http://pjmedia.com/drhelen/2014/08/1...eat-out-alone/

It's originally from CNBC - but there are comments from Dr. Helen Smith
as well. (She's the author of "Men on Strike: Why Men Are Boycotting
Marriage, Fatherhood, and the American Dream - and Why It Matters.")


CNBC: All by yourself at dinner? You're in good company. As lifestyles
and demographics shift, Americans are emerging as a nation of diners who
eat alone.

About 57 percent of eating and beverage occasions now occur when
people are by themselves, according to a recent report from The NPD
Group, a market research firm. The portion is highest for non-meal
occasions (industry speak for snacking) followed by breakfast, lunch
and then dinner.

Time constraints, active lifestyles and a record percentage of
one-person households are fueling the trend.

Stigma starting to shift

"In the past, there really has been a stigma around eating alone,
and it's started to change over the years," said Aaron Allen, founder
of a restaurant consulting firm, in a phone interview. ...

To make them feel at ease, restaurants are shifting their typical
service for people eating alone. An extreme example launched in
Amsterdam as a pop-up restaurant touted as the first one-person
restaurant in the world. Another in Japan proposed a solution--dining
with a stuffed animal if eating alone proves to be too lonely.

(snip)

Dr. Smith had this to add:

"I was glad to see that the poll at CNBC asking readers if they were
ashamed to eat alone showed the majority saying 'No.' Maybe people don't
need a stuffed giraffe sitting next to them, maybe peace and quiet and
a good book or their own company is enough."

41 comments so far.


Lenona.

Forgot to say - check out the commentstory from Gawain's Ghost first!
There's a fun surprise in it.

I love having time to myself. I like to take myself out to lunch when I
am shopping. I bring a book and enjoy some peace.

Tara

On 8/16/2014 1:32 PM, Tara wrote:
> I love having time to myself. I like to take myself out to lunch when I
> am shopping. I bring a book and enjoy some peace.
>
> Tara
>
Same here, Tara. I'd take a book and have a nice quiet lunch where I
didn't have to fill the void with pointless chatter or shop talk with
co-workers. Time to recharge my batteries. I really don't know why
there is a stigma attached to eating alone. It's not something
shameful, as the topic of the post suggests.

Jill

On 2014-08-16 1:52 PM, jmcquown wrote:
> On 8/16/2014 1:32 PM, Tara wrote:
>> I love having time to myself. I like to take myself out to lunch when I
>> am shopping. I bring a book and enjoy some peace.
>>
>> Tara
>>
> Same here, Tara. I'd take a book and have a nice quiet lunch where I
> didn't have to fill the void with pointless chatter or shop talk with
> co-workers. Time to recharge my batteries. I really don't know why
> there is a stigma attached to eating alone. It's not something
> shameful, as the topic of the post suggests.


I was mobile at work. I never took a lunch because I didn't want it
sitting in a hot car all day, and didn't want to eat in a car. I had an
expense account so I went to restaurants. If any of my co-workers were
in the area we would meet at a restaurant.Otherwise, I would go on my
own. I took a newspaper and read the news or did the crossword.

On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 13:52:28 -0400, jmcquown >
wrote:

> On 8/16/2014 1:32 PM, Tara wrote:
> > I love having time to myself. I like to take myself out to lunch when I
> > am shopping. I bring a book and enjoy some peace.
> >
> > Tara
> >
> Same here, Tara. I'd take a book and have a nice quiet lunch where I
> didn't have to fill the void with pointless chatter or shop talk with
> co-workers. Time to recharge my batteries. I really don't know why
> there is a stigma attached to eating alone. It's not something
> shameful, as the topic of the post suggests.
>
It was an inflammatory title. Pick a different word, like
"comfortable". All you need to do is look around, lots of singletons
at shopping mall food court tables. I've noticed that as formality
and price increase, the number of people I see eating alone declines.



--
Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them.

On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 09:51:57 -0700 (PDT), wrote:

snip
>Lenona.

Never ashamed. But perhaps uncomfortable in a white table cloth
restaurant. It wouldn't bother me in a fast food place or someplace
like Applebees or Red Robin, or Outback Steakhouse.
Janet US

It is one of those things where it seems easier for a single man to eat alone than a single woman,
especially dinner. I don't know any woman who doesn't feel comfortable eating lunch alone.

N.

