We drove 2-1/2 hours northwest to attend the funeral of
WhatshisnamehisnameisJamie's uncle. Nice man. Died too young. Too
young. Damn cigarettes. I wanted to see what kind of Dead Spread the
Baptists put on. At LAST!! Food made by Church Ladies. Hotdish!
Jell-o!! Ham for sandwiches (Wonder Bread slices, not dollar buns).
Pickles. The dessert table was -- uh -- "different." Only my brownies
and an angel food cake were on serving plates; everything else was still
in its pan.

Rest in peace, Tim. Your grandson was blessed to have you for two years
and he's heartbroken.
--
-Barb, Mother Superior, HOSSSPoJ
http://jamlady.eboard.com - Dead Spread, 8-21-06
http://web.mac.com/barbschaller

On Tue, 22 Aug 2006 00:29:06 -0500, Melba's Jammin'
> wrote:

>We drove 2-1/2 hours northwest to attend the funeral of
>WhatshisnamehisnameisJamie's uncle. Nice man. Died too young. Too
>young. Damn cigarettes. I wanted to see what kind of Dead Spread the
>Baptists put on. At LAST!! Food made by Church Ladies. Hotdish!
>Jell-o!! Ham for sandwiches (Wonder Bread slices, not dollar buns).
>Pickles. The dessert table was -- uh -- "different." Only my brownies
>and an angel food cake were on serving plates; everything else was still
>in its pan.

Does it really matter how the desserts were displayed? They were made
or purchased with love.

I usually ignore dead spread threads, feeling that they're
inappropriate, but that's just me. And a few others. You got lucky
this time. I can't sleep. <G>

Carol

My wife (who lived for 9 years in NW Minnesota) calls this sort of
funeral food "death dishes". There are many of them found in church
cookbooks.

T.

Oh pshaw, on Tue 22 Aug 2006 02:58:59a, Michael "Dog3" Lonergan meant to
say...

> Damsel in dis Dress >
> :
>
>>
>> Does it really matter how the desserts were displayed? They were made
>> or purchased with love.
>>
>> I usually ignore dead spread threads, feeling that they're
>> inappropriate, but that's just me. And a few others. You got lucky
>> this time. I can't sleep. <G>
>>
>> Carol
>
> Why do you feel the "dead spread threads" are inappropriate? I don't.

Let's face it...you just like a GOOD PARTY! :-)

Personally, I'm with Carol.

--
Wayne Boatwright
__________________________________________________

Oxymoron: Slow speed.

In article >,
Damsel in dis Dress > wrote:

> On Tue, 22 Aug 2006 00:29:06 -0500, Melba's Jammin'
> > wrote:
>
> >We drove 2-1/2 hours northwest to attend the funeral of
> >WhatshisnamehisnameisJamie's uncle. Nice man. Died too young. Too
> >young. Damn cigarettes. I wanted to see what kind of Dead Spread the
> >Baptists put on. At LAST!! Food made by Church Ladies. Hotdish!
> >Jell-o!! Ham for sandwiches (Wonder Bread slices, not dollar buns).
> >Pickles. The dessert table was -- uh -- "different." Only my brownies
> >and an angel food cake were on serving plates; everything else was still
> >in its pan.
>
> Does it really matter how the desserts were displayed?

It does. :-P How am I going to uphold and protect my reputation as
Dead Spread Critic Weirdo if I doesn't comment on presentation? Really!

> They were made or purchased with love.

Nononono, nothing purchased!! Homemade!! From mixes. That's the same
as homemade, isn't it?

> I usually ignore dead spread threads, feeling that they're
> inappropriate, but that's just me. And a few others. You got lucky
> this time. I can't sleep. <G>
>
> Carol

*I* got lucky? Because you read the post? Oh my. Be still my heart.

--
-Barb, Mother Superior, HOSSSPoJ
http://jamlady.eboard.com
http://web.mac.com/barbschaller

_.-In rec.food.cooking, Melba's Jammin' wrote the following -._
>> Does it really matter how the desserts were displayed?
>
> It does. :-P How am I going to uphold and protect my reputation as
> Dead Spread Critic Weirdo if I doesn't comment on presentation? Really!

After checking the link in your sig I couldn't help but think of a
nice big coffee table book of food for the dead. Recipes and tomb
stones.

While looking at the pictures in the link I was thinking that massive
comfort foods would be at a funeral, not ham sandwiches. Where are
the big ol' pots of stew, the potato dishes or cheese cakes that are
so heavy that one spoonful or slice could cause the folding table to
buckle under the load?

I have photographed 17 of the local cemeteries[0] but I try to
get there after the people have already gone home for the day so all I
find are the fresh flowers and mound of dirt. The last thing most
people need is some guy walking through their moment of need with a
camera, wild hair and a jeans and a T-Shirt. I can only assume that
you are being invited so you have a leg up on me.

