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Default Beans and Gas--It's Official

The South Africa Advertising Standards Authority has ruled that eating
beans leads to intestinal gas, the NY Times reported today. In
official phraseology, they said it was "objectively determinable
factual reality" that people who eat beans pass gas.

Bean producers had complained about an ad that made fun of them, but
the Authority said the ad was okay because it was based on "objectively
determinable....."

Neither the story nor, presumably, the Advertising Standards Authority
made any mention of Beano. -aem

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On 12 Apr 2006 11:40:22 -0700, aem wrote:

> The South Africa Advertising Standards Authority has ruled that eating
> beans leads to intestinal gas, the NY Times reported today. In
> official phraseology, they said it was "objectively determinable
> factual reality" that people who eat beans pass gas.
>
> Bean producers had complained about an ad that made fun of them, but
> the Authority said the ad was okay because it was based on "objectively
> determinable....."
>
> Neither the story nor, presumably, the Advertising Standards Authority
> made any mention of Beano. -aem


Well, Beano is missing a good advertising campaign if they don't jump
on that bandwagon.
--

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Default Beans and Gas--It's Official

Ah the memories of my father's favorite ditty:

"Beans, beans the musical fruit."
The more you eat, the more you toot.
The more you toot, the better you feel.
Beans, beans at every meal."


or

Beans, beans good for your heart,
The more you eat, the more you fart,
The more you fart, the better you feel,
Beans, beans at every meal.


Maybe that could be the background music to the ad campaign.
-Ginny


Not to be out done by my father's musical prowess, this was another of
his 'favorites' :

Daddy drunk, baby sober
Baby farts, knocks Daddy over.

Needless to say, he liked his home brew and always had a few in him
when he started singing.
=g

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sf wrote:
> On 12 Apr 2006 11:40:22 -0700, aem wrote:
>
> > The South Africa Advertising Standards Authority has ruled that eating
> > beans leads to intestinal gas, the NY Times reported today. In
> > official phraseology, they said it was "objectively determinable
> > factual reality" that people who eat beans pass gas.
> >
> > Bean producers had complained about an ad that made fun of them, but
> > the Authority said the ad was okay because it was based on "objectively
> > determinable....."
> >
> > Neither the story nor, presumably, the Advertising Standards Authority
> > made any mention of Beano. -aem

>
> Well, Beano is missing a good advertising campaign if they don't jump
> on that bandwagon.
> --
>

I thought of a good ad campaign. It features people in situations
where a smelly fart would really ******** things up. Like a first
date, or being introduced to the president of the company, or many
other occasions. You do the set up, then comes the fart noise, then
the looks of grossed outedness on the faces, then the jingle, "Aw-oh,
he shoulda used Beano."
Kind of like those Southwest commercials, "Want to get away?"

Thing is, most stations would refuse to run a commercial with a fart
noise.

--Bryan

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Default Beans and Gas--It's Official


"Food Snob" > wrote in message
ups.com...
> I thought of a good ad campaign. It features people in situations
> where a smelly fart would really ******** things up. Like a first
> date, or being introduced to the president of the company, or many
> other occasions. You do the set up, then comes the fart noise, then
> the looks of grossed outedness on the faces, then the jingle, "Aw-oh,
> he shoulda used Beano."
> Kind of like those Southwest commercials, "Want to get away?"
>
> Thing is, most stations would refuse to run a commercial with a fart
> noise.


Yeah, that must be a real problem for Beano's ad agency. It's
one of those products (like, say, toilet paper) where you can't
QUITE mention what it actually does or is used for.

Which, in most of these cases, is probably a good thing
in the long run...:-)

Bob M.




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Default Beans and Gas--It's Official

On 13 Apr 2006 08:37:23 -0700, Food Snob wrote:

>
> sf wrote:
> >
> > Well, Beano is missing a good advertising campaign if they don't jump
> > on that bandwagon.
> > --
> >

> I thought of a good ad campaign. It features people in situations
> where a smelly fart would really ******** things up. Like a first
> date, or being introduced to the president of the company, or many
> other occasions. You do the set up, then comes the fart noise, then
> the looks of grossed outedness on the faces, then the jingle, "Aw-oh,
> he shoulda used Beano."
> Kind of like those Southwest commercials, "Want to get away?"
>
> Thing is, most stations would refuse to run a commercial with a fart
> noise.
>

Hmmmm. I'm picturing a church wedding scene. They wouldn't *have* to
include the noise, just do close-ups on faces of people whose space
has just been invaded by the odor. Think: SBD (silent, but deadly).
It would make better TV anyway... unless subtle is completely lost on
the buying public today.

