http://www.recfoodcooking.com

Thanks go to gloria p for 'inspiring' this survey. Something she
mentioned in another thread gave me the idea...

BTW, she had absolutely nothing to do with writing it up, so you can't
blame her for any spelling mistakes, grammatical errors, stupid
questions etc. That you can take up with me; but please remember you
won't be getting any extra TFH's for doing so. <veg>

Oh, and for anybody who wants to know:
MCINL = My Choice Is Not Listed
TFH = Tin Foil Hat
--
Cheers
Chatty Cathy

On Apr 9, 6:14*am, ChattyCathy > wrote:

> TFH = Tin Foil Hat

I got my first! Wooooot!

--Lin

Lin wrote:

> On Apr 9, 6:14Â*am, ChattyCathy > wrote:
>
>> TFH = Tin Foil Hat
>
> I got my first! Wooooot!
>
> --Lin

Obviously the Early Bird gets the TFH.

Decided which one you want yet? ;-)
--
Cheers
Chatty Cathy
"Sorry Dear, dinner is late, had to reboot the stove." -mrr

ChattyCathy wrote on Thu, 09 Apr 2009 15:14:52 +0200:

> Thanks go to gloria p for 'inspiring' this survey. Something
> she mentioned in another thread gave me the idea...

> BTW, she had absolutely nothing to do with writing it up, so
> you can't blame her for any spelling mistakes, grammatical
> errors, stupid questions etc. That you can take up with me;
> but please remember you won't be getting any extra TFH's for
> doing so. <veg>

> Oh, and for anybody who wants to know:
> MCINL = My Choice Is Not Listed
> TFH = Tin Foil Hat

A punctilious bunch, I see. My personal preference is to arrive a few
minutes after the stated times and also expect guests to do the same.
I've practically never brought small gifts or flowers even on a first
invitation but I almost always bring a bottle of decent wine. I don't
necessarily expect the hosts to open and serve it then and there tho'
they usually do so. However, there are places in Europe where bringing
flowers is traditional and I go along with that.
--

James Silverton
Potomac, Maryland

Email, with obvious alterations: not.jim.silverton.at.verizon.not

"ChattyCathy" > wrote in message
...
> http://www.recfoodcooking.com
>
> Thanks go to gloria p for 'inspiring' this survey. Something she
> mentioned in another thread gave me the idea...
>
> BTW, she had absolutely nothing to do with writing it up, so you can't
> blame her for any spelling mistakes, grammatical errors, stupid
> questions etc. That you can take up with me; but please remember you
> won't be getting any extra TFH's for doing so. <veg>
>
> Oh, and for anybody who wants to know:
> MCINL = My Choice Is Not Listed
> TFH = Tin Foil Hat
> --
> Cheers
> Chatty Cathy

Q You arrive right on time, only to find that your host(s) is/are in the
shower or not even that far along yet Do you feel?


A. I would feel they are operating on Mexico City timing. Minimum
"fashionably late" so as to make an entrance.

:-)

Dimitri

James Silverton wrote:

>
> A punctilious bunch, I see. My personal preference is to arrive a few
> minutes after the stated times and also expect guests to do the same.
> I've practically never brought small gifts or flowers even on a first
> invitation but I almost always bring a bottle of decent wine. I don't
> necessarily expect the hosts to open and serve it then and there tho'
> they usually do so. However, there are places in Europe where bringing
> flowers is traditional and I go along with that.


Maybe it is a family trait. My parents were always on time, and my
brothers and I tend to be on time. OTOH, my father in law was always
prompt, but I think my wife and her siblings rebelled and tend to run late.

If I am booking a meal for people I invite them to come in time to have
a drink or two before dinner. I don't mind if they come a little late,
but I don't want a roast ruined because someone arrives too late.


There are two people who I refuse to invite anymore. One is a friend of
my wife. She lives about a mile and a half from us. One time we called
and extended a last minute invitation for dinner. It was 4 pm and we
invited her for drinks at 5, dinner at 6. At 6:30 she still wasn't
here. instead of heading over here, she headed to a crafts show in a
town 15 miles way..... that closed at 5. Another time, she was hanging
around here and we were doing a roast and invited her to stay for
supper. She had to go home and feed her cat. This is the same cat that
she would leave home alone for days at a time. She didn't come back for
hours. She could have driven home, fed the cat and been back in 10 minutes.

