wrote:
>
> I detest deviled eggs, I think they are an abomination, the very worst
> of all possible ways to serve eggs.

You've just never had a good deviled egg, imo.

> At Upstate NY funerals the church
> ladies put out deviled eggs and cheap bologna on cheap white with
> yallow mustard... and buckets of beer. Not long before the VFW hall
> is cleared out by tear gas farting.

I've never seen a "party with food and booze" as part
(afterwards) of a funeral. You go to the funeral, pay your
respects then go home. What's with all the carnival stuff
afterwards? I don't get it.

I guess it's just another excuse to party, eh?

Here's a funeral joke that I saved because I found it funny:
-----------------------------------------------------------
An elderly man was at home in bed, dying. He smelled the aroma
of his favorite chocolate chip cookies baking. He wanted one last
cookie before he died.

He fell out of bed, crawled to the landing, rolled down the
stairs,
and crawled into the kitchen where his wife was busily baking his
favorite cookies.

With waning strength he crawled to the table and was just barely
able to lift his withered arm to the cookie sheet. As he grasped
a warm, moist, chocolate chip cookie, his favorite kind, his wife
suddenly whacked his hand with a spatula.

"Why...?" he whispered, "why did you do that...?"

"They're for the funeral," she replied.
-------------------------------------------------------------

On 2018-06-18 9:59 AM, wrote:
> On 17 Jun 2018 dsi1 wrote:
>

>> My culture has fried chicken and potato salad. I sure wish it had pecan pies.
>> I can take or leave the deviled eggs.
>
> I detest deviled eggs, I think they are an abomination, the very worst
> of all possible ways to serve eggs.

I don't care much for regular hard cooked eggs, but I kinda like deviled
eggs.


> At Upstate NY funerals the church
> ladies put out deviled eggs and cheap bologna on cheap white with
> yallow mustard... and buckets of beer. Not long before the VFW hall
> is cleared out by tear gas farting.

Around here the church ladies usually make the sandwiches for receptions
held in the church hall. They tend to be pretty good. One of the good
things about going to one of those events is the ham and pickle salad
sandwiches.

My wife used to be in the Anglican Church Women and would be called on
to make sandwiches for those things. I am not a church goer and I
resented having to fund those things. The ACW charges for the sandwiches
and goodies served. It is actually a very modest charge, and they use
the money to buy stuff for the church. What annoyed me is that the women
in the ACW paid for the sandwiches out of their own pockets and the ACW
charged the family but never reimbursed the women for the cost of
ingredients. It is no big deal to spring for a couple dozen sandwiches
once in a while, but every once in a while there would be 2 or 3
funerals in a week and the women on call for that week would have to
cough up a considerable amount of money for the food. They are only a
small group of the congregation, so I thought they were really being
taken advantage of.

"Gary" > wrote in message ...
> wrote:
>>
>> I detest deviled eggs, I think they are an abomination, the very worst
>> of all possible ways to serve eggs.
>
> You've just never had a good deviled egg, imo.
>
>> At Upstate NY funerals the church
>> ladies put out deviled eggs and cheap bologna on cheap white with
>> yallow mustard... and buckets of beer. Not long before the VFW hall
>> is cleared out by tear gas farting.
>
> I've never seen a "party with food and booze" as part
> (afterwards) of a funeral. You go to the funeral, pay your
> respects then go home. What's with all the carnival stuff
> afterwards? I don't get it.

I've never been to a funeral where they didn't have a gathering afterwards
with food and drink. Nothing carnival about it, just a chance for people to
share memories etc. You need to get out more.

Cheri

Cindy Hamilton wrote:
>
> now that his father is gone he won't have any reason to go to his
> remaining brothers' funerals.

I don't do funerals. The whole rituals are odd to me. Some people
probably think I don't care but that's not true. I grieve a
person's death in my own way and I don't care what others may
think. Whenever I grieve anything, I prefer to be totally alone.
I don't have a need to share with others.

My grandmother died years ago. She was creamated then put in a
closet for 6 months until it was convenient for all the relatives
to have a funeral/family reunion. My brother was shocked that I
wasn't going to drive 250 miles for that nonsense. "I thought you
loved Gramma." "Yes I did love Gramma, brother, and I grieved
her death 6 months ago. Now that it's convenient for the rest of
the family, I'm not playing that." She's long gone now....go have
your little family reunion. I'm not going.

Cheri wrote:
>
> I've never been to a funeral where they didn't have a gathering afterwards
> with food and drink. Nothing carnival about it, just a chance for people to
> share memories etc. You need to get out more.

Just me, Cheri. I grieve in my own way and don't want others
around. I certainly don't have any appetite after saying goodbye
to someone close. Each to their own, right?

On Mon, 18 Jun 2018 10:24:40 -0400, Dave Smith
> wrote:

>On 2018-06-18 9:59 AM, wrote:
>> On 17 Jun 2018 dsi1 wrote:
>>
>
>>> My culture has fried chicken and potato salad. I sure wish it had pecan pies.
>>> I can take or leave the deviled eggs.
>>
>> I detest deviled eggs, I think they are an abomination, the very worst
>> of all possible ways to serve eggs.
>
>I don't care much for regular hard cooked eggs, but I kinda like deviled
>eggs.

I don't like deviled eggs because they are far too handled, and
typically slapped together by someone with atrocious food handling
habits, typically prepared way in advance and they could sit at room
temperature for hours. Deviled eggs never look appetizing to me.

