Went to a wedding last PM, held in a very historic building. Way too few
seats for the assembled (never attended SRO nuptials before! LOL) but
the atmosphere and the sheer gorgeousness of the space helped soften
that blow. Luckily we had seats, although not the best. The groom is a
sweet man, a friend of my son's who recently returned from a year in the
desert.

Friends of the young couple did the food. Pretty simple, low cost stuff.
Veggie platters, cheeses, meat trays, mini rolls to make sandwiches,
meatballs (Nancy Young-grape jelly and chili sauce! I asked!! They were
actually pretty good. The only warm item on the table), and of course a
gorgeous bridal cake on one one side of the room, and the typical UGA
symbol grooms cake on a buffet on the other side of the room. Bakeries
around here must do at least 2 of those a week, LOL. The tables were
ornamented with floating candles, flowers and netting which looked nice
at night.

I so wanted to "fix" the buffet table for those folks. The large oval,
antique table was set with some items on both sides starting with the
plates (inplying two identical sides so folks could move down on either
side and not miss anything, but then they had the napkins only on one
side, and both platters of the meatballs on only one side. So people
were weaving in and out, and then having to go around the other side for
the meatballs.Someone just didn't think that one out. They used clear
plastic plates and utensils yet I have to say they were much nicer than
ones I've usually seen for sale in the store? I'm always torn about all
that trash in the landfills versus renting (with washing/transport)
which entails different energy use.

I gagged a bit when one woman came out to refill the large bread "cubes"
on the platter that held spinach dip held inside a gutted large round
loaf of pumpernickel bread and bread cubes around it. With her bare
hands she grabbed huge handfuls of the bread cubes from the replacement
platter and squeezed them into place on the serving platter, smashing as
needed to get them to mound and stay in place. In some cases ignorance
is bliss and even if she had to use her bare hands to maul the large
cubes, I would have preferred it to be out of my sight. Perhaps taken
back into the kitchen or rotating two platters on the serving table so
she could replenish out of view yet not leave the table without one
while the other was in the kitchen.

The open bar was in another room. The bar tender (owner of a liquor
store that does this service for hire) had a HUGE tip bowl out.
Terribly out of place, and if I were the parents of the bride I would
have been very embarrassed and upset by this tacky bit of extortion.
Good wines (I enjoyed a lovely Spatlasse from Germany) but for the mixed
drinks it was all bottom shelf liquor which might matter to some? I
didn't try the punch in the fountain but it looked to be a citrus punch.
The bridal party seemed to favor bottled beer, LOL.

All in all though, it was still a lovely wedding.

"Goomba38" > wrote in message
. ..
>
> I gagged a bit when one woman came out to refill the large bread "cubes"
> on the platter that held spinach dip held inside a gutted large round loaf
> of pumpernickel bread and bread cubes around it. With her bare hands she
> grabbed huge handfuls of the bread cubes from the replacement platter and
> squeezed them into place on the serving platter, smashing as needed to get
> them to mound and stay in place. In some cases ignorance is bliss and even
> if she had to use her bare hands to maul the large cubes, I would have
> preferred it to be out of my sight. Perhaps taken back into the kitchen or
> rotating two platters on the serving table so she could replenish out of
> view yet not leave the table without one while the other was in the
> kitchen.



That might have been a proper instance for the thoughtful teaching moment.
Dee Dee <veg>

Dee.Dee wrote:
> "Goomba38" > wrote in message
> . ..
>> I gagged a bit when one woman came out to refill the large bread "cubes"
>> on the platter that held spinach dip held inside a gutted large round loaf
>> of pumpernickel bread and bread cubes around it. With her bare hands she
>> grabbed huge handfuls of the bread cubes from the replacement platter and
>> squeezed them into place on the serving platter, smashing as needed to get
>> them to mound and stay in place. In some cases ignorance is bliss and even
>> if she had to use her bare hands to maul the large cubes, I would have
>> preferred it to be out of my sight. Perhaps taken back into the kitchen or
>> rotating two platters on the serving table so she could replenish out of
>> view yet not leave the table without one while the other was in the
>> kitchen.
>
>
>
> That might have been a proper instance for the thoughtful teaching moment.
> Dee Dee <veg>
>
Perhaps, but since I was just an observer and not the hostess nor in the
bridal family or party I didn't even consider it.
I didn't eat the mauled bread either.

"Goomba38" > wrote in message
news
> Dee.Dee wrote:
>> "Goomba38" > wrote in message
>> . ..
>>> I gagged a bit when one woman came out to refill the large bread "cubes"
>>> on the platter that held spinach dip held inside a gutted large round
>>> loaf of pumpernickel bread and bread cubes around it. With her bare
>>> hands she grabbed huge handfuls of the bread cubes from the replacement
>>> platter and squeezed them into place on the serving platter, smashing as
>>> needed to get them to mound and stay in place. In some cases ignorance
>>> is bliss and even if she had to use her bare hands to maul the large
>>> cubes, I would have preferred it to be out of my sight. Perhaps taken
>>> back into the kitchen or rotating two platters on the serving table so
>>> she could replenish out of view yet not leave the table without one
>>> while the other was in the kitchen.
>>
>>
>>
>> That might have been a proper instance for the thoughtful teaching
>> moment.
>> Dee Dee <veg>
> Perhaps, but since I was just an observer and not the hostess nor in the
> bridal family or party I didn't even consider it.
> I didn't eat the mauled bread either.