The worst was my late BiL's girlfriend. We had invited her for
Thanksgiving dinnner along with my parents and my wife's aunt and uncle.
Usual deal, drinks at 5 dinner at 6. My mother and my wife's uncle
were both diabetic and needed to eat at regular hours. We held things up
when she didn't show by 6. Everything was pretty well ready but I held
things for a bit. As 6:30 We started dishing up and I started carving
the roast. She phoned and said that she wasn't feeling well and could
someone please come and pick her up.


Sorry, but it was more than a half hour drive to her place, and there
is no way I was going to leave my guests for over an hour to go and pick
her up. If she wanted that, she should have called a few hours earlier.
I politely told her that we would have to have her over another time,
but there is no way I am inviting her again.

ChattyCathy wrote:
> http://www.recfoodcooking.com
>
> Thanks go to gloria p for 'inspiring' this survey. Something she
> mentioned in another thread gave me the idea...

Maybe I'm wrong, but to me, dinner party means be punctual.
Some people really mean it, dinner is at 8. Whatever. You
walk in, dinner is ready. Who knows, maybe even the food
will be ready early an they are anxious to get it on the table.
Whatever, I would be on time for a dinner party, not that they
are big with my friends.

A party, that's a different matter. I would arrive around the
time given, not kill myself trying to be on time to the minute.
Not an hour late, though, either.

nancy

On Thu, 09 Apr 2009 13:50:27 +0000, James Silverton wrote:

> A punctilious bunch, I see. My personal preference is to arrive a few
> minutes after the stated times and also expect guests to do the same.
> I've practically never brought small gifts or flowers even on a first
> invitation but I almost always bring a bottle of decent wine. I don't
> necessarily expect the hosts to open and serve it then and there tho'
> they usually do so. However, there are places in Europe where bringing
> flowers is traditional and I go along with that.

I like to get to dinner parties I'm invited to on time, I feel it's just
good mannered to do so.

Not that it happens much around here - haven't been to one in years. We
usually get invited to much more casual affairs. But if I got 'all dressed
up' and arrived at the appointed time - only to discover my hosts were
still in the shower and was rudely told that "Oh, yeah. You guys are
always on time." like *I* was at fault, I would not be impressed.

--
Cheers
Chatty Cathy

ChattyCathy wrote on Thu, 09 Apr 2009 17:09:54 +0200:

>> A punctilious bunch, I see. My personal preference is to
>> arrive a few minutes after the stated times and also expect
>> guests to do the same. I've practically never brought small
>> gifts or flowers even on a first invitation but I almost
>> always bring a bottle of decent wine. I don't necessarily
>> expect the hosts to open and serve it then and there
>> tho' they usually do so. However, there are places in Europe
>> where bringing flowers is traditional and I go along with
>> that.

> I like to get to dinner parties I'm invited to on time, I feel
> it's just good mannered to do so.

> Not that it happens much around here - haven't been to one in
> years. We usually get invited to much more casual affairs. But
> if I got 'all dressed up' and arrived at the appointed time -
> only to discover my hosts were still in the shower and was
> rudely told that "Oh, yeah. You guys are always on time." like
> *I* was at fault, I would not be impressed.

It's something that is not just personal liking but local custom. There
are places where the hosts would be embarrassed if you arrived right on
time and others where punctuality is hoped for.

--

James Silverton
Potomac, Maryland

Email, with obvious alterations: not.jim.silverton.at.verizon.not

James Silverton wrote:

> It's something that is not just personal liking but local custom. There
> are places where the hosts would be embarrassed if you arrived right on
> time and others where punctuality is hoped for.



Then there are the cases of people being known to be prompt and those
who are known to be tardy. I used to be able to set my watch by my
father's timing. If I invited them for 5 pm Dad would pull in the
driveway at 5 pm. OTOH, there are people like my late (in more ways than
one) brother in law. When my MiL wanted to served dinner at 6 she would
tell him dinner was 5. He would still be late, and dinner would have to
be held.

I had a friend who extremely anal about time, and didn't like his
stepson and family being late. He would tell them what time dinner was
and then serve it at that time if they were there or not. If they came
late, they didn't get fed.