I don't where Leona drags up these goofy articles she's fond of posting and this is definitely one of those. But no, I've never felt uncomfortable eating alone, 90% of the time when I eat out I'm alone and I'm not uncomfortable in the least and I don't need a book, newspaper, or crossword puzzle to entertain myself either. For me, people watching is more entertaining than a book or puzzle when out and about.

On 8/16/2014 5:48 PM, Sqwertz wrote:
> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 13:52:28 -0400, jmcquown wrote:
>
>> I really don't know why
>> there is a stigma attached to eating alone. It's not something
>> shameful, as the topic of the post suggests.
>
> Women reading books at restaurants labels you as a unsocialble,
> homely spinster. Bonus point if it's a Harliquen Romance. Extra
> bonus point if you bring two of them in case you finish the first one.
>
> -sw
>
If it will make you feel better I'll tell you I much prefer books where
someone gets killed in the first couple of chapters.

Jill

On 8/16/2014 3:48 PM, Sqwertz wrote:
> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 13:52:28 -0400, jmcquown wrote:
>
>> I really don't know why
>> there is a stigma attached to eating alone. It's not something
>> shameful, as the topic of the post suggests.
>
> Women reading books at restaurants labels you as a unsocialble,
> homely spinster. Bonus point if it's a Harliquen Romance. Extra
> bonus point if you bring two of them in case you finish the first one.
>
> -sw
>
What is the root cause of your seemingly incurable misogyny?

On 8/16/2014 3:54 PM, Sqwertz wrote:
> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 11:50:25 -0700, sf wrote:
>
>> It was an inflammatory title. Pick a different word, like
>> "comfortable". All you need to do is look around, lots of singletons
>> at shopping mall food court tables. I've noticed that as formality
>> and price increase, the number of people I see eating alone declines.
>
> The stigma of eating alone had mostly been solved by the cell-phone
> and social networking. Blowing off your friends for lunch provides
> you with that much needed time for Facebook and Twitter.
>
> -sw
>
Says one whose own social skills are less than evident...

On 8/16/2014 5:48 PM, Sqwertz wrote:
> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 13:52:28 -0400, jmcquown wrote:
>
>> I really don't know why
>> there is a stigma attached to eating alone. It's not something
>> shameful, as the topic of the post suggests.
>
> Women reading books at restaurants labels you as a unsocialble,
>
> -sw
>
>
>
Maybe we don't *want* to be sociable, ever think of that? I go out to
eat for the food, generally when I want something I can't be bothered
cooking at home. It doesn't matter if I'm alone or with a friend, it's
just food.

Jill

On 8/16/2014 6:33 PM, Sqwertz wrote:
> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 17:55:49 -0400, jmcquown wrote:
>
>> On 8/16/2014 5:48 PM, Sqwertz wrote:
>>> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 13:52:28 -0400, jmcquown wrote:
>>>
>>>> I really don't know why
>>>> there is a stigma attached to eating alone. It's not something
>>>> shameful, as the topic of the post suggests.
>>>
>>> Women reading books at restaurants labels you as a unsocialble,
>>> homely spinster. Bonus point if it's a Harliquen Romance. Extra
>>> bonus point if you bring two of them in case you finish the first one.
>>>
>> If it will make you feel better I'll tell you I much prefer books where
>> someone gets killed in the first couple of chapters.
>
> How mundane. The death/murder usually isn't justified.

When is it ever? Beats the hell out of reading what I call "bodice
rippers". You know the type, where the big manly guy grabs a woman and
clenches her firmly against his firm rippled chest, against her will,
making her swoon and finally give in to pleasure as his kisses leave her
breathless...

I could write that sappy crap if I wanted to. I sure as hell don't want
to read it.

> Not that I have ever read any books like this, if they even exist, but
> I like rooting for a victim - somebody ho really needing killing :-)
>
Oh, those books are out there, you just haven't found them.

Jill

On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 18:53:47 -0400, jmcquown >
wrote:

> On 8/16/2014 6:33 PM, Sqwertz wrote:
> > On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 17:55:49 -0400, jmcquown wrote:
> >
> >>>
> >> If it will make you feel better I'll tell you I much prefer books where
> >> someone gets killed in the first couple of chapters.
> >
> > How mundane. The death/murder usually isn't justified.
>
> When is it ever?

