"zuuum" > wrote in message
...
> The "properties" of a sauce:
>
> Adds moisture
> adds sheen or gloss
> augments the flavor of the item

covers up cosmetic flaws....:-)

Bob M.

"Bob (this one)" > wrote in message
...
> > But try Pastorio's Half-Assed ******* Sauce. That's a real sauce!
>
> I would characterize it more as "saucelike" or "sauce-istic."

"Possessing certain sauceateric qualities"?

"Almost, but not quite, completely unlike sauce"? (Apologies to
Douglas Adams...)


Bob (this other one) M.

One time on Usenet, x-no-archive: yes said:
> day dreamer@dream .com@ wrote:

> >Well let's see. Pie = "The ratio of the circumference to the diameter
> >of a circle 3.12159265...........on and on.....".

> and never forget - pi are not square, pi are round.

When asked about his favorite type of pie, my father always replies
"round". I really need to make him a square one sometime...

--
Jani in WA (S'mee)
~ mom, VidGamer, novice cook, dieter ~

"Bob (this one)" > wrote in message
...

> Are you trying to quit smoking? You can tell us. Many other have tried
> only to discover that they become enraged and shriek things at puzzled
> strangers. Seriously. You can tell us.

Nope. Ain't enraged, either. Was just trying to calmly
remind one and all of a great truism, best stated, I believe
by no less than one Robert A. Heinlein (see, as I've said before
all us Bobs are just as Fine and Upstanding People As You'd
Ever Care to Meet); to wit:

"Never wrassle with a pig - you just get dirty, and the pig
enjoys it."

Or, as I prefer to look at this bit of sage advice (given enough
thyme, anyway): there comes a point in any discussion where it
should be apparent to all concerned that there's just no point
in continuing on, unless for some reason you possess an irrational
drive to Have the Last Word. The best thing to do, for all
concerned, is simply to acknowledge when that point is reached
(and I think I can safely say that most would consider it long
past, here), and drop it. The are better things to be doing with
one's potential cooking, eating, and drinking time.

>
> We feel your pain.
>

But Doc, it still hurts when I do THIS...


> Here. Try this Merde a la mode. Note the succulence, and effusive yet
> aggressive scent notes.

What, you're still serving THAT crap? :-)


> Yep. But they won't try to claim knowledge they don't have. Nor will
> they hoist themselves by their own petards when offering no-information
> comments while whining about it's having been demonstrated to be
> nonsense. The difference, of course, is that most people don't try to
> flounce around trying to be cute if they have nothing behind it.

Sure - but is there anything to be gained, once it's pointed out
that it IS nonsense, in continuing onward? Do you also make it
a point to stop at the local "psychic's" shack and attempt to
dissuade the proprietor of their particular delusion, or spend long
hours at the local hospital-of-the-padded-walls attempting to
convince people that they're NOT Napoleon III?

By the way, hoisting someone by the petard, at least if done within
your kitchen, is cause for summary failure of a health inspection.
Wear gloves, and clean up carefully afterwards.


> Or not, if it's not consequential to them. But perhaps something more
> stertorous is in order if they're insisting that that spring roll is a
> gooddamit egg roll and no Chinese guy is going to say anything
> different. At that point, the claimer has painted a lovely target on
> himself.

Maybe. So you fire once, and then move on. What purpose
is there in continuing to demonstrate that your aim really IS
sufficiently good so as to hit a target the size of a barn from a
distance of three feet?


> <LOL> Perhaps a tiny bit overstated, no?

If I've told you once, I've told you six billion times, I NEVER
exaggerate...


> I find that derision, mockery, scorn (Sounds like a
> bunch of lawyers.)

Was a vaudeville act, too, if I recollect correctly...


Bob (third in from the right) M.

"Shaun aRe" > wrote in message
eenews.net...

> Look, right, see - forget about all that - tell me, WTF constitutes the
> definition of a... *pie* ?

Anything that would suitable for throwing into one's face in
a Three Stooges movie...:-)

Bob M.

"Bob (this one)" > said:

> Damsel wrote:
>
> > Turns out, Fettucini Alfredo is nothing more than a bowl of hot pasta, some
> > melted butter, and some Parmesan tossed into the whole mess. No cream.
> > Definitely not a sauce. F.A. is what I eat when there's nothing else in
> > the house. I'm *so* disillusioned.
>
> I just love how your eyes sparkle when you're so disillusioned.

No, I'm seriously disillusioned. This thread would have been the
equivalent of me telling Crash that there are no beans or tomatoes in chili
and having him ask if that were true. I thought Alfredo was a sauce until
you told me that the cheese would never melt into the butter. That's all
it took. Now I'm a believer.