I typically arrive an hour or so early and help with the last minute
prep.

On Thu, 09 Apr 2009 15:13:01 +0000, James Silverton wrote:

> It's something that is not just personal liking but local custom. There
> are places where the hosts would be embarrassed if you arrived right on
> time and others where punctuality is hoped for.

Of course you are quite correct, and I do understand that there are
certain countries/regions where it is 'fashionable to be late' - but where
I live is not one of them. But how late does one have to be to remain
'fashionable' and yet not overdo it and offend the hosts anyway? Is there
some sort of limit? ;-)


--
Cheers
Chatty Cathy

"ChattyCathy" > wrote in message
...
> On Thu, 09 Apr 2009 13:50:27 +0000, James Silverton wrote:
>
>> A punctilious bunch, I see. My personal preference is to arrive a few
>> minutes after the stated times and also expect guests to do the same.
>> I've practically never brought small gifts or flowers even on a first
>> invitation but I almost always bring a bottle of decent wine. I don't
>> necessarily expect the hosts to open and serve it then and there tho'
>> they usually do so. However, there are places in Europe where bringing
>> flowers is traditional and I go along with that.
>
> I like to get to dinner parties I'm invited to on time, I feel it's just
> good mannered to do so.
>
> Not that it happens much around here - haven't been to one in years. We
> usually get invited to much more casual affairs. But if I got 'all dressed
> up' and arrived at the appointed time - only to discover my hosts were
> still in the shower and was rudely told that "Oh, yeah. You guys are
> always on time." like *I* was at fault, I would not be impressed.


They were both in the shower, so who let you in, the dog? Depending, I
might pour a couple 2nis and join her.

"Nancy Young" > wrote in message
...
> ChattyCathy wrote:
>> http://www.recfoodcooking.com
>>
>> Thanks go to gloria p for 'inspiring' this survey. Something she
>> mentioned in another thread gave me the idea...
>
> Maybe I'm wrong, but to me, dinner party means be punctual.
> Some people really mean it, dinner is at 8. Whatever. You walk in,
> dinner is ready. Who knows, maybe even the food
> will be ready early an they are anxious to get it on the table.
> Whatever, I would be on time for a dinner party, not that they
> are big with my friends.
> A party, that's a different matter. I would arrive around the
> time given, not kill myself trying to be on time to the minute.
> Not an hour late, though, either.
>
>
I've not ever been invited to a dinner party that I wasn't informed there
would be an hour or so for mingling and cocktails before being seated for
dinner. I know I would never give invitations specifing arrive at 7 PM to
fress.

"James Silverton" > wrote in message
...
> ChattyCathy wrote on Thu, 09 Apr 2009 17:09:54 +0200:
>
>>> A punctilious bunch, I see. My personal preference is to
>>> arrive a few minutes after the stated times and also expect
>>> guests to do the same. I've practically never brought small
>>> gifts or flowers even on a first invitation but I almost
>>> always bring a bottle of decent wine. I don't necessarily
>>> expect the hosts to open and serve it then and there
>>> tho' they usually do so. However, there are places in Europe
>>> where bringing flowers is traditional and I go along with
>>> that.
>
>> I like to get to dinner parties I'm invited to on time, I feel
>> it's just good mannered to do so.
>
>> Not that it happens much around here - haven't been to one in
>> years. We usually get invited to much more casual affairs. But
>> if I got 'all dressed up' and arrived at the appointed time -
>> only to discover my hosts were still in the shower and was
>> rudely told that "Oh, yeah. You guys are always on time." like
>> *I* was at fault, I would not be impressed.
>
> It's something that is not just personal liking but local custom. There
> are places where the hosts would be embarrassed if you arrived right on
> time and others where punctuality is hoped for.
>
There are also places where it's rude to refuse an invititation. A
colleague was in Thailand (I think - anyway in that area) and a senior govt
official invited him to a party at his house. He also heard the official
ask a lot of colleagues who all accepted. On the night, very few turned up
but the official had expected that and planned accordingly.

On Thu, 09 Apr 2009 10:26:37 -0500, Pete C. wrote:


> I typically arrive an hour or so early and help with the last minute
> prep.

