Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?

Just sayin.

nancy

"Nancy Young" > wrote in message
...
> Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
> out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
> a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
>
> Just sayin.
>
> nancy

Who is this *they*?!?


Just askin'.




Shaun aRe, even split muffins here thanks.

"Shaun aRe" > wrote

> "Nancy Young" > wrote

>> Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
>> out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
>> a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
>>
>> Just sayin.

> Who is this *they*?!?

> Just askin'.

> Shaun aRe, even split muffins here thanks.

Oh, don't play like you don't know ... Thomas', that
bakery from England. Came over here with the uneven
muffins.

nancy

"Nancy Young" > wrote in message
...
>
> "Shaun aRe" > wrote
>
> > "Nancy Young" > wrote
>
> >> Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
> >> out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
> >> a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
> >>
> >> Just sayin.
>
> > Who is this *they*?!?
>
> > Just askin'.
>
> > Shaun aRe, even split muffins here thanks.
>
> Oh, don't play like you don't know ... Thomas', that
> bakery from England. Came over here with the uneven
> muffins.

I don' believe you - they must be Americanian muffins not Englundiaish ones.


Shaun aRe

Nancy Young wrote:
> Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
> out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
> a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
>
> Just sayin.
>
> nancy
>
>
Also, no matter how you handle them, the two halves always stick
together. But once you pry the halves apart, toast them, butter them
and put some very special jam on them (Blushing Peach today, which has
nothing to blush about), you forget all about the inconveniences that
you encountered. This was a really good breakfast this morning!

"Margaret Suran" > wrote

> Nancy Young wrote:
>> Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
>> out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
>> a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?

> Also, no matter how you handle them, the two halves always stick
> together. But once you pry the halves apart, toast them, butter them and
> put some very special jam on them (Blushing Peach today, which has nothing
> to blush about), you forget all about the inconveniences that you
> encountered. This was a really good breakfast this morning!

I love english muffins for breakfast! Once you pry the larger
'half' out of the toaster and dig for the smaller one (with a metal
knife, natch), you're good to go.

nancy

Nancy Young wrote:
>
> I love english muffins for breakfast! Once you pry the larger
> 'half' out of the toaster and dig for the smaller one (with a metal
> knife, natch), you're good to go.
>
Toaster oven. What I find amusing about English muffins is that they
were (intelligently) designed to encourage you to slather on a lot of
butter, yet cream cheese works so well on them. -ae,

"aem" > wrote

> Nancy Young wrote:
>>
>> I love english muffins for breakfast! Once you pry the larger
>> 'half' out of the toaster and dig for the smaller one (with a metal
>> knife, natch), you're good to go.
>>
> Toaster oven.

Actually, I have been toying with the idea of getting a
toaster oven, no, not to make toast, but I'm going to look
at them. I think I'd really like one in the summer, especially.

Or for the occasional leftover eggroll.

> What I find amusing about English muffins is that they
> were (intelligently) designed to encourage you to slather on a lot of
> butter, yet cream cheese works so well on them.

I do love both of those in unseemly quantities ... and
english muffins make for great delivery systems.

nancy

Nancy Young wrote:

> Actually, I have been toying with the idea of getting a
> toaster oven, no, not to make toast, but I'm going to look
> at them. I think I'd really like one in the summer, especially.
>
> Or for the occasional leftover eggroll.

i love my toaster oven nancy. i use it all the time. it goes on the back
porch in the summer so i bake / roast small stuff without heating up the
house. i routinely roast a chicken leg quarter and a potato in it at the
same time. great for biscuits too!

On Wed, 18 Jan 2006 10:44:40 -0500, "Nancy Young"
> wrote:

>
>"Margaret Suran" > wrote
>
>> Nancy Young wrote:
>>> Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
>>> out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
>>> a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
>
>> Also, no matter how you handle them, the two halves always stick
>> together. But once you pry the halves apart, toast them, butter them and
>> put some very special jam on them (Blushing Peach today, which has nothing
>> to blush about), you forget all about the inconveniences that you
>> encountered. This was a really good breakfast this morning!
>
>I love english muffins for breakfast! Once you pry the larger
>'half' out of the toaster and dig for the smaller one (with a metal
>knife, natch), you're good to go.