If I want that spiced flavor in eggs I prefer to make my own egg
salad.... egg salad sandwiches are wonderful... what does one do with
a deviled egg, toss it in the air and snatch it like a seal snatches
raw fish. Deviled eggs is one food I find disgusting.

However we both like hard cooked eggs, in salads, and sliced in
sandwiches. No one handles them other than the eater. In fact I
cooked a dozen yesterday. They peel easily even when left in their
shell in the fridge, but only when hot from the cooking water and
quickly plunged into ice water. I boil eggs in a french fry basket,
making it easy to plunge into a large bowl of ice water. The basket
also prevents the eggs from bouncing against the pot while cooking and
cracking.

Sometimes I'll hard cook three dozen eggs all at once and peel them
all for pickled eggs. Pickled eggs don't need refrigeration and can
easily keep well for months.... here three dozen pickled eggs barely
last a month before all are consumed. I like to add canned beet juice
to the pickling solution, gives me an excuse to pig out on pickled
beets. Sliced pickled eggs are a treat in sardine sandwiches. When I
make pickled eggs I add a stainless steel mesh tea ball filled with
pickling spices to the jar. I also really love Harvard beets. Canned
beets are another item I buy by the case; sliced for pickled beets and
diced for Harvard beets. I keep some cans of beets in the basement
fridge. Sometimes I get the uge for pickled beets, I open a cold can,
sip out some juice to make room, and add s n'p, a tsp of sugar and a
glug of white vinegar, voila, instant pickled beets.

"Gary" > wrote in message ...
> Cindy Hamilton wrote:
>>
>> now that his father is gone he won't have any reason to go to his
>> remaining brothers' funerals.
>
> I don't do funerals. The whole rituals are odd to me. Some people
> probably think I don't care but that's not true. I grieve a
> person's death in my own way and I don't care what others may
> think. Whenever I grieve anything, I prefer to be totally alone.
> I don't have a need to share with others.
>
> My grandmother died years ago. She was creamated then put in a
> closet for 6 months until it was convenient for all the relatives
> to have a funeral/family reunion. My brother was shocked that I
> wasn't going to drive 250 miles for that nonsense. "I thought you
> loved Gramma." "Yes I did love Gramma, brother, and I grieved
> her death 6 months ago. Now that it's convenient for the rest of
> the family, I'm not playing that." She's long gone now....go have
> your little family reunion. I'm not going.


No reason for you to denigrate what they did though. Different strokes Gary.

Cheri

"Gary" > wrote in message ...
> Cheri wrote:
>>
>> I've never been to a funeral where they didn't have a gathering
>> afterwards
>> with food and drink. Nothing carnival about it, just a chance for people
>> to
>> share memories etc. You need to get out more.
>
> Just me, Cheri. I grieve in my own way and don't want others
> around. I certainly don't have any appetite after saying goodbye
> to someone close. Each to their own, right?


Absolutely, I just said that to you in another post. Great minds.

Cheri

On Monday, June 18, 2018 at 3:59:24 AM UTC-10, Sheldon wrote:
>
> I detest deviled eggs, I think they are an abomination, the very worst
> of all possible ways to serve eggs. At Upstate NY funerals the church
> ladies put out deviled eggs and cheap bologna on cheap white with
> yallow mustard... and buckets of beer. Not long before the VFW hall
> is cleared out by tear gas farting.

Actually, I wouldn't know if I can take or leave deviled eggs since I've never seen it served at a funeral or a party. It seems like quite a goofy thing to do to an egg.

On 6/18/2018 10:58 AM, Gary wrote:
> Cindy Hamilton wrote:
>>
>> now that his father is gone he won't have any reason to go to his
>> remaining brothers' funerals.
>
> I don't do funerals.

I went to high school with a girlfriend who was killed in a car accident
a few months after graduation. She was driving home from work one night
and was hit head on by a drunk driver. My mother thought I should
attend the funeral.

I was 17 years old. It was so... disturbing. We were told it was
closed casket because (along with a lot of other organs) they'd donated
her *eyes* to science. I don't think anyone (much less teenagers)
really need to know these details.

I don't really understand why anyone should be asked to view dead
people, either. If you're going to have a casket at least have the
courtesy of closing the lid. Really don't want to see that.

The friend who died had a younger sister (Ginger was 18, Connie was 15).
I went to school with and knew both of them. Connie hugged me as I
entered the chapel and there was an overwhelming scent of gardenia
perfume. Influence of a grandmother, no doubt. She'd been crying. I
had NO idea what to say. I'm sorry. I really was, but I was extremely
uncomfortable. I do not know what to say to someone in these
situations. It's not that I'm unsympathetic. It's just, I was 17 years
old. Sorry for your loss is about it.

I did make a vow to myself after that funeral. I will never attend
another funeral except those of my mother and father. I still hold to
that today. I don't do funerals.

