Fortune Cookie Horror
 

Before I opened my individually-wrapped fortune cookie last night, I
read the label:

"Bleached wheat flour, sugar, ... high fructose cyamopsis
tetragonoloba..."

I put the fortune cookie down and stepped back carefully, not
wanting to know what else was in store for me.

-sw

Fortune Cookie Horror
 

Sqwertz wrote:
>
> Before I opened my individually-wrapped fortune cookie last night, I
> read the label:
>
> "Bleached wheat flour, sugar, ... high fructose cyamopsis
> tetragonoloba..."
>
> I put the fortune cookie down and stepped back carefully, not
> wanting to know what else was in store for me.

Oh, fer cryin' out loud. What a weenie!
It's guar gum.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guar

Fortune Cookie Horror
 

On Thu, 29 Jan 2009 19:44:53 -0800, Mark Thorson >
wrote:

>Sqwertz wrote:
>>
>> Before I opened my individually-wrapped fortune cookie last night, I
>> read the label:
>>
>> "Bleached wheat flour, sugar, ... high fructose cyamopsis
>> tetragonoloba..."
>>
>> I put the fortune cookie down and stepped back carefully, not
>> wanting to know what else was in store for me.
>
>Oh, fer cryin' out loud. What a weenie!
>It's guar gum.
>
>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guar

Yabbut, who wants gum made out of these things?
http://animals.mongabay.com/zoo/guar-01.html
--
modom

ambitious when it comes to fiddling with meat

Fortune Cookie Horror
 

Sqwertz wrote:
> Before I opened my individually-wrapped fortune cookie last night, I
> read the label:
>
> "Bleached wheat flour, sugar, ... high fructose cyamopsis
> tetragonoloba..."
>
> I put the fortune cookie down and stepped back carefully, not
> wanting to know what else was in store for me.
>
> -sw

We order Chinese food delivery at work at pretty routinely. One of my
friend's got a fortune cookie paper that actually had to *nerve* to say
"Why lie about your age when it is obvious" LOL LOL LOL

We tease her about it often :)

Fortune Cookie Horror
 

On Fri 30 Jan 2009 12:49:48a, Goomba told us...

> Sqwertz wrote:
>> Before I opened my individually-wrapped fortune cookie last night, I
>> read the label:
>>
>> "Bleached wheat flour, sugar, ... high fructose cyamopsis
>> tetragonoloba..."
>>
>> I put the fortune cookie down and stepped back carefully, not
>> wanting to know what else was in store for me.
>>
>> -sw
>
> We order Chinese food delivery at work at pretty routinely. One of my
> friend's got a fortune cookie paper that actually had to *nerve* to say
> "Why lie about your age when it is obvious" LOL LOL LOL
>
> We tease her about it often :)
>

That's a great line!

--
Wayne Boatwright
e-mail to wayneboatwright at gmail dot com
************************************************** **********************
Date: Friday, 01(I)/30(XXX)/09(MMIX)
************************************************** **********************
Countdown till President's Day
2wks 2dys 22hrs 46mins
************************************************** **********************
The Perspective Perspective: I'm not short -- I'm a normal person
in an over-tall world.
************************************************** **********************

Fortune Cookie Horror
 

Mark Thorson wrote:
> Sqwertz wrote:
>> Before I opened my individually-wrapped fortune cookie last night, I
>> read the label:
>>
>> "Bleached wheat flour, sugar, ... high fructose cyamopsis
>> tetragonoloba..."
>>
>> I put the fortune cookie down and stepped back carefully, not
>> wanting to know what else was in store for me.
>
> Oh, fer cryin' out loud. What a weenie!
> It's guar gum.

"God damn it, Gump! You're a god damn genius! This is the most outstanding
answer I have ever heard. You must have a goddamn I.Q. of 160. You are
goddamn gifted, Private Gump."

-sw

Fortune Cookie Horror
 

Goomba wrote:
>
> Sqwertz wrote:
> > Before I opened my individually-wrapped fortune cookie last night, I
> > read the label:
> >
> > "Bleached wheat flour, sugar, ... high fructose cyamopsis
> > tetragonoloba..."
> >
> > I put the fortune cookie down and stepped back carefully, not
> > wanting to know what else was in store for me.
> >
> > -sw
>
> We order Chinese food delivery at work at pretty routinely. One of my
> friend's got a fortune cookie paper that actually had to *nerve* to say
> "Why lie about your age when it is obvious" LOL LOL LOL
>
> We tease her about it often :)

My mother once got one that said "The greatest danger may be your
stupidity"... I think I have a scan of it around somewhere.

