Hello,

I am useless at cooking; I can barely boil an egg. My wife has suffered
a bad accident and will be hospitalised until next week. I would like
to surprise her with a home made cake on her return, a chocolate type
with that sort of chocolate topping, about enough for four people.

Can someone direct me to or reply with an idiot's recipe and guide on
how I make this without any electrical mixing equipment (I can get a
whisk or any other simple kit). Also, if it's feasible to pipe it
cheaply, that would be good too. It's an electric fan oven.

Thanks,

Paul.

wrote:
> Hello,
>
> I am useless at cooking; I can barely boil an egg. My wife has suffered
> a bad accident and will be hospitalised until next week. I would like
> to surprise her with a home made cake on her return, a chocolate type
> with that sort of chocolate topping, about enough for four people.
>
> Can someone direct me to or reply with an idiot's recipe and guide on
> how I make this without any electrical mixing equipment (I can get a
> whisk or any other simple kit). Also, if it's feasible to pipe it
> cheaply, that would be good too. It's an electric fan oven.
>
> Thanks,
>
> Paul.


My advice to you since you know nothing about cooking would be to buy a
cake from a bakery. Or you could ask a neighbor to bake a cake that
you had bought the ingredients for in advance.

Just my thought.

wrote:

> Hello,
>
> I am useless at cooking; I can barely boil an egg. My wife has suffered
> a bad accident and will be hospitalised until next week. I would like
> to surprise her with a home made cake on her return, a chocolate type
> with that sort of chocolate topping, about enough for four people.
>
> Can someone direct me to or reply with an idiot's recipe and guide on
> how I make this without any electrical mixing equipment (I can get a
> whisk or any other simple kit). Also, if it's feasible to pipe it
> cheaply, that would be good too. It's an electric fan oven.
>
> Thanks,
>
> Paul.
>

Or buy a mix - they are pretty foolproof. What a nice thought.

wrote:

> Hello,
>
> I am useless at cooking; I can barely boil an egg. My wife has suffered
> a bad accident and will be hospitalised until next week. I would like
> to surprise her with a home made cake on her return, a chocolate type
> with that sort of chocolate topping, about enough for four people.
>
> Can someone direct me to or reply with an idiot's recipe and guide on
> how I make this without any electrical mixing equipment (I can get a
> whisk or any other simple kit). Also, if it's feasible to pipe it
> cheaply, that would be good too. It's an electric fan oven.
>
> Thanks,
>
> Paul.
>


Do you have a 9x13" rectangular cake pan or lasagne pan? I highly
recommend baking the cake in a 9x13" pan and serving it from the pan
instead of trying to make a layer cake.

This isn't quite what you were asking for, but it's close. You could
make this cake and frost it with ready-to-spread frosting from the store
(let the cake cool before trying to frost it)


Chocolate Oatmeal Cake

1 Cup oatmeal
1 1/2 Cup boiling water
1/2 Cup margarine
1/2 C cocoa
1 Cup sugar
1 Cup brown sugar
2 eggs
1 1/3 Cup flour
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp. salt
1 tsp. vanilla extract

Mix oatmeal, cocoa, and boiling water and let stand 20 minutes. Cream
margarine, sugars, vanilla, and eggs. Add oatmeal mixture and mix well.
Sift flour soda and salt; add to oatmeal-sugar-egg mixture and beat
well. Bake in greased 9x13" pan at 350 degrees for 35 minutes.

Frosting: Mix 1/4 C margarine, 1/2 C brown sugar, 3 Tbsp “half and
half”, 1/3 C chopped pecans, 3/4 C coconut. Spread over cake, broil
until bubbly and coconut is toasted.

Bob

I like the Cake Bible by Rose Beranbaum (sp?). Her cakes always come
out well. I'd try something like a chocolate mayonnaise cake. I know
it sounds wierd, but it is an easy recipe that I made as a kid, and it
is pretty successful. The mayo has eggs and oil. It is a rich, moist
cake.