Jill

The whole rituals are odd to me. Some people
> probably think I don't care but that's not true. I grieve a
> person's death in my own way and I don't care what others may
> think. Whenever I grieve anything, I prefer to be totally alone.
> I don't have a need to share with others.
>
> My grandmother died years ago. She was creamated then put in a
> closet for 6 months until it was convenient for all the relatives
> to have a funeral/family reunion. My brother was shocked that I
> wasn't going to drive 250 miles for that nonsense. "I thought you
> loved Gramma." "Yes I did love Gramma, brother, and I grieved
> her death 6 months ago. Now that it's convenient for the rest of
> the family, I'm not playing that." She's long gone now....go have
> your little family reunion. I'm not going.
>

On 6/18/2018 10:41 AM, Cheri wrote:
> "Gary" > wrote in message
> ...
>> wrote:
>>>
>>> I detest deviled eggs, I think they are an abomination, the very worst
>>> of all possible ways to serve eggs.
>>
>> You've just never had a good deviled egg, imo.
>>
>>> At Upstate NY funerals the church
>>> ladies put out deviled eggs and cheap bologna on cheap white with
>>> yallow mustard... and buckets of beer.* Not long before the VFW hall
>>> is cleared out by tear gas farting.
>>
>> I've never seen a "party with food and booze" as part
>> (afterwards) of a funeral. You go to the funeral, pay your
>> respects then go home.* What's with all the carnival stuff
>> afterwards? I don't get it.
>
> I've never been to a funeral where they didn't have a gathering
> afterwards with food and drink. Nothing carnival about it, just a chance
> for people to share memories etc. You need to get out more.
>
> Cheri

I've never attended a funeral like that. I tend to avoid funerals.

And no, I don't like deviled eggs. LOL

Jill

On 6/18/2018 12:56 PM, jmcquown wrote:

>
> I don't really understand why anyone should be asked to view dead
> people, either.Â* If you're going to have a casket at least have the
> courtesy of closing the lid.Â* Really don't want to see that.
>
> The friend who died had a younger sister (Ginger was 18, Connie was 15).
> Â*I went to school with and knew both of them.Â* Connie hugged me as I
> entered the chapel and there was an overwhelming scent of gardenia
> perfume.Â* Influence of a grandmother, no doubt.Â* She'd been crying.Â* I
> had NO idea what to say.Â* I'm sorry.Â* I really was, but I was extremely
> uncomfortable.Â* I do not know what to say to someone in these
> situations.Â* It's not that I'm unsympathetic.Â* It's just, I was 17 years
> old.Â* Sorry for your loss is about it.

My first funerals were at a much younger age. By the time I was 15 I
was a pallbearer too. While I consider it to be an honoer to be asked,
there are better ways.

We do, as a society, have some strange rituals. Not only do we view the
body of loved ones, often it is a person we never saw before, a
grandparent of a close friend, etc. You are really giving support to
that person by being there.

I've said it before, no funerals for us. Cremation and gone, simple and
quick. Spend time with that person now when they can appreciate your
company.

On 2018-06-18 12:56 PM, jmcquown wrote:
> On 6/18/2018 10:58 AM, Gary wrote:

>> I don't do funerals.
>
> I went to high school with a girlfriend who was killed in a car accident
> a few months after graduation.Â* She was driving home from work one night
> and was hit head on by a drunk driver.Â* My mother thought I should
> attend the funeral.

Attending two of my best friends funerals withing 6 months at the age of
15 pretty much turned me off church funerals. I don't do them unless the
person is very close.

>
> I was 17 years old.Â* It was so... disturbing.Â* We were told it was
> closed casket because (along with a lot of other organs) they'd donated
> her *eyes* to science.Â* I don't think anyone (much less teenagers)
> really need to know these details.
>
> I don't really understand why anyone should be asked to view dead
> people, either.Â* If you're going to have a casket at least have the
> courtesy of closing the lid.Â* Really don't want to see that.

Some people seem to need to view the corpse for closure whatever the
heck that is supposed to be. I have done a number of visitations and
avoided viewing the corpse, but there have been some where the reception
line was beside the casket and there was no way to avoid it. Creepy.

On Mon, 18 Jun 2018 12:56:15 -0400, jmcquown >
wrote:

>On 6/18/2018 10:58 AM, Gary wrote:
>> Cindy Hamilton wrote:
>>>
>>> now that his father is gone he won't have any reason to go to his
>>> remaining brothers' funerals.
>>
>> I don't do funerals.
>
>I went to high school with a girlfriend who was killed in a car accident
>a few months after graduation. She was driving home from work one night
>and was hit head on by a drunk driver. My mother thought I should
>attend the funeral.
>
>I was 17 years old. It was so... disturbing. We were told it was
>closed casket because (along with a lot of other organs) they'd donated
>her *eyes* to science. I don't think anyone (much less teenagers)
>really need to know these details.
>
>I don't really understand why anyone should be asked to view dead
>people, either. If you're going to have a casket at least have the
>courtesy of closing the lid. Really don't want to see that.
>
>The friend who died had a younger sister (Ginger was 18, Connie was 15).
> I went to school with and knew both of them. Connie hugged me as I
>entered the chapel and there was an overwhelming scent of gardenia
>perfume. Influence of a grandmother, no doubt. She'd been crying. I
>had NO idea what to say. I'm sorry. I really was, but I was extremely
>uncomfortable. I do not know what to say to someone in these
>situations. It's not that I'm unsympathetic. It's just, I was 17 years
>old. Sorry for your loss is about it.
>
>I did make a vow to myself after that funeral. I will never attend
>another funeral except those of my mother and father. I still hold to
>that today. I don't do funerals.
>
>Jill
>
> The whole rituals are odd to me. Some people
>> probably think I don't care but that's not true. I grieve a
>> person's death in my own way and I don't care what others may
>> think. Whenever I grieve anything, I prefer to be totally alone.
>> I don't have a need to share with others.
>>
>> My grandmother died years ago. She was creamated then put in a
>> closet for 6 months until it was convenient for all the relatives
>> to have a funeral/family reunion. My brother was shocked that I
>> wasn't going to drive 250 miles for that nonsense. "I thought you
>> loved Gramma." "Yes I did love Gramma, brother, and I grieved
>> her death 6 months ago. Now that it's convenient for the rest of
>> the family, I'm not playing that." She's long gone now....go have
>> your little family reunion. I'm not going.
>>