It wouldn't be a murder mystery if no one was dead.
>
> > Not that I have ever read any books like this, if they even exist, but
> > I like rooting for a victim - somebody ho really needing killing :-)
> >
> Oh, those books are out there, you just haven't found them.
>

There was a Showtime series called Dexter, which is about a police
forensics expert who moonlights as a serial killer of criminals that
he believes escaped justice. It was based on a series of books that
are still coming out. http://dexter.wikia.com/wiki/Dexter_Book_Series


--
Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them.

On 2014-08-16 6:40 PM, jmcquown wrote:

> Yeah, we used to have to "cover" for someone who never left a tip. She
> ran the server ragged. She complained about every little thing. They
> did their best to comply, with a smile. Then she didn't tip them or
> maybe left a dime for a $10 meal. It was embarrassing. I'd rather dine
> alone than go out to eat with someone who whines all the time and then
> thinks they're being magnanimous by putting a dime on the table.
>

I have been embarrassed by people. Cheap Bob would keep a waitress
hopping and asking all sorts of stupid questions. My neighbour used to
work with Cheap Bob and told me that he once freaked out at a waitress
because he (neighbour) got his food before Cheap Bob's.

Then there is the Big Niece who thought that the waiter assigned to look
after the family at father in law's birthday/Christmas party at one of
his clubs. When the waiter came with coffee she asked for tea. When he
brought the tea she asked for milk for it. When he came with the small
pitcher of milk she asked for a glass of milk. When he brought the milk
she asked for juice. He disappeared. We lost out waiter. I would have
liked more coffee but I could not blame him.

On 8/16/2014 4:48 PM, Sqwertz wrote:
> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 13:52:28 -0400, jmcquown wrote:
>
>> I really don't know why
>> there is a stigma attached to eating alone. It's not something
>> shameful, as the topic of the post suggests.
>
> Women reading books at restaurants labels you as a unsocialble,
> homely spinster. Bonus point if it's a Harliquen Romance. Extra
> bonus point if you bring two of them in case you finish the first one.
>
> -sw
>
>
>
That would be good. I don't want anyone hitting on me at dinner

--
From somewhere very deep in the heart of Texas

On 8/16/2014 4:55 PM, jmcquown wrote:
> On 8/16/2014 5:48 PM, Sqwertz wrote:
>> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 13:52:28 -0400, jmcquown wrote:
>>
>>> I really don't know why
>>> there is a stigma attached to eating alone. It's not something
>>> shameful, as the topic of the post suggests.
>>
>> Women reading books at restaurants labels you as a unsocialble,
>> homely spinster. Bonus point if it's a Harliquen Romance. Extra
>> bonus point if you bring two of them in case you finish the first one.
>>
>> -sw
>>
> If it will make you feel better I'll tell you I much prefer books where
> someone gets killed in the first couple of chapters.
>
> Jill

I usually have my Nook with me

--
From somewhere very deep in the heart of Texas

On 8/16/2014 2:01 PM, Dave Smith wrote:

>
> I was mobile at work. I never took a lunch because I didn't want it
> sitting in a hot car all day, and didn't want to eat in a car. I had an
> expense account so I went to restaurants. If any of my co-workers were
> in the area we would meet at a restaurant.Otherwise, I would go on my
> own. I took a newspaper and read the news or did the crossword.
>

I spent a couple of years in sales and did the same. This was before
cellphones and computers. I'd read, hand write letters. There were
quite a few loners. Once or twice a month I'd be away at night so
dinner would be the same.

I usually enjoyed my meal and never felt ashamed, odd, or anything else
negative.

On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 16:48:56 -0500, Sqwertz wrote:

> Women reading books at restaurants labels you as a unsocialble, homely
> spinster.

One out of three ain't bad.

