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Ubiquitous 13-10-2008 10:23 AM

Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee: Book Club Luncheon
 
Book Club Luncheon

Layered crab salad; roasted chile guacamole; pesto chicken
panini; banana chocolate chip cake.

I caught this ep Sunday but didn't realize it was a new one until just
now. The shock of seeing SLop in that hideous retinal burn inducing
yellow and white ensemble made it nearly impossible to look directly at
her this week. Perhaps that was the intended plan? Being unable to watch
SLop directly caused my mind to wander, but at one point I couldn't help
but laugh when I noticed her trying to subdue a sandwich of epic
proportions with a skillet. Since I watch Good Eats, I knew what she was
trying to do, but it's hilarious watching her screw up what she sees on
real cooking shows! Did I see SLop tell us to put heavy cream in her
mocktail but pour in half anf half? Guacamole mixed with mashed
peas? Did SLop desecrate books again for the tablerape portion of the
show? Once again, I was only paying half attention and thought she had a
notepad with a sentence on it that was to be passed to your left after
adding a sentence and read aloud when after it completed the circuit.
Was this "book club" perchance her future nieces' Scholastic Book Club?

--
WARNING!!!
Use of these recipes may be hazardous to your health, food budget,
standing in your community and liver function. Use at your own risk!!
We assume no liability from any illness or injury sustained while
eating the "food" or being exposed to crapass tablescapes. And no,
we're not sure where she grew up either. The Cordon Bleu disavows any
knowlege of Miss Lee.




ANIM8Rfsk 13-10-2008 01:31 PM

Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee: Book Club Luncheon
 
In article >,
(Ubiquitous) wrote:

> Book Club Luncheon
>
> Layered crab salad; roasted chile guacamole; pesto chicken
> panini; banana chocolate chip cake.
>
> I caught this ep Sunday but didn't realize it was a new one until just
> now. The shock of seeing SLop in that hideous retinal burn inducing
> yellow and white ensemble made it nearly impossible to look directly at
> her this week. Perhaps that was the intended plan? Being unable to watch
> SLop directly caused my mind to wander, but at one point I couldn't help
> but laugh when I noticed her trying to subdue a sandwich of epic
> proportions with a skillet. Since I watch Good Eats, I knew what she was
> trying to do, but it's hilarious watching her screw up what she sees on
> real cooking shows! Did I see SLop tell us to put heavy cream in her
> mocktail but pour in half anf half? Guacamole mixed with mashed
> peas? Did SLop desecrate books again for the tablerape portion of the
> show? Once again, I was only paying half attention and thought she had a
> notepad with a sentence on it that was to be passed to your left after
> adding a sentence and read aloud when after it completed the circuit.
> Was this "book club" perchance her future nieces' Scholastic Book Club?


Oh, God, the favors. She had books with inspirational sayings on the
inside (she made a big deal about this, lest you buy book with the text
on the outside) and then she ripped pages out of bigger books and
highlighted random words in yellow, and then all the girl were to make
up a story using her highlighted words, going round robin around the
table.

--
Third root canal - averted.

Hip Hip Hurrah!

Ubiquitous 14-10-2008 10:37 AM

Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee: Book Club Luncheon
 
wrote:
>
(Ubiquitous) wrote:

>> Did SLop desecrate books again for the tablerape portion of the show?
>> Once again, I was only paying half attention and thought she had a
>> notepad with a sentence on it that was to be passed to your left after
>> adding a sentence and read aloud when after it completed the circuit.
>> Was this "book club" perchance her future nieces' Scholastic Book Club?

>
>Oh, God, the favors. She had books with inspirational sayings on the
>inside (she made a big deal about this, lest you buy book with the text
>on the outside) and then she ripped pages out of bigger books and
>highlighted random words in yellow, and then all the girl were to make
>up a story using her highlighted words, going round robin around the table.


Grrr... what does that stupid **** have against books?

--
WARNING!!!
Use of these recipes may be hazardous to your health, food budget,
standing in your community and liver function. Use at your own risk!!
We assume no liability from any illness or injury sustained while
eating the "food" or being exposed to crapass tablescapes. And no,
we're not sure where she grew up either. The Cordon Bleu disavows any
knowlege of Miss Lee.