I started going to funerals as a small child because uncles and aunts,
grandmother and grandfather died. I didn't have a problem with the
open casket and the body. But to this day I cannot stand the smell of
a flower shop.
There are just some things you do in life. I personally don't like
visiting dying people in the hospital but I realize that it isn't for
me.
Janet US

On 6/18/2018 1:40 PM, Ed Pawlowski wrote:
> On 6/18/2018 12:56 PM, jmcquown wrote:
>
>>
>> I don't really understand why anyone should be asked to view dead
>> people, either.Â* If you're going to have a casket at least have the
>> courtesy of closing the lid.Â* Really don't want to see that.
>>
>> The friend who died had a younger sister (Ginger was 18, Connie was
>> 15). Â*Â*I went to school with and knew both of them.Â* Connie hugged me
>> as I entered the chapel and there was an overwhelming scent of
>> gardenia perfume.Â* Influence of a grandmother, no doubt.Â* She'd been
>> crying.Â* I had NO idea what to say.Â* I'm sorry.Â* I really was, but I
>> was extremely uncomfortable.Â* I do not know what to say to someone in
>> these situations.Â* It's not that I'm unsympathetic.Â* It's just, I was
>> 17 years old.Â* Sorry for your loss is about it.
>
> My first funerals were at a much younger age.Â* By the time I was 15 I
> was a pallbearer too.Â* While I consider it to be an honoer to be asked,
> there are better ways.
>
> We do, as a society, have some strange rituals.Â* Not only do we view the
> body of loved ones, often it is a person we never saw before, a
> grandparent of a close friend, etc.Â* You are really giving support to
> that person by being there.
>
> I've said it before, no funerals for us.Â* Cremation and gone, simple and
> quick.Â* Spend time with that person now when they can appreciate your
> company.

All I know is that I made up my mind about funerals when I was 17. The
only other funerals I would ever attend was those of my parents. That's
the way it was and always will be. I will not attend any more funerals.
Not even my own.

Jill

On 6/18/2018 1:47 PM, U.S. Janet B. wrote:
> On Mon, 18 Jun 2018 12:56:15 -0400, jmcquown >
> wrote:
>
>> On 6/18/2018 10:58 AM, Gary wrote:
>>> Cindy Hamilton wrote:
>>>>
>>>> now that his father is gone he won't have any reason to go to his
>>>> remaining brothers' funerals.
>>>
>>> I don't do funerals.
>>
>> I went to high school with a girlfriend who was killed in a car accident
>> a few months after graduation. She was driving home from work one night
>> and was hit head on by a drunk driver. My mother thought I should
>> attend the funeral.
>>
>> I was 17 years old. It was so... disturbing. We were told it was
>> closed casket because (along with a lot of other organs) they'd donated
>> her *eyes* to science. I don't think anyone (much less teenagers)
>> really need to know these details.
>>
>> I don't really understand why anyone should be asked to view dead
>> people, either. If you're going to have a casket at least have the
>> courtesy of closing the lid. Really don't want to see that.
>>
>> The friend who died had a younger sister (Ginger was 18, Connie was 15).
>> I went to school with and knew both of them. Connie hugged me as I
>> entered the chapel and there was an overwhelming scent of gardenia
>> perfume. Influence of a grandmother, no doubt. She'd been crying. I
>> had NO idea what to say. I'm sorry. I really was, but I was extremely
>> uncomfortable. I do not know what to say to someone in these
>> situations. It's not that I'm unsympathetic. It's just, I was 17 years
>> old. Sorry for your loss is about it.
>>
>> I did make a vow to myself after that funeral. I will never attend
>> another funeral except those of my mother and father. I still hold to
>> that today. I don't do funerals.
>>
>> Jill
>>
>> The whole rituals are odd to me. Some people
>>> probably think I don't care but that's not true. I grieve a
>>> person's death in my own way and I don't care what others may
>>> think. Whenever I grieve anything, I prefer to be totally alone.
>>> I don't have a need to share with others.
>>>
>>> My grandmother died years ago. She was creamated then put in a
>>> closet for 6 months until it was convenient for all the relatives
>>> to have a funeral/family reunion. My brother was shocked that I
>>> wasn't going to drive 250 miles for that nonsense. "I thought you
>>> loved Gramma." "Yes I did love Gramma, brother, and I grieved
>>> her death 6 months ago. Now that it's convenient for the rest of
>>> the family, I'm not playing that." She's long gone now....go have
>>> your little family reunion. I'm not going.
>>>
>
> I started going to funerals as a small child because uncles and aunts,
> grandmother and grandfather died. I didn't have a problem with the
> open casket and the body. But to this day I cannot stand the smell of
> a flower shop.
> There are just some things you do in life. I personally don't like
> visiting dying people in the hospital but I realize that it isn't for
> me.
> Janet US
>
I'm sure much of the difference is living close enough to attend family
funerals. I rarely saw my grandparents, much less lived near enough to
attend a dead spread when they died.