Tara

> wrote in message
...
> http://pjmedia.com/drhelen/2014/08/1...eat-out-alone/
>
> It's originally from CNBC - but there are comments from Dr. Helen Smith
> as well. (She's the author of "Men on Strike: Why Men Are Boycotting
> Marriage, Fatherhood, and the American Dream - and Why It Matters.")
>
>
> CNBC: All by yourself at dinner? You're in good company. As lifestyles
> and demographics shift, Americans are emerging as a nation of diners who
> eat alone.
>
> About 57 percent of eating and beverage occasions now occur when
> people are by themselves, according to a recent report from The NPD
> Group, a market research firm. The portion is highest for non-meal
> occasions (industry speak for snacking) followed by breakfast, lunch
> and then dinner.
>
> Time constraints, active lifestyles and a record percentage of
> one-person households are fueling the trend.
>
> Stigma starting to shift
>
> "In the past, there really has been a stigma around eating alone,
> and it's started to change over the years," said Aaron Allen, founder
> of a restaurant consulting firm, in a phone interview. ...
>
> To make them feel at ease, restaurants are shifting their typical
> service for people eating alone. An extreme example launched in
> Amsterdam as a pop-up restaurant touted as the first one-person
> restaurant in the world. Another in Japan proposed a solution--dining
> with a stuffed animal if eating alone proves to be too lonely.
>
> (snip)
>
> Dr. Smith had this to add:
>
> "I was glad to see that the poll at CNBC asking readers if they were
> ashamed to eat alone showed the majority saying 'No.' Maybe people don't
> need a stuffed giraffe sitting next to them, maybe peace and quiet and
> a good book or their own company is enough."
>
> 41 comments so far.
>
>
> Lenona.

I find this to be rather bizarre. I can see people being ashamed of their
actions. Assuming that they acted badly. But why would anyone be ashamed
to dine alone? Some probably are though.

I belong to a picky eater's group although many there say that I don't
belong because they think that I eat too many different things to be a picky
eater. But many of these people are filled with shame about their eating.
I don't get that either.

Do I like to dine alone? I'm fine with it at home. I am eating now and
also typing.

A restaurant is different though. In general, I do not like going to
restaurants. And when I do there is almost always a reason for it. Mostly
because someone else wanted to go there. Or we are out somewhere and too
far from home to eat.

I have dined alone at the airport, or at a hotel when I was staying there
alone. I have even done it at work when there was no one taking a lunch
break at the same time as me. I would of course prefer to dine with someone
else because I like to talk. For me, conversation is as much a part of the
dining experience as the food.

"jmcquown" > wrote in message
...
> On 8/16/2014 1:32 PM, Tara wrote:
>> I love having time to myself. I like to take myself out to lunch when I
>> am shopping. I bring a book and enjoy some peace.
>>
>> Tara
>>
> Same here, Tara. I'd take a book and have a nice quiet lunch where I
> didn't have to fill the void with pointless chatter or shop talk with
> co-workers. Time to recharge my batteries. I really don't know why
> there is a stigma attached to eating alone. It's not something shameful,
> as the topic of the post suggests.
>
> Jill

I am just the opposite. If there were people around to talk to, I'd talk to
them and not read the book. Reading is only something I do to fill time.
Or if I have a need to read the specific material. I would never read a
book at a restaurant though. I find that to be rude. I would do it at a
coffee shop though. Lots of people do that.

On 8/16/2014 4:33 PM, Sqwertz wrote:
> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 17:55:49 -0400, jmcquown wrote:
>
>> On 8/16/2014 5:48 PM, Sqwertz wrote:
>>> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 13:52:28 -0400, jmcquown wrote:
>>>
>>>> I really don't know why
>>>> there is a stigma attached to eating alone. It's not something
>>>> shameful, as the topic of the post suggests.
>>>
>>> Women reading books at restaurants labels you as a unsocialble,
>>> homely spinster. Bonus point if it's a Harliquen Romance. Extra
>>> bonus point if you bring two of them in case you finish the first one.
>>>
>> If it will make you feel better I'll tell you I much prefer books where
>> someone gets killed in the first couple of chapters.
>
> How mundane. The death/murder usually isn't justified. I prefer the
> books where the bulk of the story builds up the character of a
> monumental prick (or bitch) and then at the end they die a ironically
> appropriate horrific death.
>
> Not that I have ever read any books like this, if they even exist, but
> I like rooting for a victim - somebody ho really needing killing :-)
>
Did poor dear Omelet need "killing", or was your request that she shoot
you with a rifle a call for help?