[0] http://www.fauxascii.com/photo/cemetery/

--
=()==()==()==()==()- http://fauxascii.com
\ \ \ \ \ \ ASCII artist
:F_P:-O- -O- -O- -O- -O- -O- -O-
\ \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \

"Faux_Pseudo" > wrote in message
news:qDEGg.4671$W01.3178@dukeread08...
> _.-In rec.food.cooking, Melba's Jammin' wrote the following -._
> >> Does it really matter how the desserts were displayed?
> >
> > It does. :-P How am I going to uphold and protect my reputation as
> > Dead Spread Critic Weirdo if I doesn't comment on presentation? Really!
>
> After checking the link in your sig I couldn't help but think of a
> nice big coffee table book of food for the dead. Recipes and tomb
> stones.
>
> While looking at the pictures in the link I was thinking that massive
> comfort foods would be at a funeral, not ham sandwiches. Where are
> the big ol' pots of stew, the potato dishes or cheese cakes that are
> so heavy that one spoonful or slice could cause the folding table to
> buckle under the load?
>
> I have photographed 17 of the local cemeteries[0] but I try to
> get there after the people have already gone home for the day so all I
> find are the fresh flowers and mound of dirt. The last thing most
> people need is some guy walking through their moment of need with a
> camera, wild hair and a jeans and a T-Shirt. I can only assume that
> you are being invited so you have a leg up on me.
>
There are a number of cookbooks that are specialty themed for foods taken to
funerals along with funeral customs that usually accompany them.

Hey, Barb, I was raised Baptist, did they have the raisin pie?
-ginny

"Melba's Jammin'" > wrote in message
...
> We drove 2-1/2 hours northwest to attend the funeral of
> WhatshisnamehisnameisJamie's uncle. Nice man. Died too young. Too
> young. Damn cigarettes. I wanted to see what kind of Dead Spread the
> Baptists put on. At LAST!! Food made by Church Ladies. Hotdish!
> Jell-o!! Ham for sandwiches (Wonder Bread slices, not dollar buns).
> Pickles. The dessert table was -- uh -- "different." Only my brownies
> and an angel food cake were on serving plates; everything else was still
> in its pan.
>
> Rest in peace, Tim. Your grandson was blessed to have you for two years
> and he's heartbroken.
> --
> -Barb, Mother Superior, HOSSSPoJ
> http://jamlady.eboard.com - Dead Spread, 8-21-06
> http://web.mac.com/barbschaller
====================
The Irish American Wakes are the only way to go.
--------------

> It does. :-P How am I going to uphold and protect my reputation as
> Dead Spread Critic Weirdo if I doesn't comment on presentation? Really!

Now imagine if you seriously started to attend " Dead Spreads ", whether
in halls, church basement facilities, or private houses, and while
sampling the food you started handing out cards that identified you
as the food critic for the local newspaper and your beat was
restricted to " Dead Spreads ".

"Damsel in dis Dress" > wrote in message >

> I usually ignore dead spread threads, feeling that they're
> inappropriate, but that's just me. And a few others. You got lucky
> this time. I can't sleep. <G>
>
> Carol

Aw gee, Damsel, viva les dead spreads! My DD#2 insists she wants a buffet
funeral.

Felice

pfoley > wrote in message
. net...

> The Irish American Wakes are the only way to go.

Murphy's in one hand, Guinness in t'other!

The Ranger

Shiver wrote:
> > It does. :-P How am I going to uphold and protect my reputation as
> > Dead Spread Critic Weirdo if I doesn't comment on presentation? Really!
>
> Now imagine if you seriously started to attend " Dead Spreads ", whether
> in halls, church basement facilities, or private houses,


Hey, Chuck Pahlinuik territory.. just like FIGHT CLUB.

T.

In article >,
Shiver > wrote:

> > It does. :-P How am I going to uphold and protect my reputation as
> > Dead Spread Critic Weirdo if I doesn't comment on presentation? Really!
>
> Now imagine if you seriously started to attend " Dead Spreads ", whether
> in halls, church basement facilities, or private houses, and while
> sampling the food you started handing out cards that identified you
> as the food critic for the local newspaper and your beat was
> restricted to " Dead Spreads ".

I'd love it. In the last two years, I've delivered too damn eulogies at
family funerals -- I handed out cards to my nieces and nephews, "Auntie
Barb, Family Euologist Words for the Newly Departed"
--
-Barb, Mother Superior, HOSSSPoJ
http://jamlady.eboard.com
http://web.mac.com/barbschaller

In article <qDEGg.4671$W01.3178@dukeread08>,
Faux_Pseudo > wrote:

> _.-In rec.food.cooking, Melba's Jammin' wrote the following -._
> >> Does it really matter how the desserts were displayed?
> >
> > It does. :-P How am I going to uphold and protect my reputation as
> > Dead Spread Critic Weirdo if I doesn't comment on presentation? Really!
>
> After checking the link in your sig I couldn't help but think of a
> nice big coffee table book of food for the dead. Recipes and tomb
> stones.

I like it. Do we collaborate? You do the rocks and I do the spreads?