Fart noises could be part of their radio advertising campaign,
however.



--

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Default Beans and Gas--It's Official


Food Snob wrote:
> sf wrote:
> > On 12 Apr 2006 11:40:22 -0700, aem wrote:
> >
> > > The South Africa Advertising Standards Authority has ruled that eating
> > > beans leads to intestinal gas, the NY Times reported today. In
> > > official phraseology, they said it was "objectively determinable
> > > factual reality" that people who eat beans pass gas.
> > >
> > > Bean producers had complained about an ad that made fun of them, but
> > > the Authority said the ad was okay because it was based on "objectively
> > > determinable....."
> > >
> > > Neither the story nor, presumably, the Advertising Standards Authority
> > > made any mention of Beano. -aem

> >
> > Well, Beano is missing a good advertising campaign if they don't jump
> > on that bandwagon.
> > --
> >

> I thought of a good ad campaign. It features people in situations
> where a smelly fart would really ******** things up. Like a first
> date, or being introduced to the president of the company, or many
> other occasions. You do the set up, then comes the fart noise, then
> the looks of grossed outedness on the faces, then the jingle, "Aw-oh,
> he shoulda used Beano."
> Kind of like those Southwest commercials, "Want to get away?"
>
> Thing is, most stations would refuse to run a commercial with a fart
> noise.
>
> --Bryan


The ad to which the bean producers in South Africa objected showed a
rugby team refusing to enter a locker room where one of the players was
eating beans. -aem

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Default Beans and Gas--It's Official

aem wrote:

>
> The ad to which the bean producers in South Africa objected showed a
> rugby team refusing to enter a locker room where one of the players was
> eating beans. -aem
>

Um, got a URL there please?

--
Cheers
Cathy(xyz)
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> > --
> >

> I thought of a good ad campaign. It features people in situations
> where a smelly fart would really ******** things up. Like a first
> date, or being introduced to the president of the company, or many
> other occasions. You do the set up, then comes the fart noise, then
> the looks of grossed outedness on the faces, then the jingle, "Aw-oh,
> he shoulda used Beano."
> Kind of like those Southwest commercials, "Want to get away?"
>
> Thing is, most stations would refuse to run a commercial with a fart
> noise.
>
> --Bryan


I did see that type of commercial on TV but I can't recall the product. What
I remember is the guy opens the passenger door for his girl to get in,
closes it and walks around to his side, opens the door and.....presumably
the girl farted in the meantime...he gets a whiff and reacts. I wish I could
remember more.
--
Lefty

Life is for learning
The worst I ever had was wonderful
>



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cathyxyz wrote:
> aem wrote:
>
> >
> > The ad to which the bean producers in South Africa objected showed a
> > rugby team refusing to enter a locker room where one of the players was
> > eating beans. -aem
> >

> Um, got a URL there please?
>

No, it was just a brief item in the NYT yesterday. Originally from
Reuters, I believe. -aem



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"aem" > wrote

> cathyxyz wrote:
>> aem wrote:
>>
>> >
>> > The ad to which the bean producers in South Africa objected showed a
>> > rugby team refusing to enter a locker room where one of the players was
>> > eating beans. -aem
>> >

>> Um, got a URL there please?
>>

> No, it was just a brief item in the NYT yesterday. Originally from
> Reuters, I believe. -aem


http://news.scotsman.com/latest.cfm?id=560882006


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aem wrote:
> cathyxyz wrote:
>> aem wrote:
>>
>>> The ad to which the bean producers in South Africa objected showed a
>>> rugby team refusing to enter a locker room where one of the players was
>>> eating beans. -aem
>>>

>> Um, got a URL there please?
>>

> No, it was just a brief item in the NYT yesterday. Originally from
> Reuters, I believe. -aem
>

Heh heh heh found this on Reuters

"A TV advert for sweet onions showed a rugby player eating beans that
made him smell "stinky." The advert claims that "with sweet onions there
are no tears, no burn and definitely no stink."