"sf" > wrote in message
...
> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 13:52:28 -0400, jmcquown >
> wrote:
>
>> On 8/16/2014 1:32 PM, Tara wrote:
>> > I love having time to myself. I like to take myself out to lunch when
>> > I
>> > am shopping. I bring a book and enjoy some peace.
>> >
>> > Tara
>> >
>> Same here, Tara. I'd take a book and have a nice quiet lunch where I
>> didn't have to fill the void with pointless chatter or shop talk with
>> co-workers. Time to recharge my batteries. I really don't know why
>> there is a stigma attached to eating alone. It's not something
>> shameful, as the topic of the post suggests.
>>
> It was an inflammatory title. Pick a different word, like
> "comfortable". All you need to do is look around, lots of singletons
> at shopping mall food court tables. I've noticed that as formality
> and price increase, the number of people I see eating alone declines.

That's probably true. For me, I have a severe dislike of overpriced food
and I don't like stuffy restaurants so if I am going to one it's because
someone invited me. I would never seek those out on my own. But neither
would I drive to some restaurant to eat. I might get takeout at Taco Time
though if I were out and headed home and needed to eat.

"Sqwertz" > wrote in message
...
> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 17:55:49 -0400, jmcquown wrote:
>
>> On 8/16/2014 5:48 PM, Sqwertz wrote:
>>> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 13:52:28 -0400, jmcquown wrote:
>>>
>>>> I really don't know why
>>>> there is a stigma attached to eating alone. It's not something
>>>> shameful, as the topic of the post suggests.
>>>
>>> Women reading books at restaurants labels you as a unsocialble,
>>> homely spinster. Bonus point if it's a Harliquen Romance. Extra
>>> bonus point if you bring two of them in case you finish the first one.
>>>
>> If it will make you feel better I'll tell you I much prefer books where
>> someone gets killed in the first couple of chapters.
>
> How mundane. The death/murder usually isn't justified. I prefer the
> books where the bulk of the story builds up the character of a
> monumental prick (or bitch) and then at the end they die a ironically
> appropriate horrific death.
>
> Not that I have ever read any books like this, if they even exist, but
> I like rooting for a victim - somebody ho really needing killing :-)

I am reading one now. True story. Fear Of Our Father, written by Lisa
Bonnice and Stacey M.Kanenen. At least that seems like how it's all going
to play out. I just started it.

On 8/16/2014 6:57 PM, Janet Wilder wrote:
> On 8/16/2014 4:48 PM, Sqwertz wrote:
>> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 13:52:28 -0400, jmcquown wrote:
>>
>>> I really don't know why
>>> there is a stigma attached to eating alone. It's not something
>>> shameful, as the topic of the post suggests.
>>
>> Women reading books at restaurants labels you as a unsocialble,
>> homely spinster. Bonus point if it's a Harliquen Romance. Extra
>> bonus point if you bring two of them in case you finish the first one.
>>
>> -sw
>>
>>
>>
> That would be good. I don't want anyone hitting on me at dinner
>
+1

jmcquown > wrote in news:c59k2vFfcs3U1
@mid.individual.net:

> On 8/16/2014 1:32 PM, Tara wrote:
>> I love having time to myself. I like to take myself out to lunch when
I
>> am shopping. I bring a book and enjoy some peace.
>>
>> Tara
>>
> Same here, Tara. I'd take a book and have a nice quiet lunch where I
> didn't have to fill the void with pointless chatter or shop talk with
> co-workers. Time to recharge my batteries. I really don't know why
> there is a stigma attached to eating alone. It's not something
> shameful, as the topic of the post suggests.
>
> Jill

For me, when I was a road warrior, it was never a question about feeling
uncomfortable dining alone. It was more an issue with restaurants
_making_ me feel uncomfortable. The single diner takes up a table that
would generate more revenue if two, three, or four people were seated at
it. So a lot of restaurants try to hustle the single diner through a
meal by bringing out all the courses within a couple of minutes of each
other and stacking plates on the table. Then while you're still working
through the salad that's there at the same time the entree is there and
getting cold, they bring you the bill and slap it down. A couple of
times, I've asked for the manager and gently asked if this is the
restaurant's policy to treat singles that way, and suddenly, the pace
slows to something more enjoyable.