> While looking at the pictures in the link I was thinking that massive
> comfort foods would be at a funeral, not ham sandwiches. Where are
> the big ol' pots of stew, the potato dishes or cheese cakes that are
> so heavy that one spoonful or slice could cause the folding table to
> buckle under the load?

Those are things of the past. A sign of the times. I talked to my
pastor (suburban church) yesterday about it and the lack of 'real food'
at the Dead Spreads and he told me how hard it is to get anyone to
volunteer to SERVE the meal much less *prepare and donate* food for it.
I told him I wanted to be on the serving committee. :-) (My photo ops
are about to increase!!)

Working folks don't have time and not much inclination to make time for
such an occasion. I'd hoped that since this was a small town funeral,
things would be different. El Pastor pointed out that farm folk are
busy and maybe couldn't be bothered to do a serving plate thing -- one
more plate or dish to wash. On a more practical note (my own), if the
goods are still left in their baking pans, the donor gets the leftovers
when taking the pan home ‹ and no one on the service committee is
washing baking pans, either. We hope the church will find a use for
the lovely plate my brownies came on (I'm stocked up - it was a
warehouse sale). The newly departed wasn't one of their own, either,
and I kind of wondered if he had been if they'd've gone the extra steps
to fancy things up some. IdaKnow.

> camera, wild hair and a jeans and a T-Shirt. I can only assume that
> you are being invited so you have a leg up on me.

Oh, heck yes. I don't crash strangers' services or plantings. What?
You think I'm weird or something? <looks around suspiciously>

> [0] http://www.fauxascii.com/photo/cemetery/
--
-Barb, Mother Superior, HOSSSPoJ
http://jamlady.eboard.com
http://web.mac.com/barbschaller

In article >,
"Virginia Tadrzynski" > wrote:

> There are a number of cookbooks that are specialty themed for foods taken to
> funerals along with funeral customs that usually accompany them.
>
> Hey, Barb, I was raised Baptist, did they have the raisin pie?
> -ginny

No pies. More cakes than I expected. No unusual bars. Almost had an
Altar Call, though. The pastor had a captive audience. LOL! And we
KNOW that my favorite book on the topic is "Being Dead is No Excuse."
--
-Barb, Mother Superior, HOSSSPoJ
http://jamlady.eboard.com
http://web.mac.com/barbschaller

wrote:
> Shiver wrote:
> > > It does. :-P How am I going to uphold and protect my reputation as
> > > Dead Spread Critic Weirdo if I doesn't comment on presentation? Really!
> >
> > Now imagine if you seriously started to attend " Dead Spreads ", whether
> > in halls, church basement facilities, or private houses,
>
>
> Hey, Chuck Pahlinuik territory.. just like FIGHT CLUB.
>
> T.


"Dead spread" in Google got me the following:

[Nettime-bold] Prey for Peace Prey for the Dead Spread More Love

* To: nettime-l {AT} bbs.thing.net
* Subject: [Nettime-bold] Prey for Peace Prey for the Dead Spread
More Love
* From: Lee Wells <ifac {AT} yahoo.com>
* Date: Wed, 12 Sep 2001 21:08:07 -0700 (PDT)
* List-Id: the uncut, unmoderated version of nettime-l
<nettime-bold.nettime.org>
* Reply-To: nettime-bold {AT} nettime.org
* Sender: nettime-bold-admin {AT} nettime.org
=====
THE TIME IS NOW! .....www.imperfectfluids.com
IMPERFECT FLUIDS ARTS COLLECTIVE
244 Fifth Ave. #k292, New York, NY. 10001
phone: 212.561.0574
1579 N. Milwaukee Ave, Chicago IL. 60622
phone: 773.443.0222
IFAC {AT} YAHOO.COM

__________________________________________________
Terrorist Attacks on U.S. - How can you help?

------------------------------ and
-----------------------------------------------------------------

4-8 can't be beat

I settled into the 'dealer's zone' and waited for the line-up to
come out...Table 22. Ugh! A dead spread. Sounds hideous doesn't
it...like you're spreading dead on a piece of white, anemic bread,
mixing it with other dead things like meat, stuffing it together into a
sandwich...and you're going to like it! What kind of bottle or
packaging would it come in? Who would make it? Alright - my imagination
is done running away with me and I'm back to reality. A dead spread
is simply a table that has the lid off the box, no game, and a dealer
sits there for a half hour before getting pushed to the next table.

One time on Usenet, Melba's Jammin'
> said:

> We drove 2-1/2 hours northwest to attend the funeral of
> WhatshisnamehisnameisJamie's uncle. Nice man. Died too young. Too
> young. Damn cigarettes.

I quit last month (July 6th). I'm sorry about your friend, Barb.

> I wanted to see what kind of Dead Spread the
> Baptists put on. At LAST!! Food made by Church Ladies. Hotdish!
> Jell-o!! Ham for sandwiches (Wonder Bread slices, not dollar buns).
> Pickles. The dessert table was -- uh -- "different." Only my brownies
> and an angel food cake were on serving plates; everything else was still
> in its pan.