I was a purist when I started out baking and mixed everything by hand.
It is much easier to use a mixer, even a hand mixer or one of the old
fashioned ones that has a crank that turns the beaters. By piping, do
you mean piping the icing/frosting? This takes a little practice, but
my kids have watched me do it and now at ages 10 & 12 get a kick out of
piping icing. Its not perfect, but passable.

I think it is sweet that you want to do something so personal for your
wife and wish you luck.

Moe


wrote:
> Hello,
>
> I am useless at cooking; I can barely boil an egg. My wife has suffered
> a bad accident and will be hospitalised until next week. I would like
> to surprise her with a home made cake on her return, a chocolate type
> with that sort of chocolate topping, about enough for four people.
>
> Can someone direct me to or reply with an idiot's recipe and guide on
> how I make this without any electrical mixing equipment (I can get a
> whisk or any other simple kit). Also, if it's feasible to pipe it
> cheaply, that would be good too. It's an electric fan oven.
>
> Thanks,
>
> Paul.

> wrote in message
oups.com...
> Hello,
>
> I am useless at cooking; I can barely boil an egg. My wife has suffered
> a bad accident and will be hospitalised until next week. I would like
> to surprise her with a home made cake on her return, a chocolate type
> with that sort of chocolate topping, about enough for four people.
>
> Can someone direct me to or reply with an idiot's recipe and guide on
> how I make this without any electrical mixing equipment (I can get a
> whisk or any other simple kit). Also, if it's feasible to pipe it
> cheaply, that would be good too. It's an electric fan oven.
>
> Thanks,
>
> Paul.

Here's one my kids made when they were 8 and 10. I never put frosting on
it, just sprinkle with powdered sugar. If you just have to have frosting
you could use the stuff that comes in a tub. Just mix it with a whisk.

Ms P


* Exported from MasterCook *

Wacky Cake

Recipe By :
Serving Size : 9 Preparation Time :0:10
Categories : Cakes

Amount Measure Ingredient -- Preparation Method
-------- ------------ --------------------------------
1 cup sugar
1 1/2 cups flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
3 tablespoons cocoa
1/2 teaspoon salt
6 tablespoons oil
1 tablespoon vinegar
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 cup water

Mix dry ingredients into large bowl.

Mix all the liquids together in measureing cup.

Pour the liquids into the dry ingredients, stir until smooth.

Pour batter into greased 8 inch square pan. Bake at 350° for 35 to 40
minutes or until pick inserted in center comes out clean.

Here is a link to a chocolate mayonnaise cake. There are a lot on the
web.

http://southernfood.about.com/od/cho...r/bl01018a.htm

"Moe" > wrote

>I like the Cake Bible by Rose Beranbaum (sp?). Her cakes always come
> out well. I'd try something like a chocolate mayonnaise cake.

I cannot believe you said that!! That's what I was planning to say.

Make that using a devil's food cake mix. The supermarket probably has
mixers for sale, cheap, but you don't really have to have that. They
will also have icing in little cans or tubes that you can write with, that's
what you mean, right? It comes in colors.

You can use canned frosting if you want, I'd prefer homemade but
I don't know if you want to bother with that ... you already have it
covered that you put out so much effort.

"PERFECTLY CHOCOLATE" CHOCOLATE FROSTING

1 stick (1/2 cup) butter or margarine
2/3 cup HERSHEY'S Cocoa
3 cups powdered sugar
1/3 cup milk
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

Melt butter. Stir in cocoa. Alternately add powdered sugar and milk,
beating to spreading consistency. Add small amount additional milk,
if needed. Stir in vanilla. About 2 cups frosting.