I have yet to see the famous "TV advert", but then again, I am no "ad
fanatic" Thanks for the chuckle.

--
Cheers
Cathy(xyz)
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"Food Snob" > wrote

> Thing is, most stations would refuse to run a commercial with a fart
> noise.


Too bad they won't refuse to run ads with ringing phones and
doorbells, that's an idea I can get behind (harrrr).

nancy


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On 13 Apr 2006 08:37:23 -0700, "Food Snob" > wrote:

>I thought of a good ad campaign. It features people in situations
>where a smelly fart would really ******** things up. Like a first
>date, or being introduced to the president of the company, or many
>other occasions. You do the set up, then comes the fart noise, then
>the looks of grossed outedness on the faces, then the jingle, "Aw-oh,
>he shoulda used Beano."
>Kind of like those Southwest commercials, "Want to get away?"
>
>Thing is, most stations would refuse to run a commercial with a fart
>noise.


I'd really love to see an ad with a bunch of schoolkids (maybe a
school choir) singing the 'beans, beans, good for your heart...' song
- to advertise baked beans. It could be like one of those Marmite ads
in the UK that slags off the product it's trying to sell in an ironic
manner...

We all know that beans make you fart - so why not use that as a
selling point? Farting is pretty ****ing funny after all - in fact
some people *love* to fart.

--
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Dav wrote:
> On 13 Apr 2006 08:37:23 -0700, "Food Snob" > wrote:
>
> >I thought of a good ad campaign. It features people in situations
> >where a smelly fart would really ******** things up. Like a first
> >date, or being introduced to the president of the company, or many
> >other occasions. You do the set up, then comes the fart noise, then
> >the looks of grossed outedness on the faces, then the jingle, "Aw-oh,
> >he shoulda used Beano."
> >Kind of like those Southwest commercials, "Want to get away?"
> >
> >Thing is, most stations would refuse to run a commercial with a fart
> >noise.

>
> I'd really love to see an ad with a bunch of schoolkids (maybe a
> school choir) singing the 'beans, beans, good for your heart...' song
> - to advertise baked beans. It could be like one of those Marmite ads
> in the UK that slags off the product it's trying to sell in an ironic
> manner...
>
> We all know that beans make you fart - so why not use that as a
> selling point? Farting is pretty ****ing funny after all - in fact
> some people *love* to fart.
>

Some people are even into farts sexually. They'd of course be
anti-Beano.

--Bryan



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On 13 Apr 2006 21:24:27 -0700, BOBOBOnoBO® wrote:
> >

> Some people are even into farts sexually. They'd of course be
> anti-Beano.
>

I don't even want to know why you know this.


--
sf
Former Fashion Floozy
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sf wrote:
> On 13 Apr 2006 21:24:27 -0700, BOBOBOnoBO® wrote:
> > >

> > Some people are even into farts sexually. They'd of course be
> > anti-Beano.
> >

> I don't even want to know why you know this.
>

Listen, anything you can conceive of being somebody's fetish, there's
somone out there who is into it.
>
> --
> sf
> Former Fashion Floozy


--Bryan

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aem wrote:
> The South Africa Advertising Standards Authority has ruled that eating
> beans leads to intestinal gas, the NY Times reported today. In
> official phraseology, they said it was "objectively determinable
> factual reality" that people who eat beans pass gas.
>
> Bean producers had complained about an ad that made fun of them, but
> the Authority said the ad was okay because it was based on
> "objectively determinable....."
>
> Neither the story nor, presumably, the Advertising Standards Authority
> made any mention of Beano. -aem


I must be the only person on the planet who doesn't get gas after eating
beans.

Jill


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Default Beans and Gas--It's Official

jmcquown wrote:

>
> > Bean producers had complained about an ad that made fun of them, but
> > the Authority said the ad was okay because it was based on
> > "objectively determinable....."
> >
> > Neither the story nor, presumably, the Advertising Standards Authority
> > made any mention of Beano. -aem

>
> I must be the only person on the planet who doesn't get gas after eating
> beans.


You are lucky. I get it so bad that I prefer to avoid beans. I tried Beano.
I didn't help.

There is a silly old joke about an old guy who went to the doctor and told
him that he suffered from gas but the farts were silent and they didn't
smell. The doctor suggested that he take a nasal decongestant and change the
batteries in his hearing aid.