I have two words for you: Toaster oven. :-)

serene, who never has to pry toast/muffins/bagels out of anywhere

On Wed, 18 Jan 2006 12:04:42 -0800, serene wrote:

> On Wed, 18 Jan 2006 10:44:40 -0500, "Nancy Young"
> > wrote:
>
> >> Also, no matter how you handle them, the two halves always stick
> >> together. But once you pry the halves apart, toast them, butter them and
> >> put some very special jam on them (Blushing Peach today, which has nothing
> >> to blush about), you forget all about the inconveniences that you
> >> encountered. This was a really good breakfast this morning!
> >
> >I love english muffins for breakfast! Once you pry the larger
> >'half' out of the toaster and dig for the smaller one (with a metal
> >knife, natch), you're good to go.
>
> I have two words for you: Toaster oven. :-)
>
> serene, who never has to pry toast/muffins/bagels out of anywhere

or you can switch to a Cuisanart toaster, which someone so eloquently
said "ejects" the toast.... right out of the toaster and onto the
counter, just like a cartoon.
--

Practice safe eating. Always use condiments.

Someone wrote:
> >
> > I have two words for you: Toaster oven. :-)
> >
> > serene, who never has to pry toast/muffins/bagels out of anywhere
>
> or you can switch to a Cuisanart toaster, which someone so eloquently
> said "ejects" the toast.... right out of the toaster and onto the
> counter, just like a cartoon.

---------------------------
We had a dog, a big comical Irish Water Spaniel. As soon as he heard
the toaster clicking away, he would rush to the scene, cock his head
sideways, and wait for the toast to fly out of the toaster--and he
would catch it in his mouth. If you wanted your own piece of toast,
you had to put him on the other side of the door.

Happy memories,
Nancree

On Wed, 18 Jan 2006 22:27:43 -0800, sf >
wrote:

>or you can switch to a Cuisanart toaster, which someone so eloquently
>said "ejects" the toast.... right out of the toaster and onto the
>counter, just like a cartoon.

Ohmigod, I would *hate* that. Does it really do that?

serene

"sf" > wrote in message
...
> On Wed, 18 Jan 2006 12:04:42 -0800, serene wrote:
>
> > On Wed, 18 Jan 2006 10:44:40 -0500, "Nancy Young"
> > > wrote:
> >
> > >> Also, no matter how you handle them, the two halves always stick
> > >> together. But once you pry the halves apart, toast them, butter
them and
> > >> put some very special jam on them (Blushing Peach today, which has
nothing
> > >> to blush about), you forget all about the inconveniences that you
> > >> encountered. This was a really good breakfast this morning!
> > >
> > >I love english muffins for breakfast! Once you pry the larger
> > >'half' out of the toaster and dig for the smaller one (with a metal
> > >knife, natch), you're good to go.
> >
> > I have two words for you: Toaster oven. :-)
> >
> > serene, who never has to pry toast/muffins/bagels out of anywhere
>
> or you can switch to a Cuisanart toaster, which someone so eloquently
> said "ejects" the toast.... right out of the toaster and onto the
> counter, just like a cartoon.

I was lucky enough to buy a really good four slice toaster almost four years
ago. It's a Hamilton Beach/Proctor Silex Intellitoast model of toaster.

The box itself advertises several features, but the one that's the most
useful after the toasting cycle is done is the toast boost function.

Here's the specifics on the "toast boost" function: when the toast pops up,
the levers can be manually lifted up about one half inch more. Lifting the
levers up that extra distance also lifts the toast further out of the slots.
(When the levers are released, they back drop down the same small amount to
the original popped up position.) That's really helpful for smaller slices
of toast, english muffins, and sliced bagels.