Miguel would have loved the food, particularly the hotdish.

> Rest in peace, Tim. Your grandson was blessed to have you for two years
> and he's heartbroken.

*Sigh*

--
"Kthonian" is Jani in WA
~ mom, Trollop, novice cook ~

One time on Usenet, Wayne Boatwright <wayneboatwright_at_gmail.com> said:
> Oh pshaw, on Tue 22 Aug 2006 02:58:59a, Michael "Dog3" Lonergan meant to
> say...
> > Damsel in dis Dress >
> > :

> >> Does it really matter how the desserts were displayed? They were made
> >> or purchased with love.
> >>
> >> I usually ignore dead spread threads, feeling that they're
> >> inappropriate, but that's just me. And a few others. You got lucky
> >> this time. I can't sleep. <G>

> > Why do you feel the "dead spread threads" are inappropriate? I don't.
>
> Let's face it...you just like a GOOD PARTY! :-)
>
> Personally, I'm with Carol.

And I'm with Michael -- after losing my mom and FIL in the
90's, I started noticing the food served at these things, so
I find it interesting. At least it's talk about food.

To each their own... :-)

--
"Kthonian" is Jani in WA
~ mom, Trollop, novice cook ~

in article , pfoley at
wrote on 8/22/06 10:51 AM:

>
> "Melba's Jammin'" > wrote in message
> ...
>> We drove 2-1/2 hours northwest to attend the funeral of
>> WhatshisnamehisnameisJamie's uncle. Nice man. Died too young. Too
>> young. Damn cigarettes. I wanted to see what kind of Dead Spread the
>> Baptists put on. At LAST!! Food made by Church Ladies. Hotdish!
>> Jell-o!! Ham for sandwiches (Wonder Bread slices, not dollar buns).
>> Pickles. The dessert table was -- uh -- "different." Only my brownies
>> and an angel food cake were on serving plates; everything else was still
>> in its pan.
>>
>> Rest in peace, Tim. Your grandson was blessed to have you for two years
>> and he's heartbroken.
>> --
>> -Barb, Mother Superior, HOSSSPoJ
>> http://jamlady.eboard.com - Dead Spread, 8-21-06
>> http://web.mac.com/barbschaller
> ====================
> The Irish American Wakes are the only way to go.
> --------------
Finally a thread I can address with modest authority! When I mostly gave up
a catering business I had, I found the calls from families of the deceased
to be the hardest to turn away. How do you say "no" to someone whose wife or
dad has just died?

So I ended up retaining only those, and am, in my particular little pond,
the Princess of "Collation" Foods... a slightly gentler euphemism for the
food after funerals and memorial services than "dead spread" or worse, "cold
meat parties"!!

It is fascinating indeed to see the differences in customs folks follow. In
our area (Boston) the Protestants go more for small sandwiches and little
desserts. Catholics, in general, host smaller groups with hardier fare,
something hot, potato salad, etc. Maybe that¹s because they hold funerals
before lunchtime almost exclusively.

My personal favorites are the elderly little ladies who eat with great
relish since so many of their meals are eaten alone, and who manage to haul
away an equal amount to enjoy back at home while they reflect on the
deceased, or about how fat Minnie has gotten.

Now the dilemma is: Is serving Devils Food or Angel Food cake in indelicate
taste? And, of those others who bake for funerals, does this problem ever
clutter their minds?

O:-)

Linda

"Michael "Dog3" Lonergan" > wrote in message
6.121...
> Damsel in dis Dress >
> :
>
>>
>> Does it really matter how the desserts were displayed? They were made
>> or purchased with love.
>>
>> I usually ignore dead spread threads, feeling that they're
>> inappropriate, but that's just me. And a few others. You got lucky
>> this time. I can't sleep. <G>
>>
>> Carol
>
> Why do you feel the "dead spread threads" are inappropriate? I don't. At
> least the threads are food related. I think that Barb was just making an
> observation regarding the desserts, nothing more or less. When I'm gone I
> want a big Irish Wake complete with all the food, music, booze and
> laughter
> to celebrate my life.
>

I want the same ... I just don't want to be dead first




> Ob DinnerLastNight:
>
> I pulled a Sandra Lee dinner last night. She woulda' been proud. Jimmy
> Dean's regular breakfast sausage made into patties, 2 egg omelets stuffed
> with green bell pepper, dicd red onion, mushrooms (canned) and slices of
> Kraft American cheese (pre-sliced). Buttermilk pancakes made from a box
> mix. The syrup was Karo pancake syrup. I was lazy and did it the SL way
> The home made part was cracking the eggs, dicing the pepper and onion,
> unwrapping the cheese, and pouring the milk and oil into the pancake mix.
>
> Michael
> Michael
>
>
>
> --
> The next new show on FoodTV?
>
> http://ebaumsworld.com/2006/07/bonappetite.html
>
>

"Melba's Jammin'" > wrote in message
...
> In article >,
> "Virginia Tadrzynski" > wrote:
>
>> There are a number of cookbooks that are specialty themed for foods taken
>> to
>> funerals along with funeral customs that usually accompany them.
>>
>> Hey, Barb, I was raised Baptist, did they have the raisin pie?
>> -ginny
>
> No pies. More cakes than I expected. No unusual bars. Almost had an
> Altar Call, though. The pastor had a captive audience.

ugh, isn't that just sick? The preacher at my sisters funeral did the same
thing ... the whole time I just thought of how manipulating and disgusting
he was ... a true testament to his character. After that day, I never spoke
to him again.
OB Food: I don't remember the lunch after her funeral at all ... I do
remember the bottle of Irish Whisky that my brothers and I shared that
evening.

