Now if you want to do your own brisket, here's the straight dope:

http://www.texasmonthly.com/story/ho...erfect-brisket

THE WOOD
Build your fire using regional hardwoods, such as mesquite in the west,
hickory in the east, and post oak and pecan in Central Texas. €œNever use
conifers, like pine, because they emit a distasteful resin that
permeates the food,€� Mueller says. When the coals glow red, the smoking
can begin.

INDIRECT HEAT
This process, which employs an extension firebox on a smoker, produces
fantastic barbecue but proves fickle even to practiced pitmasters;
variables such as humidity and the size of the brisket can throw off
results. €œRule number one is, open the pit as little as possible,€�
Mueller says. The temperature should always stay the same€”between 250
and 325 degrees€”and heat escapes when you open the lid. Cook for 60 to
90 minutes per pound, until the internal meat temperature is at least
180 degrees. You can also use Muellers feel test: €œIf you can poke your
finger at least an inch deep into it, the brisket should be tender.€�

On Sunday, May 3, 2015 at 4:48:44 PM UTC-5, W. Lohman wrote:
> Now if you want to do your own brisket, here's the straight dope:
>
> http://www.texasmonthly.com/story/ho...erfect-brisket
>
> THE WOOD
> Build your fire using regional hardwoods, such as mesquite in the west,
> hickory in the east, and post oak and pecan in Central Texas.

**** post oak. Hickory and pecan are very similar. Mesquite is a poor
substitute, and Peach, apple or cherry is far better.

> "Never use conifers, like pine, because they emit a distasteful resin that
> permeates the food," Mueller says.

Any ****ing moron knows that.

> When the coals glow red, the smoking can begin.
>
What coals? Oh, that's right, with your love of the petroleum industry you
probably use squirt on charcoal lighter fluid.
>
> INDIRECT HEAT
> This process, which employs an extension firebox on a smoker, produces
> fantastic barbecue but proves fickle even to practiced pitmasters;
> variables such as humidity and the size of the brisket can throw off
> results. "Rule number one is, open the pit as little as possible,"
> Mueller says. The temperature should always stay the same--between 250
> and 325 degrees--and heat escapes when you open the lid. Cook for 60 to
> 90 minutes per pound, until the internal meat temperature is at least
> 180 degrees. You can also use Mueller's feel test: "If you can poke your
> finger at least an inch deep into it, the brisket should be tender."

Gee, how informative.

--Bryan

On 5/3/2015 8:47 PM, Bryan-TGWWW wrote:

>
>> When the coals glow red, the smoking can begin.
>>
> What coals? Oh, that's right, with your love of the petroleum industry you
> probably use squirt on charcoal lighter fluid.
>>

Your lack of barbecue expertise is showing.

The coals from the wood burning down, of course. In NC especially, it
is common to use a burn barrel to make coals to put under the meat.
Cleaner burn than just tossing a log on.

On 5/3/2015 6:47 PM, Bryan-TGWWW wrote:
> On Sunday, May 3, 2015 at 4:48:44 PM UTC-5, W. Lohman wrote:
>> Now if you want to do your own brisket, here's the straight dope:
>>
>> http://www.texasmonthly.com/story/ho...erfect-brisket
>>
>> THE WOOD
>> Build your fire using regional hardwoods, such as mesquite in the west,
>> hickory in the east, and post oak and pecan in Central Texas.
>
> **** post oak. Hickory and pecan are very similar. Mesquite is a poor
> substitute, and Peach, apple or cherry is far better.
>
>> "Never use conifers, like pine, because they emit a distasteful resin that
>> permeates the food," Mueller says.
>
> Any ****ing moron knows that.
>
>> When the coals glow red, the smoking can begin.
>>
> What coals? Oh, that's right, with your love of the petroleum industry you
> probably use squirt on charcoal lighter fluid.
>>
>> INDIRECT HEAT
>> This process, which employs an extension firebox on a smoker, produces
>> fantastic barbecue but proves fickle even to practiced pitmasters;
>> variables such as humidity and the size of the brisket can throw off
>> results. "Rule number one is, open the pit as little as possible,"
>> Mueller says. The temperature should always stay the same--between 250
>> and 325 degrees--and heat escapes when you open the lid. Cook for 60 to
>> 90 minutes per pound, until the internal meat temperature is at least
>> 180 degrees. You can also use Mueller's feel test: "If you can poke your
>> finger at least an inch deep into it, the brisket should be tender."
>
> Gee, how informative.
>
> --Bryan
>


Yeah um, real sorry you had such outrage at a basic primer.