Certainly not. I was just teasing.

Tell me, what is a SRO ceremony. (Sounds like you had a good time.)
Dee Dee

Dee.Dee wrote:

> Tell me, what is a SRO ceremony. (Sounds like you had a good time.)
> Dee Dee
>

SRO.. often denoting theater performances and the like. Means "Standing
Room Only"

Goomba38 > wrote:

>Dee.Dee wrote:

>> Tell me, what is a SRO ceremony. (Sounds like you had a good time.)
>> Dee Dee

> SRO.. often denoting theater performances and the like. Means
> "Standing Room Only"

Around here it usually means "Single Room Occupancy", a category
of living unit most people would call a "Residence Hotel".

Steve

Goomba38 wrote:

> Friends of the young couple did the food. Pretty simple, low cost stuff.

<snip>
>
> I so wanted to "fix" the buffet table for those folks.

<snip>
>
> I gagged a bit when one woman came out to refill the large bread "cubes" ...

<snip>


> The bar tender (owner of a liquor
> store that does this service for hire) had a HUGE tip bowl out.
> Terribly out of place, and if I were the parents of the bride I would
> have been very embarrassed and upset by this tacky bit of extortion.

<snip>
>
> All in all though, it was still a lovely wedding.

<lol> Could have fooled me.
--
Cheers
Chatty Cathy

Seize the moment. Think of all those women on the 'Titanic' who waved
off the dessert cart.
- Erma Bombeck

"Goomba38" > wrote

> Went to a wedding last PM, held in a very historic building. Way too few
> seats for the assembled (never attended SRO nuptials before! LOL) but the
> atmosphere and the sheer gorgeousness of the space helped soften that
> blow.

I've seen tiny chapels that are just breathtaking, but if you want
more than, say, 100 people there, they'd have to stand or
wait outside.

> Friends of the young couple did the food. Pretty simple, low cost stuff.
> Veggie platters, cheeses, meat trays, mini rolls to make sandwiches,
> meatballs (Nancy Young-grape jelly and chili sauce! I asked!! They were
> actually pretty good. The only warm item on the table),

Oh, no! Another convert! (laugh)

> and of course a gorgeous bridal cake on one one side of the room, and the
> typical UGA symbol grooms cake on a buffet on the other side of the room.
> Bakeries around here must do at least 2 of those a week, LOL. The tables
> were ornamented with floating candles, flowers and netting which looked
> nice at night.

Nice.

> I so wanted to "fix" the buffet table for those folks. The large oval,
> antique table was set with some items on both sides starting with the
> plates (inplying two identical sides so folks could move down on either
> side and not miss anything, but then they had the napkins only on one
> side, and both platters of the meatballs on only one side. So people were
> weaving in and out, and then having to go around the other side for the
> meatballs.Someone just didn't think that one out.

If you're going to have a buffet, plan it out as much as possible.
Too many people with plates and utensils wandering around is
not good.

> They used clear plastic plates and utensils yet I have to say they were
> much nicer than ones I've usually seen for sale in the store?

I think they sell decent ones at party stores. For those of you who
think party store is liquor store, I mean party stores where you buy
and rent stuff for a party, like plates and tables, etc.

> I'm always torn about all that trash in the landfills versus renting (with
> washing/transport) which entails different energy use.

Your area is just coming out of a nasty drought, no? I'll take the
disposable plates in that case.

> I gagged a bit when one woman came out to refill the large bread "cubes"
> on the platter that held spinach dip held inside a gutted large round loaf
> of pumpernickel bread and bread cubes around it. With her bare hands she
> grabbed huge handfuls of the bread cubes from the replacement platter and
> squeezed them into place on the serving platter, smashing as needed to get
> them to mound and stay in place.

Just the idea of it, while funny ... I would take a pass on the bread cubes,
myself.

> All in all though, it was still a lovely wedding.

Doesn't sound as if they'll be paying it off for the next five years the
way a lot of people do. That's a good thing. Sounds like it was fun.

nancy

On Sun, 13 Jan 2008 15:42:57 -0500, "Nancy Young" >
wrote:

>Doesn't sound as if they'll be paying it off for the next five years the
>way a lot of people do. That's a good thing. Sounds like it was fun.

I agree. It's a good thing (grown up thinking) when people recognize
their financial limitations, friends pitch in to help and they aren't
saddled with long term dept paying it off.

--
See return address to reply by email
remove the smiley face first

"Goomba38" > wrote in message
>
> The open bar was in another room. The bar tender (owner of a liquor store
> that does this service for hire) had a HUGE tip bowl out.
> Terribly out of place, and if I were the parents of the bride I would have
> been very embarrassed and upset by this tacky bit of extortion.

It is done all the time, and, IMO, very tacky. If the bartender is being
paid he should etiher be paird a fair wage or tipped by the host, not the
guests.

As for hte bottom shelf choices, I guess that depends on the pockets of the
wedding party as the bar bill can be huge. Over the years, we've all seen
people that would only have one drink if they paid for it suddenly have six
at an open bar.


> All in all though, it was still a lovely wedding.

That is the most important part, often lost in the quest for a fancy
impressive reception. I know a couple that recently divorced and the
wedding is not paid for yet.