LOL! And we
> KNOW that my favorite book on the topic is "Being Dead is No Excuse."
> --
> -Barb, Mother Superior, HOSSSPoJ
> http://jamlady.eboard.com
> http://web.mac.com/barbschaller

On Tue, 22 Aug 2006 09:14:31 -0500, Melba's Jammin'
> wrote:

>> I usually ignore dead spread threads, feeling that they're
>> inappropriate, but that's just me. And a few others. You got lucky
>> this time. I can't sleep. <G>
>
>*I* got lucky? Because you read the post? Oh my. Be still my heart.

You missed the big grin! I was being facetious/sarcastic/whatever.
Can't place my fingers on the correct word. I meant you got unlucky,
but that would have sounded weird.

This is all I'll say. I think that the purpose of funerals is to pay
respect to the deceased and to give comfort to their loved ones. I
just don't happen to agree with critiquing the food or anything else

Anyway, I'll KF those two words, instead of individual threads and
this won't happen again. Hope we're still friends.

Carol, who wants a giant Subway sub and some root beer at hers

Damsel in dis Dress wrote on 22 Aug 2006 in rec.food.cooking

> Carol, who wants a giant Subway sub and some root beer at hers
>

If you eat it...I'll come to it.

--


Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect

-Alan

Wayne Boatwright wrote:

> Oh pshaw, on Tue 22 Aug 2006 02:58:59a, Michael "Dog3" Lonergan meant to
> say...
>
> > Damsel in dis Dress >
> > :
> >
> >>
> >> Does it really matter how the desserts were displayed? They were made
> >> or purchased with love.
> >>
> >> I usually ignore dead spread threads, feeling that they're
> >> inappropriate, but that's just me. And a few others. You got lucky
> >> this time. I can't sleep. <G>
> >>
> >> Carol
> >
> > Why do you feel the "dead spread threads" are inappropriate? I don't.
>
> Let's face it...you just like a GOOD PARTY! :-)
>
> Personally, I'm with Carol.


Funerals and the whole culture around them are extremely morbid. I will
NEVER attend another funeral (and that includes a parental unit)...

Everyone should be cremated, no idiotic preacher service, no laying out the
deceased like a piece of meat on a slab, no wakes, no visitation, no
awfulness of burying someone to rot in the ground, no crappy and
insensitive "dead spread". This stuff is not only disrespectful to the
memory of the deceased, it's disprespectful to put the survivors through all
this crappy contrived drama.

If someone wants to hold some kind of remembrance service or party, that's
fine with me, but NONE of this funeral "business"...

In fact several folks I know who've recently passed on didn't even want any
kind of party or service or whatever, they just wanted their loved ones to
remember them as they had been in life. That's fine with me...

If you really want to be put off by the whole funeral schtick read
_Wisconsin Death Trip_, if you are wavering on the subject this will
absolutely convince you of the utter ghoulishness of the standard American
death rites.

--
Best
Greg

> wrote:

> My wife (who lived for 9 years in NW Minnesota) calls this sort of
> funeral food "death dishes". There are many of them found in church
> cookbooks.


Most all of those recipes are gawdawful and so could all be termed "death
dishes"...

The kiss of death recipe - wise is a recipe prefaced by the phrase, "Handed
down from a good old Norwegian (or Swedish) cook...".

--
Best
Greg

writes:
>
>Wayne Boatwright wrote:
>
>> Oh pshaw, on Tue 22 Aug 2006 02:58:59a, Michael "Dog3" Lonergan meant to
>> say...
>>
>> > Damsel in dis Dress >
>> > :
>> >
>> >>
>> >> Does it really matter how the desserts were displayed? They were made
>> >> or purchased with love.
>> >>
>> >> I usually ignore dead spread threads, feeling that they're
>> >> inappropriate, but that's just me. And a few others. You got lucky
>> >> this time. I can't sleep. <G>
>> >>
>> >> Carol
>> >
>> > Why do you feel the "dead spread threads" are inappropriate? I don't.
>>
>> Let's face it...you just like a GOOD PARTY! :-)
>>
>> Personally, I'm with Carol.
>
>
>Funerals and the whole culture around them are extremely morbid. I will
>NEVER attend another funeral (and that includes a parental unit)...
>
>Everyone should be cremated, no idiotic preacher service, no laying out the
>deceased like a piece of meat on a slab, no wakes, no visitation, no
>awfulness of burying someone to rot in the ground, no crappy and
>insensitive "dead spread". This stuff is not only disrespectful to the
>memory of the deceased, it's disprespectful to put the survivors through all
>this crappy contrived drama.
>
>If someone wants to hold some kind of remembrance service or party, that's
>fine with me, but NONE of this funeral "business"...
>
>In fact several folks I know who've recently passed on didn't even want any
>kind of party or service or whatever, they just wanted their loved ones to
>remember them as they had been in life. That's fine with me...
>
>If you really want to be put off by the whole funeral schtick read
>_Wisconsin Death Trip_, if you are wavering on the subject this will
>absolutely convince you of the utter ghoulishness of the standard American
>death rites.
>
>--
>Best
>Greg