(The specific model I have, according to the sticker at the bottom of the
toaster, is model number 24508, type T28, series A2320S.)

Nancy Young wrote:
> Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
> out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
> a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
>
> Just sayin.

I don't know where you get yours but my Thomas' are all virgins... I
fork em myself... and I have purty good aim with nooky, not so good
with cranny

Sheldon

In article >,
"Nancy Young" > wrote:

> Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
> out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
> a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
>
> Just sayin.
>
> nancy
>
>

I just slice 'em like a bagel...... :-)
--
Om.

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch." -Jack Nicholson

OmManiPadmeOmelet wrote:
> In article >,
> "Nancy Young" > wrote:
>
> > Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
> > out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
> > a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
> >
> > Just sayin.
> >
> > nancy
> >
> >
>
> I just slice 'em like a bagel...... :-)

I suppose you don't get your nooky and cranny buttered too often.

In article .com>,
"Sheldon" > wrote:

> OmManiPadmeOmelet wrote:
> > In article >,
> > "Nancy Young" > wrote:
> >
> > > Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
> > > out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
> > > a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
> > >
> > > Just sayin.
> > >
> > > nancy
> > >
> > >
> >
> > I just slice 'em like a bagel...... :-)
>
> I suppose you don't get your nooky and cranny buttered too often.
>

No more than yours......
--
Om.

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch." -Jack Nicholson

OmManiPadmeOmelet wrote:
> In article .com>,
> "Sheldon" > wrote:
>
> > OmManiPadmeOmelet wrote:
> > > In article >,
> > > "Nancy Young" > wrote:
> > >
> > > > Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
> > > > out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
> > > > a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
> > > >
> > > > Just sayin.
> > > >
> > > > nancy
> > > >
> > > >
> > >
> > > I just slice 'em like a bagel...... :-)
> >
> > I suppose you don't get your nooky and cranny buttered too often.
> >
>
> No more than yours......

Mine has no nooky, or cranny.... but drawn butter, enough to drown you!
hehe

In article .com>,
"Sheldon" > wrote:

> OmManiPadmeOmelet wrote:
> > In article .com>,
> > "Sheldon" > wrote:
> >
> > > OmManiPadmeOmelet wrote:
> > > > In article >,
> > > > "Nancy Young" > wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
> > > > > out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
> > > > > a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
> > > > >
> > > > > Just sayin.
> > > > >
> > > > > nancy
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > >
> > > > I just slice 'em like a bagel...... :-)
> > >
> > > I suppose you don't get your nooky and cranny buttered too often.
> > >
> >
> > No more than yours......
>
> Mine has no nooky, or cranny.... but drawn butter, enough to drown you!
> hehe
>

In your dreams babycakes....... ;-D
--
Om.

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch." -Jack Nicholson

_.-In rec.food.cooking, Nancy Young wrote the following -._
> Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
> out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
> a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?

Then they would look fake and people wouldn't buy them. Sometimes
defects are intentional because they add character or the appearance
of authenticity.

What gets me is that 'they' have many flavors out there including
light and whole grain kinds but even these have high fructose corn
syrup. Can I get healthy muffins without the HFCS. Is that too much
to ask?

--
.-')) fauxascii.com ('-. | It's a damn poor mind that
' ..- .:" ) ( ":. -.. ' | can only think of one way to
((,,_;'.;' UIN=66618055 ';. ';_,,)) | spell a word.
((_.YIM=Faux_Pseudo :._)) | - Andrew Jackson

Faux_Pseudo wrote:
> _.-In rec.food.cooking, Nancy Young wrote the following -._
> > Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
> > out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
> > a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
>
> Then they would look fake and people wouldn't buy them. Sometimes
> defects are intentional because they add character or the appearance
> of authenticity.
>
> What gets me is that 'they' have many flavors out there including
> light and whole grain kinds but even these have high fructose corn
> syrup. Can I get healthy muffins without the HFCS. Is that too much
> to ask?