Edwin Pawlowski wrote:
> "Goomba38" > wrote in message
>> The open bar was in another room. The bar tender (owner of a liquor store
>> that does this service for hire) had a HUGE tip bowl out.
>> Terribly out of place, and if I were the parents of the bride I would have
>> been very embarrassed and upset by this tacky bit of extortion.
>
> It is done all the time, and, IMO, very tacky. If the bartender is being
> paid he should etiher be paird a fair wage or tipped by the host, not the
> guests.

Very much tacky and out of place. I wonder if the hosts were even aware?
Sure would have nixed any tip they might have felt obliged to give for a
party well served. I would never expect my guests to tip a bartender for
drinks if I've hired his services. I'll take care of any tip,
thankyouverymuch!

"Goomba38" > wrote in message
...
> Edwin Pawlowski wrote:
>> "Goomba38" > wrote in message
>>> The open bar was in another room. The bar tender (owner of a liquor
>>> store that does this service for hire) had a HUGE tip bowl out.
>>> Terribly out of place, and if I were the parents of the bride I would
>>> have been very embarrassed and upset by this tacky bit of extortion.
>>
>> It is done all the time, and, IMO, very tacky. If the bartender is being
>> paid he should etiher be paird a fair wage or tipped by the host, not the
>> guests.
>
> Very much tacky and out of place. I wonder if the hosts were even aware?
> Sure would have nixed any tip they might have felt obliged to give for a
> party well served. I would never expect my guests to tip a bartender for
> drinks if I've hired his services. I'll take care of any tip,
> thankyouverymuch!


Some people love to tip. An expensive trip I took years ago where it said
that all tips were paid/taken care of. It was mentioned over-and-over
during the trip. But at the end of the trip, everyone whispered-whispered
about tipped the guide. They all felt better about themselves giving it to
him. Did I give, too? I don't remember. Maybe yes, maybe no. I liked him
a lot, he was quite entertaining throughout.

Maybe tipping depends on how much the bartender appeals to one, or a guilt
factor, or you just like to do it.
Dee Dee

Dee.Dee wrote:

> Some people love to tip. An expensive trip I took years ago where it said
> that all tips were paid/taken care of. It was mentioned over-and-over
> during the trip. But at the end of the trip, everyone whispered-whispered
> about tipped the guide. They all felt better about themselves giving it to
> him. Did I give, too? I don't remember. Maybe yes, maybe no. I liked him
> a lot, he was quite entertaining throughout.
>
> Maybe tipping depends on how much the bartender appeals to one, or a guilt
> factor, or you just like to do it.
> Dee Dee

Then one can discretely hand a folded up bill to the person as they see
fit and without any public performance. A large tip jar suggests it is
expected and to bypass it makes the guest feel uncomfortable. They do
NOT belong at private functions.

"Dee.Dee" wrote:
>
>
> Some people love to tip. An expensive trip I took years ago where it said
> that all tips were paid/taken care of. It was mentioned over-and-over
> during the trip. But at the end of the trip, everyone whispered-whispered
> about tipped the guide. They all felt better about themselves giving it to
> him. Did I give, too? I don't remember. Maybe yes, maybe no. I liked him
> a lot, he was quite entertaining throughout.
>
> Maybe tipping depends on how much the bartender appeals to one, or a guilt
> factor, or you just like to do it.


I had a similar experience when travelling in Europe with my brothers and
they always wanted to leave at least 15% as a tip and I kept telling them
that it was already included in the bill.

"Dave Smith" > wrote in message
...
> "Dee.Dee" wrote:
>>
>>
>> Some people love to tip. An expensive trip I took years ago where it
>> said
>> that all tips were paid/taken care of. It was mentioned over-and-over
>> during the trip. But at the end of the trip, everyone
>> whispered-whispered
>> about tipped the guide. They all felt better about themselves giving it
>> to
>> him. Did I give, too? I don't remember. Maybe yes, maybe no. I liked
>> him
>> a lot, he was quite entertaining throughout.
>>
>> Maybe tipping depends on how much the bartender appeals to one, or a
>> guilt
>> factor, or you just like to do it.
>
>
> I had a similar experience when travelling in Europe with my brothers and
> they always wanted to leave at least 15% as a tip and I kept telling them
> that it was already included in the bill.


Yeah, I guess even in the countries where they say it's polite to leave your
change, some will continue to tip the full 15%.
Tip-itis.
Dee Dee

"Dave Smith" schrieb :
> "Dee.Dee" wrote:
>>
>>
>> Some people love to tip. An expensive trip I took years ago where it said
>> that all tips were paid/taken care of. It was mentioned over-and-over
>> during the trip. But at the end of the trip, everyone whispered-whispered
>> about tipped the guide. They all felt better about themselves giving it to
>> him. Did I give, too? I don't remember. Maybe yes, maybe no. I liked him
>> a lot, he was quite entertaining throughout.
>>
>> Maybe tipping depends on how much the bartender appeals to one, or a guilt
>> factor, or you just like to do it.
>
>
> I had a similar experience when travelling in Europe with my brothers and
> they always wanted to leave at least 15% as a tip and I kept telling them
> that it was already included in the bill.

Then you've told them wrong.
It depends on the country. While tips are already included in the bill in
Switzerland, they aren't included in the other Australia.
They also aren't included in Germany, unless the bill states "tips included"
(Trinkgeld eingeschlossen).