Carol

Damsel wrote:
> "Bob (this one)" > said:
>
>
>>Damsel wrote:
>>
>>
>>>Turns out, Fettucini Alfredo is nothing more than a bowl of hot pasta, some
>>>melted butter, and some Parmesan tossed into the whole mess. No cream.
>>>Definitely not a sauce. F.A. is what I eat when there's nothing else in
>>>the house. I'm *so* disillusioned.
>>
>>I just love how your eyes sparkle when you're so disillusioned.
>
>
> No, I'm seriously disillusioned. This thread would have been the
> equivalent of me telling Crash that there are no beans or tomatoes in chili
> and having him ask if that were true. I thought Alfredo was a sauce until
> you told me that the cheese would never melt into the butter. That's all
> it took. Now I'm a believer.
>
> Carol



What would be a good name for a creamy pasta sauce with a *lot* of
Parmesan cheese in it? (serious question) I'll give you that "Alfredo
sauce" is not a very good name because it's confusing.

Best regards,
Bob

zxcvbob > said:

> What would be a good name for a creamy pasta sauce with a *lot* of
> Parmesan cheese in it? (serious question) I'll give you that "Alfredo
> sauce" is not a very good name because it's confusing.

I asked Bob the same question. Go back and look for "Pastorio's Half-Assed
******* Sauce". I posted it as a recipe in a separate thread.

Carol

Damsel wrote:
> zxcvbob > said:
>
>
>>What would be a good name for a creamy pasta sauce with a *lot* of
>>Parmesan cheese in it? (serious question) I'll give you that "Alfredo
>>sauce" is not a very good name because it's confusing.
>
>
> I asked Bob the same question. Go back and look for "Pastorio's Half-Assed
> ******* Sauce". I posted it as a recipe in a separate thread.
>
> Carol


I saw that, but since it has bacon and eggs in it (remember your
"breakfast alfredo" comment?) I wasn't sure it was close enough.

Bob

Damsel > said:

> zxcvbob > said:
>
> > What would be a good name for a creamy pasta sauce with a *lot* of
> > Parmesan cheese in it? (serious question) I'll give you that "Alfredo
> > sauce" is not a very good name because it's confusing.
>
> I asked Bob the same question. Go back and look for "Pastorio's Half-Assed
> ******* Sauce". I posted it as a recipe in a separate thread.

What the heck ... you could call it Almost Sauce Batard if you want to
clean the name up a bit. Here's the recipe:


* Exported from MasterCook *

Pastorio's Half-Assed ******* Sauce

Recipe By :Bob Pastorio
Serving Size : 0 Preparation Time :0:00
Categories : pasta sauces/gravies


Amount Measure Ingredient -- Preparation Method
-------- ------------ --------------------------------
1/2 cup milk
3 tablespoons butter
1 clove garlic
more butter -- if desired
2 tablespoons bacon fat -- if desired
1 large egg
1/4 cup parmesan cheese
flat leaf parsley
fresh ground black pepper

Use some milk. Real milk. Or some skim crap (my how often that shows up in
culinary discourse) with butter in it. The start of a cream coating for the
pasta.

For a pound of pasta, let's build a hypothetical dressing. 1/2 cup milk,
three tablespoons butter and a garlic clove (mashed and very finely minced)
heated until the butter melts and it comes to a boil. Stir to distribute
the butter and to poach the garlic. Reduce to about 1/3 cup - the reduction
will thicken a bit and have a richer mouthfeel. More butter wouldn't hurt
it, nor would a couple tablespoons bacon fat.

Meanwhile, break an egg into a large bowl and add 1/4 cup parmesan cheese
and some fresh, flat leaf parsley. A good grating of black pepper. When the
pasta is done, drain it. Dump the milk reduction into the bowl with the egg
and whisk furiously to mix it all together. Dump the pasta in and toss
quickly to full coat. Serve immediately. More cheese at table.

Description:
"This is a half-assed approximation of a French Sauce Batard (q.v.)
that itself is enormously flexible."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Per serving: 778 Calories (kcal); 75g Total Fat; (86% calories from fat);
18g Protein; 8g Carbohydrate; 339mg Cholesterol; 982mg Sodium
Food Exchanges: 0 Grain(Starch); 2 Lean Meat; 0 Vegetable; 0 Fruit; 13 1/2
Fat; 0 Other Carbohydrates

NOTES : This is a satisfying, creamy dish that can be extended by dropping
in some cooked, chopped bacon for a fake Carbonara or some veggies for a
fake primavera or some leftover lobster, truffles and caviar if the queen
pops in suddenly unannounced. It's a good base for adding lots of different
things either as extenders or as flavorings. Or both.

zxcvbob > said:

> I saw that, but since it has bacon and eggs in it (remember your
> "breakfast alfredo" comment?) I wasn't sure it was close enough.