Make your own? It is surprisingly easy (well I was surprised). IIRC
the Joy of Cooking has a good recipe.
John Kane, Kingston ON Canada

wrote:

> Make your own? It is surprisingly easy (well I was surprised). IIRC
> the Joy of Cooking has a good recipe.
> John Kane, Kingston ON Canada
>

Here is the recipe for English Muffin Loaf that I've made for years. I
do the microwave version, and while it looks a tad anemic at first, once
sliced and toasted it is delicious.

> * Exported from MasterCook *
>
> English Muffin Loaf
>
> Recipe By : Fleishmann's Yeast Co.
> Serving Size : 1 Preparation Time :0:00
> Categories : Breads
>
> Amount Measure Ingredient -- Preparation Method
> -------- ------------ --------------------------------
> 6 cups unsifted flour
> 2 packages active dry yeast
> 1 tablespoon sugar
> 2 teaspoons salt
> 1/4 teaspoon baking soda
> 2 cups milk
> 1/2 cup water
> cornmeal
>
> Combine 3 cups flour, yeast, sugar, salt and baking soda. Heat milk and water until very warm. Add to dry ingredients and beat well. Stir in the remaining 3 cups of flour to make a stiff batter. Spoon into 2 loaf pans that have been greased and sprinkled with cornmeal. Sprinkle tops with cornmeal. Cover: let rise in a warm place, free from draft, for 45 min.
> Bake at 400 for 25 min. Remove from pans and cool.
>
> To make in Microwave:
> prepare as directed except reduce the white flour by 1 cup when stirring in the second addition of flour to make a stiff batter. Spoon batter into two loaf dishes that are greased and sprinkled with cornmeal. Rise as direceted.
> Microwave each loaf on high for 6 min 30 seconds. Allow to rest for 5 min before removing from pans.
>
> To serve slice and toast:
>

"Nancy Young" > wrote in news:dqljih$nt2$1
@news.monmouth.com:

> Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
> out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
> a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
>
> Just sayin.
>
> nancy


nancy,

Write them. It's mad science. Has been for decades.



ANdy

"Andy" <q> wrote

> "Nancy Young" > wrote

>> Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
>> out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
>> a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?

> Write them. It's mad science. Has been for decades.
>
>

(laugh) But then what kind of nonsense could I amuse myself
with? I need lopsided breakfast bread.

nancy

In article >,
"Nancy Young" > wrote:

> "Andy" <q> wrote
>
> > "Nancy Young" > wrote
>
> >> Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
> >> out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
> >> a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
>
> > Write them. It's mad science. Has been for decades.
> >
> >
>
> (laugh) But then what kind of nonsense could I amuse myself
> with? I need lopsided breakfast bread.
>
> nancy
>
>

But generally when you send complaints to a company, they send you
coupons...... ;-)

Got some free cat food that way! <lol>
--
Om.

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch." -Jack Nicholson

OmManiPadmeOmelet wrote:
> In article >,
> "Nancy Young" > wrote:
>
> > "Andy" <q> wrote
> >
> > > "Nancy Young" > wrote
> >
> > >> Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
> > >> out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
> > >> a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
> >
> > > Write them. It's mad science. Has been for decades.
> > >
> > >
> >
> > (laugh) But then what kind of nonsense could I amuse myself
> > with? I need lopsided breakfast bread.
> >
> > nancy
> >
> >
>
> But generally when you send complaints to a company, they send you
> coupons...... ;-)
>
> Got some free cat food that way! <lol>

Generally when you give a product compliments you get twice as many
coupons.