Cheers,

Michael Kuettner

"Dee.Dee" > wrote in message
> Some people love to tip. An expensive trip I took years ago where it said
> that all tips were paid/taken care of. It was mentioned over-and-over
> during the trip. But at the end of the trip, everyone whispered-whispered
> about tipped the guide. They all felt better about themselves giving it
> to him. Did I give, too? I don't remember. Maybe yes, maybe no. I
> liked him a lot, he was quite entertaining throughout.

We took a trip like that. All tips were included for the hotels and
restaurants, but the tour guide and bus driver was to be tipped. They even
gave some guidelines as to how much.

When we rent a house for a stay, we usually take a gift for the owner but
never a tip.

Edwin Pawlowski wrote:
>
> "Goomba38" > wrote in message
> >
> > The open bar was in another room. The bar tender (owner of a liquor store
> > that does this service for hire) had a HUGE tip bowl out.
> > Terribly out of place, and if I were the parents of the bride I would have
> > been very embarrassed and upset by this tacky bit of extortion.
>
> It is done all the time, and, IMO, very tacky. If the bartender is being
> paid he should etiher be paird a fair wage or tipped by the host, not the
> guests.



Now that you mention it..... yes, it is tacky. My understanding is that
most establishments automatically add a charge for service, usually 15%

> As for hte bottom shelf choices, I guess that depends on the pockets of the
> wedding party as the bar bill can be huge. Over the years, we've all seen
> people that would only have one drink if they paid for it suddenly have six
> at an open bar.

My nephew and his wife had an open bar. They were not at all upset about
the number of drinks people had, but what annoyed them was that the serving
staff were whisking away glasses when people got up to dance, go to the
washroom or to visit with people at another table. People were coming back
and finding their drinks gone and had to get another. They laid the blame
on the people taking the drinks away and, in fact, argued with the hotel
staff and won.

Dave Smith wrote:

> My nephew and his wife had an open bar. They were not at all upset about
> the number of drinks people had, but what annoyed them was that the serving
> staff were whisking away glasses when people got up to dance, go to the
> washroom or to visit with people at another table. People were coming back
> and finding their drinks gone and had to get another. They laid the blame
> on the people taking the drinks away and, in fact, argued with the hotel
> staff and won.

When I've researched this, in my area, open bar is a set fee or cost no
matter how many drinks the guests have. I've been quoted $11 to
$15/person (and you do pay for everyone if they drink alcohol or not!)
but there is no limit to the number of drinks during the arranged hours.

Was your nephew being charged a per drink basis, and then the staff
wasting the half finished drinks? I'd be angry about that too. When my
father paid for my wedding's open bar it was at a military club and they
just ran a tab that my father approved of and when it was depleted they
got approval for x amount of dollars more as needed.

Goomba38 wrote:
>
>
> When I've researched this, in my area, open bar is a set fee or cost no
> matter how many drinks the guests have. I've been quoted $11 to
> $15/person (and you do pay for everyone if they drink alcohol or not!)
> but there is no limit to the number of drinks during the arranged hours.
>
> Was your nephew being charged a per drink basis, and then the staff
> wasting the half finished drinks?

Yes. That was the problem. They would go up and get a drink that was being
charged for per drink, then when they left the table the staff would come
over and remove the glass with the rest of their drink it it.

> I'd be angry about that too. When my
> father paid for my wedding's open bar it was at a military club and they
> just ran a tab that my father approved of and when it was depleted they
> got approval for x amount of dollars more as needed.

Military clubs tend to charge affordable prices for drinks. When we got
married we had the reception at my wife's parent's house. They set up a
marquis tent and had drinks and canapés. My father in law bought the booze
and hired a bartender to serve it. What ever was left over he kept, and
there wasn't that much.

Edwin Pawlowski wrote:
> "Goomba38" > wrote in message
>> The open bar was in another room. The bar tender (owner of a liquor store
>> that does this service for hire) had a HUGE tip bowl out.


Ick.

>
> Over the years, we've all seen
> people that would only have one drink if they paid for it suddenly have six
> at an open bar.


Isn't that the sad truth?


>> All in all though, it was still a lovely wedding.
>
> That is the most important part, often lost in the quest for a fancy
> impressive reception. I know a couple that recently divorced and the
> wedding is not paid for yet.
>

It's wonderful to see young people with their heads on straight. My son
was in a wedding party last summer of an old friend who is a young,
$ucce$$ful doctor. The wedding, on a yacht in S.F. Bay, cost way more
than the down payment on an overpriced California house. She wanted the
wedding, he wanted a house. She won. She is now pregnant and I suspect
she will now insist on the house they can't afford right away because he
is still paying for the wedding. Is this how divorces are made?

gloria p

"Puester" > wrote in message
news
> Edwin Pawlowski wrote:
>> "Goomba38" > wrote in message
>>> The open bar was in another room. The bar tender (owner of a liquor
>>> store that does this service for hire) had a HUGE tip bowl out.
>
>
> Ick.
>
>>
>> Over the years, we've all seen people that would only have one drink if
>> they paid for it suddenly have six at an open bar.
>
>
> Isn't that the sad truth?
>
>
>>> All in all though, it was still a lovely wedding.
>>
>> That is the most important part, often lost in the quest for a fancy
>> impressive reception. I know a couple that recently divorced and the
>> wedding is not paid for yet.
>
> It's wonderful to see young people with their heads on straight. My son
> was in a wedding party last summer of an old friend who is a young,
> $ucce$$ful doctor. The wedding, on a yacht in S.F. Bay, cost way more
> than the down payment on an overpriced California house. She wanted the
> wedding, he wanted a house. She won. She is now pregnant and I suspect
> she will now insist on the house they can't afford right away because he
> is still paying for the wedding. Is this how divorces are made?

