wrote:
:: In the eye of hurricane Katrina, Michael Smithe was cooking an
Omulet
:: in his New Orleans kitchen. Suddenly the omulet came to life and
:: jumped out of the frying pan, hitting Smithe in the face and
knocking
:: him unconscious on his kitchen floor. The omulet then crashed thru
:: his kitchen window and was sucked out into the atmosphere by the
:: hurricane winds.
::



BATON ROUGE, LA. - The White House announced today that President Bush
has
successfully sold the state of Louisiana back to the French at more
than
double its original selling price of $11,250,000.

"This is a bold step forward for America," said Bush. "And America
will be
stronger and better as a result. I stand here today in unity with
French
Prime Minister Jack Sharaq, who was so kind to accept my offer of
Louisiana
in exchange for 25 million dollars cash."

The state, ravaged by Hurricane Katrina, will cost hundreds of
billions of
dollars to rebuild.

"Jack understands full well that this one's a 'fixer upper,'" said
Bush. "He
and the French people are quite prepared to pump out all that water,
and
make Louisiana a decent place to live again. And they've got a lot of
work
to do. But Jack's assured me, if it's not right, they're going to fix
it."

The move has been met with incredulity from the beleaguered residents
of
Louisiana.

"Shuba-pie!" said New Orleans resident Willis Babineaux. "Frafer-perly
yum
kom drabby sham!"

However, President Bush's decision has been widely lauded by
Republicans.

"This is an unexpected but brilliant move by the President," said
Senate
Majority Leader Bill Frist. "Instead of spending billions and
billions, and
billions of dollars rebuilding the state of Louisiana, we've just made
25
million dollars in pure profit."

"This is indeed a smart move," commented Fox News analyst Brit Hume.
"Not
only have we stopped the flooding in our own budget, we've made money
on the
deal.
The money gained from 'T'he Louisiana Refund' is expected to be
immediately
pumped into the rebuilding of Iraq.

Jim wrote:
> BATON ROUGE, LA. - The White House announced today that President Bush
> has
> successfully sold the state of Louisiana back to the French at more
> than
> double its original selling price of $11,250,000.
>
> "This is a bold step forward for America," said Bush. "And America
> will be
> stronger and better as a result. I stand here today in unity with
> French
> Prime Minister Jack Sharaq, who was so kind to accept my offer of
> Louisiana
> in exchange for 25 million dollars cash."
>
> The state, ravaged by Hurricane Katrina, will cost hundreds of
> billions of
> dollars to rebuild.
>
> "Jack understands full well that this one's a 'fixer upper,'" said
> Bush. "He
> and the French people are quite prepared to pump out all that water,
> and
> make Louisiana a decent place to live again. And they've got a lot of
> work
> to do. But Jack's assured me, if it's not right, they're going to fix
> it."
>
> The move has been met with incredulity from the beleaguered residents
> of
> Louisiana.
>
> "Shuba-pie!" said New Orleans resident Willis Babineaux. "Frafer-perly
> yum
> kom drabby sham!"
>
> However, President Bush's decision has been widely lauded by
> Republicans.
>
> "This is an unexpected but brilliant move by the President," said
> Senate
> Majority Leader Bill Frist. "Instead of spending billions and
> billions, and
> billions of dollars rebuilding the state of Louisiana, we've just made
> 25
> million dollars in pure profit."
>
> "This is indeed a smart move," commented Fox News analyst Brit Hume.
> "Not
> only have we stopped the flooding in our own budget, we've made money
> on the
> deal.
> The money gained from 'T'he Louisiana Refund' is expected to be
> immediately
> pumped into the rebuilding of Iraq.


What wasn't included in this release is that all present and former
Louisiana residents are being deported back to Canada. Canadian
government representatives could not be reached for comment.

pennyaline wrote:

>
> What wasn't included in this release is that all present and former
> Louisiana residents are being deported back to Canada. Canadian
> government representatives could not be reached for comment.

No thanks. We don't want them. They never were Canadian. They were booted out
of Acadia because they couldn't be trusted not to keep their word not to
attack the American Colonies. They were evicted 100 years before Canada became
a country.

In article >, Jim
> wrote:

>
> BATON ROUGE, LA. - The White House announced today that President Bush
> has
> successfully sold the state of Louisiana back to the French at more
> than
> double its original selling price of $11,250,000.
>

Hmmmmm. I'll have to think about this. It just might work. If sold,
those conservative screwballs in Shreveport couldn't keep trying to
take the spice out of New Orleans' hot sauce.

And if the sale could be extended to the Louisiana Purchase, think of
all those wuthless red states that we'd git shut of. But I don't think
France could handle Kansas and Montana. I suspect they might try to
sell them to Iran where fundamentalism is a way of life.

"Stark" > wrote in message
> And if the sale could be extended to the Louisiana Purchase, think of
> all those wuthless red states that we'd git shut of. But I don't think
> France could handle Kansas and Montana. I suspect they might try to
> sell them to Iran where fundamentalism is a way of life.

I've had this idea of getting rid of the many politicians in Washington by
combining states. Do we really need 100 senators? Let cut it in half or
more. There won't be any North and South anything. Just make one big
Carolina. Same with Dakota, but toss in Nebraska too as no one pays much
attention to it anyway.

Delaware and Maryland hardly take up any space so combine them with the
Virginias. New Jersey has become a suburb of New York, so split it and give
the other half to PA. Arizona, New Mexico, Utah, Colorado makes a nice box
of a state. You get the idea. Now we double the number of citizens
represented by House members and effectively cut that group by half too.
Can you see the streamlined efficient Congress now?

In article >, Edwin
Pawlowski > wrote:

> "Stark" > wrote in message
> > And if the sale could be extended to the Louisiana Purchase, think of
> > all those wuthless red states that we'd git shut of. But I don't think
> > France could handle Kansas and Montana. I suspect they might try to
> > sell them to Iran where fundamentalism is a way of life.
>
> I've had this idea of getting rid of the many politicians in Washington by
> combining states. Do we really need 100 senators? Let cut it in half or
> more. There won't be any North and South anything. Just make one big
> Carolina. Same with Dakota, but toss in Nebraska too as no one pays much
> attention to it anyway.
>
> Delaware and Maryland hardly take up any space so combine them with the
> Virginias. New Jersey has become a suburb of New York, so split it and give
> the other half to PA. Arizona, New Mexico, Utah, Colorado makes a nice box
> of a state. You get the idea. Now we double the number of citizens
> represented by House members and effectively cut that group by half too.
> Can you see the streamlined efficient Congress now?
>
>
Don't forget Tenntucky and Missibama. Don't know what to do with
Georgia. Move the Braves to Chattanooga, then sell it too along with
Florida and Texas.