Sheldon wrote:
> OmManiPadmeOmelet wrote:
>
>>In article >,
>> "Nancy Young" > wrote:
>>
>>
>>>"Andy" <q> wrote
>>>
>>>
>>>>"Nancy Young" > wrote
>>>
>>>>>Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
>>>>>out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
>>>>>a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
>>>
>>>>Write them. It's mad science. Has been for decades.
>>>>
>>>>
>>>
>>>(laugh) But then what kind of nonsense could I amuse myself
>>>with? I need lopsided breakfast bread.
>>>
>>>nancy
>>>
>>>
>>
>>But generally when you send complaints to a company, they send you
>>coupons...... ;-)
>>
>>Got some free cat food that way! <lol>
>
>
> Generally when you give a product compliments you get twice as many
> coupons.
>

hey, you oculd try both and get lots of coupons

--

saerah

http://anisaerah.blogspot.com/

"Peace is not an absence of war, it is a virtue, a state of mind, a
disposition for benevolence, confidence, justice."
-Baruch Spinoza

"There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly
what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear
and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There
is another theory which states that this has already happened."
-Douglas Adams

In article .com>,
"Sheldon" > wrote:

> OmManiPadmeOmelet wrote:
> > In article >,
> > "Nancy Young" > wrote:
> >
> > > "Andy" <q> wrote
> > >
> > > > "Nancy Young" > wrote
> > >
> > > >> Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
> > > >> out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
> > > >> a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
> > >
> > > > Write them. It's mad science. Has been for decades.
> > > >
> > > >
> > >
> > > (laugh) But then what kind of nonsense could I amuse myself
> > > with? I need lopsided breakfast bread.
> > >
> > > nancy
> > >
> > >
> >
> > But generally when you send complaints to a company, they send you
> > coupons...... ;-)
> >
> > Got some free cat food that way! <lol>
>
> Generally when you give a product compliments you get twice as many
> coupons.
>

Hmmmmm... Might have to try that.

Orchid was dying. Granted, she is 16 years old but 1/2 siamese.
Three trips to the vet, no joy. Gave her Pen' injections as needed but
she still ended up a snotty nose fur covered skeleton. :-( This started
about a year ago.

We generally feed Purina dry food and Friskies canned since they like
it. Most of the cats are healthy, a couple are fat.

Orchid has a passion for Tuna, so I started offering her 9 lives "tuna
select". A dark tuna with egg bits, and protected her from the other
cats when she ate so she could eat all she wanted.

Over the past couple of months, she has improved and is actually putting
on weight! :-) She is now strong enough again to jump up into her
"protected" feeding area, and is getting the strength to meow again. She
was so weak, she had lost her voice.

Even her backbone is nearly covered again. Her mother lived to be nearly
19 so maybe she will make it to that age now. Her sister, Athena, does
not even look geriatric and is still going strong.

Appears that 9 lives canned is far superior to Friskies. We will
probably be switching the entire gang over to it now.

If I tell this story to 9 lives, think they will send me coupons???? ;-)
--
Om.

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch." -Jack Nicholson

Nancy Young wrote:
> "Andy" <q> wrote
>
>>"Nancy Young" > wrote
>
>>>Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
>>>out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
>>>a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
>
>>Write them. It's mad science. Has been for decades.
>>
>
> (laugh) But then what kind of nonsense could I amuse myself
> with? I need lopsided breakfast bread.

If you make your own, you could cut them vertically and just imagine how
much fun that would be. A column I wrote back in the last century about
them. And a variant that's utterly decadent. Enjoy.