It seems to be the "wave" in weddings. Nice wedding, HUGE FREAKING
reception. Wedding budget far exceeding that of a nice downpayment on a
house. I fear I don't understand that kind of overspending for one day. My
wedding seven years ago was nice, everyone had a good time, and not a single
pennies worth of debt for the whole day. When you have to take out a loan to
pay for it all somethings wrong. IMHO anyway.

Cindi

>
> gloria p
>

Cindi - HappyMamatoThree wrote:
>
>
> It seems to be the "wave" in weddings. Nice wedding, HUGE FREAKING
> reception. Wedding budget far exceeding that of a nice downpayment on a
> house. I fear I don't understand that kind of overspending for one day. My
> wedding seven years ago was nice, everyone had a good time, and not a single
> pennies worth of debt for the whole day. When you have to take out a loan to
> pay for it all somethings wrong. IMHO anyway.


I was at a nice wedding a few months ago. The service was at 11 am and
there was a sit down lunch at a nice inn. There was a choice of roasted
chicken breast or poached salmon (choice to be sent with the RSVP). They
served salad before the entree and entree was served with a variety of
roated vegetables. It was very good, but quite modest compared to some of
the weddings I have been to or heard about. The bride and groom paid for
it themselves and I am happy for them that they did not go overboard. a
good time was had by one and all.

The last time I was at the dentist I was talking to the dental assistant,
who had also been to that wedding. We both liked the idea that it was
rather humble, but still very nice. Then we talked about this modern idea
that one should buy a wedding gift worth at least as much as the dinner.
She said that was fine when wedding dinners where $20-25 per person, but
now they are in the hundreds per person. Her attitude at her wedding was
that the people there were her guests and they were entertaining them. they
did not expect them to pay for their meals.

One time on Usenet, Dave Smith > said:

<snip>

> The last time I was at the dentist I was talking to the dental assistant,
> who had also been to that wedding. We both liked the idea that it was
> rather humble, but still very nice. Then we talked about this modern idea
> that one should buy a wedding gift worth at least as much as the dinner.

What??

> She said that was fine when wedding dinners where $20-25 per person, but
> now they are in the hundreds per person. Her attitude at her wedding was
> that the people there were her guests and they were entertaining them. they
> did not expect them to pay for their meals.

Damn right! I was thrilled that guests came to our wedding and cared
enough about us to give gifts (mostly money, as we were about to move
across the country). I can't imagine thinking that those gifts should
offset the cost of entertaining said guests. Let alone using them to
pay off some ridiculously priced wedding with thousand-dollar cakes
and flying doves and whatnot...

--
Jani in WA

"Dave Smith" > wrote in message
...
> Cindi - HappyMamatoThree wrote:
>>
>>
>> It seems to be the "wave" in weddings. Nice wedding, HUGE FREAKING
>> reception. Wedding budget far exceeding that of a nice downpayment on a
>> house. I fear I don't understand that kind of overspending for one day.
>> My
>> wedding seven years ago was nice, everyone had a good time, and not a
>> single
>> pennies worth of debt for the whole day. When you have to take out a loan
>> to
>> pay for it all somethings wrong. IMHO anyway.
>
>
> I was at a nice wedding a few months ago. The service was at 11 am and
> there was a sit down lunch at a nice inn. There was a choice of roasted
> chicken breast or poached salmon (choice to be sent with the RSVP). They
> served salad before the entree and entree was served with a variety of
> roated vegetables. It was very good, but quite modest compared to some of
> the weddings I have been to or heard about. The bride and groom paid for
> it themselves and I am happy for them that they did not go overboard. a
> good time was had by one and all.
>
> The last time I was at the dentist I was talking to the dental assistant,
> who had also been to that wedding. We both liked the idea that it was
> rather humble, but still very nice. Then we talked about this modern idea
> that one should buy a wedding gift worth at least as much as the dinner.
> She said that was fine when wedding dinners where $20-25 per person, but
> now they are in the hundreds per person. Her attitude at her wedding was
> that the people there were her guests and they were entertaining them.
> they
> did not expect them to pay for their meals.

Sounds like a nice reception in tune with what the bride and groom and
guests were comfortable. I had heard that gift value recommendation before
of course if dinner is $250 a plate that's a whole host of gifts
unattainable by a lot of weddings guests.

What happened to receptions that were just finger foods and wedding cake
with punch? I don't seem to remember all receptions being sit down dinners
when I was a teen, young married going to lots of weddings for classmates
and friends.