ANIM8Rfsk 14-10-2008 04:15 PM

Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee: Book Club Luncheon
 
In article >,
Ubiquitous > wrote:

> wrote:
> >
(Ubiquitous) wrote:
>
> >> Did SLop desecrate books again for the tablerape portion of the show?
> >> Once again, I was only paying half attention and thought she had a
> >> notepad with a sentence on it that was to be passed to your left after
> >> adding a sentence and read aloud when after it completed the circuit.
> >> Was this "book club" perchance her future nieces' Scholastic Book Club?

> >
> >Oh, God, the favors. She had books with inspirational sayings on the
> >inside (she made a big deal about this, lest you buy book with the text
> >on the outside) and then she ripped pages out of bigger books and
> >highlighted random words in yellow, and then all the girl were to make
> >up a story using her highlighted words, going round robin around the table.

>
> Grrr... what does that stupid **** have against books?


Not to mention her guests.

--
Third root canal - averted.

Hip Hip Hurrah!

Ubiquitous 14-10-2008 05:35 PM

Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee: Book Club Luncheon
 
wrote:
> Ubiquitous > wrote:
>>
wrote:
>> >
(Ubiquitous) wrote:


>> >> Did SLop desecrate books again for the tablerape portion of the show?
>> >> Once again, I was only paying half attention and thought she had a
>> >> notepad with a sentence on it that was to be passed to your left after
>> >> adding a sentence and read aloud when after it completed the circuit.
>> >> Was this "book club" perchance her future nieces' Scholastic Book Club?
>> >
>> >Oh, God, the favors. She had books with inspirational sayings on the
>> >inside (she made a big deal about this, lest you buy book with the text
>> >on the outside) and then she ripped pages out of bigger books and
>> >highlighted random words in yellow, and then all the girl were to make
>> >up a story using her highlighted words, going round robin around the
>> >table.

>>
>> Grrr... what does that stupid **** have against books?

>
>Not to mention her guests.


Assuming people actually show up at her parties...


--
WARNING!!!
Use of these recipes may be hazardous to your health, food budget,
standing in your community and liver function. Use at your own risk!!
We assume no liability from any illness or injury sustained while
eating the "food" or being exposed to crapass tablescapes. And no,
we're not sure where she grew up either. The Cordon Bleu disavows any
knowlege of Miss Lee.




Dan Abel 14-10-2008 08:41 PM

Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee: Book Club Luncheon
 
In article >,
Ubiquitous > wrote:

> wrote:
> > Ubiquitous > wrote:
> >>
wrote:
> >> >
(Ubiquitous) wrote:

>
> >> >> Did SLop desecrate books again for the tablerape portion of the show?
> >> >> Once again, I was only paying half attention and thought she had a
> >> >> notepad with a sentence on it that was to be passed to your left after
> >> >> adding a sentence and read aloud when after it completed the circuit.
> >> >> Was this "book club" perchance her future nieces' Scholastic Book Club?
> >> >
> >> >Oh, God, the favors. She had books with inspirational sayings on the
> >> >inside (she made a big deal about this, lest you buy book with the text
> >> >on the outside) and then she ripped pages out of bigger books and
> >> >highlighted random words in yellow, and then all the girl were to make
> >> >up a story using her highlighted words, going round robin around the
> >> >table.
> >>
> >> Grrr... what does that stupid **** have against books?

> >
> >Not to mention her guests.

>
> Assuming people actually show up at her parties...