Ah. Very nice of you to do that... but the older I get, the more I prefer
to do my own thing in my kitchen. I don't mind early arrivals chatting to
me while I'm in my kitchen, but they must please stay out of my way when
it comes to the actual prep/cooking. Only person I can share the cooking
with these days is DH. We know where everything is without having to ask,
we don't get in each other's way - and he is better at doing some things
as I am at others - so it works out just fine.

--
Cheers
Chatty Cathy

On Thu, 09 Apr 2009 15:35:35 +0000, brooklyn1 wrote:

>
> They were both in the shower, so who let you in, the dog?

Of course. Lassie still has living descendants, ya know.

> Depending, I
> might pour a couple 2nis and join her.

<laugh> Why am I not surprised?

--
Cheers
Chatty Cathy

"Pete C." > ha scritto nel messaggio
ster.com...
>
> I typically arrive an hour or so early and help with the last minute
> prep.

Gee thanks, Pete. At my house that will be shaving my legs and applying
mascara and I am bad at both.

On Thu, 09 Apr 2009 15:43:07 +0000, brooklyn1 wrote:

>
> I've not ever been invited to a dinner party that I wasn't informed there
> would be an hour or so for mingling and cocktails before being seated for
> dinner. I know I would never give invitations specifing arrive at 7 PM to
> fress.

'fress'. Had to google that. I'd guess that Dave's Big Niece
wouldn't have to look it up, though... hehe

--
Cheers
Chatty Cathy

ChattyCathy wrote on Thu, 09 Apr 2009 17:59:42 +0200:

>> I've not ever been invited to a dinner party that I wasn't
>> informed there would be an hour or so for mingling and
>> cocktails before being seated for dinner. I know I would
>> never give invitations specifing arrive at 7 PM to fress.

> 'fress'. Had to google that. I'd guess that Dave's Big Niece
> wouldn't have to look it up, though... hehe

Have you ever seen the invitations that say something like "7:30 for 8"
to indicate the mingling and that you won't eat before 8?

Incidentally, could some German speaker tell me what the difference is
between "essen" and "fressen"? I believe fressen in intransitive and
essen transitive but why bother with the two words?

--

James Silverton
Potomac, Maryland

Email, with obvious alterations: not.jim.silverton.at.verizon.not

James Silverton wrote:

> ChattyCathy wrote on Thu, 09 Apr 2009 17:59:42 +0200:
>
>>> I've not ever been invited to a dinner party that I wasn't
>>> informed there would be an hour or so for mingling and
>>> cocktails before being seated for dinner. I know I would
>>> never give invitations specifing arrive at 7 PM to fress.
>
>> 'fress'. Had to google that. I'd guess that Dave's Big Niece
>> wouldn't have to look it up, though... hehe
>
> Have you ever seen the invitations that say something like "7:30 for
> 8" to indicate the mingling and that you won't eat before 8?

As a matter of fact, I have. Much more sensible than saying "8pm", IMO.
--
Cheers
Chatty Cathy

On Apr 9, 9:14*am, ChattyCathy > wrote:
> http://www.recfoodcooking.com
>
> Thanks go to gloria p for 'inspiring' this survey. Something she
> mentioned in another thread gave me the idea...
>
> BTW, she had absolutely nothing to do with writing it up, so you can't
> blame her for any spelling mistakes, grammatical errors, stupid
> questions etc. That you can take up with me; but please remember you
> won't be getting any extra TFH's for doing so. <veg>
>
> Oh, and for anybody who wants to know:
> MCINL = My Choice Is Not Listed
> TFH = Tin Foil Hat
> --
> Cheers
> Chatty Cathy

About the taking of a small gift: depends. If it's an overnighter
and the hosts are putting on a major meal, like Xmas, a small gift is
a must in my book. If it's a come on over for hamburgers from the
guys I see all the time down the block, no.

The gift is something they will use soon and not have to store e.g.
wine or a nice candle.