Cindi

On Jan 13, 5:45*pm, Puester > wrote:
> Edwin Pawlowski wrote:
> > "Goomba38" > wrote in message
> >> The open bar was in another room. The bar tender (owner of a liquor store
> >> that does this service for hire) had a HUGE tip bowl out.
>
> Ick.
>
>
>
> > *Over the years, we've all seen
> > people that would only have one drink if they paid for it suddenly have six
> > at an open bar.
>
> Isn't that the sad truth?
>
> >> All in all though, it was still a lovelywedding.
>
> > That is the most important part, often lost in the quest for a fancy
> > impressive reception. *I know a couple that recently divorced and the
> >weddingis not paid for yet.
>
> It's wonderful to see young people with their heads on straight. *My son
> was in aweddingparty last summer of an old friend who is a young,
> $ucce$$ful doctor. *Thewedding, on a yacht in S.F. Bay, cost way more
> than the down payment on an overpriced California house. *She wanted thewedding, he wanted a house. *She won. *She is now pregnant and I suspect
> she will now insist on the house they can't afford right away because he
> is still paying for thewedding. *Is this how divorces are made?
>
> gloria p

Try not to jump to conclusions on a couple's relationship strength
based on how the level of extravangance for their wedding. My husband
and I excitedly chose the extravagant (on our terms) wedding and
reception. Now, while the cost of this wedding could have paid for a
house (and less than 30% of it was paid for by my parents) my husband
and I were so happy with the day, the night and now with the memories
we have (I cannot tell you the number of times we have watched our
video or looked at our pics in the last 2 years!). We talk about it
often, and do not regret a cent we spent one bit!

Neither of us are overflowing with excess cash (other than our
stockpile for the purchase of an apartment) like how it is implied of
the successful doctor, but we work very hard for what we have and
choose to do what we want with our money. We did not have to go into
debt for our wedding, but if we had, it would not be anyone's business
but our own.

I know plenty of people who have had thoughtless and inexpensive
wedding celebrations whose marriages you couldn't pay me to be a part
of. Those who spend $35 at City Hall have to contend with the same
issues of marriage just as much as those who "overspend" on what they
deem a proper celebration.

"Goomba38" > wrote in message
. ..
> Went to a wedding last PM, held in a very historic building. Way too few
> seats for the assembled (never attended SRO nuptials before! LOL) but the
> atmosphere and the sheer gorgeousness of the space helped soften that
> blow. Luckily we had seats, although not the best. The groom is a sweet
> man, a friend of my son's who recently returned from a year in the desert.
>
> Friends of the young couple did the food. Pretty simple, low cost stuff.
> Veggie platters, cheeses, meat trays, mini rolls to make sandwiches,
> meatballs (Nancy Young-grape jelly and chili sauce! I asked!! They were
> actually pretty good. The only warm item on the table), and of course a
> gorgeous bridal cake on one one side of the room, and the typical UGA
> symbol grooms cake on a buffet on the other side of the room. Bakeries
> around here must do at least 2 of those a week, LOL. The tables were
> ornamented with floating candles, flowers and netting which looked nice at
> night.
>
> I so wanted to "fix" the buffet table for those folks. The large oval,
> antique table was set with some items on both sides starting with the
> plates (inplying two identical sides so folks could move down on either
> side and not miss anything, but then they had the napkins only on one
> side, and both platters of the meatballs on only one side. So people were
> weaving in and out, and then having to go around the other side for the
> meatballs.Someone just didn't think that one out. They used clear plastic
> plates and utensils yet I have to say they were much nicer than ones I've
> usually seen for sale in the store? I'm always torn about all that trash
> in the landfills versus renting (with washing/transport) which entails
> different energy use.
>
> I gagged a bit when one woman came out to refill the large bread "cubes"
> on the platter that held spinach dip held inside a gutted large round loaf
> of pumpernickel bread and bread cubes around it. With her bare hands she
> grabbed huge handfuls of the bread cubes from the replacement platter and
> squeezed them into place on the serving platter, smashing as needed to get
> them to mound and stay in place. In some cases ignorance is bliss and even
> if she had to use her bare hands to maul the large cubes, I would have
> preferred it to be out of my sight. Perhaps taken back into the kitchen or
> rotating two platters on the serving table so she could replenish out of
> view yet not leave the table without one while the other was in the
> kitchen.
>
> The open bar was in another room. The bar tender (owner of a liquor store
> that does this service for hire) had a HUGE tip bowl out.
> Terribly out of place, and if I were the parents of the bride I would have
> been very embarrassed and upset by this tacky bit of extortion.
> Good wines (I enjoyed a lovely Spatlasse from Germany) but for the mixed
> drinks it was all bottom shelf liquor which might matter to some? I didn't
> try the punch in the fountain but it looked to be a citrus punch. The
> bridal party seemed to favor bottled beer, LOL.
>
> All in all though, it was still a lovely wedding.

Sounds like the friends did a nice job with the food, and what a great thing
for them to do for the wedding couple! Wedding food is, apparently, not
cheap. My nephew's wedding was a couple of months back. They really wanted
the buffet to be spectacular, and from what I understand, the food alone
cost them around $50 per guest. Everyone seemed to think it was fabulous, I
was the only one not so impressed.

The wedding and reception were in the same room, so we were seated at our
tables for the wedding. As soon as the ceremony was finished, they opened
the bar (tip jar!), and a large table with a spectacular arrangement of
fruit and cheese and ice sculpture, while servers walked around with trays
of lumpia. Meanwhile they set up the buffet. They served, on a huge platform
of ice bricks, little shot glasses with a basil leaf and three or four small
marinated shrimp (looked just like a civeche presentation from Top Chef). A
huge display, lots of ice and cool lighting, but just a few tiny shrimp in
each portion. I guess they spent all they saved on shrimp on the ice
sculpture! Then a server carved beef tenderloin, and they had some potato
rolls and a few sauces--good, but nothing really special. The next table had
little BLT canapes-I thought they were a little too salty but everyone else
seemed to love them. Then a table with some pretty standard crab-stuffed
mushrooms. Finally, they had a table with lots of martini glasses, a big
bowl of mashed potatoes, and potato toppings. You got a martini glass of
potatoes and dressed them up yourself. Again, everyone seemed to think it
was so impressive, except for me.