Continue using whatever Ferguson shit-wood trimmings you manage to scavenge.

You asshole.

On 5/3/2015 8:19 PM, Ed Pawlowski wrote:
> On 5/3/2015 8:47 PM, Bryan-TGWWW wrote:
>
>>
>>> When the coals glow red, the smoking can begin.
>>>
>> What coals? Oh, that's right, with your love of the petroleum
>> industry you
>> probably use squirt on charcoal lighter fluid.
>>>
>
> Your lack of barbecue expertise is showing.
>
> The coals from the wood burning down, of course. In NC especially, it
> is common to use a burn barrel to make coals to put under the meat.
> Cleaner burn than just tossing a log on.


He's a nutcase, give up.

On Sunday, May 3, 2015 at 2:48:44 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
> Now if you want to do your own brisket, here's the straight dope:
>
> http://www.texasmonthly.com/story/ho...erfect-brisket
>
> THE WOOD
> Build your fire using regional hardwoods, such as mesquite in the west,
> hickory in the east, and post oak and pecan in Central Texas. "Never use
> conifers, like pine, because they emit a distasteful resin that
> permeates the food," Mueller says. When the coals glow red, the smoking
> can begin.
>
> INDIRECT HEAT
> This process, which employs an extension firebox on a smoker, produces
> fantastic barbecue but proves fickle even to practiced pitmasters;
> variables such as humidity and the size of the brisket can throw off
> results. "Rule number one is, open the pit as little as possible,"
> Mueller says. The temperature should always stay the same--between 250
> and 325 degrees--and heat escapes when you open the lid. Cook for 60 to
> 90 minutes per pound, until the internal meat temperature is at least
> 180 degrees. You can also use Mueller's feel test: "If you can poke your
> finger at least an inch deep into it, the brisket should be tender."

Your copy and paste skills are impressive.

On 5/4/2015 12:00 PM, ..... wrote:
> On Sunday, May 3, 2015 at 2:48:44 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
>> Now if you want to do your own brisket, here's the straight dope:
>>
>> http://www.texasmonthly.com/story/ho...erfect-brisket
>>
>> THE WOOD
>> Build your fire using regional hardwoods, such as mesquite in the west,
>> hickory in the east, and post oak and pecan in Central Texas. "Never use
>> conifers, like pine, because they emit a distasteful resin that
>> permeates the food," Mueller says. When the coals glow red, the smoking
>> can begin.
>>
>> INDIRECT HEAT
>> This process, which employs an extension firebox on a smoker, produces
>> fantastic barbecue but proves fickle even to practiced pitmasters;
>> variables such as humidity and the size of the brisket can throw off
>> results. "Rule number one is, open the pit as little as possible,"
>> Mueller says. The temperature should always stay the same--between 250
>> and 325 degrees--and heat escapes when you open the lid. Cook for 60 to
>> 90 minutes per pound, until the internal meat temperature is at least
>> 180 degrees. You can also use Mueller's feel test: "If you can poke your
>> finger at least an inch deep into it, the brisket should be tender."
>
> Your copy and paste skills are impressive.
>

Your snark and whine capacities are limitless.

On Monday, May 4, 2015 at 11:04:21 AM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
> On 5/4/2015 12:00 PM, ..... wrote:
> > On Sunday, May 3, 2015 at 2:48:44 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
> >> Now if you want to do your own brisket, here's the straight dope:
> >>
> >> http://www.texasmonthly.com/story/ho...erfect-brisket
> >>
> >> THE WOOD
> >> Build your fire using regional hardwoods, such as mesquite in the west,
> >> hickory in the east, and post oak and pecan in Central Texas. "Never use
> >> conifers, like pine, because they emit a distasteful resin that
> >> permeates the food," Mueller says. When the coals glow red, the smoking
> >> can begin.
> >>
> >> INDIRECT HEAT
> >> This process, which employs an extension firebox on a smoker, produces
> >> fantastic barbecue but proves fickle even to practiced pitmasters;
> >> variables such as humidity and the size of the brisket can throw off
> >> results. "Rule number one is, open the pit as little as possible,"
> >> Mueller says. The temperature should always stay the same--between 250
> >> and 325 degrees--and heat escapes when you open the lid. Cook for 60 to
> >> 90 minutes per pound, until the internal meat temperature is at least
> >> 180 degrees. You can also use Mueller's feel test: "If you can poke your
> >> finger at least an inch deep into it, the brisket should be tender."
> >
> > Your copy and paste skills are impressive.
> >
>
> Your snark and whine capacities are limitless.