On Apr 9, 12:08*pm, "James Silverton" >
wrote:
> *ChattyCathy *wrote *on Thu, 09 Apr 2009 17:59:42 +0200:
>
> >> I've not ever been invited to a dinner party that I wasn't
> >> informed there would be an hour or so for mingling and
> >> cocktails before being seated for dinner. *I know I would
> >> never give invitations specifing arrive at 7 PM to fress.
> > 'fress'. Had to google that. I'd guess that Dave's Big Niece
> > wouldn't have to look it up, though... hehe
>
> Have you ever seen the invitations that say something like "7:30 for 8"
> to indicate the mingling and that you won't eat before 8?
>
> Incidentally, could some German speaker tell me what the difference is
> between "essen" and "fressen"? I believe fressen in intransitive and
> essen transitive but why bother with the two words?
>
> --
>
> James Silverton
> Potomac, Maryland
>
> Email, with obvious alterations: not.jim.silverton.at.verizon.not

People 'essen', animals 'fressen'. There is also another verb 'to
feed animals' but it doesn't surface in this old brain right now.

wrote on Thu, 9 Apr 2009 09:35:45 -0700
(PDT):

> On Apr 9, 12:08 pm, "James Silverton" >
> wrote:
>> ChattyCathy wrote on Thu, 09 Apr 2009 17:59:42 +0200:
>>
> >>> I've not ever been invited to a dinner party that I wasn't
> >>> informed there would be an hour or so for mingling and
> >>> cocktails before being seated for dinner. I know I would
> >>> never give invitations specifing arrive at 7 PM to fress.
> >> 'fress'. Had to google that. I'd guess that Dave's Big
> >> Niece wouldn't have to look it up, though... hehe
>>
>> Have you ever seen the invitations that say something like
>> "7:30 for 8" to indicate the mingling and that you won't eat
>> before 8?
>>
>> Incidentally, could some German speaker tell me what the
>> difference is between "essen" and "fressen"? I believe
>> fressen in intransitive and essen transitive but why bother
>> with the two words?
>>

Thanks, my German is very basic outside reading science but, now that
you mention it, I seem to remember something about not using "fressen"
for people. My dictionaries just gave the meaning "eat" for both words.

--

James Silverton
Potomac, Maryland

Email, with obvious alterations: not.jim.silverton.at.verizon.not

wrote:

>
> About the taking of a small gift: depends. If it's an overnighter
> and the hosts are putting on a major meal, like Xmas, a small gift is
> a must in my book. If it's a come on over for hamburgers from the
> guys I see all the time down the block, no.
>
> The gift is something they will use soon and not have to store e.g.
> wine or a nice candle.

Gifts are nice, but they need to be useful. Our neighbours are very nice
people. The travel a lot and we gladly bring in their mail, newspapers,
feed the cat etc. It's not problem. Every time they come back they bring
us a gift. Some of them are really nice, some okay, but really not much
use. I hate to throw them out. We don't have a lot of storage space.
Considering that they go away 5-6 times a year, this stuff is starting
to pile up.

"ChattyCathy" > wrote in message
...
> http://www.recfoodcooking.com
>
> Thanks go to gloria p for 'inspiring' this survey. Something she
> mentioned in another thread gave me the idea...
>
> BTW, she had absolutely nothing to do with writing it up, so you can't
> blame her for any spelling mistakes, grammatical errors, stupid
> questions etc. That you can take up with me; but please remember you
> won't be getting any extra TFH's for doing so. <veg>
>
> --
> Cheers
> Chatty Cathy



If someone invited me to dinner for 7PM and they were still in the shower at
that time I'd have to say they're socially inept. If you invite guests you
should be ready to receive them by the specified time. If guests show up an
hour early that's a different story

Jill

ChattyCathy wrote:
> http://www.recfoodcooking.com

I think timing is rather critical for a dinner party. If I am going
through the trouble to create a nice table and cook some of my specialty
dishes, I am going to be allocating my time pretty carefully. I usually
have a schedule so that everything comes together at the right time. The
meat gets to rest before carving, the bread is fresh, the salad crisp,
etc. Even half an hour either way can change the outcome.

Because I know how critical timing is to the preparation of a great
meal, I am sensitive to the timing of those who are inviting me to their
table.

Just the TCW from an OCD.