Fortune Cookie Horror
 

On Jan 30, 6:26*am, "Pete C." > wrote:
> Goomba wrote:
>
> > Sqwertz wrote:
> > > Before I opened my individually-wrapped fortune cookie last night, I
> > > read the label:
>
> > > "Bleached wheat flour, sugar, ... high fructose cyamopsis
> > > tetragonoloba..."
>
> > > I put the fortune cookie down and stepped back carefully, not
> > > wanting to know what else was in store for me.
>
> > > -sw
>
> > We order Chinese food delivery at work at pretty routinely. One of my
> > friend's got a fortune cookie paper that actually had to *nerve* to say
> > "Why lie about your age when it is obvious" * LOL LOL LOL
>
> > We tease her about it often :)
>
> My mother once got one that said "The greatest danger may be your
> stupidity"... I think I have a scan of it around somewhere.- Hide quoted text -
>
> - Show quoted text -

Ouch!!

Fortune Cookie Horror
 

On Thu, 29 Jan 2009 23:05:44 -0600, modom (palindrome guy) wrote:

> On Thu, 29 Jan 2009 19:44:53 -0800, Mark Thorson >
> wrote:
>
>>Sqwertz wrote:
>>>
>>> Before I opened my individually-wrapped fortune cookie last night, I
>>> read the label:
>>>
>>> "Bleached wheat flour, sugar, ... high fructose cyamopsis
>>> tetragonoloba..."
>>>
>>> I put the fortune cookie down and stepped back carefully, not
>>> wanting to know what else was in store for me.
>>
>>Oh, fer cryin' out loud. What a weenie!
>>It's guar gum.
>>
>>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guar
>
> Yabbut, who wants gum made out of these things?
> http://animals.mongabay.com/zoo/guar-01.html

maybe it's gum *for* the gaur. they're trying to quit smoking.

your pal,
blake

Fortune Cookie Horror
 

On Jan 30, 11:11 am, blake murphy > wrote:
> On Thu, 29 Jan 2009 23:05:44 -0600, modom (palindrome guy) wrote:
> > On Thu, 29 Jan 2009 19:44:53 -0800, Mark Thorson >
> > wrote:
>
> >>Sqwertz wrote:
>
> >>> Before I opened my individually-wrapped fortune cookie last night, I
> >>> read the label:
>
> >>> "Bleached wheat flour, sugar, ... high fructose cyamopsis
> >>> tetragonoloba..."
>
> >>> I put the fortune cookie down and stepped back carefully, not
> >>> wanting to know what else was in store for me.
>
> >>Oh, fer cryin' out loud. What a weenie!
> >>It's guar gum.
>
> >>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guar
>
> > Yabbut, who wants gum made out of these things?
> >http://animals.mongabay.com/zoo/guar-01.html
>
> maybe it's gum *for* the gaur. they're trying to quit smoking.
>
> your pal,
> blake

Yes, but are they in pre-contemplation, contemplation, or
preparation? It's important to identify the exact readiness to
quit ....

E. (hung up on corporate speak)

Fortune Cookie Horror
 

Goomba wrote:
>
> We order Chinese food delivery at work at pretty routinely. One of my
> friend's got a fortune cookie paper that actually had to *nerve* to say
> "Why lie about your age when it is obvious" LOL LOL LOL
>
> We tease her about it often :)

Just another reason to do what I do.

When eating at a Chinese restaurant with others,
if fortune cookies are served at the end, I refuse
to eat mine or even pick it up. Drives some people
nuts, who want to see the fortune.

"You can have it."

"No, it's your fortune. You opened it."