I'm very happy that made sense to you. Copy and paste away.

On 5/4/2015 1:00 PM, ..... wrote:
> On Monday, May 4, 2015 at 11:04:21 AM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
>> On 5/4/2015 12:00 PM, ..... wrote:
>>> On Sunday, May 3, 2015 at 2:48:44 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
>>>> Now if you want to do your own brisket, here's the straight dope:
>>>>
>>>> http://www.texasmonthly.com/story/ho...erfect-brisket
>>>>
>>>> THE WOOD
>>>> Build your fire using regional hardwoods, such as mesquite in the west,
>>>> hickory in the east, and post oak and pecan in Central Texas. "Never use
>>>> conifers, like pine, because they emit a distasteful resin that
>>>> permeates the food," Mueller says. When the coals glow red, the smoking
>>>> can begin.
>>>>
>>>> INDIRECT HEAT
>>>> This process, which employs an extension firebox on a smoker, produces
>>>> fantastic barbecue but proves fickle even to practiced pitmasters;
>>>> variables such as humidity and the size of the brisket can throw off
>>>> results. "Rule number one is, open the pit as little as possible,"
>>>> Mueller says. The temperature should always stay the same--between 250
>>>> and 325 degrees--and heat escapes when you open the lid. Cook for 60 to
>>>> 90 minutes per pound, until the internal meat temperature is at least
>>>> 180 degrees. You can also use Mueller's feel test: "If you can poke your
>>>> finger at least an inch deep into it, the brisket should be tender."
>>>
>>> Your copy and paste skills are impressive.
>>>
>>
>> Your snark and whine capacities are limitless.
>
> I'm very happy that made sense to you.

I'm very please it baffled you.

> Copy and paste away.

Gladly.

Learn anything?

On Monday, May 4, 2015 at 1:11:34 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
> On 5/4/2015 1:00 PM, ..... wrote:
> > On Monday, May 4, 2015 at 11:04:21 AM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
> >> On 5/4/2015 12:00 PM, ..... wrote:
> >>> On Sunday, May 3, 2015 at 2:48:44 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
> >>>> Now if you want to do your own brisket, here's the straight dope:
> >>>>
> >>>> http://www.texasmonthly.com/story/ho...erfect-brisket
> >>>>
> >>>> THE WOOD
> >>>> Build your fire using regional hardwoods, such as mesquite in the west,
> >>>> hickory in the east, and post oak and pecan in Central Texas. "Never use
> >>>> conifers, like pine, because they emit a distasteful resin that
> >>>> permeates the food," Mueller says. When the coals glow red, the smoking
> >>>> can begin.
> >>>>
> >>>> INDIRECT HEAT
> >>>> This process, which employs an extension firebox on a smoker, produces
> >>>> fantastic barbecue but proves fickle even to practiced pitmasters;
> >>>> variables such as humidity and the size of the brisket can throw off
> >>>> results. "Rule number one is, open the pit as little as possible,"
> >>>> Mueller says. The temperature should always stay the same--between 250
> >>>> and 325 degrees--and heat escapes when you open the lid. Cook for 60 to
> >>>> 90 minutes per pound, until the internal meat temperature is at least
> >>>> 180 degrees. You can also use Mueller's feel test: "If you can poke your
> >>>> finger at least an inch deep into it, the brisket should be tender."
> >>>
> >>> Your copy and paste skills are impressive.
> >>>
> >>
> >> Your snark and whine capacities are limitless.
> >
> > I'm very happy that made sense to you.
>
> I'm very please it baffled you.
>
> > Copy and paste away.
>
> Gladly.
>
> Learn anything?

Not from you. You're a moron.