I don't mind shows where there is no claim that people are actually
going to eat the food being prepared. I don't mind shows where the cook
is making the food for people, either friends or family, and the end of
the show has family or friends actually eating the food. I don't care
if it is just 30 seconds, it brings the show full circle to completion.
Giada does this sometimes, and I like it. I don't like it, though, when
the cook claims to be cooking the food to be eaten by family or friends,
and then the show ends with nobody eating the food. That's Sandra Lee.
She sometimes tastes the food herself while cooking, but nobody else
ever eats it, during the show or at the end. Of course, she *always*
tastes her alcoholic drinks. Quality control counts there. There
doesn't even seem to be room on her tablescapes for the food, although
certainly somebody could haul the plates Into the kitchen and plate the
food there. Still, if I had to sit at one of those tablescapes, it's
possible that I would lose my appetite. Sandra Lee sometimes has
relatives there, but they don't taste. Her sister Kimmy was there once,
her niece Stephanie was there once and Brycer has been there more than
once (I seldom watch the show, only when I feel like some comedy, so
they may have actually appeared many more times). Stephanie and Brycer
were there with friends, although they were invisible. Stephanie was
there for a sleepover with her invisible friends, and Aunt Sandy was
making breakfast for them. Aunt Sandy made a big point that the *two*
dishes that she made with frozen "hash brown" potato bits would contain
no ketchup, and no ketchup would be served with them. She didn't
explain why ketchup was so horrible for kids, but I assumed it was the
large amount of sugar in them (my open bottle of ketchup says 4g of
sugars per tablespoon). No ketchup for those kids! A few minutes
later, Aunt Sandy is making deep fried chicken fingers. Doesn't sound
like a traditional breakfast, but kids don't care. She makes a dipping
sauce of half mustard and half honey. Hello? Doesn't she know that
honey has sugar in it? Well, many kids that age don't like mustard
anyway, and even if they do, they won't pig out on it. She makes
another dipping sauce out of half ketchup and half honey. Hello? What
happened to "no ketchup" for the kids? Does she think that adding honey
will make it have less sugar?

--
Dan Abel
Petaluma, California USA


Ubiquitous 15-10-2008 05:48 PM

Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee: Book Club Luncheon
 
wrote:
wrote:


>>I caught this ep Sunday but didn't realize it was a new one until just
>>now. The shock of seeing SLop in that hideous retinal burn inducing
>>yellow and white ensemble made it nearly impossible to look directly at
>>her this week. Perhaps that was the intended plan? Being unable to watch
>>SLop directly caused my mind to wander, but at one point I couldn't help
>>but laugh when I noticed her trying to subdue a sandwich of epic
>>proportions with a skillet. Since I watch Good Eats, I knew what she was
>>trying to do, but it's hilarious watching her screw up what she sees on
>>real cooking shows! Did I see SLop tell us to put heavy cream in her
>>mocktail but pour in half anf half? Guacamole mixed with mashed
>>peas? Did SLop desecrate books again for the tablerape portion of the
>>show? Once again, I was only paying half attention and thought she had a
>>notepad with a sentence on it that was to be passed to your left after
>>adding a sentence and read aloud when after it completed the circuit.
>>Was this "book club" perchance her future nieces' Scholastic Book Club?

>
>So, today's SLop was an SD show stretched out to be HD. First, this
>makes SLop short and fat. Second, they used that unholy stretching
>method that unevenly smears the sides, so during the constant camera
>panning back and forth all the food and dishes and her hands were
>flowing and distorting and it's the only thing they could have done to
>make her food less appealing.


I have never seen SLop in HD, but I wouold suspect seeing her distorted image
would be the LEAST of my worries! I recall seeing the Goggily-Eyed Skeletor
in HD once at BestBuy and my gawd, she looked terrible!

>Pull much more of this crap, Food TV, and we won't be watching you at
>all any more.


Admit it, you like to mock SLop too.

>She makes Guac
>and extends it by adding PEAS
>gah


Oddly enough, Cook's Illustrated, I think, experimented with Guacamole
extenders and rejected using peas. They recomended baby lima beans, if
you won't sleep tonight without knowing, BTW.

>Also, her shopping tip was to pick the small end of the avocado off IN
>THE STORE so you can see how green it is! Jesus lady -- you break it,
>you've bought it.


Bwah! I wonder if she squeezes tomoatoes?

>Then she shows you how to use a paring knife to cut the avocado in the
>skin into perfect squares, carefully spoon it out (leaving lots of good
>flesh behind) and . . . MASH THE PERFECT SQUARES TO DEATH WITH A FORK SO
>YOU CAN'T TELL THEM FROM THE SMUSHED PEAS.


Except in her case, she didn't quite smash them enough to make the mixture
homogeneous.