Fortune Cookie Horror
 

On Fri, 30 Jan 2009 10:58:44 -0800 (PST), Nancy2 wrote:

> On Jan 30, 11:11 am, blake murphy > wrote:
>> On Thu, 29 Jan 2009 23:05:44 -0600, modom (palindrome guy) wrote:
>>> On Thu, 29 Jan 2009 19:44:53 -0800, Mark Thorson >
>>> wrote:
>>
>>>>Sqwertz wrote:
>>
>>>>> Before I opened my individually-wrapped fortune cookie last night, I
>>>>> read the label:
>>
>>>>> "Bleached wheat flour, sugar, ... high fructose cyamopsis
>>>>> tetragonoloba..."
>>
>>>>> I put the fortune cookie down and stepped back carefully, not
>>>>> wanting to know what else was in store for me.
>>
>>>>Oh, fer cryin' out loud. What a weenie!
>>>>It's guar gum.
>>
>>>>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guar
>>
>>> Yabbut, who wants gum made out of these things?
>>>http://animals.mongabay.com/zoo/guar-01.html
>>
>> maybe it's gum *for* the gaur. they're trying to quit smoking.
>>
>> your pal,
>> blake
>
> Yes, but are they in pre-contemplation, contemplation, or
> preparation? It's important to identify the exact readiness to
> quit ....
>
> E. (hung up on corporate speak)

i assume it's the expense. it's tough out there for guars.

your pal,
blake

Fortune Cookie Horror
 

On Fri, 30 Jan 2009 13:57:16 -0800, Mark Thorson wrote:

> Goomba wrote:
>>
>> We order Chinese food delivery at work at pretty routinely. One of my
>> friend's got a fortune cookie paper that actually had to *nerve* to say
>> "Why lie about your age when it is obvious" LOL LOL LOL
>>
>> We tease her about it often :)
>
> Just another reason to do what I do.
>
> When eating at a Chinese restaurant with others,
> if fortune cookies are served at the end, I refuse
> to eat mine or even pick it up. Drives some people
> nuts, who want to see the fortune.
>
> "You can have it."
>
> "No, it's your fortune. You opened it."

i thought the doctrine there was that it's *your* fortune, but you don't
have to eat the cookie. i open mine and give the cookie to my girlfriend.

your pal,
blake

Fortune Cookie Horror
 

On Jan 31, 12:09*pm, blake murphy > wrote:
> On Fri, 30 Jan 2009 13:57:16 -0800, Mark Thorson wrote:
> > Goomba wrote:
>
> >> We order Chinese food delivery at work at pretty routinely. One of my
> >> friend's got a fortune cookie paper that actually had to *nerve* to say
> >> "Why lie about your age when it is obvious" * LOL LOL LOL
>
> >> We tease her about it often :)
>
> > Just another reason to do what I do.
>
> > When eating at a Chinese restaurant with others,
> > if fortune cookies are served at the end, I refuse
> > to eat mine or even pick it up. *Drives some people
> > nuts, who want to see the fortune.
>
> > "You can have it."
>
> > "No, it's your fortune. *You opened it."
>
> i thought the doctrine there was that it's *your* fortune, but you don't
> have to eat the cookie. *i open mine and give the cookie to my girlfriend.
>
> your pal,
> blake

===============================================
I have the last fortune I got stuck to my monitor- it says
"Share your abundant humor with others at this time. They need it."

Lynn in Fargo
Custom here is NOT to pick your own fortune. Pick someone else's and
swap before you open. Don't ask me why, don't know!

Fortune Cookie Horror
 

On Jan 31, 11:32*am, Lynn from Fargo > wrote:
> On Jan 31, 12:09*pm, blake murphy > wrote:
>
>
>
> > On Fri, 30 Jan 2009 13:57:16 -0800, Mark Thorson wrote:
> > > Goomba wrote:
>
> > >> We order Chinese food delivery at work at pretty routinely. One of my
> > >> friend's got a fortunecookiepaper that actually had to *nerve* to say
> > >> "Why lie about your age when it is obvious" * LOL LOL LOL
>
> > >> We tease her about it often :)
>
> > > Just another reason to do what I do.
>
> > > When eating at a Chinese restaurant with others,
> > > if fortune cookies are served at the end, I refuse
> > > to eat mine or even pick it up. *Drives some people
> > > nuts, who want to see the fortune.
>
> > > "You can have it."
>
> > > "No, it's your fortune. *You opened it."
>
> > i thought the doctrine there was that it's *your* fortune, but you don't
> > have to eat thecookie. *i open mine and give thecookieto my girlfriend.
>
> > your pal,
> > blake
>
> ===============================================
> I have the last fortune I got stuck to my monitor- it says
> "Share your abundant humor with others at this time. *They need it."
>
> Lynn in Fargo
> Custom here is NOT to pick your own fortune. Pick someone else's and
> swap before you open. Don't ask me why, don't know!

From the desk of Scott Fiore