Pastorio
-----------------------------
English muffins explained
I never had an English muffin in England. At least, not one I
recognized. I did have crumpets, though and they seemed like distant
cousins to what I had had in this country. I liked theirs better.
Think about this for a minute. What is bread like when it’s been in a
package for a week or more? Right. At least starting to get stale, what
with all the magical chemistry going on inside the plastic wrap. Same
for the muffins. They are not, how you say, at the peak of flavor and
texture.
English muffins are a kind of yeast bread and they should prove to be
fairly easy. There are two distinct techniques for shaping English
muffins. Take your choice. And we’ll look at a variation that produces
the most luxuriously sensuous texture you’ve ever seen in a baked product.
And we’ll see about crumpets. What are crumpets, anyway? We’ll see
that, too.
To bake them, you’ll need a griddle and I prefer cast iron. Even heat
is the most important question and however you get there is fine.
We’re going to make a sponge and let it rise until it collapses by
itself. Whoa, Bob. How about a little explanation of the technical
terms? Right. Mix everything together holding back part of the flour so
that the resulting batter is thickly liquid. That’s a sponge. While it
rises, big bubbles form and it looks like, all together now, a sponge.
You thought this was going to be hard.
Since it’s thinner than the usual bread dough, it will rise for a while
and then simply collapse under its own weight. Then we’ll put the rest
of the flour in. In answer to the question of that fellow over there, I
don’t know if it can be started in a bread machine.
ENGLISH MUFFINS
Makes about a dozen 4-inch or a dozen and a half 3-inch muffins
1/8 cup warm water to dissolve yeast (105 - 120 degrees)
1 packet dry yeast (or equivalent in other forms)
1 cup water, room temperature
1/2 cup scalded milk, cooled to about 120 degrees
1 tablespoon sugar
1 teaspoon salt
4 cups all-purpose flour
3 tablespoons butter at room temp
extra flour or cornmeal
extra butter
In a bowl large enough to handle the risen dough (maybe 4 quarts or so),
combine water and yeast, stir and let dissolve for a couple minutes. Add
water, milk, sugar and salt to yeast. Gradually add half of the flour
and mix well. Cover and put aside until the sponge has risen and
collapsed, at least an hour and up to two hours. Mix in the soft butter
then add the rest of the flour and mix in well. Here’s where the two
different methods of shaping the muffins comes in.
Shaping with rings: Muffin rings (or flan rings or tuna fish cans or
cat food cans or whatever) or any other kind of metal rings have been
traditional in shaping the muffins. They’re metal rings about two inches
tall and look like cans with both ends open. Grease the rings and put
them on prepared cookie sheets for the final rising. The cookie sheets
may be greased or floured or have a thin layer of corn meal on them to
keep the muffin dough from sticking. Put rounds of dough in them that
fit snugly against the sides from 1/2 to 3/4 inch deep. Let them rise
until they’re doubled.
Shaping without rings: On a floured board, shape the dough into a sheet
about 1/2 inch deep. Use a well-floured rolling pin and work gently. Cut
the dough into 3- or 4-inch circles and put on prepared cookie sheets to
rise until doubled.
To bake the muffins: When the muffins are fully risen, heat a buttered
griddle until hot but not smoking. Gently slide a spatula under the
muffins and put them on the griddle. Remove the rings. Turn muffins once
after the first side is a light-medium brown. That’s it.
*The impossibly smooth variant is, of course, based on fat. I sometimes
make English Muffins using cream instead of the water and milk called
for in the recipe. When you toast and eat them, they don’t need butter.*
Split the muffins for toasting with a scallop-bladed knife or use two
forks back to back. The former gives you nice even surfaces to butter
(or jelly). The latter gives you the famous "nooks and crannies" of
advertising fame a few years back. Your call.
Crumpets are like English muffins except they’re different. To the
above recipe, add another cup of milk at the beginning, maybe a cup and
1/8 to get a more liquid batter. You have to use the rings because the
dough will be more loose. Otherwise, it’s the same technique. The
texture of the crumpets will be denser and the crumb will be smaller and
more elegant. Marmalade seems to be made for crumpets.