Jill

On Monday, June 18, 2018 at 8:59:24 AM UTC-5, Sheldon wrote:
>
> On 17 Jun 2018 dsi1 wrote:
>
> >On June 17, 2018 itsjoan wrote:
> >>
> >> Your culture said hard liquor and cake. My culture says fried chicken,
> >> potato salad, deviled eggs, and pecan pies.
> >
> >My culture has fried chicken and potato salad. I sure wish it had pecan pies.
> >I can take or leave the deviled eggs.
>
> I detest deviled eggs, I think they are an abomination, the very worst
> of all possible ways to serve eggs. At Upstate NY funerals the church
> ladies put out deviled eggs and cheap bologna on cheap white with
> yallow mustard... and buckets of beer. Not long before the VFW hall
> is cleared out by tear gas farting.
>
>
I don't think anyone is holding a gun to your head forcing you to
consume deviled eggs. You don't like them? Pass them by and have
a helping of macaroni salad or ham or slaw or macaroni and cheese
or pie or cake. The menu is quite varied and usually something to
please everybody.

But no bologna or buckets of beer or hard liquor.

"jmcquown" > wrote in message
...
> On 6/18/2018 10:41 AM, Cheri wrote:
>> "Gary" > wrote in message
>> ...
>>> wrote:
>>>>
>>>> I detest deviled eggs, I think they are an abomination, the very worst
>>>> of all possible ways to serve eggs.
>>>
>>> You've just never had a good deviled egg, imo.
>>>
>>>> At Upstate NY funerals the church
>>>> ladies put out deviled eggs and cheap bologna on cheap white with
>>>> yallow mustard... and buckets of beer. Not long before the VFW hall
>>>> is cleared out by tear gas farting.
>>>
>>> I've never seen a "party with food and booze" as part
>>> (afterwards) of a funeral. You go to the funeral, pay your
>>> respects then go home. What's with all the carnival stuff
>>> afterwards? I don't get it.
>>
>> I've never been to a funeral where they didn't have a gathering
>> afterwards with food and drink. Nothing carnival about it, just a chance
>> for people to share memories etc. You need to get out more.
>>
>> Cheri
>
> I've never attended a funeral like that. I tend to avoid funerals.
>
> And no, I don't like deviled eggs. LOL
>
> Jill


Fortunately in these later years everyone I knew and loved chose to be
cremated, I don't do open caskets or body viewing. As my dear friend said
when people got on her for not having a body viewing before cremation of her
husband..."You should have viewed the body while it was alive." I always
loved that.

Cheri

> wrote in message news:322b4225-a176-403f-b1c2-

> I don't think anyone is holding a gun to your head forcing you to
> consume deviled eggs. You don't like them? Pass them by and have
> a helping of macaroni salad or ham or slaw or macaroni and cheese
> or pie or cake. The menu is quite varied and usually something to
> please everybody.
>
> But no bologna or buckets of beer or hard liquor.


The last one I was at had beer and wine, no hard liquor.

Cheri

On 2018-06-18 2:04 PM, jmcquown wrote:
> On 6/18/2018 1:40 PM, Ed Pawlowski wrote:

> All I know is that I made up my mind about funerals when I was 17.Â* The
> only other funerals I would ever attend was those of my parents.Â* That's
> the way it was and always will be.Â* I will not attend any more funerals.
> Â*Not even my own.

Well, if you aren't going to your own funeral, either am I.

On 2018-06-18 2:07 PM, jmcquown wrote:
> On 6/18/2018 1:47 PM, U.S. Janet B. wrote:

> I'm sure much of the difference is living close enough to attend family
> funerals.Â* I rarely saw my grandparents, much less lived near enough to
> attend a dead spread when they died.


Last fall I flew out to Victoria BC and by ferry to Saltspring Island
for a celebration of life for guy who had been one of my best friend
since we were 10 years. It was the right thing to do.

On Monday, June 18, 2018 at 12:47:30 PM UTC-5, U.S. Janet B. wrote:
>
> I started going to funerals as a small child because uncles and aunts,
> grandmother and grandfather died. I didn't have a problem with the
> open casket and the body.
>
Same here. I guess my parents took me to funerals as a very small child
so I was accustomed to it and it didn't bother me.
>
> But to this day I cannot stand the smell of
> a flower shop.
>
One of my brothers worked as a delivery boy for a neighborhood florist
MANY years ago. He was allowed to bring home flowers that were perfectly
fine but would have wilted within a day or two if they had been placed in
an arrangement to be sold. One of the many flowers he was able to bring
home were carnations. My mother finally told him to not bring anymore
flowers home although they were lovely. He was a bit hurt as his gesture
was being refused. She told him the house was beginning to smell like a
funeral home.
>
> There are just some things you do in life. I personally don't like
> visiting dying people in the hospital but I realize that it isn't for
> me.
> Janet US
>
True. I feel the same way.

On 2018-06-18 2:08 PM, wrote:
> On Monday, June 18, 2018 at 8:59:24 AM UTC-5, Sheldon wrote:
>>
>
> I don't think anyone is holding a gun to your head forcing you to
> consume deviled eggs. You don't like them? Pass them by and have
> a helping of macaroni salad or ham or slaw or macaroni and cheese
> or pie or cake. The menu is quite varied and usually something to
> please everybody.
>

I have been to a number of functions where deviled eggs have been
served. They usually go quickly.