Bet of luck to you and your wife.

nancy

"zxcvbob" > wrote in message
...
> wrote:
>
> > Hello,
> >
> > I am useless at cooking; I can barely boil an egg. My wife has suffered
> > a bad accident and will be hospitalised until next week. I would like
> > to surprise her with a home made cake on her return, a chocolate type
> > with that sort of chocolate topping, about enough for four people.
> >
> > Can someone direct me to or reply with an idiot's recipe and guide on
> > how I make this without any electrical mixing equipment (I can get a
> > whisk or any other simple kit). Also, if it's feasible to pipe it
> > cheaply, that would be good too. It's an electric fan oven.
> >
> > Thanks,
> >
> > Paul.
> >
>
>
> Do you have a 9x13" rectangular cake pan or lasagne pan? I highly
> recommend baking the cake in a 9x13" pan and serving it from the pan
> instead of trying to make a layer cake.

Using a square pan is an EXCELLENT idea. You don't want to get into
manipulating layers and frosting, it will be too frustrating. At the same
time, you can decorate a square cake very nicely and they are easy to work
with. Good luck and have fun.

On Wed, 23 Nov 2005 14:25:50 -0500, "Nancy Young"
> wrote:

>"PERFECTLY CHOCOLATE" CHOCOLATE FROSTING
>
>1 stick (1/2 cup) butter or margarine
>2/3 cup HERSHEY'S Cocoa
>3 cups powdered sugar
>1/3 cup milk
>1 teaspoon vanilla extract
>
>Melt butter. Stir in cocoa. Alternately add powdered sugar and milk,
>beating to spreading consistency. Add small amount additional milk,
>if needed. Stir in vanilla. About 2 cups frosting.


And underneath that, use the Hershey's Perfectly Chocolate Chocolate
Cake. Just cut the ingredients in half for a square cake pan. Bake
for 30-35 minutes.

This is a wonderfully moist cake. The best chocolate cake I've ever
had, and it's easy to make.

I hope your wife will come out of the hospital well, and will enjoy
the cake. And treasure you even more.


* Exported from MasterCook *

Hershey's "Perfectly Chocolate" Chocolate Cake

Recipe By :Hershey's
Serving Size : 12 Preparation Time :0:00
Categories : cakes chocolate


Amount Measure Ingredient -- Preparation Method
-------- ------------ --------------------------------
2 cups sugar
1 3/4 cups flour
3/4 cup cocoa
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1 1/2 teaspoons baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
2 eggs
1 cup milk
1/2 cup vegetable oil
2 teaspoons vanilla
1 cup boiling water

1. Heat oven to 350°F. Grease and flour two 9-inch round baking pans.
2. Stir together sugar, flour, cocoa, baking powder, baking soda and
salt in large bowl. Add eggs, milk, oil and vanilla; beat on medium
speed of mixer 2 minutes. Stir in boiling water (batter will be thin).
Pour batter into prepared pans.

3. Bake 30 to 35 minutes or until wooden pick inserted in center comes
out clean. Cool 10 minutes; remove from pans to wire racks. Cool
completely. Frost with "PERFECTLY CHOCOLATE" CHOCOLATE FROSTING. 10
to 12 servings.

VARIATIONS:
ONE-PAN CAKE: Grease and flour 13x9x2-inch baking pan. Heat oven to
350°F. Pour batter into prepared pan. Bake 35 to 40 minutes. Cool
completely. Frost.

THREE LAYER CAKE: Grease and flour three 8-inch round baking pans.
Heat oven to 350°F. Pour batter into prepared pans. Bake 30 to 35
minutes. Cool 10 minutes; remove from pans to wire racks. Cool
completely. Frost.

BUNDT CAKE: Grease and flour 12-cup Bundt pan. Heat oven to 350°F.
Pour batter into prepared pan. Bake 50 to 55 minutes. Cool 15 minutes;
remove from pan to wire rack. Cool completely. Frost.

CUPCAKES: Line muffin cups (2-1/2 inches in diameter) with paper bake
cups. Heat oven to 350°F. Fill cups 2/3 full with batter. Bake 22 to
25 minutes. Cool completely. Frost. About 30 cupcakes.