--
Janet Wilder
way-the-heck-south Texas
spelling doesn't count
but cooking does

"James Silverton" > wrote in message
...
> wrote on Thu, 9 Apr 2009 09:35:45 -0700 (PDT):
>
>> On Apr 9, 12:08 pm, "James Silverton" >
>> wrote:
>>> ChattyCathy wrote on Thu, 09 Apr 2009 17:59:42 +0200:
>>>
>> >>> I've not ever been invited to a dinner party that I wasn't
>> >>> informed there would be an hour or so for mingling and
>> >>> cocktails before being seated for dinner. I know I would
>> >>> never give invitations specifing arrive at 7 PM to fress.
>> >> 'fress'. Had to google that. I'd guess that Dave's Big
>> >> Niece wouldn't have to look it up, though... hehe
>>>
>>> Have you ever seen the invitations that say something like
>>> "7:30 for 8" to indicate the mingling and that you won't eat
>>> before 8?
>>>
>>> Incidentally, could some German speaker tell me what the
>>> difference is between "essen" and "fressen"? I believe
>>> fressen in intransitive and essen transitive but why bother
>>> with the two words?
>>>
>
> Thanks, my German is very basic outside reading science but, now that you
> mention it, I seem to remember something about not using "fressen" for
> people. My dictionaries just gave the meaning "eat" for both words.
>
>
Essen is Eat!, as in mine kinde (child).

Fressen is Eat!!!, like the proverbial fehrd (horse).

Dave Smith wrote:
> wrote:
>
>>
>> About the taking of a small gift: depends. If it's an overnighter
>> and the hosts are putting on a major meal, like Xmas, a small gift is
>> a must in my book. If it's a come on over for hamburgers from the
>> guys I see all the time down the block, no.
>>
>> The gift is something they will use soon and not have to store e.g.
>> wine or a nice candle.
>
> Gifts are nice, but they need to be useful. Our neighbours are very nice
> people. The travel a lot and we gladly bring in their mail, newspapers,
> feed the cat etc. It's not problem. Every time they come back they bring
> us a gift. Some of them are really nice, some okay, but really not much
> use. I hate to throw them out. We don't have a lot of storage space.
> Considering that they go away 5-6 times a year, this stuff is starting
> to pile up.

Re-gift them. Charity functions can always use nice things for silent
auctions or such.

--
Janet Wilder
way-the-heck-south Texas
spelling doesn't count
but cooking does

Pete C. wrote:
> I typically arrive an hour or so early and help with the last minute
> prep.

You are lucky to have friends who would appreciate that. I'd hate you.
When I'm hell-bent on doing up a big meal, I don't want any living thing
in my kitchen except me. (and maybe the puppy because his food and water
are there)

--
Janet Wilder
way-the-heck-south Texas
spelling doesn't count
but cooking does

"Janet Wilder" > wrote in message
...
> ChattyCathy wrote:
>> http://www.recfoodcooking.com
>
> I think timing is rather critical for a dinner party. If I am going
> through the trouble to create a nice table and cook some of my specialty
> dishes, I am going to be allocating my time pretty carefully. I usually
> have a schedule so that everything comes together at the right time. The
> meat gets to rest before carving, the bread is fresh, the salad crisp,
> etc. Even half an hour either way can change the outcome.
>
> Because I know how critical timing is to the preparation of a great meal,
> I am sensitive to the timing of those who are inviting me to their table.
>

You need to realize that many here place the emphasis on "party"... the
dinner part is insignificant... and you don't need any stinkin' timing for a
trough of mac n' cheese and a tub of tuna 'shroom soup caserole.

In article >,
ChattyCathy > wrote:

> http://www.recfoodcooking.com
>
> Thanks go to gloria p for 'inspiring' this survey. Something she
> mentioned in another thread gave me the idea...
>
> BTW, she had absolutely nothing to do with writing it up, so you can't
> blame her for any spelling mistakes, grammatical errors, stupid
> questions etc. That you can take up with me; but please remember you
> won't be getting any extra TFH's for doing so. <veg>
>
> Oh, and for anybody who wants to know:
> MCINL = My Choice Is Not Listed
> TFH = Tin Foil Hat
> --
> Cheers
> Chatty Cathy

Ok, that one was highly amusing. ;-)

I'm way to flexible to have gone with the majority this time!
--
Peace! Om

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass.
It's about learning to dance in the rain.
-- Anon.