On 5/4/2015 2:29 PM, ..... wrote:
> On Monday, May 4, 2015 at 1:11:34 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
>> On 5/4/2015 1:00 PM, ..... wrote:
>>> On Monday, May 4, 2015 at 11:04:21 AM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
>>>> On 5/4/2015 12:00 PM, ..... wrote:
>>>>> On Sunday, May 3, 2015 at 2:48:44 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
>>>>>> Now if you want to do your own brisket, here's the straight dope:
>>>>>>
>>>>>> http://www.texasmonthly.com/story/ho...erfect-brisket
>>>>>>
>>>>>> THE WOOD
>>>>>> Build your fire using regional hardwoods, such as mesquite in the west,
>>>>>> hickory in the east, and post oak and pecan in Central Texas. "Never use
>>>>>> conifers, like pine, because they emit a distasteful resin that
>>>>>> permeates the food," Mueller says. When the coals glow red, the smoking
>>>>>> can begin.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> INDIRECT HEAT
>>>>>> This process, which employs an extension firebox on a smoker, produces
>>>>>> fantastic barbecue but proves fickle even to practiced pitmasters;
>>>>>> variables such as humidity and the size of the brisket can throw off
>>>>>> results. "Rule number one is, open the pit as little as possible,"
>>>>>> Mueller says. The temperature should always stay the same--between 250
>>>>>> and 325 degrees--and heat escapes when you open the lid. Cook for 60 to
>>>>>> 90 minutes per pound, until the internal meat temperature is at least
>>>>>> 180 degrees. You can also use Mueller's feel test: "If you can poke your
>>>>>> finger at least an inch deep into it, the brisket should be tender."
>>>>>
>>>>> Your copy and paste skills are impressive.
>>>>>
>>>>
>>>> Your snark and whine capacities are limitless.
>>>
>>> I'm very happy that made sense to you.
>>
>> I'm very please it baffled you.
>>
>>> Copy and paste away.
>>
>> Gladly.
>>
>> Learn anything?
>
> Not from you. You're a moron.
>

Not from 30 years of trying to cook Q either, as you shared.

Fool.

On 5/4/2015 2:55 PM, Sqwertz wrote:
> John seems to use the "limpness test" -
> how far it bends and how readily it breaks when you lift it up a few
> inches.
>
Women been doing that one on your for ages, eh?

On Monday, May 4, 2015 at 1:52:36 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
> On 5/4/2015 2:29 PM, ..... wrote:
> > On Monday, May 4, 2015 at 1:11:34 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
> >> On 5/4/2015 1:00 PM, ..... wrote:
> >>> On Monday, May 4, 2015 at 11:04:21 AM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
> >>>> On 5/4/2015 12:00 PM, ..... wrote:
> >>>>> On Sunday, May 3, 2015 at 2:48:44 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
> >>>>>> Now if you want to do your own brisket, here's the straight dope:
> >>>>>>
> >>>>>> http://www.texasmonthly.com/story/ho...erfect-brisket
> >>>>>>
> >>>>>> THE WOOD
> >>>>>> Build your fire using regional hardwoods, such as mesquite in the west,
> >>>>>> hickory in the east, and post oak and pecan in Central Texas. "Never use
> >>>>>> conifers, like pine, because they emit a distasteful resin that
> >>>>>> permeates the food," Mueller says. When the coals glow red, the smoking
> >>>>>> can begin.
> >>>>>>
> >>>>>> INDIRECT HEAT
> >>>>>> This process, which employs an extension firebox on a smoker, produces
> >>>>>> fantastic barbecue but proves fickle even to practiced pitmasters;
> >>>>>> variables such as humidity and the size of the brisket can throw off
> >>>>>> results. "Rule number one is, open the pit as little as possible,"
> >>>>>> Mueller says. The temperature should always stay the same--between 250
> >>>>>> and 325 degrees--and heat escapes when you open the lid. Cook for 60 to
> >>>>>> 90 minutes per pound, until the internal meat temperature is at least
> >>>>>> 180 degrees. You can also use Mueller's feel test: "If you can poke your
> >>>>>> finger at least an inch deep into it, the brisket should be tender.."
> >>>>>
> >>>>> Your copy and paste skills are impressive.
> >>>>>
> >>>>
> >>>> Your snark and whine capacities are limitless.
> >>>
> >>> I'm very happy that made sense to you.
> >>
> >> I'm very please it baffled you.
> >>
> >>> Copy and paste away.
> >>
> >> Gladly.
> >>
> >> Learn anything?
> >
> > Not from you. You're a moron.
> >
>
> Not from 30 years of trying to cook Q either, as you shared.
>
> Fool.

You really should read your replies before you post. I do not share your psychotic megalomania. I barbecue. I play music, I work in industrial maintenance. I work on machines that cost more than your house. I'm sorry that you've been reduced to being a usenet leghumper

On Monday, May 4, 2015 at 2:07:14 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wr
>
> And you flailing to find a put-down it precious.

You are such a gold mine of stupidity. Someone is certainly flailing here... and it isn't me.