Source:
"http://hersheyrecipes.hersheys.com/"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
--
Wash away the gray to respond.

Come on, folks. The man asked for a simple recipe and
he has received very few.

As far as specific brands, did anyone notice he's in the UK?

ALthough this isn't cake, it's chocolate and wonderful.
Ms. Schaller is away from home, I believe, but I don't
think she'd mind sharing the recipe with you.
Brownies are moist, deep chocolate, usually served cut into squares.

Barb Schaller's Famous Orgasmic Chocolate Brownies

8 tablespoons (1 stick) unsalted butter
2 ounces unsweetened baking chocolate (good quality!)
2/3 cup plain cake flour
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1 cup granulated sugar
2 large eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 cup chopped nuts (optional) (walnuts or pecans are nice)

Adjust oven rack to center position and heat oven to 350 degrees F.
Melt butter and chocolate together in medium saucepan set over
simmering water OR in a 2-quart bowl in a microwave on medium power;
set aside to cool for about 5-10 minutes.

Measure flour, baking powder, and salt into a small bowl and whisk
briefly to combine; set aside.

Whisk sugar into cooled chocolate mixture. Whisk in eggs and vanilla,
then fold in flour mixture (and nuts, if using them) until just
combined.

Pour batter into greased 8-inch square metal pan, smooth into corners;
bake until toothpick inserted halfway between center and edge of pan
comes out with a few fudgy crumbs, about 23-25 minutes. If batter
coats toothpick, return pan to oven and bake 2 to 4 minutes more. Cool
brownies completely in pan set on a wire rack. Cut into squares and
serve. (Pan may be wrapped in plastic, then foil, for up to 2 days -
to preserve moistness, cut and remove brownies only as needed.)

Or: Double the recipe and use a 9x13x2-inch pan and bake about 30-35
minutes; not too long. Test for doneness.

gloria p

Puester wrote:

> Come on, folks. The man asked for a simple recipe and
> he has received very few.
>
> As far as specific brands, did anyone notice he's in the UK?

That's very noble of you Puester. The guy comes into the group out of
nowhere, indicates that he can't even boil and egg and he wants to bake a
cake from scratch. I thought the pudding response was appropriate for an
obvious troll.

> ha scritto nel messaggio
oups.com...
> Hello,
>
> I am useless at cooking; I can barely boil an egg. My wife has suffered
> a bad accident and will be hospitalised until next week. I would like
> to surprise her with a home made cake on her return, a chocolate type
> with that sort of chocolate topping, about enough for four people.
>
> Can someone direct me to or reply with an idiot's recipe and guide on
> how I make this without any electrical mixing equipment (I can get a
> whisk or any other simple kit). Also, if it's feasible to pipe it
> cheaply, that would be good too. It's an electric fan oven.
>
> Thanks,
>
> Paul.

Make a "zuppa inglese", it is very simple or idiot (as you define it). I've
posted recipe some weeks ago (with photo). You need only a sponge cake (you
can buy it ready), custard and whipped cream.
Cheers
Pandora
>

Wow! What a wonderful response! Thank you all!

Yes, I am in the UK, but I can 'translate' where necessary anyway.

Well, I'm off to the shops this morning after carefully re-reading
these and choosing one that I think I can attempt.

Thanks again.

Regards,

Paul
wrote:
> Hello,
>
> I am useless at cooking; I can barely boil an egg. My wife has suffered
> a bad accident and will be hospitalised until next week. I would like
> to surprise her with a home made cake on her return, a chocolate type
> with that sort of chocolate topping, about enough for four people.
>
> Can someone direct me to or reply with an idiot's recipe and guide on
> how I make this without any electrical mixing equipment (I can get a
> whisk or any other simple kit). Also, if it's feasible to pipe it
> cheaply, that would be good too. It's an electric fan oven.
>
> Thanks,
>
> Paul.