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On Fri, 14 Apr 2006 15:30:28 -0500, jmcquown wrote:

> aem wrote:
> > The South Africa Advertising Standards Authority has ruled that eating
> > beans leads to intestinal gas, the NY Times reported today. In
> > official phraseology, they said it was "objectively determinable
> > factual reality" that people who eat beans pass gas.
> >
> > Bean producers had complained about an ad that made fun of them, but
> > the Authority said the ad was okay because it was based on
> > "objectively determinable....."
> >
> > Neither the story nor, presumably, the Advertising Standards Authority
> > made any mention of Beano. -aem

>
> I must be the only person on the planet who doesn't get gas after eating
> beans.
>

You probably are. I find that if you dump out the water after beans
come to a boil the first time, there is little to no gas produced
after consumption.

--
sf
Former Fashion Floozy


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"jmcquown" > wrote

> I must be the only person on the planet who doesn't get gas after eating
> beans.


They don't bother me, either, maybe it's my Scottish roots?
(laugh)

nancy


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In article .com>,
says...
>
> Dav wrote:
> > On 13 Apr 2006 08:37:23 -0700, "Food Snob" > wrote:
> >
> > >I thought of a good ad campaign. It features people in situations
> > >where a smelly fart would really ******** things up. Like a first
> > >date, or being introduced to the president of the company, or many
> > >other occasions. You do the set up, then comes the fart noise, then
> > >the looks of grossed outedness on the faces, then the jingle, "Aw-oh,
> > >he shoulda used Beano."
> > >Kind of like those Southwest commercials, "Want to get away?"
> > >
> > >Thing is, most stations would refuse to run a commercial with a fart
> > >noise.

> >
> > I'd really love to see an ad with a bunch of schoolkids (maybe a
> > school choir) singing the 'beans, beans, good for your heart...' song
> > - to advertise baked beans. It could be like one of those Marmite ads
> > in the UK that slags off the product it's trying to sell in an ironic
> > manner...
> >
> > We all know that beans make you fart - so why not use that as a
> > selling point? Farting is pretty ****ing funny after all - in fact
> > some people *love* to fart.
> >

> Some people are even into farts sexually. They'd of course be
> anti-Beano.


Certain foods stir up intestinal gas more than others. So every now and
then a buddy and I would do broc and cheese with beer for lunch. Then in
the afternoon we'd both be stretched out on the dual sofas in the living
room just cranking away.

When his wife got home she literally turned green.

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T wrote:
> In article .com>,
> says...
> >
> > Dav wrote:
> > > On 13 Apr 2006 08:37:23 -0700, "Food Snob" > wrote:
> > >
> > > >I thought of a good ad campaign. It features people in situations
> > > >where a smelly fart would really ******** things up. Like a first
> > > >date, or being introduced to the president of the company, or many
> > > >other occasions. You do the set up, then comes the fart noise, then
> > > >the looks of grossed outedness on the faces, then the jingle, "Aw-oh,
> > > >he shoulda used Beano."
> > > >Kind of like those Southwest commercials, "Want to get away?"
> > > >
> > > >Thing is, most stations would refuse to run a commercial with a fart
> > > >noise.
> > >
> > > I'd really love to see an ad with a bunch of schoolkids (maybe a
> > > school choir) singing the 'beans, beans, good for your heart...' song
> > > - to advertise baked beans. It could be like one of those Marmite ads
> > > in the UK that slags off the product it's trying to sell in an ironic
> > > manner...
> > >
> > > We all know that beans make you fart - so why not use that as a
> > > selling point? Farting is pretty ****ing funny after all - in fact
> > > some people *love* to fart.
> > >

> > Some people are even into farts sexually. They'd of course be
> > anti-Beano.

>
> Certain foods stir up intestinal gas more than others. So every now and
> then a buddy and I would do broc and cheese with beer for lunch. Then in
> the afternoon we'd both be stretched out on the dual sofas in the living
> room just cranking away.
>
> When his wife got home she literally turned green.


Did you enjoy the scent of each other's farts?