The bacon grease is purely optional. It's either more butter or some bacon
grease.

Carol

Bob Myers wrote:
> "Bob (this one)" > wrote in message
> ...
>
>>>But try Pastorio's Half-Assed ******* Sauce. That's a real sauce!
>>
>>I would characterize it more as "saucelike" or "sauce-istic."
>
> "Possessing certain sauceateric qualities"?

I appreciate your enlargement of the language.

> "Almost, but not quite, completely unlike sauce"? (Apologies to
> Douglas Adams...)
>
> Bob (this other one) M.

<LOL> Exactly.

Pastorio

Damsel wrote:
> zxcvbob > said:
>
>
>>What would be a good name for a creamy pasta sauce with a *lot* of
>>Parmesan cheese in it? (serious question) I'll give you that "Alfredo
>>sauce" is not a very good name because it's confusing.
>
>
> I asked Bob the same question. Go back and look for "Pastorio's Half-Assed
> ******* Sauce". I posted it as a recipe in a separate thread.

Russ Parsons (LATimes food guy) did a bunch of research about beans. To
soak, to salt, etc. and wrote a good piece about it, I dunno, maybe half
a dozen years ago. I asked him if it still gets any play since he was
pretty much the first to do all that. He said that it seems to be the
thing he'll be remembered for; that people still ask him questions about
it all.

Pastorio

"Bob (this one)" > said:

> Damsel wrote:
> > zxcvbob > said:
> >
> >>What would be a good name for a creamy pasta sauce with a *lot* of
> >>Parmesan cheese in it? (serious question) I'll give you that "Alfredo
> >>sauce" is not a very good name because it's confusing.
> >
> > I asked Bob the same question. Go back and look for "Pastorio's Half-Assed
> > ******* Sauce". I posted it as a recipe in a separate thread.
>
> Russ Parsons (LATimes food guy) did a bunch of research about beans. To
> soak, to salt, etc. and wrote a good piece about it, I dunno, maybe half
> a dozen years ago. I asked him if it still gets any play since he was
> pretty much the first to do all that. He said that it seems to be the
> thing he'll be remembered for; that people still ask him questions about
> it all.

So you're saying that your headstone will read:
ROBERT PASTORIO
Creator of Pastorio's Half-Assed ******* Sauce
??

Carol

Damsel wrote:
> "Bob (this one)" > said:
>
>
>>Damsel wrote:
>>
>>>zxcvbob > said:
>>>
>>>
>>>>What would be a good name for a creamy pasta sauce with a *lot* of
>>>>Parmesan cheese in it? (serious question) I'll give you that "Alfredo
>>>>sauce" is not a very good name because it's confusing.
>>>
>>>I asked Bob the same question. Go back and look for "Pastorio's Half-Assed
>>>******* Sauce". I posted it as a recipe in a separate thread.
>>
>>Russ Parsons (LATimes food guy) did a bunch of research about beans. To
>>soak, to salt, etc. and wrote a good piece about it, I dunno, maybe half
>>a dozen years ago. I asked him if it still gets any play since he was
>>pretty much the first to do all that. He said that it seems to be the
>>thing he'll be remembered for; that people still ask him questions about
>>it all.
>
> So you're saying that your headstone will read:
> ROBERT PASTORIO
> Creator of Pastorio's Half-Assed ******* Sauce
> ??

Seems so, if it's up to you... <LOL>

How will I ever face... um...

Nevermind. They already know.

Pastorio

Mi e' parso che Bob (this one) abbia scritto:

>> "Possessing certain sauceateric qualities"?

> I appreciate your enlargement of the language.

He's probably answered to some spam
--
Vilco
Think Pink , Drink Rose'

Mi e' parso che Damsel abbia scritto:

> Turns out, Fettucini Alfredo is nothing more than a bowl
> of hot pasta, some melted butter, and some Parmesan
> tossed into the whole mess. No cream. Definitely not a
> sauce.

Hey, but so it gets "pasta al burro e parmigiano" !

> F.A. is what I eat when there's nothing else in
> the house. I'm *so* disillusioned.