"Alan Holbrook" > wrote in message
. 130...
> jmcquown > wrote in news:c59k2vFfcs3U1
> @mid.individual.net:
>
>> On 8/16/2014 1:32 PM, Tara wrote:
>>> I love having time to myself. I like to take myself out to lunch when
> I
>>> am shopping. I bring a book and enjoy some peace.
>>>
>>> Tara
>>>
>> Same here, Tara. I'd take a book and have a nice quiet lunch where I
>> didn't have to fill the void with pointless chatter or shop talk with
>> co-workers. Time to recharge my batteries. I really don't know why
>> there is a stigma attached to eating alone. It's not something
>> shameful, as the topic of the post suggests.
>>
>> Jill
>
> For me, when I was a road warrior, it was never a question about feeling
> uncomfortable dining alone. It was more an issue with restaurants
> _making_ me feel uncomfortable. The single diner takes up a table that
> would generate more revenue if two, three, or four people were seated at
> it. So a lot of restaurants try to hustle the single diner through a
> meal by bringing out all the courses within a couple of minutes of each
> other and stacking plates on the table. Then while you're still working
> through the salad that's there at the same time the entree is there and
> getting cold, they bring you the bill and slap it down. A couple of
> times, I've asked for the manager and gently asked if this is the
> restaurant's policy to treat singles that way, and suddenly, the pace
> slows to something more enjoyable.

I've had the same thing happen with 2, 3 or more people at the table.
Granted, I am a slow salad eater but usually my food comes before I've eaten
even half of the salad.

Sqwertz wrote:
>
> The death/murder usually isn't justified. I prefer the
> books where the bulk of the story builds up the character of a
> monumental prick (or bitch) and then at the end they die a ironically
> appropriate horrific death.
>
> Not that I have ever read any books like this, if they even exist, but
> I like rooting for a victim - somebody ho really needing killing :-)

If you've ever seen them or not, I'll bet you would like the old
Charles Bronson movies, "Death Wish, (1974) plus later sequels.

"A New York City architect becomes a one-man vigilante squad after
his wife is murdered by street punks in which he randomly goes out
and kills would-be muggerd on the mean streets after dark."

Street justice is illegal but not a bad thing, imo.

G.

> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 16:48:56 -0500, Sqwertz wrote:
>
> > Women reading books at restaurants labels you as a unsocialble, homely
> > spinster.

You've just labelled yourself as one of those no-hoper men so
sexually insecure you'd only hit on an unsociable homely spinster... and
when she turned you down, you kid yourself she must be a menstruating
*******.

Janet UK

On 8/17/2014 12:54 AM, Julie Bove wrote:
>
> "jmcquown" > wrote in message
> ...
>> On 8/16/2014 1:32 PM, Tara wrote:
>>> I love having time to myself. I like to take myself out to lunch when I
>>> am shopping. I bring a book and enjoy some peace.
>>>
>>> Tara
>>>
>> Same here, Tara. I'd take a book and have a nice quiet lunch where I
>> didn't have to fill the void with pointless chatter or shop talk with
>> co-workers. Time to recharge my batteries. I really don't know
>> why there is a stigma attached to eating alone. It's not something
>> shameful, as the topic of the post suggests.
>>
>> Jill
>
> I am just the opposite. If there were people around to talk to, I'd
> talk to them and not read the book. Reading is only something I do to
> fill time. Or if I have a need to read the specific material. I would
> never read a book at a restaurant though. I find that to be rude. I
> would do it at a coffee shop though. Lots of people do that.

Why is my sitting by myself reading a book in a restaurant rude? I
don't ignore the server when they come by to see what I want or ask if
I'd like my coffee refilled. I'd rather read than sit and stare off
into space or try to strike up conversations with strangers at the next
table. I'm there to eat, not to socialize.

Jill

On 8/17/2014 4:01 AM, Alan Holbrook wrote:
> For me, when I was a road warrior, it was never a question about feeling
> uncomfortable dining alone. It was more an issue with restaurants
> _making_ me feel uncomfortable. The single diner takes up a table that
> would generate more revenue if two, three, or four people were seated at
> it. So a lot of restaurants try to hustle the single diner through a
> meal by bringing out all the courses within a couple of minutes of each
> other and stacking plates on the table. Then while you're still working
> through the salad that's there at the same time the entree is there and
> getting cold, they bring you the bill and slap it down. A couple of
> times, I've asked for the manager and gently asked if this is the
> restaurant's policy to treat singles that way, and suddenly, the pace
> slows to something more enjoyable.

I don't think I've encountered that. I did have a hostess try to group
me in with a couple in line ahead of me. She could believe a party of
three people, but not someone dining alone. Seat me at a deuce, not a
four-top. I was on my lunch break, it's not as if I was going to be
sitting there all afternoon depriving them of tons of money.