"Bob (this one)" > wrote in message
...
> Nancy Young wrote:
> > "Andy" <q> wrote
> >
> >>"Nancy Young" > wrote
> >
> >>>Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
> >>>out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
> >>>a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
> >
> >>Write them. It's mad science. Has been for decades.
> >>
> >
> > (laugh) But then what kind of nonsense could I amuse myself
> > with? I need lopsided breakfast bread.
>
> If you make your own, you could cut them vertically and just imagine how
> much fun that would be. A column I wrote back in the last century about
> them. And a variant that's utterly decadent. Enjoy.
>
> Pastorio
> -----------------------------
> English muffins explained
> I never had an English muffin in England. At least, not one I
> recognized. I did have crumpets, though and they seemed like distant
> cousins to what I had had in this country. I liked theirs better.
> Think about this for a minute. What is bread like when it’s been in a
> package for a week or more? Right. At least starting to get stale, what
> with all the magical chemistry going on inside the plastic wrap. Same
> for the muffins. They are not, how you say, at the peak of flavor and
> texture.
> English muffins are a kind of yeast bread and they should prove to be
> fairly easy. There are two distinct techniques for shaping English
> muffins. Take your choice. And we’ll look at a variation that produces
> the most luxuriously sensuous texture you’ve ever seen in a baked product.
> And we’ll see about crumpets. What are crumpets, anyway? We’ll see
> that, too.
> To bake them, you’ll need a griddle and I prefer cast iron. Even heat
> is the most important question and however you get there is fine.
> We’re going to make a sponge and let it rise until it collapses by
> itself. Whoa, Bob. How about a little explanation of the technical
> terms? Right. Mix everything together holding back part of the flour so
> that the resulting batter is thickly liquid. That’s a sponge. While it
> rises, big bubbles form and it looks like, all together now, a sponge.
> You thought this was going to be hard.
> Since it’s thinner than the usual bread dough, it will rise for a while
> and then simply collapse under its own weight. Then we’ll put the rest
> of the flour in. In answer to the question of that fellow over there, I
> don’t know if it can be started in a bread machine.
> ENGLISH MUFFINS
> Makes about a dozen 4-inch or a dozen and a half 3-inch muffins
> 1/8 cup warm water to dissolve yeast (105 - 120 degrees)
> 1 packet dry yeast (or equivalent in other forms)
> 1 cup water, room temperature
> 1/2 cup scalded milk, cooled to about 120 degrees
> 1 tablespoon sugar
> 1 teaspoon salt
> 4 cups all-purpose flour
> 3 tablespoons butter at room temp
> extra flour or cornmeal
> extra butter
> In a bowl large enough to handle the risen dough (maybe 4 quarts or so),
> combine water and yeast, stir and let dissolve for a couple minutes. Add
> water, milk, sugar and salt to yeast. Gradually add half of the flour
> and mix well. Cover and put aside until the sponge has risen and
> collapsed, at least an hour and up to two hours. Mix in the soft butter
> then add the rest of the flour and mix in well. Here’s where the two
> different methods of shaping the muffins comes in.
> Shaping with rings: Muffin rings (or flan rings or tuna fish cans or
> cat food cans or whatever) or any other kind of metal rings have been
> traditional in shaping the muffins. They’re metal rings about two inches
> tall and look like cans with both ends open. Grease the rings and put
> them on prepared cookie sheets for the final rising. The cookie sheets
> may be greased or floured or have a thin layer of corn meal on them to
> keep the muffin dough from sticking. Put rounds of dough in them that
> fit snugly against the sides from 1/2 to 3/4 inch deep. Let them rise
> until they’re doubled.
> Shaping without rings: On a floured board, shape the dough into a sheet
> about 1/2 inch deep. Use a well-floured rolling pin and work gently. Cut
> the dough into 3- or 4-inch circles and put on prepared cookie sheets to
> rise until doubled.
> To bake the muffins: When the muffins are fully risen, heat a buttered
> griddle until hot but not smoking. Gently slide a spatula under the
> muffins and put them on the griddle. Remove the rings. Turn muffins once
> after the first side is a light-medium brown. That’s it.
> *The impossibly smooth variant is, of course, based on fat. I sometimes
> make English Muffins using cream instead of the water and milk called
> for in the recipe. When you toast and eat them, they don’t need butter.*
> Split the muffins for toasting with a scallop-bladed knife or use two
> forks back to back. The former gives you nice even surfaces to butter
> (or jelly). The latter gives you the famous "nooks and crannies" of
> advertising fame a few years back. Your call.
> Crumpets are like English muffins except they’re different. To the
> above recipe, add another cup of milk at the beginning, maybe a cup and
> 1/8 to get a more liquid batter. You have to use the rings because the
> dough will be more loose. Otherwise, it’s the same technique. The
> texture of the crumpets will be denser and the crumb will be smaller and
> more elegant. Marmalade seems to be made for crumpets.