On 5/4/2015 3:21 PM, ..... wrote:
> On Monday, May 4, 2015 at 1:52:36 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
>> On 5/4/2015 2:29 PM, ..... wrote:
>>> On Monday, May 4, 2015 at 1:11:34 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
>>>> On 5/4/2015 1:00 PM, ..... wrote:
>>>>> On Monday, May 4, 2015 at 11:04:21 AM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
>>>>>> On 5/4/2015 12:00 PM, ..... wrote:
>>>>>>> On Sunday, May 3, 2015 at 2:48:44 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
>>>>>>>> Now if you want to do your own brisket, here's the straight dope:
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>> http://www.texasmonthly.com/story/ho...erfect-brisket
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>> THE WOOD
>>>>>>>> Build your fire using regional hardwoods, such as mesquite in the west,
>>>>>>>> hickory in the east, and post oak and pecan in Central Texas. "Never use
>>>>>>>> conifers, like pine, because they emit a distasteful resin that
>>>>>>>> permeates the food," Mueller says. When the coals glow red, the smoking
>>>>>>>> can begin.
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>> INDIRECT HEAT
>>>>>>>> This process, which employs an extension firebox on a smoker, produces
>>>>>>>> fantastic barbecue but proves fickle even to practiced pitmasters;
>>>>>>>> variables such as humidity and the size of the brisket can throw off
>>>>>>>> results. "Rule number one is, open the pit as little as possible,"
>>>>>>>> Mueller says. The temperature should always stay the same--between 250
>>>>>>>> and 325 degrees--and heat escapes when you open the lid. Cook for 60 to
>>>>>>>> 90 minutes per pound, until the internal meat temperature is at least
>>>>>>>> 180 degrees. You can also use Mueller's feel test: "If you can poke your
>>>>>>>> finger at least an inch deep into it, the brisket should be tender."
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Your copy and paste skills are impressive.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Your snark and whine capacities are limitless.
>>>>>
>>>>> I'm very happy that made sense to you.
>>>>
>>>> I'm very please it baffled you.
>>>>
>>>>> Copy and paste away.
>>>>
>>>> Gladly.
>>>>
>>>> Learn anything?
>>>
>>> Not from you. You're a moron.
>>>
>>
>> Not from 30 years of trying to cook Q either, as you shared.
>>
>> Fool.
>
> You really should read your replies before you post.

You really should not reply or post.

> I do not share your psychotic megalomania.

Of course you do - your actions define that here.

> I barbecue.

Me too.

> I play music, I work in industrial maintenance.

Bit of a non sequitur.

> I work on machines that cost more than your house.

Now there an irrecoverable slight!

> I'm sorry that you've been reduced to being a usenet leghumper

I'm sorry you're doing just what you accuse me of.

etc.

On 5/4/2015 3:28 PM, ..... wrote:
> On Monday, May 4, 2015 at 2:07:14 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wr
>>
>> And you flailing to find a put-down it precious.
>
> You are such a gold mine of stupidity.

And you're such a canyon of credulity.

> Someone is certainly flailing here... and it isn't me.

He says...flailing on...

On Monday, May 4, 2015 at 2:39:39 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
> On 5/4/2015 3:28 PM, ..... wrote:
> > On Monday, May 4, 2015 at 2:07:14 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wr
> >>
> >> And you flailing to find a put-down it precious.
> >
> > You are such a gold mine of stupidity.
>
> And you're such a canyon of credulity.
>
> > Someone is certainly flailing here... and it isn't me.
>
> He says...flailing on...

You are pathetic and sadly amusing. But I must go to work, so I will leave you to thrash about in the detritus of your stupidity. Enjoy.

On 5/4/2015 3:59 PM, ..... wrote:
> On Monday, May 4, 2015 at 2:39:39 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wrote:
>> On 5/4/2015 3:28 PM, ..... wrote:
>>> On Monday, May 4, 2015 at 2:07:14 PM UTC-7, W. Lohman wr
>>>>
>>>> And you flailing to find a put-down it precious.
>>>
>>> You are such a gold mine of stupidity.
>>
>> And you're such a canyon of credulity.
>>
>>> Someone is certainly flailing here... and it isn't me.
>>
>> He says...flailing on...
>
> You are pathetic and sadly amusing.

You are predictable and mildly boring.

> But I must go to work, so I will leave you to thrash about in the detritus of your stupidity. Enjoy.

"I left you on the debris
At the Sunday morning market
You were sorting through the odds and ends
You was looking for a bargain"