A Texas preacher*leaned forward in the pulpit, his face red with anger.
"Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku
Klux Klan.**

It is a horrible lie and one which a Christian community cannot
tolerate. *I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. *Now, I
want the party who did this to stand and ask forgiveness from God and
this Christian family."

No one moved.

The preacher continued, "Do you have the nerve to face me and admit this
is a falsehood? *Remember, you will be forgiven, and in your heart you
will feel glory.* Now stand and confess your transgression."
*
Again all was quiet.

Then, slowly, a drop-dead gorgeous blonde with a body that would stop
traffic rose from the third pew. *Her head was bowed and her voice
quivered. *

"Reverend, there has been a terrible misunderstanding.* I never said you
were a member of the Ku Klux Klan. *I simply told a couple of my friends
that you were a wizard under the sheets."
--
Peace, Om.

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch." -Jack Nicholson

OmManiPadmeOmelet wrote:

> "Reverend, there has been a terrible misunderstanding. I never said you
> were a member of the Ku Klux Klan. I simply told a couple of my friends
> that you were a wizard under the sheets."

lol

A preacher gets up on sunday morning starts preching

"sin and iniquity tell it all! tell it all!

a man stands up and says, brother..I've been cheating on my wife
preacher says

"it's alright son, God forgives you, you're being honest with the Lord"

he keep right on preaching

"sin and iniquity tell it all! tell it all!
a woman stand up and proclaims her unfaithfulness to her husband,
he tells her God forgives her...

"sin and iniquity tell it all! tell it all!
"sin and iniquity tell it all! tell it all!

a man stands up and says preacher! last night, i made love to a dog!

the preacher says, "brother i don't believe I would have told that"

In article >,
"Doug Kanter" > wrote:

> A slug makes its way into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says "I
> don't even allow dogs in here, much less slimy things like you. No drink.
> Get out". The slug argues, annoys other patrons, and leaves a slime trail
> all over the bar. Finally, the bartender slips a coaster under the slug,
> takes him outside, and flings him into the bushes.
>
> Three months later, the slug reappears on the bar and asks the bartender
> "Hey! What the hell did you do THAT for???"
>
>

<snork>
--
Peace, Om.

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch." -Jack Nicholson

On Fri, 10 Mar 2006 15:41:28 GMT, Doug Kanter wrote:

> A slug makes its way into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says "I
> don't even allow dogs in here, much less slimy things like you. No drink.
> Get out". The slug argues, annoys other patrons, and leaves a slime trail
> all over the bar. Finally, the bartender slips a coaster under the slug,
> takes him outside, and flings him into the bushes.
>
> Three months later, the slug reappears on the bar and asks the bartender
> "Hey! What the hell did you do THAT for???"


LOLOLOL! I have a friend that I trade "animal in a bar" jokes with.
This one is going straight to him.
--

Practice safe eating. Always use condiments.

In article >,
sf > wrote:

> On Fri, 10 Mar 2006 15:41:28 GMT, Doug Kanter wrote:
>
> > A slug makes its way into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says "I
> > don't even allow dogs in here, much less slimy things like you. No drink.
> > Get out". The slug argues, annoys other patrons, and leaves a slime trail
> > all over the bar. Finally, the bartender slips a coaster under the slug,
> > takes him outside, and flings him into the bushes.
> >
> > Three months later, the slug reappears on the bar and asks the bartender
> > "Hey! What the hell did you do THAT for???"
>
>
> LOLOLOL! I have a friend that I trade "animal in a bar" jokes with.
> This one is going straight to him.

Hey I like those too! :-)
--
Peace, Om.

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch." -Jack Nicholson