Crumpets - you mean the round things with kinda, open at the top vertical
tubular holes running right through, right? Kinda somewhat rubbery/elastic
texture in the middle? That's what we call crumpets. If they are thinner and
square, called pieklets (sp?!?) by some here. Marmalade would be sacrilege
on those! Toast them (no one slices these things BTW!) butter, and heaps of
it. You want it to start oozing out, dripping out of the crusty base, then a
nice slice of cheese on top before it cools, so it wilts a little, would go
well. I'd dust mine with powdered chiles too, of course.

Hmmmm, crumpet...


Shaun aRe - Marmalade, pah, heheheheh...

"Shaun aRe" > wrote

> Crumpets - you mean the round things with kinda, open at the top vertical
> tubular holes running right through, right? Kinda somewhat rubbery/elastic
> texture in the middle? That's what we call crumpets. If they are thinner
> and
> square, called pieklets (sp?!?) by some here.

Are you talking about a bialy?

nancy

"Nancy Young" > wrote in message
...
>
> "Andy" <q> wrote
>
> > "Nancy Young" > wrote
>
> >> Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
> >> out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
> >> a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
>
> > Write them. It's mad science. Has been for decades.
> >
> >
>
> (laugh) But then what kind of nonsense could I amuse myself
> with? I need lopsided breakfast bread.

Muffins are bread now, right, heheheheh...


Shaun aRe

"Shaun aRe" > wrote

> Muffins are bread now, right, heheheheh...

Here ya go, brit boy.

http://thomas.gwbakeries.com/history.cfm

"Nancy Young" > wrote in message
...
>
> "Shaun aRe" > wrote
>
> > Muffins are bread now, right, heheheheh...
>
> Here ya go, brit boy.
>
> http://thomas.gwbakeries.com/history.cfm

Eee, where's the humour gone from Usenet?!? Heheheh...


Shaun aRe

In article >,
"Nancy Young" > wrote:

> Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
> out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
> a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?

This may be sacrilege to english muffin purists, but I eat english
muffins several times a week and I have learned that the only way to
split them evenly is to slice them with a serrated knife.

Stan Horwitz wrote:
> In article >,
> "Nancy Young" > wrote:
>
>
>>Seems to me after all this time they'd have figured
>>out a way to fork split them so that the halves are just
>>a teensy bit more even, not like 70/30?
>
>
> This may be sacrilege to english muffin purists, but I eat english
> muffins several times a week and I have learned that the only way to
> split them evenly is to slice them with a serrated knife.


Oh, Stan, How could you? You will be burned at the stake, I am
afraid. How terrible. You used a Serrated Knife, no less. Poor,
poor you.

I am drinking my fourth and last cup of breakfast coffee, black,
strong and hot and eating a toasted English Muffin with cream cheese
and Cherry Amaretto Jam. Before toasting it, I carefully pulled apart
the two halves of the muffin, which resulted in one large half in my
right hand and a mess of crumbs in my left one. (Not all halves are
created equal.) The jam, made and given to me by a dear friend, made
up for all the crumbs, which I ate with a spoon, without toasting
them. (

when did you first notice this?

http://www.iamfood.com/