Jill

In article >,
says...
>
> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 21:54:34 -0700, "Julie Bove"
> > wrote:
>
> >
> >I am just the opposite. If there were people around to talk to, I'd talk to
> >them and not read the book. Reading is only something I do to fill time.
> >Or if I have a need to read the specific material. I would never read a
> >book at a restaurant though. I find that to be rude. I would do it at a
> >coffee shop though. Lots of people do that.
>
> Why ? What's wrong with doing exactly what you want (so long as it
> doesn't infringe on the other diners pleasure) - you say you are a
> writer and yet now you say reading is something you only do to fill
> time?
>
> I don't find it rude to see someone reading in a restaurant and as a
> writer I can't imagine how you do !!! Expect to sell many books ?

LOL. Hoist with her own petard, (more words the "writer" has never
heard of before).

Janet UK.

On 8/17/2014 4:01 AM, Alan Holbrook wrote:

> For me, when I was a road warrior, it was never a question about
> feeling
> uncomfortable dining alone. It was more an issue with restaurants
> _making_ me feel uncomfortable. The single diner takes up a table that
> would generate more revenue if two, three, or four people were seated at
> it. So a lot of restaurants try to hustle the single diner through a
> meal by bringing out all the courses within a couple of minutes of each
> other and stacking plates on the table. Then while you're still working
> through the salad that's there at the same time the entree is there and
> getting cold, they bring you the bill and slap it down.

That's awful.

I prefer to sit at the bar. You can sit there with your drink
for a while and no one thinks anything of it. Order when you're
ready. It's just a whole different feeling from the waiter
script.

Not that I haven't had the occasional bad service from a bartender,
but, for the most part, it's a relaxing meal.

nancy

On 8/16/2014 9:02 PM, Tara wrote:
> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 16:48:56 -0500, Sqwertz wrote:
>
>> Women reading books at restaurants labels you as a unsocialble, homely
>> spinster.
>
> One out of three ain't bad.

Heh. If I was looking to be sociable, I would look around,
not look at a book. Pretty easy to figure out, no one needs
to be insulted or come up with labels. Same if you're on
a plane, it's the universal symbol for I don't want to talk.

nancy

On Saturday, August 16, 2014 6:08:22 PM UTC-5, Dave Smith wrote:
> On 2014-08-16 6:40 PM, jmcquown wrote:
>
>
>
> > Yeah, we used to have to "cover" for someone who never left a tip. She
>
> > ran the server ragged. She complained about every little thing. They
>
> > did their best to comply, with a smile. Then she didn't tip them or
>
> > maybe left a dime for a $10 meal. It was embarrassing. I'd rather dine
>
> > alone than go out to eat with someone who whines all the time and then
>
> > thinks they're being magnanimous by putting a dime on the table.
>
> >
>
>
>
> I have been embarrassed by people. Cheap Bob would keep a waitress
>
> hopping and asking all sorts of stupid questions. My neighbour used to
>
> work with Cheap Bob and told me that he once freaked out at a waitress
>
> because he (neighbour) got his food before Cheap Bob's.
>
>
>
> Then there is the Big Niece who thought that the waiter assigned to look
>
> after the family at father in law's birthday/Christmas party at one of
>
> his clubs. When the waiter came with coffee she asked for tea. When he
>
> brought the tea she asked for milk for it. When he came with the small
>
> pitcher of milk she asked for a glass of milk. When he brought the milk
>
> she asked for juice. He disappeared. We lost out waiter. I would have
>
> liked more coffee but I could not blame him.

Why didn't you tell Big Niece to go to Hell? You could have done the
world a service by crushing her psychologically to the point of suicide.

--Bryan

On 8/17/2014 9:32 AM, Nancy Young wrote:
> On 8/17/2014 4:01 AM, Alan Holbrook wrote:
>
> > For me, when I was a road warrior, it was never a question about
> > feeling
>> uncomfortable dining alone. It was more an issue with restaurants
>> _making_ me feel uncomfortable. The single diner takes up a table that
>> would generate more revenue if two, three, or four people were seated at
>> it. So a lot of restaurants try to hustle the single diner through a
>> meal by bringing out all the courses within a couple of minutes of each
>> other and stacking plates on the table. Then while you're still working
>> through the salad that's there at the same time the entree is there and
>> getting cold, they bring you the bill and slap it down.
>
> That's awful.
>
> I prefer to sit at the bar. You can sit there with your drink
> for a while and no one thinks anything of it. Order when you're
> ready. It's just a whole different feeling from the waiter
> script.
>
I usually sit at the bar when I'm having dinner in the Pub Room at the
Club. I'm not taking up a table other people could occupy. Lots of
people, singles or couples, sit at the bar to eat.