On Monday, June 18, 2018 at 1:19:43 PM UTC-5, Dave Smith wrote:
>
> I have been to a number of functions where deviled eggs have been
> served. They usually go quickly.
>
>
Yes, they do and I LOVE deviled eggs. I'll happily consume those that
Sheldon turns his nose up at.

On 2018-06-18 2:10 PM, Cheri wrote:
> "jmcquown" > wrote in message
>
> Fortunately in these later years everyone I knew and loved chose to be
> cremated, I don't do open caskets or body viewing. As my dear friend
> said when people got on her for not having a body viewing before
> cremation of her husband..."You should have viewed the body while it was
> alive." I always loved that.
>

We heard the strangest thing a couple weeks ago. The father of a friend
from the dog park died. She had been responsible for his upkeep for some
time, but only because she was his daughter. Apparently the old man had
been physically and verbally abuse toward her most of her life, so she
had no real feelings for the guy. Never the less, she accepted the
familial obligation.

There was a brother in the picture. She had not seen the guy for about
20 years, and he had been estranged from the father for longer than
that. The guy has a substance abuse problem, so someone had to pick him
up and drive him to the funeral home to see the body. He was too drunk
mid morning to go, so the nephew had to make another trip out to get
him. When the derelict brother finally got to the funeral home he was
upset about plans for cremation. Well, too bad for him. The father had
wanted to be cremated and had prepaid everything so the plans could not
be changed to accommodate the son who had not seen his father for decades.

On 6/18/2018 2:14 PM, Dave Smith wrote:
> On 2018-06-18 2:04 PM, jmcquown wrote:
>> On 6/18/2018 1:40 PM, Ed Pawlowski wrote:
>
>> All I know is that I made up my mind about funerals when I was 17.
>> The only other funerals I would ever attend was those of my parents.
>> That's the way it was and always will be.Â* I will not attend any more
>> funerals. Â*Â*Not even my own.
>
> Well, if you aren't going to your own funeral, either am I.

LOL. I'm certainly not inviting people into my house after I'm dead for
food. Didn't do it while I was living, no reason to do it when I'm dead.

Jill

In article >, says...
>
> "Gary" > wrote in message ...
> > wrote:
> >>
> >> I detest deviled eggs, I think they are an abomination, the very worst
> >> of all possible ways to serve eggs.
> >
> > You've just never had a good deviled egg, imo.
> >
> >> At Upstate NY funerals the church
> >> ladies put out deviled eggs and cheap bologna on cheap white with
> >> yallow mustard... and buckets of beer. Not long before the VFW hall
> >> is cleared out by tear gas farting.
> >
> > I've never seen a "party with food and booze" as part
> > (afterwards) of a funeral. You go to the funeral, pay your
> > respects then go home. What's with all the carnival stuff
> > afterwards? I don't get it.
>
> I've never been to a funeral where they didn't have a gathering afterwards
> with food and drink.

Me neither.

At funerals here, hospitality is offered because attendees might have
come hundreds of miles for the service (or flown in from another
country). They may not have seen relatives and old friends for decades,
and it's comforting for the bereaved to share happy memories of the
deceased. In my family the post-funeral gathering is open house at home
and the food is always home made, but many people arrange one to be held
and catered in a hired private room at a hotel or pub.

Janet UK

Nothing carnival about it, just a chance for people to
> share memories etc. You need to get out more.
>
> Cheri

On Mon, 18 Jun 2018 14:31:54 -0400, jmcquown >
wrote:

>On 6/18/2018 2:14 PM, Dave Smith wrote:
>> On 2018-06-18 2:04 PM, jmcquown wrote:
>>> On 6/18/2018 1:40 PM, Ed Pawlowski wrote:
>>
>>> All I know is that I made up my mind about funerals when I was 17.
>>> The only other funerals I would ever attend was those of my parents.
>>> That's the way it was and always will be.* I will not attend any more
>>> funerals. **Not even my own.
>>
>> Well, if you aren't going to your own funeral, either am I.
>
>LOL. I'm certainly not inviting people into my house after I'm dead for
>food. Didn't do it while I was living, no reason to do it when I'm dead.

You're such a party animal!

On Mon, 18 Jun 2018 13:23:14 -0400, jmcquown >
wrote:

>On 6/18/2018 10:41 AM, Cheri wrote:
>> "Gary" > wrote in message
>> ...
>>> wrote:
>>>>
>>>> I detest deviled eggs, I think they are an abomination, the very worst
>>>> of all possible ways to serve eggs.
>>>
>>> You've just never had a good deviled egg, imo.
>>>
>>>> At Upstate NY funerals the church
>>>> ladies put out deviled eggs and cheap bologna on cheap white with
>>>> yallow mustard... and buckets of beer.* Not long before the VFW hall
>>>> is cleared out by tear gas farting.
>>>
>>> I've never seen a "party with food and booze" as part
>>> (afterwards) of a funeral. You go to the funeral, pay your
>>> respects then go home.* What's with all the carnival stuff
>>> afterwards? I don't get it.
>>
>> I've never been to a funeral where they didn't have a gathering
>> afterwards with food and drink. Nothing carnival about it, just a chance
>> for people to share memories etc. You need to get out more.
>>
>> Cheri
>
>I've never attended a funeral like that. I tend to avoid funerals.
>
>And no, I don't like deviled eggs. LOL
>
>Jill

I did attend one for my elderly bridge partner, he had been RCN,
joined the navy for the war two years too young, but his father signed
to say he was old enough. The reward was he was on pension two years
earlier because there had never been any way to alter his age. He was
a real rogue type and I went to his celebration of life, even the RC
priest was in a light mood and did a dance all over the chancel steps
after the service and said to 'come on over to the hall and eat, drink
and be merry to remember Murph' - Murph would have loved that. He's
still alive as far as I am concerned one of his grandsons was about
6'3", scrawny with a mop of red hair, a double for the old guy.

