How to boil an egg?

I am trying again to boil an egg. I once tried to be waiter at IHOP
but George Bush and the CIA kidnapped me in the Florida Keys and
stuck a microchip in my back. THey said I was crazy. I lost my job
working for Nathan Finkelstein and moved to San Francisco. There I got
a job in a kitchen and I showed the chef how good I was at scrubbing
cast iron skillets with an SOS pad. He told me I couldn't boil an egg.
So here I am again. The shell keeps sticking and am trying to figure
out if I put in one half teaspoon baking soda to two teaspoons of
salt. This is an attempt at propaganding the politics of separating
the skin from the shell. I am using one week old eggs and have three
racks of ice to zap the boiled eggs into quick freeze. Any one know
the mathmatical equations to my microchip?