this problem (either with a spouse) or has it
>yourself, please share any websites with recipes or any of your own
>recipes that have any of the above listed things that Mr. Picky will
>eat. If I could emulate Taco Bell, Kentucky Fried Chicken or Burger
>King; his dream would come true. From where I stand, he is damn lucky
>that he got this wake up call before a heart attack and is being given
>a golden opportunity to avoid meds.
>
>Help please. Any attacks on how I feel will only make me cry. I mean
>it. I ready to burst into tears right now :-(
>
>Thanks in advance; you guys have always been such a great group the few
>times that I've posted here.
>
>Bless all of you (well, the nice ones :-)
>At least I still have a sense of humor even with tears coming out of my
>eyes.

I highly recommend that you both have a look the DASH diet:

http://www.nhlbi.nih.gov/health/public/heart/hbp/dash/

Good luck

Melba's Jammin' wrote:
>
> > Dave Smith wrote:
> > > tofuqueen wrote:
> > > >
> > > > Hi,
> > > > It's me the ocassional poster, mostly lurker, vegetarian with a
> > > > junk-food/fast-food addict husband who was recently diagnosed with high
> > > > blood pressure.
>
> And Mr. Smith had the grace to say:
> > > The problem is quite simple. You two need to split up.

You didn't think she was serious did you?
If she was, the two of them are anal enough to indulge comically with
impunity.

>
> That's a really horseshit thing to say.
>
> > > - you get a gag reflex touching raw chicken - he likes only a half
> > > dozen things, one of them being a tomato based dish but he doesn't
> > > like tomatoes
>
> > LOL! Put that way, it really is funny :-)

Yeah, and he doesn't like her to buy bananas that are too big because......
she might put them somewhere a banana doesn't usually go?

>
> I understand it completely. Rob will eat a lot of tomato-based things
> -- but he doesn't eat tomatoes in recognizable form. Means more for me.

I trust that you noted that the list of things he likes was five items
long, raw broccoli, asparagus that isn't overcooked( two things that picky
eaters usually put near the top of things to avoid), chilli without
tomatoes ???? He probably doesn't want the peppers in there either. And
blue cheese dressing is one of the 5 things he likes.

If she was joking it was funny. If she was serious, they are a joke.

Serene > wrote:

>On 15 Jan 2007 10:19:49 -0800, "tofuqueen" > wrote:

>> What is frustrating me is how healthily we ate and our cancers
>> have NOTHING to do with diet. My husband's dx, on the other
>> hand, CAN be controlled with diet. It's infuriating me that
>> something that he CAN control is being taken so lightly by him.

> But the flipside of "he CAN control it" is that it's in his power to
> choose not to. Sad, but true. You can't make him care about his
> health. You can do your best to cook things that will promote his
> health, but you can't make him care, or make him change his ways.
> Would he consider going to a nutrition class? Most insurance will
> cover it if there's been what's considered a diet-related diagnosis.
> My ex really got a lot out of her diabetes class, and took a lot of
> responsibility for her own health after taking the class.

I question the notion that hypertension "can" be controlled by
diet. More accurately it "might" be controllable by diet. If
one is a sodium-sensitive hypertensive, then yes, but the odds
of that are under 20%. When first diagnosed with high blood
pressure I tried eating essentially zero sodium for a month,
and it made no difference, and this is typical.

A combination of improved diet and exercise, leading to better
physical condition, might also lower blood pressure, but
in this case as well it may make no difference, and if it does
the exercise component is far more important than the diet
component.

Discontinuing alcohol might also lower blood pressure. I found
that after six weeks of alcohol abstinence, I had to adjust my
BP meds because my diastolic pressure was routinely under 60.
But it was only a fractional difference, not a complete fix.

If your husband is typical, tofuqueen, the main thing and
possibly the only thing that will lower his BP is meds.
There are four common categories of such meds to choose from
and many more atypical ones and it is almost a certainty he can
find a combination that works without side effects. Any doctor
worth his salt can lead your husband through this process with
good results.

Steve

Steve Pope wrote:
>
>
> I question the notion that hypertension "can" be controlled by
> diet. More accurately it "might" be controllable by diet. If
> one is a sodium-sensitive hypertensive, then yes, but the odds
> of that are under 20%. When first diagnosed with high blood
> pressure I tried eating essentially zero sodium for a month,
> and it made no difference, and this is typical.

My BP was on the high side a few years ago. My diet has not changed much
but I started exercising regularly, an hour at the gym 4-5 days per week
and a hell of a lot of walking and bicycling. My BP is back to normal.


>

On 15 Jan 2007 12:10:34 -0800, "tofuqueen" > wrote:

>
>Dave Bugg wrote:
>> tofuqueen wrote:
>> .....snip
>
>
>Thanks for your post; all of your ideas were good ones. For what it's
>worth; I"m not the one against meds, he is. He won't go see his GP
>until he loses weight and has had a month to wean himself off of icky
>foods because he's afraid that GP will put him on meds. I have NOTHING
>against the meds. I can think of one reason why he'd be against
>them....I've heard of one "male" side effect and I"m guessing he's not
>ready for that one. It's not top on my list of priorities at this
>point so I don't care.

Tell him that if he takes the medicine he might not NEED to quit
eating salt altogether...

As for cooking chicken, I'd suggest that you buy skinless chicken
breasts or chicken tenders in bulk, and low-sodium chicken stock.
Bring the chicken home in a bag, upend the bag into a big baking dish
and pour the chicken stock over the top... then shove the dish into
the oven and let it bake/broil for about an hour before you even look
at it.
My mother couldn't stand raw meat when I was a kid so she'd force
herself to deal with it once every month or so and cook it all as soon
as possible, then freeze the cooked food for later.

On Tue, 16 Jan 2007 21:56:00 -0500, Karen AKA Kajikit
> wrote:

>My mother couldn't stand raw meat when I was a kid so she'd force
>herself to deal with it once every month or so and cook it all as soon
>as possible, then freeze the cooked food for later.

Tofuqueen should try using disposable gloves in the kitchen. My
daughter uses them, not because she can't stand the feel of raw
chicken but because her eczema is so bad that almost anything
irritates it.... even water.

--
See return address to reply by email

Dave Smith > wrote:

>Steve Pope wrote:

>> I question the notion that hypertension "can" be controlled by
>> diet. More accurately it "might" be controllable by diet. If
>> one is a sodium-sensitive hypertensive, then yes, but the odds
>> of that are under 20%. When first diagnosed with high blood
>> pressure I tried eating essentially zero sodium for a month,
>> and it made no difference, and this is typical.

>My BP was on the high side a few years ago. My diet has not changed much
>but I started exercising regularly, an hour at the gym 4-5 days per week
>and a hell of a lot of walking and bicycling. My BP is back to normal.

Yes, one of my contentions here is that if one is trying to
lower BP by means of lifestyle changes, exercise is far more
important than diet.

Steve
>
>>