On 6/18/2018 2:24 PM, wrote:
> On Monday, June 18, 2018 at 1:19:43 PM UTC-5, Dave Smith wrote:
>>
>> I have been to a number of functions where deviled eggs have been
>> served. They usually go quickly.
>>
>>
> Yes, they do and I LOVE deviled eggs. I'll happily consume those that
> Sheldon turns his nose up at.
>

Same here. When we had the annual company picnic my wife always made a
big tray of them. Always gone in under 30 minutes.

"Ed Pawlowski" wrote in message ...

On 6/18/2018 12:56 PM, jmcquown wrote:

>
> I don't really understand why anyone should be asked to view dead people,
> either. If you're going to have a casket at least have the courtesy of
> closing the lid. Really don't want to see that.
>
> The friend who died had a younger sister (Ginger was 18, Connie was 15). I
> went to school with and knew both of them. Connie hugged me as I entered
> the chapel and there was an overwhelming scent of gardenia perfume.
> Influence of a grandmother, no doubt. She'd been crying. I had NO idea
> what to say. I'm sorry. I really was, but I was extremely uncomfortable.
> I do not know what to say to someone in these situations. It's not that
> I'm unsympathetic. It's just, I was 17 years old. Sorry for your loss is
> about it.

My first funerals were at a much younger age. By the time I was 15 I
was a pallbearer too. While I consider it to be an honoer to be asked,
there are better ways.

We do, as a society, have some strange rituals. Not only do we view the
body of loved ones, often it is a person we never saw before, a
grandparent of a close friend, etc. You are really giving support to
that person by being there.

I've said it before, no funerals for us. Cremation and gone, simple and
quick. Spend time with that person now when they can appreciate your
company.

===

When I was about 5 yo, my aunt died and I was taken in to see her. In those
days, the body was in its coffin in the front room, surrounded by flowers
and candles.

"U.S. Janet B." wrote in message
...

On Mon, 18 Jun 2018 12:56:15 -0400, jmcquown >
wrote:

>On 6/18/2018 10:58 AM, Gary wrote:
>> Cindy Hamilton wrote:
>>>
>>> now that his father is gone he won't have any reason to go to his
>>> remaining brothers' funerals.
>>
>> I don't do funerals.
>
>I went to high school with a girlfriend who was killed in a car accident
>a few months after graduation. She was driving home from work one night
>and was hit head on by a drunk driver. My mother thought I should
>attend the funeral.
>
>I was 17 years old. It was so... disturbing. We were told it was
>closed casket because (along with a lot of other organs) they'd donated
>her *eyes* to science. I don't think anyone (much less teenagers)
>really need to know these details.
>
>I don't really understand why anyone should be asked to view dead
>people, either. If you're going to have a casket at least have the
>courtesy of closing the lid. Really don't want to see that.
>
>The friend who died had a younger sister (Ginger was 18, Connie was 15).
> I went to school with and knew both of them. Connie hugged me as I
>entered the chapel and there was an overwhelming scent of gardenia
>perfume. Influence of a grandmother, no doubt. She'd been crying. I
>had NO idea what to say. I'm sorry. I really was, but I was extremely
>uncomfortable. I do not know what to say to someone in these
>situations. It's not that I'm unsympathetic. It's just, I was 17 years
>old. Sorry for your loss is about it.
>
>I did make a vow to myself after that funeral. I will never attend
>another funeral except those of my mother and father. I still hold to
>that today. I don't do funerals.
>
>Jill
>
> The whole rituals are odd to me. Some people
>> probably think I don't care but that's not true. I grieve a
>> person's death in my own way and I don't care what others may
>> think. Whenever I grieve anything, I prefer to be totally alone.
>> I don't have a need to share with others.
>>
>> My grandmother died years ago. She was creamated then put in a
>> closet for 6 months until it was convenient for all the relatives
>> to have a funeral/family reunion. My brother was shocked that I
>> wasn't going to drive 250 miles for that nonsense. "I thought you
>> loved Gramma." "Yes I did love Gramma, brother, and I grieved
>> her death 6 months ago. Now that it's convenient for the rest of
>> the family, I'm not playing that." She's long gone now....go have
>> your little family reunion. I'm not going.
>>

I started going to funerals as a small child because uncles and aunts,
grandmother and grandfather died. I didn't have a problem with the
open casket and the body. But to this day I cannot stand the smell of
a flower shop.
There are just some things you do in life. I personally don't like
visiting dying people in the hospital but I realize that it isn't for
me.
Janet US

===

Yes! That smell has always stayed with me. To me that smell is of death!

On Monday, June 18, 2018 at 2:24:43 PM UTC-4, wrote:
> On Monday, June 18, 2018 at 1:19:43 PM UTC-5, Dave Smith wrote:
> >
> > I have been to a number of functions where deviled eggs have been
> > served. They usually go quickly.
> >
> >
> Yes, they do and I LOVE deviled eggs. I'll happily consume those that
> Sheldon turns his nose up at.