LOL, me too! Exactly the same: when there's nothing else, or when
my fantasy is under my shoes, I go for it.
--
Vilco
Think Pink , Drink Rose'

"Vilco" > ha scritto nel messaggio
...
> Mi e' parso che Damsel abbia scritto:
>
>> Turns out, Fettucini Alfredo is nothing more than a bowl
>> of hot pasta, some melted butter, and some Parmesan
>> tossed into the whole mess. No cream. Definitely not a
>> sauce.
>
> Hey, but so it gets "pasta al burro e parmigiano" !
>
>> F.A. is what I eat when there's nothing else in
>> the house. I'm *so* disillusioned.

I eat when I am sick )
Pandora

Mi e' parso che Damsel abbia scritto:

> I thought Alfredo was a sauce until you told
> me that the cheese would never melt into the butter.

Grated Parmigiano Reggiano does melt in the butter, given enough
temperature and time. You can see that because you obtain a
creamy thing where there's no more track of the "grated bits" of
cheese, just a creamy whole.
--
Vilco
Think Pink , Drink Rose'

<day dreamer@dream .com@> wrote in message
...
> On Thu, 4 Aug 2005 13:01:51 +0100, "Shaun aRe"
> > wrote:
>
> >Look, right, see - forget about all that - tell me, WTF constitutes the
> >definition of a... *pie* ?
> >Well HUH?
> >Shaun aRe
> >
> Well let's see. Pie = "The ratio of the circumference to the diameter
> of a circle 3.12159265...........on and on.....".

NO! *THAT* would be 'pi', roughly rounded it is 3.1415926. And crusty. Must
be crusty...


Shaun aRe

Mi e' parso che Pandora abbia scritto:

>>> F.A. is what I eat when there's nothing else in
>>> the house. I'm *so* disillusioned.

> I eat when I am sick )
> Pandora

In those situations I prefer rice, same condiments
--
Vilco
Think Pink , Drink Rose'

"AlleyGator" > wrote in message
...
> day dreamer@dream .com@ wrote:
>
> >Well let's see. Pie = "The ratio of the circumference to the diameter
> >of a circle 3.12159265...........on and on.....".
> >
> >
>
> and never forget - pi are not square, pi are round.

But how does one get a square meal from a round pie, silly?!?





Shaun aRe

"Bob Myers" > wrote in message
...
>
> "Shaun aRe" > wrote in message
> eenews.net...
>
> > Look, right, see - forget about all that - tell me, WTF constitutes the
> > definition of a... *pie* ?
>
> Anything that would suitable for throwing into one's face in
> a Three Stooges movie...:-)

Cow pat?

',;~}~



Shaun aRe

"Vilco" > ha scritto nel messaggio
...
> Mi e' parso che Pandora abbia scritto:
>
>>>> F.A. is what I eat when there's nothing else in
>>>> the house. I'm *so* disillusioned.
>
>> I eat when I am sick )
>> Pandora
>
> In those situations I prefer rice, same condiments

Oh yes! I also prefer rice!!! oil EVOOO and soy sauce. It's more healthy!
Pandora

On Fri, 5 Aug 2005 11:44:24 +0100, "Shaun aRe"
> wrote:

>
><day dreamer@dream .com@> wrote in message
.. .
>> On Thu, 4 Aug 2005 13:01:51 +0100, "Shaun aRe"
>> > wrote:
>>
>> >Look, right, see - forget about all that - tell me, WTF constitutes the
>> >definition of a... *pie* ?
>> >Well HUH?
>> >Shaun aRe
>> >
>> Well let's see. Pie = "The ratio of the circumference to the diameter
>> of a circle 3.12159265...........on and on.....".
>
>NO! *THAT* would be 'pi', roughly rounded it is 3.1415926. And crusty. Must
>be crusty...
>
>
>Shaun aRe
>
D!OH, I am old and crusty, does that count?

"Shaun aRe" > wrote in message
eenews.net...

> > Anything that would suitable for throwing into one's face in
> > a Three Stooges movie...:-)
>
> Cow pat?

What, you ain't never heered o' one a' them things
bein' called a "cow pie"?

Durn city folks, enny weigh...

Bob M.

(S'mee [AKA Jani]) wrote:

>When asked about his favorite type of pie, my father always replies
>"round". I really need to make him a square one sometime...

My dad's response was that he like 2 pies - hot and cold.

--
The Doc says my brain waves closely match those of a crazed ferret.
At least now I have an excuse.

One time on Usenet, x-no-archive: yes said:
> (S'mee [AKA Jani]) wrote:

> >When asked about his favorite type of pie, my father always replies
> >"round". I really need to make him a square one sometime...
>
> My dad's response was that he like 2 pies - hot and cold.

Hey, I'm seeing my Dad tomorrow, I'll mention this to him... :-)

--
Jani in WA (S'mee)
~ mom, VidGamer, novice cook, dieter ~