BBQ RULES

You are about to enter the BBQ season, you good folks in the Northern
parts of God's earth, Therefore it is important to refresh your memory
on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity.

When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put
into motion:

The Routine...

(1) The woman buys the food.

(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.

(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with
the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is
lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.

(4) The woman remains outside the compulsory three meter exclusion zone
where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding activities can
take place without the interference of the woman.

Here comes the important part:

(5) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

More routine...

(6) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.

(7) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking great. He
thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he flips the meat.

Important again:

(8) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
More routine...

(9) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces,
and brings them to the table.

(10) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
And most important of all:

(11) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.

(12) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed 'her night off' and, upon
seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some
women!
--
Bigbazza (Barry) Oz

"Happiness is never an accident. It is the prize we get when we choose
wisely from life's great stores"

"Bigbazza" > wrote in message
...
> BBQ RULES
>
> You are about to enter the BBQ season, you good folks in the Northern
> parts of God's earth, Therefore it is important to refresh your memory
> on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity.
>
> When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put
> into motion:
>
> The Routine...
>
> (1) The woman buys the food.
>
> (2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
>
> (3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along
> with
> the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is
> lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
>
> (4) The woman remains outside the compulsory three meter exclusion zone
> where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding activities
> can
> take place without the interference of the woman.
>
> Here comes the important part:
>
> (5) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
>
> More routine...
>
> (6) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
>
> (7) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking great. He
> thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he flips the
> meat.
>
> Important again:
>
> (8) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
> More routine...
>
> (9) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins,
> sauces,
> and brings them to the table.
>
> (10) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
> And most important of all:
>
> (11) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
>
> (12) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed 'her night off' and, upon
> seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some
> women!
> --
> Bigbazza (Barry) Oz

Get laid very often?
--
Dimitri

Corned beef

http://kitchenguide.wordpress.com.

Bigbazza wrote:
> BBQ RULES
>
> You are about to enter the BBQ season, you good folks in the Northern
> parts of God's earth, Therefore it is important to refresh your memory
> on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity.

Might be the way it goes in your house and that probably says a lot
about you.

We had ribs tonight... cole slaw and rice pilaf on the side.

We both go shopping together.

I defrosted the ribs and gave them the dry rub treatment.

She made the cole slaw.

I did my semi-annual grill clean-up including grates, burners, etc.
Decided to order new burners and placed the order online. Fired up the
grill and cooked the ribs 1/2 hour on each side.

I transferred the ribs to a baking pan and baked at 325 for another hour.

She heated up some leftover Rice Pilaf.

We both set the table.... I cut the ribs, she served the sides.

After we were done, we both cleared the table, rinsed the dishes and
loaded the dish washer.

I put the cover back on the grill.... and we are both back in the office
for a short while.

And depending on what we are having for dinner, that is pretty much the
way it happens here every night.


I know the original post was meant to be funny, but I get pretty tired
of seeing men portrayed as mindless idiots.... especially when it comes
to doing their share of the cooking/chores around the house.

If my knuckles are ever dragging on the ground it is because I'm tired,
not because I am a Neanderthal. <vbg>

George L

"Bigbazza" > wrote in news:807su2FasiU1
@mid.individual.net:

> BBQ RULES
>

Good one Barry :-)


Here's another.......

Tofu is not meat - it does not enter the sacred space of the BBQ.

Beer is an important BBQ accessory, it keeps the operator cool,
appropriately flavours the meat and in the unlikely event of a localised
fire provides adequate extinguishing capability.

BBQs can never have female names they are male genus and must have macho
hombre names

BBQs are not pink, meat is pink and then you cook it.

The man child must be brought before the BBQ to learn the sacred ways
before he reaches the age of 16 summers.

BBQs must be powered by fire - hot burning coals are OK but fire is the
key distinguishing feature that differentiates a BBQ from an appliance.

Guests must not take the utensils in hand unless the host requests them to
do so. You don't put your hands on his wife so don't touch his tongs.

BBQing in Speedos is not cool.

BBQing with a girly apron is not cool.

BBQing with one of those aprons that has fake boobs is just wrong.

BBQing on your own is unAustralian, if you are going to fire it up you
need to have a mate on hand to take over in case you go down half way
through a rib eye fillet.

--
Peter Lucas
Brisbane
Australia

All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.

Edmund Burke.

In article >,
George Leppla > wrote:

> If my knuckles are ever dragging on the ground it is because I'm tired,
> not because I am a Neanderthal. <vbg>
>
> George L

-sig file material. <g>
--
Peace! Om

"Human nature seems to be to control other people until they put their foot down."
--Steve Rothstein

Web Albums: <http://picasaweb.google.com/OMPOmelet>

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