One time I was in there fairly early, around 5:00. Football or
something on the big screen TV. I hadn't brought a book with me. The
bartender, Marena, said, "You don't want to watch that, do you?" Not
really. (Sorry Sis! and other sports fans.) She changed the channel to
'Too Cute!' on Animal Planet.

> Not that I haven't had the occasional bad service from a bartender,
> but, for the most part, it's a relaxing meal.
>
> nancy
>
If they get busy you might sometimes have to wait. Otherwise, I don't
feel rushed. They don't dash over with the guest check the minute the
food arrives.

Jill

On 8/17/2014 9:39 AM, Nancy Young wrote:
> On 8/16/2014 9:02 PM, Tara wrote:
>> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 16:48:56 -0500, Sqwertz wrote:
>>
>>> Women reading books at restaurants labels you as a unsocialble, homely
>>> spinster.
>>
>> One out of three ain't bad.
>
> Heh. If I was looking to be sociable, I would look around,
> not look at a book. Pretty easy to figure out, no one needs
> to be insulted or come up with labels. Same if you're on
> a plane, it's the universal symbol for I don't want to talk.
>
> nancy
>
Oh man, I can't tell you how many times I've been on a plane when
someone seated next to me wanted to talk. Dude, I'm reading a book. I
am not your in-flight companion.

I worked with a guy like that. I'd go outside on break and sit down
with a book. 15 minutes to relax and unwind, you know? He'd sit down
next to me and start talking. Fortunately I'm pretty good at filtering
out extraneous noise.

Jill

On Sun, 17 Aug 2014 14:25:39 +0100, Janet > wrote:

>In article >,
says...
>>
>> On Sat, 16 Aug 2014 21:54:34 -0700, "Julie Bove"
>> > wrote:
>>
>> >
>> >I am just the opposite. If there were people around to talk to, I'd talk to
>> >them and not read the book. Reading is only something I do to fill time.
>> >Or if I have a need to read the specific material. I would never read a
>> >book at a restaurant though. I find that to be rude. I would do it at a
>> >coffee shop though. Lots of people do that.
>>
>> Why ? What's wrong with doing exactly what you want (so long as it
>> doesn't infringe on the other diners pleasure) - you say you are a
>> writer and yet now you say reading is something you only do to fill
>> time?
>>
>> I don't find it rude to see someone reading in a restaurant and as a
>> writer I can't imagine how you do !!! Expect to sell many books ?
>
> LOL. Hoist with her own petard, (more words the "writer" has never
>heard of before).
>
> Janet UK.
When I first saw that word as a kid, I thought it would be a sword or
lance. I was really surprised to find out what it was.
Janet US

Julie Bove wrote:
>
> "jmcquown" > wrote in message
> ...
> > On 8/16/2014 1:32 PM, Tara wrote:
> >> I love having time to myself. I like to take myself out to lunch when I
> >> am shopping. I bring a book and enjoy some peace.
> >>
> >> Tara
> >>
> > Same here, Tara. I'd take a book and have a nice quiet lunch where I
> > didn't have to fill the void with pointless chatter or shop talk with
> > co-workers. Time to recharge my batteries. I really don't know why
> > there is a stigma attached to eating alone. It's not something shameful,
> > as the topic of the post suggests.
> >
> > Jill
>
> I am just the opposite. If there were people around to talk to, I'd talk to
> them and not read the book. Reading is only something I do to fill time.
> Or if I have a need to read the specific material. I would never read a
> book at a restaurant though. I find that to be rude. I would do it at a
> coffee shop though. Lots of people do that.

As I've said before...eating alone in a restaurant is just odd to me.
I've never done it and I would never do that. It's not being ashamed.
If I eat restaurant food alone, I'll get take out or delivery and eat
it at home. Better to read a book or watch tv in the comfort of your
own home than sitting at a table alone to eat....boring.

G.