In article >,
"James Silverton" > wrote:

> ChattyCathy wrote on Thu, 09 Apr 2009 15:14:52 +0200:
>
> > Thanks go to gloria p for 'inspiring' this survey. Something
> > she mentioned in another thread gave me the idea...
>
> > BTW, she had absolutely nothing to do with writing it up, so
> > you can't blame her for any spelling mistakes, grammatical
> > errors, stupid questions etc. That you can take up with me;
> > but please remember you won't be getting any extra TFH's for
> > doing so. <veg>
>
> > Oh, and for anybody who wants to know:
> > MCINL = My Choice Is Not Listed
> > TFH = Tin Foil Hat
>
> A punctilious bunch, I see. My personal preference is to arrive a few
> minutes after the stated times and also expect guests to do the same.
> I've practically never brought small gifts or flowers even on a first
> invitation but I almost always bring a bottle of decent wine. I don't
> necessarily expect the hosts to open and serve it then and there tho'
> they usually do so. However, there are places in Europe where bringing
> flowers is traditional and I go along with that.

Last time I went to a dinner party, I was the ONLY one to bring a "host
gift". I brought a nice bottle of wine wrapped in a bandana. (The party
was hosted by our Animal Husbandry Professor back when I was in college,
it was an end of semester party) and he wore the bandanna around his
neck the rest of the night and thanked me. ;-)

I was amused and gratified.

Of course, this was the same party where I was introduced to calf
fries... <g>

My parents taught me to always bring a "host gift".

YMMV as always.
--
Peace! Om

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass.
It's about learning to dance in the rain.
-- Anon.

On Thu, 09 Apr 2009 15:14:52 +0200, ChattyCathy
> wrote:

>http://www.recfoodcooking.com
>
>Thanks go to gloria p for 'inspiring' this survey. Something she
>mentioned in another thread gave me the idea...
>
>BTW, she had absolutely nothing to do with writing it up, so you can't
>blame her for any spelling mistakes, grammatical errors, stupid
>questions etc. That you can take up with me; but please remember you
>won't be getting any extra TFH's for doing so. <veg>
>
>Oh, and for anybody who wants to know:
>MCINL = My Choice Is Not Listed
>TFH = Tin Foil Hat

If somebody invites me for a meal I'll try to be there on time at the
time they asked me to be. There's a reason they chose that particular
time and not half an hour earlier or later. Dh always insists on being
places at least half an hour early 'just in case' and it drives me up
the wall!

"Kajikit" > wrote in message
...
> On Thu, 09 Apr 2009 15:14:52 +0200, ChattyCathy
> > wrote:
>
>>http://www.recfoodcooking.com
>>
>>Thanks go to gloria p for 'inspiring' this survey. Something she
>>mentioned in another thread gave me the idea...
>>
>>BTW, she had absolutely nothing to do with writing it up, so you can't
>>blame her for any spelling mistakes, grammatical errors, stupid
>>questions etc. That you can take up with me; but please remember you
>>won't be getting any extra TFH's for doing so. <veg>
>>
>>Oh, and for anybody who wants to know:
>>MCINL = My Choice Is Not Listed
>>TFH = Tin Foil Hat
>
> If somebody invites me for a meal I'll try to be there on time at the
> time they asked me to be. There's a reason they chose that particular
> time and not half an hour earlier or later. Dh always insists on being
> places at least half an hour early 'just in case' and it drives me up
> the wall!

I have a few friends that like show up early to 'help' (read: start
drinking early) when I'm throwing a party. It usually ****ed me off since I
usually cook and prepare for the party and leave myself 45 minutes to shave
and shower before the start time. I finally had a little heart-to-heart with
them.

My step-daughter shows up early these days but she really does get to work
when she arrives. That's a lot different.

Jon

Zeppo wrote:
>
> I have a few friends that like show up early to 'help' (read: start
> drinking early) when I'm throwing a party. It usually ****ed me off since I
> usually cook and prepare for the party and leave myself 45 minutes to shave
> and shower before the start time. I finally had a little heart-to-heart with
> them.
>
> My step-daughter shows up early these days but she really does get to work
> when she arrives. That's a lot different.


I have a similar problem with Big Niece showing up early at family
functions. She just loves to help out in the kitchen, which usually
turns out to be her parking herself in the middle of the room and
sampling. She has once showed up at her step sister's place when the SS
was having a dinner party, and BN at all the food before the other
guests arrived. We always invite the others to come earlier than BN so
that there will be food for them.