I can't believe that cost $50 a head! But, the presentation was pretty
spectacular, and everyone I talked to was thoroughly impressed. Makes me
think I should get into the wedding business!

All in all, though, a beautiful wedding. Spectacular flowers in a
window-filled hall on a river, with the ceremony held during a spectacular
sunset. The colors were champaigne and chocolate, with vividly colored
flowers, and an incredibly gorgeous bride (my nephew married up! lol). And
the flow of wedding to reception to on the way home was painless. Too bad I
didn't stay long enough to see the mother of the groom (my sis) dancing on
the tables, lol! Thank goodness for video!

Cheers!
Mo

"Goomba38" schrieb :
<snip>

> The open bar was in another room. The bar tender (owner of a liquor store that
> does this service for hire) had a HUGE tip bowl out.
> Terribly out of place, and if I were the parents of the bride I would have
> been very embarrassed and upset by this tacky bit of extortion.
> Good wines (I enjoyed a lovely Spatlasse from Germany) but for the mixed
> drinks it was all bottom shelf liquor which might matter to some? I didn't try
> the punch in the fountain but it looked to be a citrus punch. The bridal party
> seemed to favor bottled beer, LOL.
>
Do you mean Spaetlese (umlaut) or was that the name of the wine ?
(For our non German speaking readers : Lese means the harvest of the
grapes. Spaet (umlaut) means that they are harvested after the first frost.
That concentrates the fruit sugar and makes for a sweeter wine).

Cheers,

Michael Kuettner

Michael Kuettner wrote:

> Do you mean Spaetlese (umlaut) or was that the name of the wine ?

Yup.. that's what I meant.

Michael Kuettner > wrote:

> Do you mean Spaetlese (umlaut) or was that the name of the wine ?
> (For our non German speaking readers : Lese means the harvest of the
> grapes. Spaet (umlaut) means that they are harvested after the first frost.
> That concentrates the fruit sugar and makes for a sweeter wine).

It just means "late harvest" wine, i.e. one made with riper grapes
containing more sugar. How one makes the wine is another matter -
"trocken", i.e. dry (and more alcoholic), Spätlese wines are very common
indeed. Harvesting grapes during (not after) a frost, when the grapes
are actually frozen, is mandatory for making Eiswein, which is probably
what you are thinking of. Eiswein has to be of at least Beerenauslese
quality nowadays, though there was a time when Spätlese sufficed.

Victor

Victor Sack wrote:

> It just means "late harvest" wine, i.e. one made with riper grapes
> containing more sugar. How one makes the wine is another matter -
> "trocken", i.e. dry (and more alcoholic), Spätlese wines are very common
> indeed. Harvesting grapes during (not after) a frost, when the grapes
> are actually frozen, is mandatory for making Eiswein, which is probably
> what you are thinking of. Eiswein has to be of at least Beerenauslese
> quality nowadays, though there was a time when Spätlese sufficed.
>
> Victor

I bought some Eiswein last year that was very good but really was
incredible when I used it to macerate some fresh strawberries with. Amazing!

Goomba38 > wrote:

> I bought some Eiswein last year that was very good but really was
> incredible when I used it to macerate some fresh strawberries with. Amazing!

A Riesling Eiswein?

Victor

Victor Sack wrote:
> Goomba38 > wrote:
>
>> I bought some Eiswein last year that was very good but really was
>> incredible when I used it to macerate some fresh strawberries with. Amazing!
>
> A Riesling Eiswein?
>
> Victor

I am reading the bottle now-
Ah! It wasn't even German, I'd forgotten (sorry Vic, lol).

2003 Jackson-Triggs, Proprietors Reserve
Vidal Icewine
vqa Niagara Pennisula
Vin blanc
Produit du Canada
10.5% alcohol by volume
Residual sugar 220g/litre, Brix 39.5

Sqwertz wrote:
> On Sun, 13 Jan 2008 14:09:31 -0500, Goomba38 wrote:
>
>> With her bare
>> hands she grabbed huge handfuls of the bread cubes from the replacement
>> platter and squeezed them into place on the serving platter, smashing as
>> needed to get them to mound and stay in place. In some cases ignorance
>> is bliss and even if she had to use her bare hands to maul the large
>> cubes, I would have preferred it to be out of my sight.
>
> You'd be luck to never see the inside of a restaurant kitchen, or
> even watch them assemble your fast food burger - most assebly and
> much of the cooking is done with bare hands.
>
> -sw

No problem except at a wedding buffet line I don't want to see the
"help" squishing bread into submission with their bare hands. It was off
putting to say the least.

On Sun, 13 Jan 2008 19:22:59 GMT, Sqwertz >
wrote:

>On Sun, 13 Jan 2008 14:09:31 -0500, Goomba38 wrote:
>
>> With her bare
>> hands she grabbed huge handfuls of the bread cubes from the replacement
>> platter and squeezed them into place on the serving platter, smashing as
>> needed to get them to mound and stay in place. In some cases ignorance
>> is bliss and even if she had to use her bare hands to maul the large
>> cubes, I would have preferred it to be out of my sight.
>
>You'd be luck to never see the inside of a restaurant kitchen, or
>even watch them assemble your fast food burger - most assebly and
>much of the cooking is done with bare hands.