hey Greg

did you know that your name rhymes with "Wackery Wacko"?

In article >,
Damsel in dis Dress > wrote:

> Anyway, I'll KF those two words, instead of individual threads and
> this won't happen again. Hope we're still friends.

Heck ya.

> Carol, who wants a giant Subway sub and some root beer at hers

And you, Alexdammit, expect me to NOT REMARK ON IT IF I SHOULD STILL BE
VERTICAL MYSELF? Dream on.


--
-Barb, Mother Superior, HOSSSPoJ
http://jamlady.eboard.com
http://web.mac.com/barbschaller

tert in seattle wrote:

writes:
> >
> >Wayne Boatwright wrote:
> >
> >> Oh pshaw, on Tue 22 Aug 2006 02:58:59a, Michael "Dog3" Lonergan meant
to
> >> say...
> >>
> >> > Damsel in dis Dress >
> >> > :
> >> >
> >> >>
> >> >> Does it really matter how the desserts were displayed? They were
made
> >> >> or purchased with love.
> >> >>
> >> >> I usually ignore dead spread threads, feeling that they're
> >> >> inappropriate, but that's just me. And a few others. You got lucky
> >> >> this time. I can't sleep. <G>
> >> >>
> >> >> Carol
> >> >
> >> > Why do you feel the "dead spread threads" are inappropriate? I
don't.
> >>
> >> Let's face it...you just like a GOOD PARTY! :-)
> >>
> >> Personally, I'm with Carol.
> >
> >
> >Funerals and the whole culture around them are extremely morbid. I will
> >NEVER attend another funeral (and that includes a parental unit)...
> >
> >Everyone should be cremated, no idiotic preacher service, no laying out
the
> >deceased like a piece of meat on a slab, no wakes, no visitation, no
> >awfulness of burying someone to rot in the ground, no crappy and
> >insensitive "dead spread". This stuff is not only disrespectful to the
> >memory of the deceased, it's disprespectful to put the survivors through
all
> >this crappy contrived drama.
> >
> >If someone wants to hold some kind of remembrance service or party,
that's
> >fine with me, but NONE of this funeral "business"...
> >
> >In fact several folks I know who've recently passed on didn't even want
any
> >kind of party or service or whatever, they just wanted their loved ones
to
> >remember them as they had been in life. That's fine with me...
> >
> >If you really want to be put off by the whole funeral schtick read
> >_Wisconsin Death Trip_, if you are wavering on the subject this will
> >absolutely convince you of the utter ghoulishness of the standard
American
> >death rites.
> >
> >--
> >Best
> >Greg
>
>
> hey Greg
>
> did you know that your name rhymes with "Wackery Wacko"?
>


Is that a "Tusharism"...???

)

--
Best
Greg

"Muckerheide" > wrote

> Finally a thread I can address with modest authority! When I mostly gave
> up
> a catering business I had, I found the calls from families of the deceased
> to be the hardest to turn away. How do you say "no" to someone whose wife
> or
> dad has just died?

Wow, I loved that story. How interesting.

nancy

Melba's Jammin' wrote:
>
> In article <qDEGg.4671$W01.3178@dukeread08>,
> Faux_Pseudo > wrote:
>
> > _.-In rec.food.cooking, Melba's Jammin' wrote the following -._
> > >> Does it really matter how the desserts were displayed?
> > >
> > > It does. :-P How am I going to uphold and protect my reputation as
> > > Dead Spread Critic Weirdo if I doesn't comment on presentation? Really!
> >
> > After checking the link in your sig I couldn't help but think of a
> > nice big coffee table book of food for the dead. Recipes and tomb
> > stones.
>
> I like it. Do we collaborate? You do the rocks and I do the spreads?
>
> > While looking at the pictures in the link I was thinking that massive
> > comfort foods would be at a funeral, not ham sandwiches. Where are
> > the big ol' pots of stew, the potato dishes or cheese cakes that are
> > so heavy that one spoonful or slice could cause the folding table to
> > buckle under the load?
>
> Those are things of the past. A sign of the times. I talked to my
> pastor (suburban church) yesterday about it and the lack of 'real food'
> at the Dead Spreads and he told me how hard it is to get anyone to
> volunteer to SERVE the meal much less *prepare and donate* food for it.
> I told him I wanted to be on the serving committee. :-) (My photo ops
> are about to increase!!)
>
> Working folks don't have time and not much inclination to make time for
> such an occasion. I'd hoped that since this was a small town funeral,
> things would be different. El Pastor pointed out that farm folk are
> busy and maybe couldn't be bothered to do a serving plate thing -- one
> more plate or dish to wash.