I love deviled eggs, but not with sweet pickle relish in them. Because
you generally can't tell from the outside, I mainly eat only the ones I
make. Same thing with egg salad.

Cindy Hamilton

On Mon, 18 Jun 2018 14:07:30 -0400, jmcquown >
wrote:

>On 6/18/2018 1:47 PM, U.S. Janet B. wrote:


snip


>>
>> I started going to funerals as a small child because uncles and aunts,
>> grandmother and grandfather died. I didn't have a problem with the
>> open casket and the body. But to this day I cannot stand the smell of
>> a flower shop.
>> There are just some things you do in life. I personally don't like
>> visiting dying people in the hospital but I realize that it isn't for
>> me.
>> Janet US
>>
>I'm sure much of the difference is living close enough to attend family
>funerals. I rarely saw my grandparents, much less lived near enough to
>attend a dead spread when they died.
>
>Jill

Apparently dead spreads are not a thing where I grew up.

On Monday, June 18, 2018 at 3:00:06 PM UTC-5, Cindy Hamilton wrote:
>
> I love deviled eggs, but not with sweet pickle relish in them. Because
> you generally can't tell from the outside, I mainly eat only the ones I
> make. Same thing with egg salad.
>
> Cindy Hamilton
>
>
I'll take them most any way.

Just late last week I made a bowl of egg salad. I finished the last
bit yesterday for breakfast smeared on a split open, *lightly*
buttered and lightly toasted English muffin. But no pickle relish of
any kind in the egg salad.

On Monday, June 18, 2018 at 3:07:36 PM UTC-5, U.S. Janet B. wrote:
>
> Apparently dead spreads are not a thing where I grew up.
>
>
You have been deprived.

:-)

On Monday, June 18, 2018 at 4:58:03 AM UTC-10, Gary wrote:
>
> I don't do funerals. The whole rituals are odd to me. Some people
> probably think I don't care but that's not true. I grieve a
> person's death in my own way and I don't care what others may
> think. Whenever I grieve anything, I prefer to be totally alone.
> I don't have a need to share with others.
>
> My grandmother died years ago. She was creamated then put in a
> closet for 6 months until it was convenient for all the relatives
> to have a funeral/family reunion. My brother was shocked that I
> wasn't going to drive 250 miles for that nonsense. "I thought you
> loved Gramma." "Yes I did love Gramma, brother, and I grieved
> her death 6 months ago. Now that it's convenient for the rest of
> the family, I'm not playing that." She's long gone now....go have
> your little family reunion. I'm not going.

Funerals are to show respect for the family and the dead guy. It reaffirms that the deceased was a valued member of the community. OTOH, driving 250 miles to see my dead granny might give me pause. On this tiny rock, anything over 12 miles is kinda far.

On Monday, June 18, 2018 at 9:39:49 AM UTC-10, Ophelia wrote:
>
> When I was about 5 yo, my aunt died and I was taken in to see her. In those
> days, the body was in its coffin in the front room, surrounded by flowers
> and candles.

That sounds like a rather creepy childhood memory. Sorry you had to go through that.

"Dave Smith" > wrote in message
...
> On 2018-06-18 2:10 PM, Cheri wrote:
>> "jmcquown" > wrote in message
>> Fortunately in these later years everyone I knew and loved chose to be
>> cremated, I don't do open caskets or body viewing. As my dear friend said
>> when people got on her for not having a body viewing before cremation of
>> her husband..."You should have viewed the body while it was alive." I
>> always loved that.
>>
>
> We heard the strangest thing a couple weeks ago. The father of a friend
> from the dog park died. She had been responsible for his upkeep for some
> time, but only because she was his daughter. Apparently the old man had
> been physically and verbally abuse toward her most of her life, so she had
> no real feelings for the guy. Never the less, she accepted the familial
> obligation.
>
> There was a brother in the picture. She had not seen the guy for about 20
> years, and he had been estranged from the father for longer than that.
> The guy has a substance abuse problem, so someone had to pick him up and
> drive him to the funeral home to see the body. He was too drunk mid
> morning to go, so the nephew had to make another trip out to get him. When
> the derelict brother finally got to the funeral home he was upset about
> plans for cremation. Well, too bad for him. The father had wanted to be
> cremated and had prepaid everything so the plans could not be changed to
> accommodate the son who had not seen his father for decades.
>


Don't you just love it when these people show up out of nowhere and want to
change everything to suit themselves? Geez, here's a bus ticket back to
where you came from.

Cheri

"jmcquown" > wrote in message
...
> On 6/18/2018 2:14 PM, Dave Smith wrote:
>> On 2018-06-18 2:04 PM, jmcquown wrote:
>>> On 6/18/2018 1:40 PM, Ed Pawlowski wrote:
>>
>>> All I know is that I made up my mind about funerals when I was 17. The
>>> only other funerals I would ever attend was those of my parents. That's
>>> the way it was and always will be. I will not attend any more funerals.
>>> Â Â Not even my own.
>>
>> Well, if you aren't going to your own funeral, either am I.
>
> LOL. I'm certainly not inviting people into my house after I'm dead for
> food. Didn't do it while I was living, no reason to do it when I'm dead.
>
>
> Jill


I have people in, not as much as in earlier years, but only a select few, no
neighbors.

Cheri