And rightly so too - hands are essential in cooking, and I certainly
use my bare hands quite often while cooking.
Funny what shocks one. I wouldn't have even noticed the use of bare
hands in this case - seems so normal to me!

Nathalie in Switzerland

"Nathalie Chiva" > wrote in message
>>
>>You'd be luck to never see the inside of a restaurant kitchen, or
>>even watch them assemble your fast food burger - most assebly and
>>much of the cooking is done with bare hands.
>
> And rightly so too - hands are essential in cooking, and I certainly
> use my bare hands quite often while cooking.
> Funny what shocks one. I wouldn't have even noticed the use of bare
> hands in this case - seems so normal to me!
>
> Nathalie in Switzerland


I always think, "Where have these fingernails been?"

I use my bare hands, too, but when I do messy jobs, I always don the gloves.
So much easier than washing the oils and bread dough off hands.
Dee Dee

"Dee.Dee" > wrote in message
...
>
> "Nathalie Chiva" > wrote in
> message
>>>
>>>You'd be luck to never see the inside of a restaurant kitchen, or
>>>even watch them assemble your fast food burger - most assebly and
>>>much of the cooking is done with bare hands.
>>
>> And rightly so too - hands are essential in cooking, and I certainly
>> use my bare hands quite often while cooking.
>> Funny what shocks one. I wouldn't have even noticed the use of bare
>> hands in this case - seems so normal to me!
>>
>> Nathalie in Switzerland
>
>
> I always think, "Where have these fingernails been?"
>
> I use my bare hands, too, but when I do messy jobs, I always don the
> gloves. So much easier than washing the oils and bread dough off hands.
> Dee Dee
>
I'm not put off at bare hands in the kitchen, as long as the hands are kept
sanitary. If handwashing is done whenever the hands are contaminated (even
by just touching the face or hair), and general good hygene is followed,
bare hands worry me no more than gloves. Bear in mind that the food service
person wearing the gloves is just as likely as the bare-handed person to
have touched their hair or face with the gloves. Frequently, they handled
the gloves extensively just putting them on, which passes any contaminants
on the hands to the gloves. Some frugal kitchen workers will try and stick
with the same pair of gloves for as long as possible, and they end up more
contaminated than bare hands would have been, since it's so much easier to
wash hands when not wearing gloves.

A local bakery opened a few years ago, and I was really eager to support
them. They sold soup and sandwiches as well, and while I was standing in
line to buy my pastry, someone bought some soup. The person at the register
took the money, made change, and then went to gt the soup. She ladled a soup
into a cup, then took a small container of chives from the frdge. she
pinched some chives with her fingers, put them in the soup, then sort of
rubbed her fingers together over the soup to get all the chives off. I
nearly hurled. There was no handwashing in that whole process, AND she let
us see it. I turned and left, never went back, could not eat anything made
there now if you paid me.

Our local health department regulations require gloves for touching any food
that's not going to be cooked after you touch it. But unless the person
running the kitchen makes sure that gloves, and bare hands, are kept
properly sanitary, then the gloves don't matter. In fact, I'd generally
perfer bare hands with very frequent hand washing.

Cheers!
Mo

"Mo" > wrote in message
...
.. In fact, I'd generally
> perfer bare hands with very frequent hand washing.
>
> Cheers!
> Mo

Me, too.
And I understand both sides of the coin.

I'm speaking more to bathroom contamination.

I would think that the worker doesn't wear gloves to the bathroom.

Alas who knows where those un-gloved fingers/fingernails have been without
washing up.
There are no kitchen-police standing at the bathroom stall.

Dee Dee

One time on Usenet, Janet Baraclough > said:
> The message >
> from "Dee.Dee" > contains these words:
>
>
> > I always think, "Where have these fingernails been?"
>
> > I use my bare hands, too, but when I do messy jobs, I always don the
> > gloves.
>
> Do you ever think "where were those gloves made "?

Or where have they been? Miguel (DH) has noticed (particularly
at the state fair) that people will handle money, garbage, and
then food while wearing the same gloves, as though that makes
it okay! I had to wear latex gloves for a seafood cooking
contest -- I kept washing my hands anyway and the gloves got
full of water. I'd have rather been barehanded. But I can also
see Goomba's point. Had I been refilling a bread cube tray (bowl,
whatever it was) at a wedding or similar gathering, I'd have
used tongs...

--
Jani in WA

Janet Baraclough wrote:
> The message >
> from "Dee.Dee" > contains these words:
>
>
>> I always think, "Where have these fingernails been?"
>
>> I use my bare hands, too, but when I do messy jobs, I always don the
>> gloves.
>
> Do you ever think "where were those gloves made "?

I can't "get-on" with using gloves while cooking, anyway. I prefer to
wash my hands whenever it's necessary. For instance I always wash my
hands before starting prep. on anything, and I wash them in between
handling different foods. I also keep separate cutting boards for
vegetables and meat - and wash and dry those as soon as I am finished.
Probably not "totally hygienic" but it seems to work for me. As for
going to 'gatherings' where they serve food - I am willing to bet a lot
of us would 'gag' if we saw what goes on 'behind the scenes' - but "What
the eye doesn't see the heart doesn't grieve" or maybe in this case the
stomach? Didn't you mention how the food is handled on some of those TV
cooking shows at some point, or was that somebody else?
--
Cheers
Chatty Cathy

Seize the moment. Think of all those women on the 'Titanic' who waved
off the dessert cart.
- Erma Bombeck