Two of my cousins passed away in the last year, and services were
held in a local funeral home that has a meeting room and they will cater
the lunch....sandwiches,veggie nibbles, desserts, tea and coffee, milk
and juice........Sharon

writes:
>
>tert in seattle wrote:
>
>>
>> hey Greg
>>
>> did you know that your name rhymes with "Wackery Wacko"?
>>
>
>
>Is that a "Tusharism"...???
>
>)


I hope I die far enough in the future that they'll have perfected 3 - d
animated hologram technology ... that way I can give my own eulogy....!!!

tert in trnovo escribe:

> writes:
> >
> >tert in seattle wrote:
> >
> >>
> >> hey Greg
> >>
> >> did you know that your name rhymes with "Wackery Wacko"?
> >>
> >
> >
> >Is that a "Tusharism"...???
> >
> >)
>
>
> I hope I die far enough in the future that they'll have perfected 3 - d
> animated hologram technology ... that way I can give my own eulogy....!!!
>


They were talking about "video tombstones" on the Kathy & Judy Show on WGN
this morning...it's no lie!

--
Best
Greg

"The Ranger" > wrote in message
...

> I ran my Sainted MotherT's wake just as requested. Jameson's, Guinness,
> food enough to keep people talking, and a piper that allowed people to
> remember her fondly. The piper was awesome and SWMBO & I outdid
> ourselves on the foods! 475 people ate, drank, sang, told me stories,
> and danced the afternoon away. No one cried. That is the way a wake
> should be enjoyed!

Way to go (out)! Will you cater mine?

Felice

Helen Harrand > wrote in message
...
> "The Ranger" > wrote in message
...
> > pfoley > wrote in message
. net...

> > > The Irish American Wakes are the only way to go.
> >
> > Murphy's in one hand, Guinness in t'other!
> >
> My father remarried 10 years before his death and my
> stepmom is Irish/American. My father did NOT want
> folks coming back to the house or any "fuss". Yeap,
> that was my dad. On the other hand my stepmom did
> want a kinda wake. She started talking about getting it
> catered and I looked at her funny and told her that I'd
> do it. Her words to me? "Make it nice". I think I made
> her happy. We had lamb chops, shrimp, antipasta, all
> kinds of stuff. And booze. Lots of booze. Those old
> Floridians that dad knew can DRINK!!!! We had two
> 1.75 bottles of vodka and had to go break into the stash
> that hub and I were taking back to AL with us. Damn,
> those folks can DRINK!!
>
> Stepmom was happy, dad was no the wiser that folks
> were at the house, talking about him and making a fuss.
> It was actually a very nice time.

I ran my Sainted MotherT's wake just as requested. Jameson's, Guinness,
food enough to keep people talking, and a piper that allowed people to
remember her fondly. The piper was awesome and SWMBO & I outdid
ourselves on the foods! 475 people ate, drank, sang, told me stories,
and danced the afternoon away. No one cried. That is the way a wake
should be enjoyed!

My Uncle, her eldest brother, also made merry at his wake, only Murphy's
was his drink of choice.

Two great people that knew how to celebrate life... And death.

The Ranger
--
"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of
arriving safely, in an attractive and well-preserved body. Rather one
should skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other,
body thoroughly used up, totally worn out while screaming 'WOO HOO! What
a ride!'"
-- Anonymous

writes:
>
>tert in trnovo escribe:
>
>> writes:
>> >
>> >tert in seattle wrote:
>> >
>> >>
>> >> hey Greg
>> >>
>> >> did you know that your name rhymes with "Wackery Wacko"?
>> >>
>> >
>> >
>> >Is that a "Tusharism"...???
>> >
>> >)
>>
>>
>> I hope I die far enough in the future that they'll have perfected 3 - d
>> animated hologram technology ... that way I can give my own eulogy....!!!
>>
>
>
>They were talking about "video tombstones" on the Kathy & Judy Show on WGN
>this morning...it's no lie!