--Bryan

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In article .com>,
says...
>
> T wrote:
> > In article .com>,
> >
says...
> > >
> > > Dav wrote:
> > > > On 13 Apr 2006 08:37:23 -0700, "Food Snob" > wrote:
> > > >
> > > > >I thought of a good ad campaign. It features people in situations
> > > > >where a smelly fart would really ******** things up. Like a first
> > > > >date, or being introduced to the president of the company, or many
> > > > >other occasions. You do the set up, then comes the fart noise, then
> > > > >the looks of grossed outedness on the faces, then the jingle, "Aw-oh,
> > > > >he shoulda used Beano."
> > > > >Kind of like those Southwest commercials, "Want to get away?"
> > > > >
> > > > >Thing is, most stations would refuse to run a commercial with a fart
> > > > >noise.
> > > >
> > > > I'd really love to see an ad with a bunch of schoolkids (maybe a
> > > > school choir) singing the 'beans, beans, good for your heart...' song
> > > > - to advertise baked beans. It could be like one of those Marmite ads
> > > > in the UK that slags off the product it's trying to sell in an ironic
> > > > manner...
> > > >
> > > > We all know that beans make you fart - so why not use that as a
> > > > selling point? Farting is pretty ****ing funny after all - in fact
> > > > some people *love* to fart.
> > > >
> > > Some people are even into farts sexually. They'd of course be
> > > anti-Beano.

> >
> > Certain foods stir up intestinal gas more than others. So every now and
> > then a buddy and I would do broc and cheese with beer for lunch. Then in
> > the afternoon we'd both be stretched out on the dual sofas in the living
> > room just cranking away.
> >
> > When his wife got home she literally turned green.

>
> Did you enjoy the scent of each other's farts?
>
> --Bryan
>
>


It was more a competition to see who would gag first.


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Default Beans and Gas--It's Official

Nancy Young wrote:
> "jmcquown" > wrote
>
>> I must be the only person on the planet who doesn't get gas after
>> eating beans.

>
> They don't bother me, either, maybe it's my Scottish roots?
> (laugh)
>
> nancy


Perhaps we Scots are immune to the gas effects of beans!

Jill


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jmcquown wrote:
>
> I must be the only person on the planet who doesn't get gas after eating
> beans.
>
> Jill


I don't either but we eat them a lot. I think that has something to do
with it (good gut flora).
-L.

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T wrote:

>
> Certain foods stir up intestinal gas more than others. So every now and
> then a buddy and I would do broc and cheese with beer for lunch. Then in
> the afternoon we'd both be stretched out on the dual sofas in the living
> room just cranking away.
>
> When his wife got home she literally turned green.


Let's just say, I will never feed our two 50-pound dogs (a brown lab
and a dalmatian) left over chili beans again. They are house dogs.
After my wife caught wind of what I had done, I was in the doghouse.

;-)

Rusty

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On Fri, 14 Apr 2006 21:15:49 -0400, T >
wrote:
>Certain foods stir up intestinal gas more than others. So every now and
>then a buddy and I would do broc and cheese with beer for lunch. Then in
>the afternoon we'd both be stretched out on the dual sofas in the living
>room just cranking away.
>
>When his wife got home she literally turned green.


Cauliflower cheese always gets me bad, for some reason. One time I ate
a huge serving that my nan had made and I was letting off literally
every ten seconds for the rest of the night.

At the other end, if you ever feel the need to burp a lot for kicks
and giggles, I recommend accidentally swallowing a piece of aluminium
foil with your food.

--
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T wrote:

> Certain foods stir up intestinal gas more than others. So every now and
> then a buddy and I would do broc and cheese with beer for lunch. Then in
> the afternoon we'd both be stretched out on the dual sofas in the living
> room just cranking away.
>
> When his wife got home she literally turned green.


If you want to really gross her out, have pickled eggs and beer. You could
send her from the room gasping for breath.




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Default Beans and Gas--It's Official


"jmcquown" > wrote in message
...
> Nancy Young wrote:
>> "jmcquown" > wrote
>>
>>> I must be the only person on the planet who doesn't get gas after
>>> eating beans.

>>
>> They don't bother me, either, maybe it's my Scottish roots?
>> (laugh)
>>
>> nancy

>
> Perhaps we Scots are immune to the gas effects of beans!
>
> Jill
>

I must have Scots blood -- no wind!
Dee Dee


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Default Beans and Gas--It's Official

With me, after eating beans, it's Katie bar the door.

Cheers,
Chuck Kopsho
Oceanside, California

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