"ChattyCathy" wrote
> James Silverton wrote:

>> It's something that is not just personal liking but local custom. There
>> are places where the hosts would be embarrassed if you arrived right on
>> time and others where punctuality is hoped for.
>
> Of course you are quite correct, and I do understand that there are
> certain countries/regions where it is 'fashionable to be late' - but where
> I live is not one of them. But how late does one have to be to remain
> 'fashionable' and yet not overdo it and offend the hosts anyway? Is there
> some sort of limit? ;-)

Depends on the affair. If it's a big fancy dinner party at a local
restraunt, be on time or a slight bit early. Call if going to be more than
15 mins late.

If it's a backyard BBQ at my house, folks call if going to be more than 30
mins late but the big ones last 4-6 hours so it's not a big issue unless the
person was bringing something critical (like all the sodas etc).

With our little neighborhood stuff, if we say 'dinner at 5' we mean we plan
to serve at just about then. Folks start showing up 45-30 mins before 5 and
expect me to be in the kitchen. They just gather about the table and chat
and have hot tea or coffee til it's time to eat. If someone calls running
late, depending on the meal type and if it can wait, we will or we just
rewarm theirs when they get there if needed (grin).

cshenk wrote on Thu, 9 Apr 2009 17:17:40 -0400:

> If it's a backyard BBQ at my house, folks call if going to be more
> than 30 mins late but the big ones last 4-6 hours so it's
> not a big issue unless the person was bringing something
> critical (like all the sodas etc).

> Folks start showing up 45-30 mins before 5 and expect me to be in the
> kitchen. They just gather about the table and chat and have hot tea
> or coffee til it's time to eat.

You don't have beer or better at BBQ's? Thanks but no thanks for the
invitation! :-)

--

James Silverton
Potomac, Maryland

Email, with obvious alterations: not.jim.silverton.at.verizon.not

> wrote

>About the taking of a small gift: depends. If it's an overnighter
>and the hosts are putting on a major meal, like Xmas, a small gift is
>a must in my book. If it's a come on over for hamburgers from the
>guys I see all the time down the block, no.

Grin! Not at my place! Then again, these are just little weekly stuff and
folks can't go broke doing them. We bring *food* items normally. Something
we know the neighbor will like or have use for.

We have a BBQ in the plans at anothers this weekend if the weather holds.
There's 14 people expected. None of us expect the host to supply steaks and
chicken etc for 14! We do this almost weekly so that gets absurd after a
bit.

He's got 10 chicken thighs. I told him I have 2 bangus (umm, english, milk
fish?). Another has some decent sausages (3 lbs or so) and a 10lb bag of
apples. Another offered up a jar of honey and we added 1 lb butter and some
spices for baked apples. 2 of the others are doing a bean pot and one is
doing home made bread rolls (not me this time).

I told'em I'm out of mayo but have the rest of the fixings for a cole slaw
so one of them offered up a jar of mayo and some pickles.

Lots of little bits gathering. We do it too often to worry if there's not
enouhg of each item for all, just that there's enough for all in the end.

>The gift is something they will use soon and not have to store e.g.
>wine or a nice candle.

Hehe we aint so fancy. Last time, my 'gift' was a pile of fresh green beans
and a few onions they needed to finish off a meal idea they had.

"James Silverton" wrote
> cshenk wrote on Thu, 9 Apr 2009 17:17:40 -0400:
>
>> If it's a backyard BBQ at my house, folks call if going to be more than
>> 30 mins late but the big ones last 4-6 hours so it's
>> not a big issue unless the person was bringing something
>> critical (like all the sodas etc).
>
>> Folks start showing up 45-30 mins before 5 and expect me to be in the
>> kitchen. They just gather about the table and chat and have hot tea or
>> coffee til it's time to eat.
>
> You don't have beer or better at BBQ's? Thanks but no thanks for the
> invitation! :-)

Hehe BYOB plus a few. Once a year, we arrange with the city to have a block
party where the street is blocked off and we have the kegs in some yards,
and others are 'free zones for the kids with no alcohol in there'. We
usually end up that because we have great outdoor flood lights so they can
play volly ball and stuff later at night (teens, the party may extend well
past dark if it's the block party).