I'm ahead of my time

"Gregory Morrow" >
wrote in
ink.net:

> Funerals and the whole culture around them are extremely
> morbid. I will NEVER attend another funeral (and that
> includes a parental unit)...
>
> Everyone should be cremated, no idiotic preacher service,
> no laying out the deceased like a piece of meat on a slab,
> no wakes, no visitation, no awfulness of burying someone to
> rot in the ground, no crappy and insensitive "dead
> spread". This stuff is not only disrespectful to the
> memory of the deceased, it's disprespectful to put the
> survivors through all this crappy contrived drama.

you know, i was getting all set to disagree, but... i don't.
i think the funeral director society has far too much clout in
deciding how these things will be run & how much they're going
to make off the bereaved.
however, the wake & dead spread and any subsequent party is
all the bereaved family's thing. it's not disrespectful of the
dead. it's celebrating the deceased's life & is the thing that
brings togeather the living. i've never been to a wake that
was 'full of contrived drama', even the wakes for kids that
died.
>
> If someone wants to hold some kind of remembrance service
> or party, that's fine with me, but NONE of this funeral
> "business"...

ok, but a wake, a real wake, isn't visiting hours at the dead
parlor...
>
> In fact several folks I know who've recently passed on
> didn't even want any kind of party or service or whatever,
> they just wanted their loved ones to remember them as they
> had been in life. That's fine with me...

that is as it should be (unless they were real prunes in
life...)

> If you really want to be put off by the whole funeral
> schtick read _Wisconsin Death Trip_, if you are wavering on
> the subject this will absolutely convince you of the utter
> ghoulishness of the standard American death rites.

i dunno about ghoulishness. we aren't as bad as the
Victorians when it comes to that! they had so odd ideas!
lee



--
Question with boldness even the existence of god; because if
there be
one, he must more approve the homage of reason than that of
blindfolded
fear. - Thomas Jefferson

Felice Friese > wrote in message
...
> "The Ranger" > wrote in message
...

> > I ran my Sainted MotherT's wake just as requested.
> > Jameson's, Guinness, food enough to keep people
> > talking, and a piper that allowed people to remember
> > her fondly. The piper was awesome and SWMBO &
> > I outdid ourselves on the foods! 475 people ate, drank,
> > sang, told me stories, and danced the afternoon away.
> > No one cried. That is the way a wake should be enjoyed!
>
> Way to go (out)! Will you cater mine?

Find the piper and you're on.

The Ranger

_.-In rec.food.cooking, Melba's Jammin' wrote the following -._
>> After checking the link in your sig I couldn't help but think of a
>> nice big coffee table book of food for the dead. Recipes and tomb
>> stones.
>
> I like it. Do we collaborate? You do the rocks and I do the spreads?

I am too busy with ASCII art and satire pieces to be starting another
project. Besides I haven't the skills needed to carve recipies into
tomb stones.

>> Where are
>> the big ol' pots of stew, the potato dishes or cheese cakes that are
>> so heavy that one spoonful or slice could cause the folding table to
>> buckle under the load?
>
> Those are things of the past. A sign of the times. I talked to my
> pastor (suburban church) yesterday about it and the lack of 'real food'
> at the Dead Spreads and he told me how hard it is to get anyone to
> volunteer to SERVE the meal much less *prepare and donate* food for it.
> I told him I wanted to be on the serving committee. :-) (My photo ops
> are about to increase!!)

Supprised you didn't ask earlier. This might be the begining of a new
business opportunity for you. "Dead Spread Catering". I can see
franchises located next to every mortuary in the country.

>> camera, wild hair and a jeans and a T-Shirt. I can only assume that
>> you are being invited so you have a leg up on me.
>
> Oh, heck yes. I don't crash strangers' services or plantings. What?
> You think I'm weird or something? <looks around suspiciously>

Now you can be part of the hired help.

--
=()==()==()==()==()- http://fauxascii.com
\ \ \ \ \ \ ASCII artist
:F_P:-O- -O- -O- -O- -O- -O- -O-
\ \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \

_.-In rec.food.cooking, Muckerheide wrote the following -._
> Now the dilemma is: Is serving Devils Food or Angel Food cake in indelicate
> taste? And, of those others who bake for funerals, does this problem ever
> clutter their minds?

Thanks for the informative post.

As for your question: I would make both and see which one has the
least leftovers. I would stay away from the 'Hot as Hell Texas Chili'
though.

--
=()==()==()==()==()- http://fauxascii.com
\ \ \ \ \ \ ASCII artist
:F_P:-O- -O- -O- -O- -O- -O- -O-
\ \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \

"The Ranger" > wrote in message
...
> pfoley > wrote in message
> . net...
>
> > The Irish American Wakes are the only way to go.
>
> Murphy's in one hand, Guinness in t'other!
>
> The Ranger
>
>


My father remarried 10 years before his death and my stepmom is
Irish/American. My father did NOT want folks coming back to the house or
any "fuss". Yeap, that was my dad. On the other hand my stepmom did want a
kinda wake. She started talking about getting it catered and I looked at
her funny and told her that I'd do it. Her words to me? "Make it nice". I
think I made her happy. We had lamb chops, shrimp, antipasta, all kinds of
stuff. And booze. Lots of booze. Those old Floridians that dad knew can
DRINK!!!! We had two 1.75 bottles of vodka and had to go break into the
stash that hub and I were taking back to AL with us. Damn, those folks can
DRINK!!

Stepmom was happy, dad was no the wiser that folks were at the house,
talking about him and making a fuss. It was actually a very nice time.

helen