--
WARNING!!!
Use of these recipes may be hazardous to your health, food budget,
standing in your community and liver function. Use at your own risk!!
We assume no liability from any illness or injury sustained while
eating the "food" or being exposed to crapass tablescapes. And no,
we're not sure where she grew up either. The Cordon Bleu disavows any
knowlege of Miss Lee.


Nancy Young[_2_] 19-10-2008 02:14 PM

Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee: Book Club Luncheon
 
Ubiquitous wrote:
> Book Club Luncheon
>
> Layered crab salad; roasted chile guacamole; pesto chicken
> panini; banana chocolate chip cake.
>
> I caught this ep Sunday but didn't realize it was a new one until just
> now. The shock of seeing SLop in that hideous retinal burn inducing
> yellow and white ensemble made it nearly impossible to look directly
> at her this week.


(laugh) I just got around to watching it. This is the first time
I've seen the show downstairs on the big screen HDTV.
Between the yellow apron, the curtains and the vase of roses,
it was rather blinding.

>Perhaps that was the intended plan? Being unable to
> watch SLop directly caused my mind to wander, but at one point I
> couldn't help but laugh when I noticed her trying to subdue a
> sandwich of epic proportions with a skillet. Since I watch Good Eats,
> I knew what she was trying to do, but it's hilarious watching her
> screw up what she sees on real cooking shows!


Watching her move the sandwich to a cutting board from the
griddle, you could see that coming. Move the cutting board
over and just slide it across!

Sandwich did look pretty good, I'd eat it.

> Guacamole mixed with mashed peas?


I'm not the queen of guacamole or anything, but I've never
made it with cooked ingredients. She cooked the peas and
onions along with some garlic and a guacamole flavor powder
pouch, whatever is in that.

> Did SLop desecrate books again for the tablerape portion of the
> show?


She said it was an old book. I guess it wasn't good anymore.

nancy

ANIM8Rfsk 19-10-2008 05:28 PM

Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee: Book Club Luncheon
 
In article >,
"Nancy Young" > wrote:

> Ubiquitous wrote:
> > Book Club Luncheon
> >
> > Layered crab salad; roasted chile guacamole; pesto chicken
> > panini; banana chocolate chip cake.
> >
> > I caught this ep Sunday but didn't realize it was a new one until just
> > now. The shock of seeing SLop in that hideous retinal burn inducing
> > yellow and white ensemble made it nearly impossible to look directly
> > at her this week.

>
> (laugh) I just got around to watching it. This is the first time
> I've seen the show downstairs on the big screen HDTV.
> Between the yellow apron, the curtains and the vase of roses,
> it was rather blinding.


This week: Sandra Lee, more nauseating than ever!
>
> >Perhaps that was the intended plan? Being unable to
> > watch SLop directly caused my mind to wander, but at one point I
> > couldn't help but laugh when I noticed her trying to subdue a
> > sandwich of epic proportions with a skillet. Since I watch Good Eats,
> > I knew what she was trying to do, but it's hilarious watching her
> > screw up what she sees on real cooking shows!

>
> Watching her move the sandwich to a cutting board from the
> griddle, you could see that coming. Move the cutting board
> over and just slide it across!
>
> Sandwich did look pretty good, I'd eat it.


I still want it right side up.
>
> > Guacamole mixed with mashed peas?

>
> I'm not the queen of guacamole or anything, but I've never
> made it with cooked ingredients. She cooked the peas and
> onions along with some garlic and a guacamole flavor powder
> pouch, whatever is in that.


Got one right here. Note it says "Just add avocadoes"

Maltodextrin, onion, sour cream powder, lemon juice powder, salt,
spices, garlic powder, red bell peppers, natural & artificial flavor,
partially hydrogenated soybean oil.
>
> > Did SLop desecrate books again for the tablerape portion of the
> > show?

>
> She said it was an old book. I guess it wasn't good anymore.


Must have been one of her cook books then.

--
UFObama
On 10/14 a UFO 2000 miles across, the size of the Moon, landed on Alabama.
ACORN has already signed up all 16 million illegal aliens onboard to vote.


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